YOU have control

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  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
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    OP, this was an excellent point, and you are completely right. You are ALWAYS in control of what goes in your mouth. If someone here can tell me they've ever been force-fed chili fries at gunpoint, I will offer a sincere apology. Otherwise, people getting after you are just upset that you shed light on their inability to take up accountability and self-control. A stinging conscience will always bring out the offence in people. :flowerforyou:
  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,462 Member
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    I find this post incredibly crass. A loved one dying, or even a nasty divorce, are not equal to kids being annoying or a husband who brings home sweets. Think before you post.
    I never got the impression that she implied all of the above referenced situations were of equal importance. She just made a list of excuses people use to not eat well or exercise, not in any particular order. She also never implied that all were happening at once. I applaud you for putting words in her mouth though. /eyeroll

    Thanks for the eye roll. But I think someone posting a 'you have control' thread using extrene examples is ridiculous. I have read some of of OP's previous posts and am pretty sure she hasn't recently suffered a bereavement or a divorce. Mostly she posts about being mad that she can't eat what she likes at The Cheesecake Factory...Big issues.
    But hey, I eye roll you back for your 'impression' and white knighting of a person with no ability to think before she posts.
    I haven't read any of her previous posts, nor do I care to. My focus was you twisting her statement and attacking her for something she didn't imply. But go ahead, continue being an asshat.

    Wow. Are you old enough to be on this forum? I don't really care to engage with people like you, but next time you lose a loved one, or go through a divorce, let's see what you say when some Internet idiot tells you its no excuse for eating too much. And compares it to every day occurences. Clearly you are both a pair of lovely, emotive women. You should meet up.

    If you are being serious, you are overreacting.

    OP's point is clear - there are some things you can't control, big or small, and some things you can. Diet and exercise are two areas we have a lot more control over than others.
  • krawhitham
    krawhitham Posts: 831 Member
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    *eyeroll* try working at a job that doesn't allow lunch or breaks, and forces its employees to work long hours until exhaustion and then tell me I have no excuse. There *are* situations, abusive situations, that people find themselves in where the only variable is the situation NOT them. A nutritionist literally told me my weight gain and inability to lose weight was 100% because of my job, and that I'd lose all of it once I left my job. She was right.

    I'm not the only person I know who has been in an extremely abusive situation in life where their eating and exercising was NOT under their control until they were able to leave the dangerous/abusive situation.
  • JoshuaL86
    JoshuaL86 Posts: 403 Member
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    OP makes an excellent point! If all you make are excuses, all you will ever have are excuses, doesn't matter how legit those excuses are.
  • tequila09
    tequila09 Posts: 764 Member
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    Tequila what give you the right to be rude at someone else's opinion. Your immaturity was showing in your childish language.

    Funny how you're doing the same thing.

    I stand by what I said. Goodbye!
  • AllonsYtotheTardis
    AllonsYtotheTardis Posts: 16,947 Member
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    *eyeroll* try working at a job that doesn't allow lunch or breaks, and forces its employees to work long hours until exhaustion and then tell me I have no excuse. There *are* situations, abusive situations, that people find themselves in where the only variable is the situation NOT them. A nutritionist literally told me my weight gain and inability to lose weight was 100% because of my job, and that I'd lose all of it once I left my job. She was right.

    I'm not the only person I know who has been in an extremely abusive situation in life where their eating and exercising was NOT under their control until they were able to leave the dangerous/abusive situation.

    wait... so, your employer told you what you had to eat, and force fed it to you? And you didn't go to the police?
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
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    Oh wow. Try to post something supportive and you even get bashed for that. Jeeze. Some people on these forums just have no life (and like stalking me apparently). I mean, even less of a life than me I guess :laugh:

    don't worry about it. 6 months from now you'll feel great
  • IlluminatedMayhem
    IlluminatedMayhem Posts: 177
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    I don't feel like Googling at the moment but I once read a study that said some in some morbidly obese people, the self control center in the brain is by passed when it comes to food. And many morbidly obese people have lost the ability to know when they are full. Many morbidly obese people have an eating disorder.

    Yes, control can be regained but it is a huge struggle and requires addressing mental issues as well as diet and exercise.

    So, no, not everyone is ALWAYS in control.

