Motivation comes in waves.

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Please, tell me how to stay motivated! What works for you?

My weight has been a constant issue for me. It's really getting me down lately and the only person who can change that is me. Which is even more upsetting right now as I don't have the motivation. It's just not there. I just binge eat.

How do you start losing weight when you don't have the motivation? And how do you continue once on that journey when the motivation goes?

I just find it so difficult as I have a 9 month old daughter and my boyfriend works. So when my boyfriend is off work I want to spend time together as a family. Which leaves no time for exercising. I just don't know how to fit it in. And with my boyfriends hours, he often doesn't finish until late so then we eat quick junk food.

Please help, I'm at a loss right now. ????
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Replies

  • maryjay52
    maryjay52 Posts: 557 Member
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    theres no reason why you cannot take one half hour to work out when your boyfriend is around . ..in the grand scope of things its only one half hour ..or if you have a nine month old and are at home with the baby then workout when the baby takes a nap..just for a half hour . i live an extremely busy life . i own a business, go to school, nurse on call, am on the board of directors for a nonprofit and have to take care of my house and my 3 acres of land and my pool.. i used to make excuses that i was too busy to work out. now i use it as my escape.everything in my life gets put on hold so i an workout . i used to do it just for a half hour but now i do more because ive found pleasure in escaping my every day life for that time. i always walk away feeling way better.

    so far as the junk food goes..grabbing healthy choices is just as quick as grabbing junk food .its all about changing habits . i make sure food is in my fridge i can grab because my life is always on the go
  • GiveMeCoffee
    GiveMeCoffee Posts: 3,556 Member
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    Motivation will come and go, you need to start creating good habits and develop a routine. Do some meal prepping so food is ready. You have a 9 month old I'm going to assume she takes naps you can use that time for some exercise. You have to decide if you are ready to make a change and commit to it. Stop the excuses because if you want it you will do it.

    Here's some information that might help

    Log your food accurately and honestly. Go for 80% good choices the other 20% don't worry so much about. I eat lots of delicious food and have consistently lost. Keep it simple find a REASONABLE deficit:

    If you have 75+ lbs to lose 2 lbs/week is ideal
    If you have 40-75 lbs to lose 1.5 lbs/week is ideal
    If you have 25-40 lbs to lose 1 lbs/week is ideal
    If you have 15 -25 lbs to lose 0.5 to 1.0 lbs/week is ideal
    If you have less than 15 lbs to lose 0.5 lbs/week is ideal

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1234699-logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide?hl=logging+step+guide

    Find an activity you enjoy doing - I found I love to ride my bike and lift heavy stuff :)

    Here are 2 more threads that will help take the time to read them:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here?hl=so+you're+new+here

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants
  • gypsy_spirit
    gypsy_spirit Posts: 2,107 Member
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    Motivation will come and go, you need to start creating good habits and develop a routine. Do some meal prepping so food is ready. You have a 9 month old I'm going to assume she takes naps you can use that time for some exercise. You have to decide if you are ready to make a change and commit to it. Stop the excuses because if you want it you will do it.

    Here's some information that might help

    Log your food accurately and honestly. Go for 80% good choices the other 20% don't worry so much about. I eat lots of delicious food and have consistently lost. Keep it simple find a REASONABLE deficit:

    If you have 75+ lbs to lose 2 lbs/week is ideal
    If you have 40-75 lbs to lose 1.5 lbs/week is ideal
    If you have 25-40 lbs to lose 1 lbs/week is ideal
    If you have 15 -25 lbs to lose 0.5 to 1.0 lbs/week is ideal
    If you have less than 15 lbs to lose 0.5 lbs/week is ideal

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1234699-logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide?hl=logging+step+guide

    Find an activity you enjoy doing - I found I love to ride my bike and lift heavy stuff :)

    Here are 2 more threads that will help take the time to read them:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here?hl=so+you're+new+here

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    Everything she said ^^ This is what worked for me. Habits, habits, habits. Just start making them a part of your day. If you want this badly enough - you will make it happen.
  • _Zardoz_
    _Zardoz_ Posts: 3,987 Member
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    I just find it so difficult as I have a 9 month old daughter and my boyfriend works. So when my boyfriend is off work I want to spend time together as a family. Which leaves no time for exercising. I just don't know how to fit it in. And with my boyfriends hours, he often doesn't finish until late so then we eat quick junk food.
    I care for my chronically ill and disabled wife 24 hours a day and I find time. There is always some time be it early in the morning or late in the night. I frequently go running at 11 pm or later at night. Rather than 20 minutes on the net or watching TV go do some exercise. We can all make excuses (I've been there and made them) but we can all find an hour somewhere most days.

