This can't be me?!

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"Losing weight is not your life's work, and counting calories is not the call of your soul. You surely are destined for something much greater, much bigger, than shedding 20 pounds or tallying calories.
What would happen if, instead of worrying about what you had for breakfast, you focused instead on becoming exquisitely comfortable with who you are as a person? Instead of scrutinizing yourself in the mirror, looking for every bump and bulge, you turned your gaze inward?" - Lisa Turner

Reading that just made me realize that this is what I've become, that's not to say I don't love losing that extra weight and being able to wear old clothes, learning to not use food to overcome boredom, shying away from activities because of my weight but its seems I'm now that person like it not but slowly I've somehow become that person who will rely on numbers to tell me how I should feel, If the scales not gone down that day I'll spend it the entire day over analyzing whats gone wrong. If I've gone over my calorie goal, sometimes I find myself throwing in the towel and overindulging since the numbers are messed up anyways. I hold of trying to swim or buying clothes because I'll do it when I'm at goal, when I hit that number one day. If I feel I've put on weight I decide not to dress up. Anyways long story short, did you think losing weight was going to be your answer to happiness for me I thought it was well most of it, after losing weight did you realize that it wasn't the weight holding you back after all?

Replies

  • oedipa_maas
    oedipa_maas Posts: 577 Member
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    What an insightful post. Yes, I definitely hung my happiness on my body. After yo-yo'ing for years and years, and discovering that I still had to work on my stuff no matter what I weighed, I now see things in a more clear-eyed way. Regaining my health and losing weight and learning to love exercising are all super important, I won't pretend otherwise. But if I don't learn how to cope with life's difficulties without hurting my body, it's all for nothing. I'll just keep regaining and losing over and over and over again.
  • Spreyton22K
    Spreyton22K Posts: 323 Member
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    I too have had experience with the difficulties that you speak of.....the holding back, the thought that I and the ensuing day are ONLY as GOOD/LOW as the numbers on the scale or the tape measure.

    Being aware of this is the first step in overcoming this issue. Some days are easier than others.....

    It can be a hard, difficult battle to find "Yourself.....Your TRUE self" in amongst the flotsam and jetsam of life. Let's face it as a species and living in this age we are RIVETED by appearance.

    May you find YOUR own space and place too.

    :heart:
  • SoLiveItUp
    SoLiveItUp Posts: 115 Member
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    Thank you guys, it's crazy how you can get lost in it all and so difficult to pull back into who you really are

    : )
  • Mar_11
    Mar_11 Posts: 35
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    But if I don't learn how to cope with life's difficulties without hurting my body, it's all for nothing. I'll just keep regaining and losing over and over and over again.

    THIS!! I SO needed this today after the last few weeks I've had! Every time I run in to "life's difficulties" I just hurt me in the end!

    Thank you!
  • apparations
    apparations Posts: 264 Member
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    This is so very true and one of the reasons why I never had any success until now. I have become very focused on overall wellness, mentally as well as physically. That being said it can be very easy to become obsessed with every calorie, every pound, every glance in the mirror. I have to admit that lately losing weight and calorie counting have been at the front of my mind ALL the time. There certainly is more to life than that. None of us will be magically "happy" after we lose the weight.