When you have 100 llbs+ to lose.

Surround yourself, online at least with people that have been where you are, or still are. Some of us have dropped that hundred or more and still have another hundred to go to real personal goals.

There are several groups on here that will help you, where you can post successes for cheers, frustrations to at least get an I understand and here's what I did, and you in turn can help others which is where you really start to turn the corner.

Don't exist there solely though. This site has incredibly wise people mixed in and I'm sure some of those who follow who are better at keeping links handy than I will point you to some of the best by SideSteel and others.

May I also point out that losing ten pounds in NOT just a drop in the bucket. It is 10% of the way to your goal. Every journey begins... Also while you are giving yourself some credit, the fact that you have continued to go to that exercise class and are winning the mental game is huge. I would bet that if you stick with it, you will get more people who are cheering you on, than are snidely wondering what you are doing there. There really are more nice people in the world than mean. Don't let the mean ones rule your mental process.

If you would like, feel free to check out the group "Let's lose 100+" and see if it is a comfortable fit for you.

I do have some advice for you that I have realized after seeing my health fail from obesity related diseases.
#1 You don't go on a diet, you change your lifestyle. This means that you embrace a total new way of eatting for the rest of your life. I decided that I was going to embrace the Mediterran diet. I love their food and it is heart healthy. I'm from southwest Georgia which is fried chicken and fried vegetables all day long and then sit the rest of the day. So I'm cutting out snack foods, processed food, fast food etc. If they don't eat it in the mediterran I'm not eatting it. I went to the library got books on the meditteran diet and I'm learning fast. I also watch alot of the food channels and the chew so I c an learn how to cook delicious food. I would never it fast food even their salad taste like junk now. This is important that you learn to eat great nutritious food and leave your old diet behind. A new lifestyle will keep you motivated and you will turn to healthy forever.

#2 You have to make your health a priority and move other stuff and people out your life. You will be surprised what drains your energy. I found trying to deal with negative people just japped my energy and made me want to eat. When I go around them, I just don't talk to them, keep it light conversation, play with my cellphone and keep it moving. I worked exercise into my day, watching tv I walk in place, I walk more around my neighborhood etc.

I feel better emotionally, and I'm headed toward getting this weight off.
OBESITY IS A DISEASE OF YOUR LIFESTYLE AND ITS A PROGRESSIVE DISEASE. The cure for obesity is changing your lifestyle.

Be Strong, Live Strong!!!!

I'm glad I ran across your post because my position on the issue have shifted significantly over the last few months and this gives me a good opportunity organize my ideas.

Disclaimer: I'm speaking for myself with no science to back any of this up, so take it with a grain of salt.

Over the last several months I've shifted my efforts from trying to directly lose weight to trying to change the way I think. For example, my goal is no longer a specific weight or body image but rather the creation of a healthier mindset which, in time, will lead to those old goals. I try not to care about what the scales say except in what they can tell me about wether I'm making the right food and life choices.

I've heard people say things like this before but I always discounted the sentiment as new age-y nonsense. Honestly, I probably wasn't mature enough or in the right headspace to make a major life change. In many ways it is a tougher road for me to take, but the promise is that if I succeed I won't have to worry about staying on a diet and exercise program. Instead, it will just be what I do. This is becoming particularly nice, because as I've gotten better at thinking this way, I've noticed that I no longer *constantly* think about food. It does feel like it takes more work and mindfulness to make a mental change but, happily, it also seems to take less net willpower after the initial effort.

I'm 5'10" and down to 235 from 298 over the last 8 months. I've still got progress left to make, but its starting to feel like its down hill from here. I've got a nice work out routine and because I've gotten to the point where I look forward to the exercise I think I can stick with it for a long time. I've learned how to shop for healthy groceries and have pretty much made it a habit now. I've also learned a healthy respect for restaurants and I'm developing a pretty good sense of what I should and shouldn't eat while there. Finally, I completely removed some food that I can't control (most carbs) and I don't know if I'll ever bother reintegrating them into my life. Snacks are still a little bit of a problem, but they're next on my list of problems to solve.

