1 Year, 45 Pounds! 32, PCOS, Mastectomy, Lifestyle Change

Today marks one year since my weight loss journey began. I gained the weight slowly over a 12 year period, from my low in college in 2002. The most dramatic increases happened in the last 6 years with a PCOS diagnosis, fertility treatment, two pregnancies, and just letting myself go. I thought weight loss was too hard; I gave a half-hearted try a couple times with little to no success.

In July of 2012 I was tested and found to be positive for the BRCA2 breast/ovarian cancer gene mutation. The specific strain I carry has an 82% incidence of breast cancer, as I have observed in the females of my family dating back 3 generations, so I knew I wanted to have a preventive mastectomy. I started visiting with surgeons and eventually settled on a July 9, 2013 surgery. I woke up from that surgery a changed person. I was going to change my life, change my body, and claim the body I’ve always wanted. I spent a week in the hospital and fought for every ounce of my recovery. I was diligent and walked every day, as it was all my doctor allowed me to do. By 4 weeks out I was walking 2 miles per day, and by 6 weeks, 3 miles daily. I was cleared to run again at 6 weeks and started back up, taking it slow. I also began regularly tracking my calories on Myfitnesspal at that time.

Summer turned into Fall and I joined a morning boot camp class. Abdominal and chest exercise was difficult because of the muscle trauma from the mastectomy, but I took them at my own pace and slowly built my strength. I kept running on the days I didn’t have boot camp, and 5 months after my surgery I ran a half marathon, shaving 16 minutes off my personal record. The pounds kept slowly melting off at a nice healthy pace around 1-1.5 pounds per week. In March 2014 I hit my initial goal of 40 pounds. I realized that my lifestyle truly had changed, and I didn’t feel like I was dieting anymore. It was my new normal. I decided to keep going, see where I could get. I changed my focus from all cardio all the time to heavy weight lifting to start building muscle and tone up what I have. 3-5 more pounds have come off, and I’m pretty happy where I am now at 135-6. The OCD side of me would like to hit an even 50 pounds, but I also know that while I am building muscle that might not happen. At this point the number is somewhat irrelevant because body changes are still happening. I had one last revision surgery 5 weeks ago, and am still in that holding pattern of light exercise only. 1 more week and I can go hardcore again. (I’m up a pound or two since surgery, but I know it’ll come right back off!)

I just can’t say how happy I am. I’ve never been this size before. The smallest I can ever remember being in high school is a size 6, and now I’m a 4. I’m smaller than when I got married. And I feel this is absolutely sustainable. I measured every portion and serving size to make sure I wasn’t estimating. But I rarely wanted to binge because I was still getting all my favorites. I ate 1200 calories per day and only ate back my exercise calories if I was desperate, always trying to leave some calories on the table. I gave myself a little more leeway on weekends to eat those exercise calories, but did my best to be very strict during the week. I don’t deprive myself of anything – that’s when I feel like rebelling. I still eat pizza, fast food, desserts, etc. I just BUDGET THEM IN to my calorie allowance, and eat smaller portions of them. I keep my calorie goal set on 1200 calories per day, so that way even when I had a “bad” day and exceeded 1200, there was still a nice calorie deficit there and I hadn’t really done any damage. I’m the type of person where if I’m “allowed” to eat 1400-1500 calories, you can bet I’m going to eat my way all the way up to that allowance. So it’s just sort of a mind game for me. Exceeding 1200 is a lot less damaging than exceeding 1500. And of course I had my bad days/weeks. The key is to hop right back on the train. A couple days of making poor food choices isn’t going to ruin your progress. Even if the scale appears that you have gained several pounds, don’t give up thinking you’ve ruined it anyway... give it a few days of discipline and you’ll be surprised how quickly they come right back off.

In the end, you just have to WANT it. I don’t know how else to describe it. You WILL feel hungry – your will power has to be stronger than your hunger. Lots of gum. The first ~20 pounds are the hardest. You’re working so hard, but your appearance isn’t all that different. After that point, you can really see the changes and it makes it a whole lot easier to stick with it. If I can do it, you can do it!

Starting weight: 179, Pants size: 14, Top size: XL
Current weight: 135, Pants size: 4, Top size: S