Why can't I stay committed?

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  • MichaelRobinson1994
    MichaelRobinson1994 Posts: 83 Member
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    I'm 5ft 10.5 and I started my weight loss journey at 180lbs, and I really didn't make too many changes and you shouldn't have to either!

    Firstly, the biggest change for me was no longer using the car as often as possible to go anywhere! - I'll walk the mile to the shops, and walk the mile back with bags - 4/5 times a week, I just have to set aside an hour to go, and that makes a massive difference.

    If you make simple changes, like fruit when you want chocolate, some nuts if you want something oily/greasy! Then the whole process becomes more of a routine than 'weight loss' or 'dieiting'.

    Also, if you swap out things like white rice and bread for the brown and wholemeal varieties then that can help massively.

    Throw in some progressive strength training and you'll be at your goal weight before you know it! (Possibly even above it but toned and firm and happy to maintain there!)
  • suprangela79
    suprangela79 Posts: 34 Member
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    When your reason to do it becomes more intrinsic than extrinsic, commitment to it will be much easier.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/588404-intrinsic-or-extrinsic-which-are-you?hl=intrinsic/extrinsic

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    Thank you! That link was helpful and you are right. Any time I've tried to lose weight for an event I've always lost motivation as soon as it was over. I need to focus on doing this to be healthy.
  • Embera
    Embera Posts: 291 Member
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    Personally I find it easier to do stuff like this when you have someone to do it with when you have support even if its only online it helps to motivate youto either compete with them or just be able to vent and not feel judged in a place like this me and my best friend were doing this together and then she stopped and I lost a big part of my motivation not to mention I lost my access to the Internet and my valentine led to this site on numerous occasions so in my mind it was all or nothing thats why im back looking for good friends to talk to on a regular basis so we can help motivate each other even talk on phone now that I also have unlimited minutesto give each other ideas and little advice so we're not on our own so add me vomited people
  • bergpa
    bergpa Posts: 148 Member
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    As someone who tends to be an emotional eater, I've found that expressing my feelings really helps me to control my eating. I was actually surprised when I realized that if I say something early on when an issue is bothering me, it usually isn't that big a deal to the other person and often is easily solved. Emotionally I was making mountains out of mole hills and packing on pounds as a result.
  • MegE_N
    MegE_N Posts: 245 Member
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    I'm focusing on setting small goals. Right now it's to reach 25lbs lost. And from there it'll be to hit 35lbs lost - my halfway point. And from there it'll be 15lbs more lost, because that will put me in ONEDERLAND. The small goals are so much easier.

    Whenever I sit back and think wow, I want to lose 100lbs total, I get terrified. I'll never be that person standing in half my pants - it's impossible! I've always been fat and always will be fat! That way leads to madness.

    I can't lose 100lbs. But I can lose another 2. And from there another 10. And from there another 15....
  • Hearts_2015
    Hearts_2015 Posts: 12,031 Member
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    bump
  • RWTBR
    RWTBR Posts: 140 Member
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    Hey OP, you should check out this topic I started a while back. It might help you.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1339196-why-is-consistency-so-hard-for-most-people?
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    Here I am getting ready to start over...again... I am just so disgusted with myself anymore. I know that I need to watch what I eat but I just don't seem to care lately. I am an emotional eater and always have been. I'll eat something I shouldn't, knowing full well I shouldn't or I'll eat something because I am bored or because it is there.

    I've done it all...binged and purged, crash diets, diet pills, you name it! I've lost weight soooo many times and have regained it plus every time and I could kick myself for letting this happen. I am at my heaviest weight now (232 lbs) and I'm only 5'3". My husband says "just eat smaller portions and exercise." Well gee, thanks for the tip! I know that but I just can't seem to find the motivation to stick with it and keep it off. I have no idea how to maintain after I've lost weight (although I can maintain being fat pretty well). I have about 100 lbs to it just seems so overwhelming...

    Anyway, thanks for "listening" to me vent. I just need to start and not look back!