In short, I think a physical battle with weight is not winnable for me. At best it would be a stalemate that goes on the rest of my life. So instead, I'm trying to change the game to a mental problem that (I think) I can solve permanently. I hope that if I can get my heart right, the body will follow and there will be less room for negative thoughts to derail the progress.

jlscrandt-people do notice a 40 pound loss, but when we weight well over 200 pounds, ( and I am assuming this is the case since you want to lose 100) they are kind of afraid to say anything because they are not quite sure what is going on. One of my dear friends came into my office after I had lost 38 pounds and closed the door (at that point, I was at 197 which is hardly svelte for someone who is 5'4" tall LOL). Then she very quietly said "Everyone is afraid to say anything to you, but you appear to be losing weight so is this on purpose or are you sick and not telling anyone?" So people had noticed for a bit, but were afraid to mention it. So please, do not allow your self feeling to be motivated by other people because you have no idea what they are really thinking.

Second, do not look at the 100 pound goal or you will give it up. I have been at this since Aug 2012 and still have not hit 100, although I am close :blushing: . Focus on 5 pounds at a time. At first, when you need motivation the most, you will have many celebratory days as weight comes off fairly quickly so those 5 pound "Woot" days are fairly regular. Once the loss begins to slow down though, you will still be making progress, 5 pounds at a time and shoot, you can do stick to it and lose 5 measly pounds right? I also found that tracking things in a WORD or Excel file helped a lot. I track my measurements, weight loss, blood pressure, BMI reductions etc in a WORD file. I did it every 2 weeks until 2 months ago when I went to once month. It helps so much when you are feeling down to look back at how far you have come and there is something about seeing it that makes it real!

Third, whenever you start the negative head talk, counter it with "Well, I did not lose any weight this week, BUT I worked out 5 days!" or "Shoot, I only lost .4 pounds this week, BUT my jeans are getting HUGE!" or " I am a bad person because I did not work out this week BUT I did not eat over my calorie goal either!" Learn to use the word BUT and follow any negative thought with a positive thought. It sounds simple, but it keeps the negativity in check.

Finally, although everyone says this, it bears repeating-this is a lifestyle change and there is no way around it. Forget the gym if you hate it and have to talk yourself into going all the time as that will eventually suck so much energy that you will give up. Find something you like to do that motivates you to be active. For some people, it is running, dancing, biking or lifting heavy stuff! I have discovered mountain hiking and I LOVE it! So, all winter long, I do indoor/outdoor (weather permitting) walking (keep my cardio endurance up) and strength exercises (especially arms, core and legs because I need them to hike :-)) right in my house for free :bigsmile: except for the mat and weights. Come April, I am in shape to conquer a mountain and have been motivated all winter to be active!! So, find something you will love to do for the rest of your life and focus on that. It is a lifestyle change and you will not keep up with something that causes you mental anguish to do. It simply takes too long to lose 100 pounds to be doing stuff you hate.

There will be downs (i.e. weeks of gaining , no time to work out, exceeding your calorie goal and, as I sadly discovered, colds!!!!:laugh: ) and ups (weight loss in POUNDS :drinker:, 5 days of working out, and weeks of not exceeding your calorie goal) because like everything else, that is life! Go for it!!!!! :flowerforyou:

Any advice from those who have been there before would be appreciated.

For those who do it, I imagine they are also conquering much of the self doubt that likely brought on the weight gain to begin with. You inspire me.

I have an exercise class I've been going to for awhile. I enjoy the workout, but still feel like everyone wonders why the heck I'm there. I'm probably more worried about what I look like than anyone else, but I still have to mentally prepare myself before going to class. I keep going, but some days I can't stand the mental turmoil I have to put myself through to be there.

This time I know I'm going to have to find the confidence to do this myself. I've lost a total of 10 so far since starting in early May. I can't count on validation from others in my quest to lose weight. This is my journey. Last week, I struggled with a busy schedule at work and a mind that said, "What makes you think you can do this? Ten pounds is just a drop in the bucket. You are going to have to get tough mentally if you think you are going to lose the next 90 and you're weak and tired and too freaking busy with work and kids."

