im confused ?

It's takes a very long time for starvation mode to kick in. Also even if it does kick in, it's simply is a lowering of metabolism. I'm not okay with it, just trying to clarify how it works.

I'm a 26yo female that weighs 224lbs, and my calorie goal is 2200. I'm a patient transporter at a hospital (lots of walking and pushing heavy equipment) so I put my lifestyle as lightly active, because even though I move a lot at work, at home I basically like to sit around and play video games or read and write. I generally try to stick within a couple hundred calories of that goal. What makes a difference for me is that I make sure to get a lot of protein, more than they recommend, and I try to reduce my carbs and fats without going overboard. I also go walking/jogging three times a week, and do some light strength training on the days I don't walk, with one day of rest. When I accurately log everything I eat, drink lots of water, and stay pretty close to my goal without going over, I manage to lose at a decent rate of 1-2 lbs per week.

Also, some people talk about eating their work out calories back, I don't do that. Generally I don't earn more than 200-300 calories per day, so as long as I get at least 2,000 calories in, I don't worry about it. I find that what helps for me is to log my food at the beginning of the day, and then throw everything into my lunch bag, so that whenever I'm hungry, I just get something from my bag and know it's already accounted for.

I'm eating 2300 and losing. I'm only about 148 right now, but I'm very active. The heavier you are, the more your body uses to fuel itself and keep itself up and running. If you eat too many calories under what your body needs to stay where it is, you end up hungry and it's more difficult to stay on track. Personally, when I was eating less than 2300, I would end up binging every couple of days but I was still losing weight. I decided it's better to eat MORE, lose weight SLOWER and be less miserable. That being said, 1800 isn't going to make you starve and you should definitely be able to lose weight, but perhaps you should consider trying the 2200 for a month and see if you lose any weight.

A lot of people on this site will suggest figuring out what your TDEE is (total daily energy expenditure: how many calories you actually burn every day at your height/age/weight and activity level) and eat about 15% fewer calories than that. You won't feel hungry and you won't lose weight super fast so you'll keep more of your muscle.

I always wonder about this. How active is very active? I'm 5'11" 245-250lbs and I can't seem to do anything but gain and lose the same 5lbs. I lift heavy 4 days a week and but don't do much cardio (since everyone swears up and down you don't need it) beyond a 15 mile bike ride on weekends. So I guess there's my question. How does a female who weights 100lbs less than me lose weight eating almost as much? LOL Because I want to do whatever you're doing so I'll actually get results.

I think you're missing the point when people say you don't have to do a ton of cardio...you don't..it's absolutely unnecessary...but it does increase your body's energy requirements....that's what you're missing, there is a direct corelation between your activity and your body's energy (calorie) requirements.

Let's look at it for what it is...basic math. Let's say I don't do any cardio but lift weights and I lose about 1 Lb per week eating 2,000 calories...that would mean that my maintenance number with the same activity level is around 2,500 calories. Now let's say I want to start training for a 1/2 century ride, so I start riding around 100 miles per week on my bike...I've just substantially increased my energy expenditure. Let's say a typical 15 mile ride gets me about 500 calories (for ease of math) and I ride these 15 miles every single day...I now would require 3000 calories to maintain (2500 + 500) and I could still lose that same 1 Lb per week now eating 2,500 calories rather than 2,000.

Oh I get it, TDEE, etc etc. I've been doing this a while, as I've already lost quite a bit. I just kind of stalled. I get that moving more raises your TDEE. I'm just wondering what a females activity level has to be to require 2300 calories. I'm not counting calories now but when I did I was eating 2400-2500 a day as IIFYM suggested (for my age, height, weight, and working out 4 days a week) and no results. I'm just wondering does she lift, does she run 5 miles a day, does she bike 90 miles a day, etc?.

EDIT: The reason I bring this up is you see the whole "eat more to lose" come answer come up alot. Women will say it and almost brag about how much they're eating. They never go in to specifics of what type of activity they do to support eating all those calories.

For a female of a healthy weight to lose eating 2400 - 2500 calories per day, they would have to be doing a LOT of moving. I'm a 5'10" male and I lose on 2400 - 2500 calories because I ride my bike anywhere from 75 - 100 miles per week and I ride pretty hard...hills, wind, etc. I also lift for around 90 minutes 3x weekly and I swim a mile once per week. When I'm not at work, I'm generally on my feet...I'm the primary cook in the house, so I'm busy throwing together dinner and what not when I get home..then beyond that there's always yard maintenance to do or something that needs fixed...I generally only sit down for about 30 minutes before bed to unwind and watch some dumb show on t.v. that doesn't require a whole lot of thought...then off to bed to read. I sit most of the day at work at a desk but I make up for that when I'm not at work.

Ultimately, all of these calculators just give you a good starting point...if you're just losing and gaining the same 3-5 Lbs that's actually what maintenance looks like and you need to reduce your intake...your TDEE isn't as high as you thought it was. Frankly, a lot of people tend to overestimate their activity...they may move for an hour or more every day, but they over estimate the actual work they're doing and thus overestimate their activity levels with TDEE.

Calculators provide for great starting points..they aren't the be all end all gospel...you still have to make adjustments as per your real world results.