To join a gym or not

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I was thinking of joining a gym because I'd have more of a variety of fitness equipment to use, I always felt I lost a lot of inches using the elliptical and treadmill. But I don't have any friends who want to join with me and I am so self-conscious these days that I'm afraid to join alone. Worried about what all of the fit men and women at the gym will think of me. Well a male friend of mine kind of confirmed my fears without even realizing it. I noticed on his facebook status last weekend that he said something about being glad that all the big bodied new years newcomers were gone already, how they already gave up. And he was happy cause the gym was starting to look like the casting for the biggest loser.

I didn't confront him about it because it wasn't directed towards me, I don't think he even knows I want to join a gym. But it made me think that everyone at the gym would think I was just another new years resolution newcomer who would give up in a couple weeks. It made me start thinking of what he really thinks of me and then made me even more worried to join the gym on my own too.

So is it better to join the gym or do the jillian michaels & biggest loser dvd's I already have, plus I have the wii fit, and an elliptical (which can be rough on the knees since it's not a gym quality eliptical) I want to stay motivated and keep exercising so I'm not sure which routine is better.
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Replies

  • sweebum
    sweebum Posts: 1,060 Member
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    The exercise that's better? The one that you will actually DO. :smile:

    If you can do it at home- go for it! It's more convenient. Some people require the structure and motivation of a gym to actually do it. Only you can answer that.:flowerforyou:

    I have a huge variety of fitness DVD's, an elliptical and weights to keep me guessing. It works because I make it work. Try Kettlebells too, compact and gets your cardio and strength in - in about half the time.

    Whatever you do-keep going!:bigsmile:
  • sh3lby03
    sh3lby03 Posts: 193 Member
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    You shouldn't worry what anyone else thinks at a gym, everyone is there to accomplish a different goal. Before you join, this is what I always do, i see how long I can stick with a work-out regime at home, if I am consistant I know I can be consistant at a gym. Given that you have friends that are willing to join with you i think it would be a great idea since you will have your own support network there.
  • pinecone
    pinecone Posts: 28 Member
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    The gym is a really male-centred place and can be really intimidating. I can see why lots of women choose not to go. Despite this, and the assortment of dirty, judgemental, patronising and pervy I get, I really like the gym. At first I always went with a friend, but I don't really mind now. I just go to do my exercises and leave. If anyone thinks anything about me sweating like a pig, so what? That's a hard state of mind to achieve, but really, why should men (or gym bunnies) get away with that sort of attitude?

    If you really want to go to the gym and are nervous about what people are going to think, recognise that motivation to exercise is a precious thing.

    Or, rant aside, join a female gym.

    Good luck xx
  • VegasJellyFish
    VegasJellyFish Posts: 12 Member
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    I say join if you want to. If you can go during the day. I know that is when moms usually go to the one around where I live and there is less muscle people there. Maybe you will make a friend there and have a buddy to work out with.

    *I myself would have called out your friend on the comment he made. Even if you weren't trying to lose weight or join a gym he shouldn't have said what he did. He is the reason alot of people don't like going to the gym. They worry about people like him making comments. I can see why you it would make you nervous to go.
  • MaryTheIceCube
    MaryTheIceCube Posts: 1,099 Member
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    The exercise that's better? The one that you will actually DO. :smile:

    If you can do it at home- go for it! It's more convenient. Some people require the structure and motivation of a gym to actually do it. Only you can answer that.:flowerforyou:

    I have a huge variety of fitness DVD's, an elliptical and weights to keep me guessing. It works because I make it work. Try Kettlebells too, compact and gets your cardio and strength in - in about half the time.

    Whatever you do-keep going!:bigsmile:

