Maintenance =/= Promised Land: Advice for new maintainers.

I read a lot of posts from people who are nervous about starting maintenance. Oh boy, can I relate. I was totally nervous and for good reason - we worked really hard to get here and it seems like so many people work so hard to lose all this weight then gain it right back within a frighteningly short period of time. What will follow is just a story of how I learned how to stop being scared of maintenance. I really hope that it helps or reassures anyone who wants to take the time to read it. It is pretty long, but I thought I'd put it out there because reading something like this would have helped me when I was nervous about approaching maintenance. I know everyone is different, but sharing experiences can be really helpful.

I'm sure it's a common story - start tracking calories, feel pleasantly surprised by how doable weight loss is after you've adjusted to eating a smaller amount of food and making smarter nutritional choices. Still, for me, there were often times where I felt hungrier than I wanted to but had used up all of my calories, or wanted some kind of snack (like trail mix) but opted for something less exciting because it wasn't practical - it wouldn't curb my hunger enough to make it worth the calories. The results I was seeing made these feelings easy to brush off, but I would often find myself thinking "I can't wait to get to maintenance, then I can have that" or "I can't wait till I hit my goal then I don't have to think about this all the time".

This mentality, I am pretty sure, is the reason that my first couple of brushes with maintenance were short, sweet, and complete excersizes in failure. Weight loss was not unpleasant for me, but I was stuck with this mindset that maintaining would be some sort of magical experience filled with rainbows and zuchinni bread and peanut butter toast for every snack! I have never been too unhealthy an eater, I just have a tendency to over-snack and not very good portion control. The first time I hit maintenance I thought "I'M FREE!" and just ate way too much. So I gained a bit and got back on a deficit and hit maintenance again. This time I was more careful about portion control, but I ended up eating the same amount of calories in meals as I had been during my deficit and just filling all the rest up with chocolate and alcohol. I felt hungry and cranky all the time and the fact that I felt like being in maintenance meant I should not be feeling this way made me even more cranky. I gained a bit of weight back, probably glycogen, and went back on a deficit.

I waited until I was about two pounds under my goal, and with a sigh I started to mentally prepare myself. But this time, because of my experiences so far, I was no longer thinking of maintenance as a promised land, as the oasis at the end of a long crawl through a desert where everything would be better and different. People say around here a lot that this isn't a diet, it is a lifestyle change. That is the truth. And it's funny how easy it is to say and agree with, but how hard it is to truly believe right down to your core. When I finally realized that, maintenance didn't disappoint me, it simply became part of the process. I also chose to begin upping my calories by 100 per week rather than jumping right to what mfp dictates for maintenance. That was also really helpful in the sense that it reinforced the process mentality rather than "Yay I'm done, let's order some chinese food and cupcakes!"

I am still looking for my true maintenance calories. I still consume a lot of chocolate and alcohol. I still take a pass on certain foods because they won't fit into my goal for the day. However, I don't feel deprived or disappointed. I still feel thrilled with the results of this journey. And most importantly, I am not afraid of maintaining. When I step on the scale and it says the same thing it did last time I looked (within a pound or so) I feel really good. This is what I was hoping for. This is what the point of this whole dieting thing was all about and I really hope that reading and relating to my experience will help even one other person feel this way.

The advice: do not think of maintenance as the end of your journey. It isn't. Think of it as a place to feel comfortable and settled in your new, healthier lifestyle. You may or may not need to keep tracking your calories depending on how accurate you become at judging your daily intake vs calories burned. You don't need to control yourself with an iron fist - it's okay to go over a bit here and there as long as you're not just going after junk food cookie-monster style 24/7. I found using the weekly goals on the MFP app to be incredibly helpful.

All you really need to do is check your head and find a way to be comfortable in your life. It will be different than it was before you started your weight loss - it has to be or you will end up right back where you started. But it's totally worth it.

