Motivation Needed - Help!

One of the things that helps me (and I just did a few minutes ago) is planning out all of my food first thing in the morning. I'm in sales and travel all day in my car - if I don't have a plan it's WAY too easy to just stop and pick up something super unhealthy. Planning it all out in the morning gives me a sense of purpose and control. It also helps me accommodate "fun" later in my day. I know I'm going to my boyfriend's house tonight to cook out and watch the baseball game, and I know I'm going to want a couple glasses of wine - so I've already planned 10oz of wine into my day and adjusted my breakfast to make room for it.

I went a little crazy last night at sushi happy hour with one of my girlfriends and totally ruined all my hard work earlier in the day because I didn't plan. This morning it's just time to get back on the bandwagon and get back to it. Don't beat yourself up - it won't do you any good. Just reset your goals mentally and move on!

I agree with Robin above, plan your meals and plan when you go out to allow for wine etc. I also look at the restaurants menu online to pick a health low calorie meal. I have stopped having cheat days as I feel I put too much back on and one trainer said that they do not believe in cheat days just perhaps and extra 300 to 400 calories of something you fancy on a Sunday or Saturday. Some people on here work out extra hard to account for the extra calories they want. Calories in vs Calories out.

I will be happy to be your friend and you can look at my food diary too but keep yours open for friends to check in.

I know what you mean by once you have a "bad" day, you just let the rest of them go as well. I really have to make it a mental thing for me. I ask myself "Have I had this before? Do I really need it again? Will it make me regret it after? Can I hold off and/or replace it with something better? Do I really need this much of it?" I have a HUGE sweet tooth. I've been trying to fix that with fruit instead of chocolate. Most days it works, but maybe once or twice a week I'll indulge in a little treat. I started by cutting out nearly all soda and juice - way too much sugar for little benefit. I've had cake, brownies, cookies, etc...I tell myself I already know what they taste like, and eating more of it will not help me get any closer to my goal. I then started working on correct portion sizes. It's difficult and takes time. Sometimes I'm still hungry after. I just try to pack healthier snacks, and make as much of my own food as possible. But just like Robin below - don't beat yourself up. The more you tell yourself you have a goal, and ask yourself if what you're about to eat helps you achieve it or pushes you away from it, it becomes a lot easier!

Planning meals is key for me as well. That way, it's easier to stay on the budget. For example, it's my husband's turn to cook dinner tonight, so dinner may be a wild card today.

It's difficult to walk away, especially when you're hungry. I'm training for a triathlon, and my "rest days" (non training days) often fall after a weekend of long workouts where I never quite consume my calorie deficit. So I'm hungry as can be on my rest days, but I'm not allowed to eat. It's difficult to fight through it. You just have to be strong and realize that it takes a while to reprogram yourself.

I've read that it takes 21 days to make a habit. See if you can go 21 days without cheating. If you can do that, you will make your goal.

I am no expert, but I think you need to work out what it is that makes you cheat.

Do you cheat because you cannot be alienated from the eating habits of the rest of the family for too long because it causes friction?

Do you cheat because certain foods scream to be eaten (With me it is the smell of bacon cooking, or the thought of cheese on toast)?

Do you cheat because you work an anti-social shift pattern? I work nights, and at 2am there is part of me could pump the canteen chocolate machine with all the spare change I can find.

If you can find out what makes you cheat then you can work out a positive course of action to fight back, rather than feel overwhelmed by an inevitable tsunami of pressure.

I think motivation does not come from losing weight. Motivation is more about what made you want to lose weight in the first place. I am planning a visit to family next February/March, and want to be fitter and healthier in time to travel and meet them. This means I have a long term goal I can stick to, and so the minor day to day vicissitudes do not carry as much weight as they would if I only saw things day to day. If you can keep on the long term target, then things do not feel as stressful. In such cases the odd bad day does not matter, and weight-loss achieved is not so much a motivation as a short term gift to remind you the effort is worth it.

I hope this is helpful. Never forget that you are not alone.

I just try to eat the best that I can. I try to plan meals, but life has a way of getting in the way of those plans. I don't do cheat days anymore as I cant differentiate and then do like you said on and on for days. So I just log what I consume, and try to make good choices. I went out Saturday and consumed several alcoholic beverages. So I picked lighter versions, and ate a salad with my hotwings, and consumed the carrots and celery - and only ate half the amount of wings since I ate the salad and veggies. It was still calorie dense, but the better choices made it less of a hit...

I agree! You are not alone in this. I have had the same problems many times. Like others have said, planning is the key. We were on a very tight budget for the past year which forced me to plan every little thing I bought at the grocery store. I am hooked on Pinterest, so I started finding new healthy recipes to try each week. Before I knew it, I was couponing and planning all my meals to cook for the week to go shopping on Sunday. Now, I am trying to focus on making my breakfast at home and packing my lunches so I don't go overboard with the fast food. This week I cooked some chicken and made fresh salads for the whole week so now I have no excuse not to grab it from the fridge and take it to work for lunch. The other thing that helps me is not to make any food off limits. If I tell myself I can't have something, I will CRAVE IT! I brought my salad for today, but I also packed a snickers fun size candy bar as a little treat. Also, you can't beat yourself up too bad if you do have one of those fall off the wagon kind of days. I used to be really hard on myself for that. Now if I have a bad day I just make myself get on the treadmill and do some extra walking the next day.