    Motivation is fleeting it lasts days, seconds or hours what gets you going is habit and consistency. No one can do this but you others can offer support and advice but the practicalities and the will to do it comes from yourself.

    There is some great advice and people on MFP but only you can make those steps

    Good luck
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
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    I just find it so difficult as I have a 9 month old daughter and my boyfriend works. So when my boyfriend is off work I want to spend time together as a family. Which leaves no time for exercising. I just don't know how to fit it in. And with my boyfriends hours, he often doesn't finish until late so then we eat quick junk food.
    I care for my chronically ill and disabled wife 24 hours a day and I find time. There is always some time be it early in the morning or late in the night. I frequently go running at 11 pm or later at night. Rather than 20 minutes on the net or watching TV go do some exercise. We can all make excuses (I've been there and made them) but we can all find an hour somewhere most days.

    Motivation is fleeting it lasts days, seconds or hours what gets you going is habit and consistency. No one can do this but you others can offer support and advice but the practicalities and the will to do it comes from yourself.

    There is some great advice and people on MFP but only you can make those steps

    Good luck
    well said:flowerforyou:
  • sun_fish
    sun_fish Posts: 864 Member
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    I agree with what others have said suggesting creating habits rather than waiting for motivation to strike.

    What about taking the baby for walks or jogs and having your boyfriend join too? My husband works long hours and our daily walks are often the only time we have together.
  • Snip8241
    Snip8241 Posts: 767 Member
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    It is easy to put other things and people in your life ahead of you. Even the baby. While the baby's immediate needs must come first, you can also take care of yourself. I agree with the person that said, take the baby for a walk and work out while your boyfriend is home.
    I was a very busy mother. I did not take care of myself during that time and since then I have struggled.
    You can do this.....just start.
  • brosis85
    brosis85 Posts: 114 Member
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    First this is first ... its not a diet, it needs to be a lifestyle. You are already on the right track by trying different methods out to keep track and help find motivation, so keep up the good work!

    I found what worked best for me was having a coach or a cheerleader doing a couple of things. 1. Not accepting my excuses and pointing out when I was making them and 2. they were holding me accountable by checking in!

    Also - as everyone else has said, find something you love and get hooked on! Fitness is as addicting as fast food! It the one thing you can do in a day that is totally 100% to your benefit.

    Good luck!
  • joolywooly33
    joolywooly33 Posts: 421 Member
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    Motivation does come and go but if you get into a good routine it will become habit. When I started working out again after the birth of my second child ... I hated every minute of it. Now I cant get enough.....and it has become a daily routine that I stick to, even if it is just getting my boys and going out for a walk or taking the football to the park.

    If your baby is 9 months old then all the more opportunity. When she is awake stick her in the pram and go out for a power walk, hit the hills and get sweaty. When she is napping stick on a DVD. There are loads that are 30 minutes or less and you can pick them up dead cheap or even watch online (Jillian Michaels and T25 are my favorites).

    Diet wise, you know what foods are good and bad....if you don't want to eat take away late, eat a small healthy meal with your daughter and pass later on. Bottom line is you are making excuses right now - do you really want this? If so get stuck in....

    I would also say that most of us, me included, are working full time with young children, unhelpful partners and all the usual distractions of life, but still make time to commit to a healthy lifestyle - you CAN do it!!!
  • CompressedCarbon
    CompressedCarbon Posts: 353 Member
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    Habit.

    Habit.

    Habit.

    Hobbit. (because some times you have to change things up)

    Habit.

    Habit.
  • THECaptainObvious
    THECaptainObvious Posts: 399 Member
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    Motivation is an everyday thing... Rather than saying "this month I will lose..." tell yourself when you get up "Today I'm DOING CARDIO for 30 minutes"... Once you start you will feel better and feel motivated to keep going. Get up everyday and just talk yourself into it rather than out of it.
  • laurenb1994
    laurenb1994 Posts: 40 Member
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    Thanks for all the advice everyone. It is true I make excuses. But it's hard getting out of the mindset (there's another one!).

    It's not much but I got on my Wii as soon as I was done on here (only 10 mins as my friend who is a week overdue in her pregnancy needed to bring her daughter round so she can go to the hospital). I also recharged my fitbit. I guess I just now need support in keeping at it. Someone to give me a push on the days I feel like giving up.