Replies

  • nitafahita
    nitafahita Posts: 1 Member
    Thanks for that, it was really helpful to read for someone struggling with maintenance :smile:
  • oldy76
    oldy76 Posts: 185 Member
    I love this post!! Thank you, it was a really good read (not too long at all) :bigsmile:
  • mixtapes23
    mixtapes23 Posts: 30 Member
    This was so nice to read. I haven't even settled into my apprehensions about maintenance but I already feel better. Thank you :flowerforyou:
  • roxanethree
    roxanethree Posts: 78 Member
    I've started today, so great timing. :) I'm pretty nervous about it because I love sweets. I'm very active though so hopefully things won't change too much for me. I know it will always be a battle and I'm pretty sure I'll have to keep track of calories the rest of my life.
  • angel7472
    angel7472 Posts: 317 Member
    Thank you for this. This is exactly why I tell myself that even though Im on maintenance (have been since last Oct) that its not a free for all on the freezer and pantry. As much as I would love to not work out and eat ice cream, chips and chocolate day in and day out, I just cant! Not without reverting back to exactly where I started. Its still a challenge in self discipline to tell myself no not today, or you can only have a couple of the Dove dark eggs not the whole bag! lol
    I wish you luck in the future!!! We all need some to resist the temptations that are always there :flowerforyou:
  • Mav3rick54
    Mav3rick54 Posts: 180 Member
    Thank you for sharing your experience. Perfect timing for me. :drinker:
  • Whiskeytub
    Whiskeytub Posts: 96 Member
    Thanks everyone, I'm really glad to be able to help. Maintenance can be harder than weight loss if you let it. But it's all about how you go at it mentally. Adjusting my mental approach to maintaining made it something doable and comfortable rather than some kind of awkward diet limbo.
  • CynthiaT60
    CynthiaT60 Posts: 1,280 Member
    Very good post; I hope I can find it again when I get to maintenance (it'll be a while...). Congrats! Sounds to me like you've got it figured out.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,268 Member
    I am not at maintenance yet but working my way there...currently reverse dieting.

    I get this totally.

    I prelog for days ahead - 2 or 3 days...it helps but I forget to eat stuff I have logged....in the evening I am not hungry, not thinking about it, already had my chocolate fix...bam I go to bed..wake up and realize...crap I didn't eat my ice cream...delete it from the previous day and I am at TDEE-20% for that day.

    Today I ate and have prelogged treats for a Saturday evening, even after having Pizza for dinner...and I am at TDEE-20%...my treats are chocolate covered almonds+ Hershey's variety of nuggest + chips...

    Eating more food is not easier...you have to really be diligent...adding in calorie dense foods...

    But me being me I can't stomache full fat milk, or full fat cheese it's all too heavy for me and I've been that way since before I lost weight.

    And even with the extra food I have extra energy...I was sitting last night (Friday night) bored so went for a walk..it was only 1 1/4 miles but I did it in 20mins...but that was after my already planned workout of lifting.

    Maintaining is going to take as much preplanning and prelogging and thought as losing...Maybe more.
  • rosehips60
    rosehips60 Posts: 1,030 Member
    13 to go til maintenance will read and re-read this thank you!
  • Anonycatgirl
    Anonycatgirl Posts: 502 Member
    Bumping this oldie but goodie so I can reread it when I need it. (And I will!)
  • jimdevico
    jimdevico Posts: 4
    Great write up and advice. Funny thing is I hit my goal and then had Chinese food last night and more dessert than I probably should have. :)

    Anyway, thanks again. I'm glad I found this.
  • themedalist
    themedalist Posts: 3,217 Member
    My best advice is to develop a maintenance plan, just as you had a plan to lose weight.

    Here's my plan. I've maintained for 2 years:

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/themedalist/view/what-s-your-maintenance-plan-624676
  • auntiebabs
    auntiebabs Posts: 1,754 Member
    bump
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    I started maintenance recently and was doing ok. I was still having troublie eating back my exercise calories, so I was still losing some weight, but not quickly. Then I was diagnosed with silent reflux, which is reflux without any symptoms. My doctor gave me a prescription for something and Zantac twice a day, but the kicker is all the foods I'm no longer allowed to eat. It totally threw me off my game! Totally things that were staples in my diet plus some stuff that I don't eat or rarely eat. But, no tomatoes, tart fruits, strawberries, blueberries, peppermint (including tea), onions, chocolate!, alcohol (not a biggie), carbonated beverages (also no problem), cigarettes (I don't smoke), fried and fatty foods, including peanut butter. Sigh...
  • Also, be aware that others are sometimes less supportive of you resisting fattening foods when you look perfectly thin. My parents thought I was "obsessing" just still tracking calories. But I know from experience all the weight can indeed come back quickly and way too easily.
  • svettybear
    svettybear Posts: 6 Member
    bump to keep for the future when I hit maintenance! Great read, thanks for sharing!
  • k80flec
    k80flec Posts: 1,623 Member
    A good read - that reflects where I am. After years (decades??) of yo-yoing the OP's thoughts are where I ended up. Result - 6 months of maintenance, weight flexibly (within 3lbs) staying the same.
    I still log every day, I move more so I can eat scones, ice-cream and chocolate - as long as they fit my macros. I can't imagine not logging every day, maybe that day will come, maybe it won't. I'll know when the time is right.

    Thanks for sharing
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