    My guess is that you are eating too little and exercising too much when you try to lose weight.

    My tip would be to set your weight loss to a half pound a week and exercise no more than 30 minutes 5X per week.

    Here's a particularly inspirational thread: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1331276-i-have-tried-everything
  • dawnmcneil10
    dawnmcneil10 Posts: 638 Member
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    How about finding an activity you enjoy? When I was my heaviest I obviously couldn't go running for example but I found that taking a walk was a great stress reliever. Try some different things, walking may not be it, maybe shooting hoops is, maybe knitting or crocheting is what takes your mind off things. The issues that feed your emotions won't just go away but finding a different outlet might help your ability to process it.
    I've heard about healing quilts, blankets, afgans and so on, the idea is to use what's bothering you to create something to help yourself or another. Use one of your talents, we all have them. :)
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
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    Here I am getting ready to start over...again... I am just so disgusted with myself anymore. I know that I need to watch what I eat but I just don't seem to care lately. I am an emotional eater and always have been. I'll eat something I shouldn't, knowing full well I shouldn't or I'll eat something because I am bored or because it is there.

    I've done it all...binged and purged, crash diets, diet pills, you name it! I've lost weight soooo many times and have regained it plus every time and I could kick myself for letting this happen. I am at my heaviest weight now (232 lbs) and I'm only 5'3". My husband says "just eat smaller portions and exercise." Well gee, thanks for the tip! I know that but I just can't seem to find the motivation to stick with it and keep it off. I have no idea how to maintain after I've lost weight (although I can maintain being fat pretty well). I have about 100 lbs to it just seems so overwhelming...

    Anyway, thanks for "listening" to me vent. I just need to start and not look back!

    The bolded part is why you can't seem to stay committed. I'm being dead serious. You mention trying every trick in the book, but the unfortunate truth of it all is: there ARE no tricks. None. Stop trying faddy, gimmicky, get-slim-quick schemes, and just eat a little less. The only way to lose weight is to eat fewer calories than you burn.

    You can do this by starting slow. You mentioned eating when you are bored, or emotional, or just because it's there. Well, do what you can to remove those situations from your life, or yourself from the situations.

    Had a hard day and want to unwind? Take a bubble bath with a book instead of eating that cake in the fridge. Bored? Go for a walk, or pick up a hobby that occupies your hands (do you know how hard it is to eat when you're sculpting clay, or knitting?) Find a sugar-free gum that you really like, and reach for that instead of the box of crackers in the pantry.

    Swap out healthier or lower-calorie substitutes for treats in the house. If it's not there, you can't eat it, right?

    Most of all, though, don't let one mistake deter you. If you lose control and eat a whole box of doughnuts, ok. Fine. Have a light dinner that night. maybe go for a brisk walk, and keep on truckin'. Don't "give up" for the rest of the day. If you stumble down one stair, do you throw yourself down the rest of the staircase, because you failed at one step? :noway:

    Let's get real. One unhealthy meal will not make you fat, just like one healthy meal will not make you fit. It's a marathon and a patience game, and those who are able to stick with their small-but-cumulative lifestyle changes are the ones that will win in the end.
  • Joy_Ryder
    Joy_Ryder Posts: 21
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    OMGosh, I had to check to make sure I didn't write this ... I don't need to lose as much as you do, but everything else is on tap with me. I could stand to lose about 40 lbs and even that is hard to achieve when your head is in two different places. The difference being "Knowing" and "Doing". I think what helped me before was PREPLANNING and PRE-PREPPING MEALS - you would never believe how much that helped and I'm definitely going to start doing that again (once I get to the grocery store that is!). Take a day and cook your meals - your breakfast, lunch and dinners for the week. A lot of stuff you can repeat eating if you really like it. For instance, I would make 4 stuffed peppers at a time (stuffed with ground turkey, brown rice, salsa and black beans) - that would be two lunches and two dinners. I also loved sweet potato and tuna patties - again a couple lunches/dinners. I also stocked up on steamable frozen vegetables where you just cook them right in the microwave in the bag ... not as "good for you" as fresh produce, but when you're on a tight budget and time constraints, these work wonderfully. Anyway, this has always helped me and stopped me from going to McDonald's because I was too lazy that morning to pack a lunch .. this way all your lunches are already prepared for you to just grab.