    I know I can do it if I put my mind to it as in the past over a period of time I lost 35lbs. It's just trying to keep in the mindset for it all the time that I find difficult.
  • Kenazwa
    Kenazwa Posts: 278 Member
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    From what I remember, having a 9 month old brings a lot of exercise into your life: picking baby up, putting baby down, walking around patting baby's back, jiggling/bouncing baby around, taking baby out in stroller or backpack carrier, etc. Give yourself credit for what you're already doing, then do more of it. I remember saying "time for my little boy lifts!"
  • JTick
    JTick Posts: 2,131 Member
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    You don't find time, you make time.

    Is there any reason why you can't stick your daughter in a bouncer or something for 30 mins and do a workout DVD? Working out doesn't have to consist of three hours in the gym. Put her in a stroller and walk around the neighborhood. There are plenty of ways to exercise with an infant around.
  • Slashnl
    Slashnl Posts: 338 Member
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    Habit.

    Habit.

    Habit.

    Hobbit. (because some times you have to change things up)

    Habit.

    Habit.


    Love this! Almost made me snort!
  • GiveMeCoffee
    GiveMeCoffee Posts: 3,556 Member
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    Thanks for all the advice everyone. It is true I make excuses. But it's hard getting out of the mindset (there's another one!).

    It's not much but I got on my Wii as soon as I was done on here (only 10 mins as my friend who is a week overdue in her pregnancy needed to bring her daughter round so she can go to the hospital). I also recharged my fitbit. I guess I just now need support in keeping at it. Someone to give me a push on the days I feel like giving up.

    I know I can do it if I put my mind to it as in the past over a period of time I lost 35lbs. It's just trying to keep in the mindset for it all the time that I find difficult.

    10 minutes is a good start. When you feel like giving up ask yourself.. What will giving up solve? Will you reach your goals? You want to be able to run and play with your daughter, this is the best time to get serious. Trust me when she's 2 and moving all over getting into everything it helps to be able to move quick.

    Don't try to change too many things all at once, don't overly restrict. Keep it simple, there are no off limit foods, you just need to eat smaller amounts. Good luck to you and use the fitbit, I love mine for showing me when I'm being too lazy like today :)
  • cmcollins001
    cmcollins001 Posts: 3,472 Member
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    Habit.

    Habit.

    Habit.

    Hobbit. (because some times you have to change things up)

    Habit.

    Habit.

    tumblr_n4lscg84M41rhavdko1_400.gif


    I'm currently coming out of Hobbit phase and getting back into habit phase...so no more second breakfast for me!

    tumblr_m0cp3jpF3D1qjstdno3_250.gif
  • Keevy333
    Keevy333 Posts: 32 Member
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    Basically what everyone else has said. I am far from an expert, but what works for me is building habits and trying my best to make healthier choices. I have a 19 month old daughter, who was only a year when I started. I understand your feelings of it being hard with your child and trying to squeeze in family time. I usually try to get my workout in during her nap (which is hard sometimes cause I would rather nap with her! lol) or sometimes I just sacrifice family time for 30 minutes of me time. As far as junk food goes, we only go for take out or junk food maybe once or twice a month and when we do I try my best to pick the healthiest thing or I let that one day become my "cheat day" and don't get down on myself for it.
  • rebeccaplatt21
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    Habits, habits, habits. Just start making them a part of your day. If you want this badly enough - you will make it happen.


    this^^ but don't try changing everything all at once. that's made the difference for me this time. first i started eating better. not perfect, better- january. then i started walking to work 3-4 days a week- march. nothing changed except i FELT better. i got sick of the scale not moving, or moving UP instead of down and so i brought those 2 habits together, and found MFP! - June. my first 2 weeks, i logged everything i ate. EVERYTHING, good or bad. i learned some different stuff by reading up on it. now (with the help of my fitbit) i eat in a deficit. i also switched from walking to work (too hot) to exercising in the morning in the A/C! i don't suggest going that slow, but if that's what it takes, then who cares. add something new each week or every other week.

    it is all truly HABIT now! my alarm goes off, i get up. pick an exercise from youTube and do it. somedays, i don't want to do sh** so i do pilates....as close to doing nothing besides stretching, but it's still something and actually good for you. when i want to FEEL like i've done something, i do strength training/resistance training.

    i have 3 kids, 7, 4, and 17 mo. my husband and i both work full time. and we homeschool! there is ALWAYS time to do things, if you WANT to! and now as a habit, my husband doesn't ask me if we can have pizza tonight, because he knows i will say no! he has started looking for recipe's he KNOWS will fit my macro's i aim for :-) (i happen to do low carb/high fat because i have pcos)

    good luck. if you want it, you can do it! :-)
  • mackmama11
    mackmama11 Posts: 15 Member
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    I once heard someone say that nobody ever "feels like" working out, and that it everyone waited on the feeling that hardly anyone would be in shape. It helps me to remember this and know that I need to just do and get it out of the way.