I am having a hard time conquering my laziness..

zip_girl
zip_girl Posts: 29
in Getting Started
I have come to the realization that I have a big problem with laziness. There are things that I want to achieve but can't find the motivation. Whether it's going back to school, learning to speak Spanish, or losing weight and getting fit, the motivation just isn't there.

Honestly, it makes me sad that I am this type of person. A big eye-opener for me was when my supervisor said to someone "I don't know why she stays here, she could do so much more." That statement hit me like a ton of bricks. I know I'm not living up to my potential.

I want to be overall better not just with my career, including my weight/health/appearance. I know being overweight and under active are horrible for your health, make you feel bad and make you look bad. I know these things and it bothers me but is that enough motivation? Apparently not.

I know I have problem but I don't know how to fix it. I would like to know if anyone else feel this way and any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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Replies

  • mirandagod77
    mirandagod77 Posts: 132 Member
    wonder if you are depressed? just as it sounds like it steams into different avenues of your life? just a thought
  • oksanatkachuk
    oksanatkachuk Posts: 149 Member
    IMO u want too much at the same time.
    Wanting smth and not achieving it can be a reason for depression.

    Pick one at the time, fix it, move to the next goal.
    Too much change in lifestyle will be hard to handle.

    Good luck, none of the things u listed are impossible. Babysteps at the time will boost ur confidence and motivation
  • oksanatkachuk
    oksanatkachuk Posts: 149 Member
    wonder if you are depressed? just as it sounds like it steams into different avenues of your life? just a thought

    Aha. Same thought
  • JenRunTriHappyGirl
    JenRunTriHappyGirl Posts: 521 Member
    It all starts with creating a habit. Pick a good time for you and go for a walk. Its a lot harder to be lazy outside. Make it a plan that on these 2 days a week at this time, I will go for a walk. Do that for 2 weeks and then maybe add another day. It is hard to find motivation at first. Find some good music to make it more fun, or a book on 'tape." Whatever will help keep you entertained and get you moving! Once it becomes a habit though, it is so much easier! And, it becomes routine and you will find that if you do not do it, then you will miss it.

    Good luck!
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    wonder if you are depressed? just as it sounds like it steams into different avenues of your life? just a thought

    It crossed my mind that my post may sound like that and I meant to make a note in it that I don't think I am because I am overall happy. But I will keep it in mind if it continues. On a side note, I am hoping to get off hormonal birth control soon,which I know can have an effect on depression/anxiety/mood so maybe that will help. Thanks
  • shutch2112
    shutch2112 Posts: 236 Member
    I have the exact same laziness problem. I find what helps with me is routine. If I do something enough times in a row, my body will just do it everyday and I don't have to summon up the will to get off the couch/out of bed/etc. I can't (don't want to) even tell you how long it took for me to get into the habit of just flossing my teeth (gross, I know) because I was 'too busy' sitting on my butt playing games on my phone in the morning.

    Start small. I buy frozen lean cuisines every time I'm at the store and then stuff one and a cheese stick or other snack/side into a bag before work really quick. They aren't as healthy as making a fresh lunch, but I just can't seem to get myself to make something the night before, and I'm notorious for sleeping as long as humanly possible. And at least I'm not eating Jack in the Box everyday...

    I don't know if it will help you, but I put pictures of what I hope to acheive (a few months ago it was a picture of Katniss Everdeen in that skin tight suit from Catching Fire) somewhere I will see it everyday to remind me what I'm shooting for, why I'm dragging my butt up early to do yoga, or whatever I'm trying to put effort into that day. Might help?

    You can add me if you want! Maybe we can help motivate each other. :)
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,996 Member
    Some people fear success because it usually comes with a lot of responsibility. And if you've had a bad experience with having to have a lot of responsibility, it can carry over to other endeavors.
    I've been a manager at 2 major retail stores (Toys R Us and Circuit City) and the amount of responsibility and time I had to put in deterred me from applying as a Fitness manager (pay was great) at another major Fitness enterprise (24 Hour Fitness). I'm content right now being "just" a part time trainer and full time dad.
    Could I do the job? Absolutely no doubt in my mind. Do I really want to do it? Not at this time in my life. Who knows what the future may hold, but again it's something I have to desire to want to do or it ain't going to happen.
    Reassess why you're doing what you're doing. Is it for you or so that you appeal to friends, family, etc.?