    Hope this helps a little!
  • loser4realz
    loser4realz Posts: 18 Member
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    Most of all, though, don't let one mistake deter you. If you lose control and eat a whole box of doughnuts, ok. Fine. Have a light dinner that night. maybe go for a brisk walk, and keep on truckin'. Don't "give up" for the rest of the day. If you stumble down one stair, do you throw yourself down the rest of the staircase, because you failed at one step? :noway:

    So true, AllOutof_Bubb. That whole 'start over tomorrow' mentality when I indulged at lunch, or even worse 'start over on Monday' when I've slipped by Thursday was just me giving myself a free pass. What I needed to do was kick myself in the butt to get back on track THAT day at the very next meal.

    Lot's of good info from everyone else too. I know I'm not the OP but this has been a very helpful post!
  • brandeka
    brandeka Posts: 28 Member
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    Hi, I can totally relate to what you are saying. I am 5'2" and 240 lbs. This is my second time trying MPF. I am an emotional eater and that is one of the reasons I went off the rails the last time. I also hear the same thing from my husband about "just eat less". On top of that, I have asthma & COPD which makes it difficult to exercise due to breathing problems. I know from past experience that the more I can exercise, the better the breathing is, but it's hard to get out there when it is so difficult. I am really hoping I can stay the course this time.
  • smashley_mashley
    smashley_mashley Posts: 589 Member
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    The other thing I'll add is mental outlook. No one realy talks about the mental/psychological aspect of weight loss but it's a huge factor. You need to really be ready for these changes and you really need to want these changes. I used to think I just wanted to be skinny but it wasn't a "real" enough reason for me to stick with it. As I aged, my family history of heart disease started becoming more of a problem as my cholesterol and blood pressure rose. So I made it more about improving my health and a couple years in really focused on fitness as well. Makes it a lot easier to stick with AND makes me less likely to ever go back to where I was.

    I would agree that the psychological component is the biggest obstacle. I've been on the wagon and off the wagon since I joined in 2009. Usually I would go about 2 weeks before giving up and just doing what I was doing and not lose anything.

    After university (2009) I got a desk job (im addition to other life events at the same time) which caused me to start packing it on (hence the reason joining mfp). I kept gaining and peaked at 211 but plateued for several years at 204. After a while i just got complacent. I switched jobs which found me more busy and taking longer breaks which equalled me sitting more and exercising less. Fast forward to mid 2013 and I felt tired and sluggish all the time and my back hurt from not moving. I work in occupational rehab and saw the effect of not exercising has on the body yet I wasn't practicing what I preached.

    December 2013 I am finally fed up with myself...tired of feeling tired, sluggish, lazy, and just overall feeling like poo. So I got in touch with a personal trainer at work and she put an exercise program together and we tried changing diet alone by cutting portions. I stuck with the exercise bit the portion control didn't work...after the first six weeks my weight didn't change (but I gained muscle). I tried adding mostly veggies and green smoothies. That didn't work. At the beginning of May this year we tried doing just a food journal ( no calorie counting). That lasted two weeks. Finally I resigned myself to do I doing mfp.

    I am now in my longest streak since I joined in 2009 and am at my lowest since I signed up.