I guess I'd like to hear from others who have 100 pounds or more to lose or from those who have already done it. How do you keep yourself focused. How do your train your mind along with your body? For me, my negative thought patterns are more than half the battle.

Good morning,

I wanted to congratulate you on your first 10 lost, your knowingness that you are the one that can make this happen and your willingness to seek advice!

For me, I had to learn how to be kind to myself. If I beat myself up every time I slipped I would never get anywhere. This is not easy. Being cheerleader of others helped me tremendously. If I'm busy supporting someone I can't beat myself up for eating too much or moving too little.

I take every day as the come sometimes every hour as it comes. My motto is always to do better than I did the last time. If I do that, I can't fail.

As for your exercise class I know how you feel. I have cerebral palsy, I am DIFFERENT. I walk different, I talk different, I look different (and I'm short and fat, it's like the lottery of freak of nature over here). The CP is a fact that I can't change and I've lived my whole life with it.) I won't lie *sometimes* people stare, they glance and they look. It's uncomfortable. The thing is, we're all human and we all look at things that are different. Bigger, smaller, oddities and all. The thing is, we don't know what people are thinking while they are looking. I catch myself staring all the time and have to keep myself in check. I am never intentionally thinking anything negative. I'll catch myself thinking, "look at that person doing something great" or as much as a lot of PWDs hate it, "That person is inspiring to me". Just keep going and try to think about the positive things people are thinking because chances are if they really are looking (and sometimes they aren't!) they're not thinking as bad of thoughts as we imagine.

I wish you all the best, you can do this!

I'm in the same boat. In past years, I've been down anywhere from 50-60lb from my current weight. I seem to put it back on to the same weight and then start over. I've been lucky in that my close friends have always noticed my weight loss and commented positively on it.

I've struggled with diets and workout schedules, but I'm definitely seeing that it is absolutely about a lifestyle and mindset change more than it is about dieting and working out. Those are tools that are implemented to assist with the lifestyle and mindset changes. It's not easy, when you've spent your life overweight, to change how your mind perceives yourself, your body and your choices. I know I'm always looking for instant gratification and that is not the case with a change like this. My brain gets into a self-destructive pattern that says I'm not worth the effort. I should just stay overweight because it's too hard to lose the weight, and what does it matter anyway, because my personality is more important anyway. But, the reality is, my body won't support this weight much longer. Before long, my health will start to show the stress this weight is putting on it. My sister is between 300 and 500lbs, never giving the same number twice in conversation and 5'2",at 32 years old has a heart condition and is both pre-diabetic and has constant stress fractures in her feet from the minimal amount she is able to walk. Perhaps seeing those words out there will help me with my own motivation....

I have lost 39 pounds and have 100 to go. I lurk the forums, look through the awe-inspiring success stories, think about how I want to be one of those someday, and keep pushing through. My resolve isn't always so high. I make mistakes. That's probably one of my biggest motivators - I've gone so far in 9 months that giving up would be silly. Just keep pushing through and remember that you won't lost it all in a day or even a month. You can do this!

I haven’t lost 100lbs but I’ll tell you what works for me, its small steps and small goals. I set personal goals and work hard to attain them. Once in a while a friend will challenge me to a weight loss “contest” for the month and it really helps to be able to chat with someone who is striving to attain your same goal. I find myself cheering them on and trying to offer encouragement which in turn helps me. Have faith in yourself and just do it for you and don’t worry if anyone else notices how much you might have lost. I find that some of my friends will always mention my loss and others act as though they don’t notice any difference.
Bottom line is make up your mind and change your mind set for success and above all KMF! (Keep Moving Forward)

What worked for me is never thinking in the long term. I get up everyday and say "I'm going to have the best day I can" Some days I rock, some days not so much. Also I never thought about giving up this time, although I'm not sure why?! Mindset does play a big roll. Just remember as long as you don't give up you are still trying.
Good luck to you.