Is it rude?

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dnmoehring
dnmoehring Posts: 64 Member
in Motivation and Support
I originally didn't have much planned for the 4th, seeing as I'm several hundreds of miles away from my family, and my husband's family wasn't sure if they would do anything. All of this I was happy about because I've been finally seeing some progression in my weight and I don't want to sabotage myself.
But! Last night I found out we are officially going over to his parents' house for the holiday. And in the nicest way possible, his family eats very poorly and have always been enablers for me. Junk food everywhere.

SO. Is it rude for me to bring my own packaged lunch? I'll surely get made fun of, but I don't want to ruin my progress, or kill my motivation. I thought of maybe bringing some dishes to the get together, but frankly no one would eat what I would bring. I just don't have many healthy options when I get there.
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Replies

  • emilyGPK
    emilyGPK Posts: 83 Member
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    I don't think it's rude, but it might come across better if you make enough to share.
  • glassgallm
    glassgallm Posts: 276 Member
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    Bring it if you can't find a way to eat what they offer. There are more important things about getting together with family than what you eat. Enjoy the visit, and the catching up with family. You are responsible for what you put in your mouth, it is not up to anyone else.
  • crystalbluewolf13
    crystalbluewolf13 Posts: 197 Member
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    Is there no way of having a smaller portion or working it into your weekly calories? I have the same problem when i visit family. They don't put weight on so eat whatever they want, whereas i have to be really careful. I normally end up working it into my calories or just having a cheat weekend and dealing with it afterwards. Can you speak to your husband about it at all?
  • fullersun35
    fullersun35 Posts: 162 Member
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    I would bring something to share with the group. You can always bring the leftovers back home and use it as your lunches for the next week.
  • GiveMeCoffee
    GiveMeCoffee Posts: 3,556 Member
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    Yes I think going to someone's BBQ on a holiday and bringing your own food and enough for just you is rude.

    I would bring a dish to share, and then eat all the good food. It's a holiday and you are celebrating it with family, enjoy it. It's one day and will not ruin any progress.
  • jlahorn
    jlahorn Posts: 377 Member
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    Bringing your own food just for you would be a little rude, but so is a host who doesn't try to make his guests comfortable. If you know they won't accommmodate you by providing healthy options, and you know that they're open to having other people bring dishes to share (bringing dishes to a meal that's not a potluck can be rude, too), then bring food to share even if you know you're the only person who will eat it. You never know; maybe someone else will want a healthier option, too.

    If none of this feels comfortable, then eat healthily before you go and eat what they serve, but in small portions.
  • StraubreyR
    StraubreyR Posts: 631 Member
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    I agree that you should bring a dish to share. Eat more of that, and small portions of the other stuff.
  • burtnyks
    burtnyks Posts: 124 Member
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    I did the same thing.....but for a weekend trip. Although in my case I left room for dinner with my friends, but ate my packed food the rest of the trip. I too was worried about being made fun of, but luckily my friends were supportive and had no issue with it. Maybe bring your food and a veggie tray to share. Even people that aren't into super healthy eating will nibble on veggies I've found. I usually make a dip with greek yogurt and hidden valley ranch seasoning. Most people think its sour cream anyhow and have no idea its yogurt!
  • MdmAcolyte
    MdmAcolyte Posts: 382 Member
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    I completely agree with the 'bring a big dish to share' philosophy. And whatever is not consumed, take home to revamp for lunch the next week or whatever. There are plenty of 'side dishes' you can make a meal out of, or just go for the standard 'chicken caesar salad' side dish and double it. Who knows? You might bring something SOMEONE ELSE there would appreciate having as an alternative. :) Good luck!
  • blueboxgeek
    blueboxgeek Posts: 574 Member
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    Personally I would bring a dish with enough to share if I was sure there was not going to be suitable food for me. You can always take it home if no one else has any.
  • Serah87
    Serah87 Posts: 5,481 Member
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    I agree with everyone else. Bring enough for everyone!! Enjoy!! 1 day won't kill your weight loss!! :wink:
  • Kitten2629
    Kitten2629 Posts: 1,359 Member
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    Simply make a dish that you can share with everyone. If they don't eat it, yayyy you've got lunch the rest of the week :)
  • lynn1982
    lynn1982 Posts: 1,439 Member
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    Yup. It's very rude. As others have said, bring a dish to share with everyone. Do you not normally bring something when you go to someone else's for a meal anyway?? If I were you, I'd bring a side dish AND a healthy dessert to contribute to the meal that I could eat. And then have a bit of what is there too, knowing that you're also eating healthy. One meal with a little bit of something higher in calories is not going to sabotage you.
  • amyhoss
    amyhoss Posts: 414 Member
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    Make a seven layer salad or a veggie/fruit tray. That way it looks like you are contributing and you'll have something to eat. Who cares if anyone else eats it or not? At least they have the option.

    To answer your question, I don't think it is rude but I think my suggestion above would give you less hassle.
  • thebigcb
    thebigcb Posts: 2,210 Member
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    Yeah it is rude

    And its only one day, it will not kill you
  • beanrider
    beanrider Posts: 66 Member
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    I agree with the "share with the group" thought. Last BBQ I attended, I took turkey burgers for the grill and a giant bowl of fruit salad. No one else ate the turkey burgers, but I had a healthier option and the fruit was a big hit. I sampled a few small bites of some the the less healthy options and no one thought a thing about my meal choices. Good Luck.
  • marchellaz
    marchellaz Posts: 70 Member
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    Bring a fruit salad. Then put a little bit of something his family made on your plate and compliment it.
  • brc912
    brc912 Posts: 43 Member
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    I usually take a vegetable/fruit tray to any potluck to make sure I have something healthy to eat. I have also found that when I take a bag of baked chips or Kellogs cracker chips, they are usually the first thing gone. People want to eat healthy when it is available to them... If they don't have the option they will gorge on the unhealthy options. Take a couple healthy options that you enjoy, and eat a little of both yours and theirs.
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
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    Nope. My family knows my prep plans and my dietary restrictions right now, and know I'll be bringing my own food. Even if it did hurt their feelings, it would change my plans not in the slightest. I'm not sacrificing my goals just to make other people happy. I figure anyone petty enough to be offended that I'm not eating the same food as them have more problems than I want to buy into. :drinker:
  • RozayJones
    RozayJones Posts: 409 Member
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    Rude no - odd yes.....

    My plan is to workout and eat before I go to the planned 4th of July BBQ - no one will notice me not eating but they would def. notice if I brought my own food.

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