    I know it is a long story but my point is, is that your head needs to be in the game. Sure there are days I go over but I don't stress about because now it is a reminder for me to stay on track the next day. I've noticed I don't crave salty or sweets as I used to and I have significantly cut back on snacking between meals (I.e
    Grabbing a piece of cheese when I walk by the fridge). The best partvos that i don't feel tired or sluggish and my back doesn't hurt. I feel so much more confident and seeing the(slow) progress is what keeps me going because this isn't a quick fix but a long term lifestyle change
  • robocats9
    robocats9 Posts: 8 Member
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    I think one key for me is that when I do have success sometimes I allow myself to slip into old, bad habits I DO notice it happening but I don't do anything about it. I get into that, I'll get back on the wagon tomorrow sort of mentality.

    I bet a lot of people who gain back weight lost do have signs that they are slipping but choose to ignore those signs. Soon eating one more cookie becomes two, skipping one workout becomes skipping one week of working out, slipping up on watching your portion sizes leads to feeding yourself more than intended to the point of weight gains.

    I have lost about 40 pounds since December and I started falling off my own wagon, instead of just letting that turn into the slippery slope back to being 40+ pounds heavier than when I started I have re-upped my commitment to myself. I am re-reading some nutrition books, looking through my cookbooks and making grocery lists and menu plans for my family so that I can get myself back on track.

    I really don't want to go through all what I did to get that first 40 pounds off. I just have to keep reminding myself and noticing those signs when i start slipping.

    You can do this, you just have to look at a small picture, like 5 or 10 pound increments, one meal at a time successes, one workout at a time success. Find your small wins every day and let those add up.
  • cincysweetheart
    cincysweetheart Posts: 892 Member
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    Thanks ladies for your advice! I think for me it is a mental thing. I know that when I get down near my goal weight I tend to start easing up on exercise and thinking it's okay to eat this or that and pretty soon I've gained 10 lbs. I think some of it has to do with the extra attention I get when I am thinner. I don't think mentally I am prepared for it and so I gain the weight back because I feel more "comfortable" being what I refer to as "invisible" to others. I guess I know what I need to work on but how... Are there any good books out there to read about this type of issue?

    Taming the Feast Beast by Lois Trimpey

    Yes! I love anything by Jack and Lois Trimpey. You may also enjoy Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey. It's more geared toward alcohol and drug addictions, but I find it very applicable across the board with all addictions.
  • jennyofmiller
    jennyofmiller Posts: 6
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    You should every day tell yourself that you will achieve your goal. I love the quotes I found on Pinterest and Tumblr regarding fitness motivation. But, you can find more to motivate stay on track. For example. you can read about life coaching or the power of the unconscious. It will guide you to stay positive because your life is what you believe, as you know. Try to find a person who has the same goal and who can motivate you and teach you more about exercising.
  • emccand
    emccand Posts: 195 Member
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    Im having the same issues staying committed, please feel free to add me, I need friends that are active to help me stay on track!
  • aprilflower18232
    aprilflower18232 Posts: 205 Member
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    Don't think of having to lose 100 pounds....set smaller short term goals along the way. When I started out I weighed 325, my first goal was to get out get out of the 300's, next it was 275, and so forth....I now weigh 191 and my goal is 162 (half my body weight from when I started) also please don't put time limits on your goals, that can set yourself up for disappointment....just vow that you will reach your goals in your own time.....you can do this, I believe that you can...weight loss is an incredible journey with MANY ups and down along the way but I believe it's worth it!
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    Most of all, though, don't let one mistake deter you. If you lose control and eat a whole box of doughnuts, ok. Fine. Have a light dinner that night. maybe go for a brisk walk, and keep on truckin'. Don't "give up" for the rest of the day. If you stumble down one stair, do you throw yourself down the rest of the staircase, because you failed at one step? :noway:

    So true, AllOutof_Bubb. That whole 'start over tomorrow' mentality when I indulged at lunch, or even worse 'start over on Monday' when I've slipped by Thursday was just me giving myself a free pass. What I needed to do was kick myself in the butt to get back on track THAT day at the very next meal.

    Lot's of good info from everyone else too. I know I'm not the OP but this has been a very helpful post!

    Yes. If you forget to brush your teeth one night because you are busy and tired, do you wait until Monday to start brushing your teeth again?

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