    I wholeheartedly agree with this response. Best wishes! :)
  • jenready
    jenready Posts: 2,658 Member
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    I have had the same thoughts cross my mind many times. It is hard and I know just what those thoughts can do to you mentally. I find that for now I am more comfortable exercising at home. Eventually I may join a gym but for now, no. There are so many different DVD's and workouts available on the internet that I can find something to do at home. Good luck with your decision. Don't let your friend's post get you down.
  • ChristyDPierce
    ChristyDPierce Posts: 36 Member
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    If you are like me, i don't have the money to tie into a gym.....i was a member of a gym, but what sucks, if you don't use it...you are just wasting money.........check with your employer, they may have a gym at work you can use.....i have started going and working out during lunch at our gym, and then also doing workout videos at home........but.....it is totally left up to you.....the gyms usually make you sign a year contract.....and if you break it, you have to pay more money.......if you have a friend that can go with you that helps...........PSHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, ignore that idiot on facebook................at least those people are TRYING to lose weight........don't let yourself feel like everyone is watching you when you go to the gym...most of them are WAY too involved in their own workouts to be looking at you....just think how HOTT you are going to look when done :D People like that make me SICK! I am the confronting type, even tho it wasn't directed towards me, i would have still taken it personally........just ignore him....do what YOU want to do.....if you are not comfortable in a gym or around other people and working out, then just keep doing what you are doing at home until you feel more comfortable.....I AM PROUD OF YOU! KEEP UP THE HARD WORK AND IT WILL PAY OFF :D
    Add me as a friend if you want too :D
  • VegasJellyFish
    VegasJellyFish Posts: 12 Member
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    I just thought about it, but you should check in your area to see if there are gyms that have women only areas. I know that Las Vegas Athletic Club had those in Vegas and some other gyms offer that. You can also check for women only gyms all together.
  • BriannaSkye
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    Go to the gym, It took me a bit to build up the courage and im so glad that I did. Yes its full of skinny people but most of them have a story to. When you start talking to them guess what? They started where we did, big and overweight. granted there are also alot of people that were slim to begin with but its really a mix when you start talking. Ive had nothing but positive convo's at the gym and havent felt uncomfortable at all. I like 24hr gym. Something they dont really advertise is they have an up front membership for only $200 the only catch is you can only use that one gym location otherwise its $30 am onth and yuo get access to them all.
  • shannamae
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    Hey pal! If you want to join a gym, don't let your fear of what other people think or what you think they think, get in your way!!! Odds are most people might think you are wanting to better you health and your life. And that's what you are doing, right?!! I used the think the same way as you do, I didn't want to go alone, but I did! It had to be done! I use the Biggest Loser workouts myself and the same thing every day does get old and if I wasn't a stay at home mom with two little ones, I would join a gym. You make the most with what you have, you have the opportunity to join a gym, then do it! I promise, you will be glad you did!!! Good Luck!
  • Ashia1317
    Ashia1317 Posts: 415
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    O man! I totally hear you. Gym's can be soo intimidating - male or females who sit and watch you and want to tell you what you are doing wrong and you should do it their way. That's what I hate. - Or looking like a dork waiting for the piece of equipment you want. I've been contemplating joining as well. There's one that just opened near me and I'd like to join the classes if anything. See if you can find one that has classes that you'd be interested - that way a GROUP of you can support each other. Or find better "off-peak" times where it's not so busy and you can be more relaxed.

    If you do go, plug your headphones in your ear and just go!! Your goal is for yourself, not the meatheads that are looking tough. DO YOU GIRL!! :flowerforyou:
  • maaalloryy
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    Why not show the fit people at the gym that you're not going to just give up in a couple of weeks? Most of them weren't fit when they started, so prove to them (& yourself!) that you can do it. Don't let them intimidate you.

    When I first joined the gym, I was terrified to work out in the weight room because I was worried about what all the muscular men would think about this overweight girl trying to lift weights. But I soon realized that I shouldn't worry about what they think of me. I was just as much a member of the gym as they were. They didn't own the weights! So I went into the weight room & did my workout. Turns out, I was getting inside my own head & psyching myself out.

    So, if you want to get in a good quality workout at the gym, go for it! Don't let anyone hold you back!

    I do both types of workouts, just to keep it different! I go to the gym some days, then other days I just do videos at home.

    I think the gym is incredibly motivating because, when you take away the super fit people, you're left with people who are just like you, who have weight loss goals and want to get in shape. You may not think so, but they're probably just as nervous as you are.

    Go for it!
  • MissingMinnesota
    MissingMinnesota Posts: 7,486 Member
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    Try out different gyms first before you decide on which one to join or if you you would prefer doing it at home. Most have a free 7 day trail and you can get a good feel for the gym during that period. I love my gym and even at my heaviest weight I never thought people were looking at me. Most people concentrate on themselves more then anyone else on the gym anyway.
  • maaalloryy
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    O man! I totally hear you. Gym's can be soo intimidating - male or females who sit and watch you and want to tell you what you are doing wrong and you should do it their way. That's what I hate. - Or looking like a dork waiting for the piece of equipment you want. I've been contemplating joining as well. There's one that just opened near me and I'd like to join the classes if anything. See if you can find one that has classes that you'd be interested - that way a GROUP of you can support each other. Or find better "off-peak" times where it's not so busy and you can be more relaxed.

    If you do go, plug your headphones in your ear and just go!! Your goal is for yourself, not the meatheads that are looking tough. DO YOU GIRL!! :flowerforyou:

