It's summer and I am not bikini ready

There will always be someone more _______ than me. Skinnier, flatter tummy, bigger boobs, whatever......
Just have to realize that there is more to life than appearance, and keep working towards your goals. It takes time, and it takes work, and it doesn't happen overnight. Just work on being the best "you" you can be and stop worrying about how other people look.

True. There is no secret formula... and there will always be someone, thinner, stronger, richer, etc. etc. Personally I begin to feel better about myself as I stick to my goals and see progress. Even small victories ... You can't change the past- only move forward from today!

I wish I had a secret to share that would help you. I do not know if it is my age (maturity not withstanding) but I have come to realize, who cares. I may leer at the gorgeous bikini bodies because I am envious but this is the body that I own. It is strong, capable and there is nothing to be ashamed about. Stretchmarks and scars and a little extra padding. It is mind and I have two bikinis now. I wasn't feeling very good about my body when I went to the lake but I decided to go ahead an put on the bikini anyhow, forget the one piece. I will NEVER look like those girls that I admire but that should not keep me from loving myself. They don't have to admire me but I will not allow them to shame me for a body that belongs to me and is the only one I will ever own.
5 years ago I never wore shorts, even in summer. But slowly, methodically, my self dialogue becomes kinder and I do not tear myself apart in front of the mirror. The body love continues to improve, and I have a long way to go, but I have come along way.

One woman I love is Jade Beall, she is a photographer that helped empower me to accept my perceived imperfections as perfectly normal.

I hope you learn to find confidence and know you are worthy of your own love. :flowerforyou:

I am so with you! I can't afford even wearing dresses, not to mention shorts or anything... short. It's summer, nice weather, and I still wear jeans, just white ones. I want to look nice in shorts so badly that I scream at myself for being so utterly ugly, but I can't do anything about it. I want to be admired in shorts, not commented upon as in "hey, so what that you have fat legs, you managed to squeeze into shorts, congrats!" I seem to be losing weight everywhere apart from my thighs. It is so distressing that I am at a loss. I look almost disproportioned b/c I wear different size for my T-shirt & jeans (8 and 12 (UK) respectively ) It is depressing, but I know that I must not stop, eventually I'll be there where I want and wear clothes that I want.

Take up running. I know that you can't spot reduce, but running has made my thighs lose inches faster than they ever have before. Seriously, I've always had huge thighs, now I look at them and can't believe how thin they are!

As for the rest, you need to work on your inside. You could be rail thin and still not want to wear shorts if you can't get your self confidence under control.

How to get a bikini body in one easy step:

1. Put a bikini on your body.

OK here's the thing.. I had never ever felt good about my body and never worn a bikini, not even when I was skinny and probably underweight (because I felt fat and ugly then too).

3 years ago I weighed more than I ever had done but chose a beach holiday and took only bikinis. Want to know why?

I broke my back 6 months earlier. Then I had my gall bladder removed so I had a huge scar down my torso. That's when I realized none of the rest matters. I got my scars and my body out for all too see. I even ended up going topless on that holiday. Nobody cared. Nobody was staring or laughing or judging. Nobody cared.

Do what you want to do. The first time feels scary but when you get no reaction you'll find it easier next time.

Do something that scares you, go on.

AWESOME. +1 million. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

For me it's not a seasonal thing. I made a goal, I want to be fit and healthy. It might take years, as I am loosing weight but still eating poorly. This whole process is a transition, and setting a goal based on a season will only make it worse for me. Do stuff that makes you happy, try and remember why your doing this, and let the rest of the stuff go.

I had to work an event for my job and it was at the beach last week so I found my eyes bombarded by seemingly happy scantily clad young women. The last time I went out with my husband and he checked out a another girl in super short skirt, I became an emotional mess because I felt so unattractive. Both instances have made me realize the problem is with me. I know I have a long way to go before getting my confidence and body back but is anyone else feeling the summer blues as all the short shorts and bikini tops come out on display? If so, how do you stay confident in the skin you're in while striving for beauty on the outside and in?

Unfortunately men will be men, they will always on the beach look at younger women with hot bodies. Not much one can do about it.

I had to work an event for my job and it was at the beach last week so I found my eyes bombarded by seemingly happy scantily clad young women. The last time I went out with my husband and he checked out a another girl in super short skirt, I became an emotional mess because I felt so unattractive. Both instances have made me realize the problem is with me. I know I have a long way to go before getting my confidence and body back but is anyone else feeling the summer blues as all the short shorts and bikini tops come out on display? If so, how do you stay confident in the skin you're in while striving for beauty on the outside and in?

My two cents - There's only one step to getting a bikini body: You put on a friggin bikini.

You do not exist for the viewing pleasure of others. Wear what makes you feel good and quit "fat shaming" yourself. It's no one's business what you wear to where (I mean, don't stroll around nekkid, though, you'll get arrested.)

In all seriousness, if you got paid just to look good (like models do) then you'd have a personal trainer and a personal chef and you'd spend 8 hours a day just tending to your body. Average people like you and me don't have that luxury. So I say, take the attitude of not caring what others think about how you look. You're on this site, you're taking steps towards getting healthy, and that's what matters. Take confidence in that!

Besides, as the good doctor said, "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind!"

I hope you find your courage to just do it. So many great stories here about folks just realizing we should just step out and do it, because its not about judgement from everyone else, its about how we feel.

Yes, he'll look no matter what, but you know what, I bet you he doesn't remember a thing. He remembers when you are radiant from being happy with yourself. He remembers how you great you make him feel when you are not down on yourself about something he can't help you with.
We all want to feel like the most beautiful thing in the eyes of our partners, but they can only see that when you do too. (But side note, let's also use it as a reminder that we should put in effort to make them feel sexy and appreciated too. Never take them for granted)