Special Women's Classes being Offered

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RoadDog
RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
in Chit-Chat
WinterClasses for Women at
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
By Friday, Jan 21, 2011

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1
Up in Winter, Down in Summer - How to Adjust a Thermostat
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hrs beginning at 7:00 PM..

Class 2
Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or *****ing About It for 3 Hours?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Drive Past a Wal-Mart Without Stopping?--Group Debate.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between a Purse and a Suitcase--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
Curling Irons--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Bathroom Cabinet?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
At 7:00 PM

Class 6
How to Ask Questions During Commercials and Be Quiet During the Program
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Can a Bath Be Taken Without 14 Different Kinds of Soaps and Shampoos?
Open Forum.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch--They Make Medicine for PMS - USE IT!
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
I Was Wrong and He Was Right!--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. And my favorite Class 11
Learning to Live--How to Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through the Windshield .
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to Shop by Yourself.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
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Replies

  • fearlessfatty
    fearlessfatty Posts: 206 Member
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    hahaha- awesome! thanks for posting this!
  • Kate_UK
    Kate_UK Posts: 1,299 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Yleija
    Yleija Posts: 16
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    Lol!! That was great!
  • ZebraHead
    ZebraHead Posts: 15,207 Member
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    :drinker:
  • millerll
    millerll Posts: 873 Member
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    I'm returning my T-shirt...........:angry:

    :laugh:
  • immacookie
    immacookie Posts: 7,424 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh:

    Another version of this has a class on how to refill ice cube trays... THAT is the one I need.... :embarassed: :laugh:
  • Kityngirl
    Kityngirl Posts: 14,332 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh:

    Although I prefer to shop by myself, but could use a class on how to leave a store in less than one hour... :blushing:
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    Essentially empty offerings unless How to Iron and make Sandwiches class is a prerequisite. fosho.gif
  • qtwells82
    qtwells82 Posts: 352
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    :grumble:
  • ginnyroxx
    ginnyroxx Posts: 763
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    I have mastered 3, 4, 5 & 7
    The rest is up for discussion :laugh:
  • Gogo76
    Gogo76 Posts: 581
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    Also...........


    WINTER CLASSES FOR MEN
    AT THE
    "LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTS"
    REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY
    JANUARY 31, 2010

    NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
    OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.


    Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
    Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

    Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?
    Round Table Discussion.
    Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 p.m. for 2 hours.

    Class 3
    Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and
    Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? Group Practice.
    Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

    Class 4
    Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor
    Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
    Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

    Class 5
    After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
    Examples on Video.
    Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours
    beginning at 7:00 PM


    Class 6
    Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
    Help Line Support and Support Groups.
    Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM


    Class 7
    Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places and Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
    Open Forum.
    Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

    Class 8
    Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
    Graphics and Audio Tapes.
    Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.


    Class 9
    Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost.
    Real Life Testimonials.
    Tuesdays at 6:00 P.M. - Location to be determined.

    Class 10
    Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit
    Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
    Driving Simulations.
    4 weeks, Saturdays at noon, 2 hours.

    Class 11
    Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
    Online Classes and role-playing.
    Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined.

    Class 12
    How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion:
    Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
    Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

    Class 13
    How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries, Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
    Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
    Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.


    Class 14
    The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used.
    Live Demonstration.
    Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

    Upon completion of any of the above courses,
    diplomas will be issued to the survivors!
  • Kityngirl
    Kityngirl Posts: 14,332 Member
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    Class 7
    Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places and Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
    Open Forum.
    Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: YES!

    With a supplementary course on how to move things that are in front of what you're looking for...
  • TanMac
    TanMac Posts: 77
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    Love them both!!

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • chelekaz
    chelekaz Posts: 871 Member
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    That had to be the best thing that I've seen in awhile. And so true for so many women that I know... sorry girls; but you know a lot of that IS true. My only one that I fall victim to 99.9% of the time is shopping alone. I've been known to bribe a kid to go with me. (In my defense though I get anxious in crowds so the other person being with me gives me a safety net). As for the toilet seat - I have eyes, I can see where it is -- and being outnumbered 3 - 1 who am I to complain?!
  • immacookie
    immacookie Posts: 7,424 Member
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    Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
    Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

    Hey... there's my ice cube course! DH would like you to sign me up.... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
    Options
    Class 7
    Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places and Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
    Open Forum.
    Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: YES!

    With a supplementary course on how to move things that are in front of what you're looking for...
    Do I get extra credit for getting up and changing the station rather than searching for 2 hours for the remote?
  • Kityngirl
    Kityngirl Posts: 14,332 Member
    Options
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: YES!

    With a supplementary course on how to move things that are in front of what you're looking for...
    Do I get extra credit for getting up and changing the station rather than searching for 2 hours for the remote?
    Wait!?! It's possible to change the channel without a remote? :noway:
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
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    When I moved in with my wife, 21 years ago. There were 4 of us sharing 1 bathroom. (3 females and 1 male). Couple years later, Holland came along and the ratio changed again (4 to 1).

    You know how hard it was to train 4 females to return the toilet seat to the upright postion when they finished peeing? I give them credit. They learned.

    As they reached their teenage years though, I built a second bathroom. Just for me. With a huge walk in closet. Problem solved.

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