    Exactly! Classes are a great way to get involved in the gym. They're a great workout, and theres a bunch of people doing the same thing that you are! I've made a bunch of friends in my classes. It's a great motivator!
  • Jerzeeblondie
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    Thanks everyone. It's definitely tough to join a gym alone when I'm worried about what everyone else is thinking. If I could just get those thoughts out of my head I'd be better off. Everyone always told me that people at a gym weren't going to pay attention to me and they would be busy with their own workouts. I started to believe they were right until I saw his comment, which made me worry again. And of course the only all female gym is like an hour away, which would definitely make me lose motivation.
    The gym I want to join is pretty close and has a special price for the next few days, so I have to decide soon. It's open 24 hours during the week, with special hours on the weekend. Doesn't offer any classes, but has all of the equipment I'd need. I'm still unsure if I want to join it or workout at home until I get bored with what I have. Being I'm in the process of looking for a new full-time job I can't guarantee I'd be able to go the same hours all the time, so basing my decision on just going during the day when most men are working wouldn't be a good idea. I could end up with a job that'd have me going the same time as the rest of them.
  • beadsiam
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    You know, I have never posted a reply before but this struck a chord with me. About 6 months ago i started my weight loss journey and i was feeling very insecure about myself and scared to death to go to the gym alone. It literally made me sick to my stomach to think of going alone. BUT...I forced myself to go. I only had to force myself a couple of times, and after that i actually looked forward to it. I just knew everyone would be looking at me, making comments and pointing fun at me...but you know, I don't think that happens so much anymore. There is such a wide varity of people at the gym, and they seem to be there for different reasons. I don't think anyone ever really noticed i was there at all. And i have to tell you that secretly, the compitition helps keep me motivated. I will go in and see someone around my size and think i can do that. I can go faster or lift more than they are. I loved to watch all of the people, and found it very easy to not judge anyone. You see people doing things you want to be able to do, so it motivates, you see people who aren't as far along as you, and it motivates because you know you used to be there. I leave almost every time i go a swetty pig...but i always feel great!.I hope this helps you to decide,because for myself, if i had to work out at home i would be so bored!
  • Loki182
    Loki182 Posts: 31
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    Well for me and my wife there was one main motivating factor for us joining a gym... Childcare. Do we have time to work out at home? Probably. Is it easy while dodging a toddler or feeding an infant... not so much. save for the times I am working out with my son.. or as I affectionately call him my 35lb dumbell. Also my wife has found when she goes alone it is much easier for her to go during the late morning since it seems that there more moms and less judgemental eyeballs.

    Personally I have much better motivation to work out when I go to the gym verses trying to exercise at home. When I am there I just feel purposeful like I am on a mission.
  • patricac
    patricac Posts: 255 Member
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    I felt the same way as you about joining a gym. I moved to a new City, I didn't know anyone, so there was no one to recruit to join a gym with me. I'd either have to do it alone or not do it at all. At first, I focused on DVD's and worked out at home. But eventually I decided to join the gym, it was way to easy for me to skip out on a DVD exercise. Plus, my gym is right up the street from my house!

    I was VERY paranoid at first, I won't lie. I was the biggest girl in the gym at times & felt that all the skinny folks noticed. I was so focused on everyone else, that I didn't go all out on my workouts - afraid I was going to look stupid, that they would laugh, etc. Since I was so focused on looking silly, I wasn't getting the results that I wanted from the workout.

    Eventually, I had to get passed my hesitation and paranoia. The decision to get healthy is about you... not what other people think about you. Your workout is what *you* make of it. If you are focused on everyone else, you're not going to get the best workout that you can get. Once I started focusing on myself, on my efforts - I started getting really good results. And eventually I stopped caring what the *fit* guys/gals thought. I'm not at the gym for them, I'm there for me. And eventually, I want to be one of those "fit" people at the gym... who knows, maybe they were like me back in the day? (:
  • kiannlouise
    kiannlouise Posts: 310 Member
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    Do it !!!!
    Dont even pay any attention to what your friend has said.... 1- he wouldnt have aimed it at any of his friends and 2- just like you said he probably doesn't even know you want to join a gym! Afterall if he is that athletic maybe you could use him as your own personal trainer :)

    I've recently moved and joined an amazing gym! Maybe have a look around your area and if you can- join a gym where you dont know many people.... Gyms are great anyway! you'll get to know the staff and everyone that goes. classes are the best workout!
  • VegasJellyFish
    VegasJellyFish Posts: 12 Member
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    Thanks everyone. It's definitely tough to join a gym alone when I'm worried about what everyone else is thinking. If I could just get those thoughts out of my head I'd be better off. Everyone always told me that people at a gym weren't going to pay attention to me and they would be busy with their own workouts. I started to believe they were right until I saw his comment, which made me worry again. And of course the only all female gym is like an hour away, which would definitely make me lose motivation.
    The gym I want to join is pretty close and has a special price for the next few days, so I have to decide soon. It's open 24 hours during the week, with special hours on the weekend. Doesn't offer any classes, but has all of the equipment I'd need. I'm still unsure if I want to join it or workout at home until I get bored with what I have. Being I'm in the process of looking for a new full-time job I can't guarantee I'd be able to go the same hours all the time, so basing my decision on just going during the day when most men are working wouldn't be a good idea. I could end up with a job that'd have me going the same time as the rest of them.

    If it is 24 hrs then you can go at night and not worry either. My ex and I used to go at night to the 24 hr fitness and there was hardly anyone there. Most people go right before work or after. Good luck