    Also, to the previous poster, if my mom caught one of us eating something she didn't want us to, she would sit and make us eat the entire package. The biggest for me was when she made me eat an almost full package of 60 sandwich cookies. If we were too slow or gagged, she would beat us. This went on until I was 17. No, it wasn't gunpoint but it was pretty close and it didn't lead to a healthy relationship with food either.


    ETA: The OP was right for most people though.
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
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    *eyeroll* try working at a job that doesn't allow lunch or breaks, and forces its employees to work long hours until exhaustion and then tell me I have no excuse. There *are* situations, abusive situations, that people find themselves in where the only variable is the situation NOT them. A nutritionist literally told me my weight gain and inability to lose weight was 100% because of my job, and that I'd lose all of it once I left my job. She was right.

    I'm not the only person I know who has been in an extremely abusive situation in life where their eating and exercising was NOT under their control until they were able to leave the dangerous/abusive situation.

    Jobs are required by law to allow X time for X number of hours worked per shift. If you'd stood up to them and demanded a lunch break, legally they would have had to concede, with no threat to you of losing your job because of it. The fact that you didn't was your choice.

    Guess what else? That job was optional. Nobody was forcing you to remain employed there. So you are STILL always in control. ("But! But! But! It was the only job I could get/nobody else was hiring/excuses excuses, etc etc!", right?) You are always in control. Even people (adults, at least) in abusive situations have the power to leave. There are enough government assistance programs out there that that is a pretty weak-sauce excuse, as well. If you want something badly enough, you can make it happen. Always.
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
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    I don't feel like Googling at the moment but I once read a study that said some in some morbidly obese people, the self control center in the brain is by passed when it comes to food. And many morbidly obese people have lost the ability to know when they are full. Many morbidly obese people have an eating disorder.

    Yes, control can be regained but it is a huge struggle and requires addressing mental issues as well as diet and exercise.

    So, no, not everyone is ALWAYS in control.

    Also, to the previous poster, if my mom caught one of us eating something she didn't want us to, she would sit and make us eat the entire package. The biggest for me was when she made me eat an almost full package of 60 sandwich cookies. If we were too slow or gagged, she would beat us. This went on until I was 17. No, it wasn't gunpoint but it was pretty close and it didn't lead to a healthy relationship with food either.


    ETA: The OP was right for most people though.

    I am sorry you had to grow up like that. But you were children when that happened, as since this is an 18+ site, we are all adults out from under the thumb of Mommy and Daddy and are able to make our own choices. Once you are on your own, you now have the control to self-regulate, as hard as it can be sometimes.

    And yes you are right, there are people with hypothyroidism or defective satiety centers in the brain, but those people are still capable of regulating their food and eating at a deficit. I'm not saying no excuse is legitimate, but I AM saying there is a way around every excuse, and yes I do mean EVERY excuse. It's just a question of how hard you're willing to fight for it.
  • SkimFlatWhite68
    SkimFlatWhite68 Posts: 1,254 Member
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    OP, what you say is true, even if put in a way that some people couldn't quite get their heads around.

    I've had a lot of hardship in my life over the last 10 years, don't really feel the need to share all the details but it's been hard. At times, I treated food as my friend and confidant and my weight has yo-yoed up and down 40kg because of emotional and binge eating.

    Last year I got things under "control" by saying stop... To myself. I stopped plugging up all the empty holes of pain with food, and instead learnt to respect myself and began to think that I actually did deserve better. I started eating better, I went back to the gym (a hobby I have always loved) I took control of what I could - when there were so many things that I couldn't control.

    As a result, everything got better. I lost weight, I re-gained my self esteem and I found my confidence again. Some of life's little challenges are still there for me, but I cope with things much better at this end of the scale.

    It's true, we can choose the path that we want - we just have to want it badly enough and see the possibilities ahead, make a choice.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
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    *eyeroll* try working at a job that doesn't allow lunch or breaks, and forces its employees to work long hours until exhaustion and then tell me I have no excuse. There *are* situations, abusive situations, that people find themselves in where the only variable is the situation NOT them. A nutritionist literally told me my weight gain and inability to lose weight was 100% because of my job, and that I'd lose all of it once I left my job. She was right.

    I'm not the only person I know who has been in an extremely abusive situation in life where their eating and exercising was NOT under their control until they were able to leave the dangerous/abusive situation.

