Trying and not losing, BF not trying and losing

NewGirlThatsMe
NewGirlThatsMe Posts: 124 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
So in the amount of time of losing 6 and gaining back 3 since I started working out again, the life partner has lost 14 lbs. and I saw him eat 2 burgers last night and potato salad and drink a liter of Pepsi.....I want to smother him with a pillow.

Has anyone else gone through this? When the people around you start losing weight because you suggest a healthy lifestyle and they do it half assed but seem to be doing leaps and bounds better than you?

GRRRRRR.

Replies

  • segovm
    segovm Posts: 512 Member
    He probably just burns more calories than you or eats less throughout the day. My wife sees me eat every night but doesn't see what I don't eat or the exercise I get throughout the day. Plus the bigger you are the easier it is to lose so if he's a big guy he can eat more than you and still lose weight, just the way things go.
  • BeginningAgainMay14
    BeginningAgainMay14 Posts: 97 Member
    Men have a greater lean body mass than we do and can often eat more, plus if he weighs more than you already it's going to be easier for him to lose it. Also, our hormones often skew the progress on the scale once a month. It''s hard though. Someone I am very close to loses weight without meaning to and then has to try to gain it back. I love him, but sometimes I think "just ONCE I would like to know what it feels like to lose weight without trying."

    It's frustrating going head to head, just remember that you have lost 3 lbs and added activity to your life. You're doing really great.
  • editorgrrl
    editorgrrl Posts: 7,060 Member
    Weight loss is like yoga. Don't compare yourself to anyone else, just do better today than you did yesterday or last week.

    The Sexypants post should be required reading: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants
  • AshleeBoruff
    AshleeBoruff Posts: 10 Member
    Also you should take your measurements and look at those, not just pounds! My hubby can lose 20lbs in a month and me nothing so I know how you feel. Men are very different, plus we are all so differently made up.
  • itsbasschick
    itsbasschick Posts: 1,584 Member
    my husband is 6' 7" and is way into bike riding, so he can eat pretty much whatever he wants including a lot of snacking. i'm just over 5' 3", and not only am low on lean body mass but am not in great condition - i eat 1200 net calories per day and lose a pound a week, he eats maintenance at about 2600 on non-bike riding days and 2800 to 3000 on bike riding days.
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    Worry about yourself only and your problem will go away
  • gypsy_spirit
    gypsy_spirit Posts: 2,107 Member
    Woman, meet man.
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    I know, it's going to be hard to hear this, but ya gotta take it to heart:

    Worry about you. His needs for his body are different. I completely understand that it's frustrating, but you can't compare yourself to him or what he eats. It won't help you or make you feel better. Eat what contributes to you goals and makes you feel good and satisfied.

    It's an unfair fight in the calorie department, but being a lady is pretty awesome otherwise, so I guess we can give them this one thing. ;)
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • jessay11
    jessay11 Posts: 1
    My husband is large also but he is having a harder time losing weight! Any suggestions on what he can do. He goes walking, he only drinks water, we eat clean. He's working on portion control. I assumed that he would drop faster than me but that is not the case. Please help becuase he is super discouraged.
  • tuckeychicken
    tuckeychicken Posts: 167 Member
    So in the amount of time of losing 6 and gaining back 3 since I started working out again, the life partner has lost 14 lbs. and I saw him eat 2 burgers last night and potato salad and drink a liter of Pepsi.....I want to smother him with a pillow.

    Has anyone else gone through this? When the people around you start losing weight because you suggest a healthy lifestyle and they do it half assed but seem to be doing leaps and bounds better than you?

    GRRRRRR.
    Oh it's like you have my life. My husband and sometimes he really does a poor half *kitten* job at that and still he loses. He always finishes everyone elses food and he still weighs about 10 less then me, but I'm getting closer or so I think he'll just lose another 10lbs he he he. One time I felt so good because I finally lost around 15lbs and I was the weight that my husband was so I asked him to weigh himself and he had lost 22lbs. :grumble: Yes I know how this feels it's irritating to say the least.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    "Do better than you"

    Troubling mindset you have there. Is the rate of loss really your only measure of success?
  • gypsy_spirit
    gypsy_spirit Posts: 2,107 Member

    When the people around you start losing weight because you suggest a healthy lifestyle and they do it half assed but seem to be doing leaps and bounds better than you?

    GRRRRRR.

    Step up your game. If you think he's doing it half assed and losing - he's doing something right. Decide on your goals, develop a healthy plan and then put it into practice. All this chatter is unproductive to what you say you want.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
    Yes, my BF and I can literally eat the same things for days on end, both under calorie restriction, both exercising together, and he'll drop about a pound a day, while me nothing.

    It is far more challenging for women to lose weight than men because our bodies are designed to retain fat.

    Just keep at it.

    If you can lose anything vs. nothing, you've done far better than me in the last 7 months.
  • baba_helly
    baba_helly Posts: 810 Member
    He'll gain inches as he loses so I would consider that a positive.

    Also, I don't know if I would announce on the Internet that I was going to smother my bf with a pillow. He might see it and stop sleeping with me.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    He'll gain inches as he loses so I would consider that a positive.

    Also, I don't know if I would announce on the Internet that I was going to smother my bf with a pillow. He might see it and stop sleeping with me.
    winky.gif
  • Escloflowne
    Escloflowne Posts: 2,038 Member
    He'll gain inches as he loses so I would consider that a positive.

    Also, I don't know if I would announce on the Internet that I was going to smother my bf with a pillow. He might see it and stop sleeping with me.

    The first part is actually accurate!!!
  • Michelle8683
    Michelle8683 Posts: 64
    Men and women typically lose weight at different rates because of physiological disparities. Men’s bodies are usually bigger and contain more muscle, and they tend to burn fat quicker due to these factors. Although a woman cannot change her body enough to burn calories equal to those burned by a man, she can encourage her metabolism by increasing muscle mass.
  • WBB55
    WBB55 Posts: 4,131 Member
    If you're in a competition, it's probably better to look at % of total body weight lost. What were you all's starting weights?
  • racheldeherrera
    racheldeherrera Posts: 12 Member
    yup, my boyfriend can pretty much drop weight very easily. I on the other hand must slave over calories and constantly move. Life ain't fair, but oh well. Suck it up and just focus on your own progress. Comparing yourself will only just frustrate you.
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
    FACT. It's just how it goes. You can either stay pissed and be consumed by nasty angry feelings. Or, you can focus on you and celebrate with him when you both reach your goals. One of these routes is a lot less stressful and frustrating than the others.

    Your choice, OP.

Categories