    I'm confused. In your former (current?) capacity as an indentured servant with no rights, shouldn't you have lost weight? I mean, no breaks, no lunch time, long hours and lots of stress seems like you would have been shedding fat right along with hair.

    Wait, or did you choose to eat huge portions of high calorie foods while choosing to not exercise your rights as an employee? Trick question, because it doesn't matter. Either way you made the choice, so stop blaming your job. Are you going to blame the OP for whatever you do after getting upset at her thread?
  • JoshuaL86
    JoshuaL86 Posts: 403 Member
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    With all the eye rolling going on in this thread, people are going to have their eyes stuck in the back of their heads. :)
  • IlluminatedMayhem
    IlluminatedMayhem Posts: 177
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    I know there is a way around every excuse but sometimes it takes time and effort. An anorexic isn't better overnight and neither is someone with the opposite challenges.

    I'll agree that there is no excuse for not regaining control. Yes, it can be very hard but it is worth it. I just wanted to point out that always is a very strong word and that there can be exceptions to every rule.

    I'm one of those people that completely lost control. I've regained it and I have to fight every day to keep it. Its one of the hardest things I've ever done and I could slip back into my old habits tomorrow if I don't watch it. I'll probably have to fight this battle for rest of my life. I still have my bad days but I think I'm doing ok.
  • Kamikazeflutterby
    Kamikazeflutterby Posts: 775 Member
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    Wait OP, you mean I'm responsible for what I eat and I can try and hold onto the small things for a big result when the rest of my life is going to hell?


    2013-04-30-21-12-05.jpg?w=600
  • LiftAllThePizzas
    LiftAllThePizzas Posts: 17,857 Member
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    I just wrapped my Cadillac around a tree. A big swarm of locusts is following me. There's not even anything good on TV. It's just one of those days.
  • HanamiDango
    HanamiDango Posts: 456 Member
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    I think this post is good, just the wording is a bit off. The whole "your eating and exercising is THE ONE THING that YOU can control" is a trigger for eating disorders. It is one of my triggers at that. When life gets stressful I either over eat or under eat, because it is what I control. (ETA: I am working on the balance and proper eating no matter what happens. Does not mean I do not fail at this as well) Also, not everyone can control exercise. There are things that can deter a person's exercise level, but they can watch how they eat still and manage within that range.

    Everyone has a responsibility to themselves to live up to their full potential. Remember, you are the one person who has the say on what goes into your mouth, just as much as you have a say in what style of life you want to live. Being your ideal person, look, does not fall into place. It requires work, hard work, and that work does not stop. No matter what life give you, you must make the most of it without any excuse. Do not give up on yourself, work hard, and become the person you want to be. Stick with that person too. This goes for food, exercise, your looks, and personality. No matter what hardship you may face, know that someone else faces it too, and they keep moving forward. When something wrong goes on, even if you make a mistake or excuse, remind yourself of who you are, who you want to be, pick yourself up and keep on walking.
  • getitamb
    getitamb Posts: 2,019 Member
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    *eyeroll* try working at a job that doesn't allow lunch or breaks, and forces its employees to work long hours until exhaustion and then tell me I have no excuse. There *are* situations, abusive situations, that people find themselves in where the only variable is the situation NOT them. A nutritionist literally told me my weight gain and inability to lose weight was 100% because of my job, and that I'd lose all of it once I left my job. She was right.

    I'm not the only person I know who has been in an extremely abusive situation in life where their eating and exercising was NOT under their control until they were able to leave the dangerous/abusive situation.









    You can workout before work and eat on the clock. Several small snacks in fact. U can also buy a pedometer, track your steps and make that your exercise. You don't get tomwalk around, walk in place. :) just suggestions
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
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    This thread sure went off the rails early.
  • stephanieluvspb
    stephanieluvspb Posts: 997 Member
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    OP i agree completely i just hate the word "excuses" i gained over 50 pounds in nursing school, i worked full time and was a full time student. I ate way to much vending machine food and fast food, i opted to get 5 hours of sleep and not exercise instead of 4 hours of sleep to exercise. I could of ate better, walked during lunch breaks, ect but i didn't. Its not an " excuse" its just the truth. Im not whining about it and blaming others. An excuse would be me sitting on the couch, overweight and whining about being fat, gaining weight is easy, taking it off is much harder.
    Ps: congrats on your weight loss!! I hope to be there soon one day :-)

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