    A.C.E. Certified Group Fitness and Personal Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • vmlabute
    vmlabute Posts: 311 Member
    I was depressed and ate a lot/ too little and didn't do anything for almost 4 years. I had my son, kicked my ex husband out, going to therapy, taking anti--depressant, and working out daily. It's a matter of changing your life around and that lightbulb HAS to light up in order you to get up and so that. I am here for you every step of the way whenever you need motivation and any kind of support!!
  • ValGogo
    ValGogo Posts: 2,168 Member
    Before you start to read the posts about depression, which is the last thing you should think about, listen to the gal that said something about routine. It's like having to pee. You have to go, you don't want to get up, but you can't do it in your pants. So you get up and go to the bathroom.

    It's that simple. You don't look for motivation; you get up and do it. You wanna learn Spanish and you're lazy? Get the free Busuu app or Language Learner app and start there.
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    IMO u want too much at the same time.
    Wanting smth and not achieving it can be a reason for depression.

    Pick one at the time, fix it, move to the next goal.
    Too much change in lifestyle will be hard to handle.

    Good luck, none of the things u listed are impossible. Babysteps at the time will boost ur confidence and motivation

    Thanks for the input, I will try to focus on losing weight and being more active before anything else because health really is so important.
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    Some people fear success because it usually comes with a lot of responsibility. And if you've had a bad experience with having to have a lot of responsibility, it can carry over to other endeavors.
    I've been a manager at 2 major retail stores (Toys R Us and Circuit City) and the amount of responsibility and time I had to put in deterred me from applying as a Fitness manager (pay was great) at another major Fitness enterprise (24 Hour Fitness). I'm content right now being "just" a part time trainer and full time dad.
    Could I do the job? Absolutely no doubt in my mind. Do I really want to do it? Not at this time in my life. Who knows what the future may hold, but again it's something I have to desire to want to do or it ain't going to happen.
    Reassess why you're doing what you're doing. Is it for you or so that you appeal to friends, family, etc.?

    A.C.E. Certified Group Fitness and Personal Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    Thanks, I understand what you're saying and I'm going to consider what I am wanting and why.
  • yoderaly
    yoderaly Posts: 3
    Maybe find people who will help you be accountable. For me it is really hard to let my friends down by not showing up. So I schedule my workouts with people, it allows me some social time and gets a workout in. Best wishes............
  • chelsealfinn
    chelsealfinn Posts: 19 Member
    You sound a lot like me. Do you have GAD? I find that my anxiety keeps me from trying things that I am afraid that I may fail at. I am afraid to go back to school because I'm scared I may not do well (even if I do my best). I was afraid to commit to losing weight because I was afraid that even if I tried my hardest I may not meet my own expectations. I have been afraid to look for a different job before because I was afraid that maybe I wouldn't be good at it or that maybe I would like it less than the one I had. I also find that I am a perfectionist in a way. My dad is a typical OCD type perfectionist to the point where he will even organize his socks in a very specific way. I am a different type of perfectionist. For example, right now my kitchen cabinets are unorganized and I hate it...but I'm also not really motivated to do anything about it because I know that if I went home today and cleaned them and reorganized them, they still would not be exactly how I want them, so I'd rather not do anything at all. This mindset sounds similar to what you are experiencing and it can be crippling. When hanging a picture on a wall, for example, some people (like my mom) will pick a spot and just hammer a nail right in and hang the picture, others (like my dad) will find a stud, bring out the lazer level and then carefully hang the picture, and people like myself will be worried that somehow they will screw up hanging the picture so they won't do it at all.

    You have to stop letting fear hold you back and try to be happy in knowing that you did your best. I have found that losing weight (even though I have just begun) has made me feel happier just because I AM DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT...for once. I now feel that even if I don't get to exactly where I want to be that that's okay, because at least I am trying.

    I would maybe suggest talking to a counselor about what you're experiencing. It wouldn't hurt to go and possibly learn more about yourself and come up with some coping strategies for anxiety if that's what you're experiencing.
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    I was depressed and ate a lot/ too little and didn't do anything for almost 4 years. I had my son, kicked my ex husband out, going to therapy, taking anti--depressant, and working out daily. It's a matter of changing your life around and that lightbulb HAS to light up in order you to get up and so that. I am here for you every step of the way whenever you need motivation and any kind of support!!

    You're right about needing the lightbulb, nothing has clicked for me even knowing that I'm not healthy should be motivation enough. Thanks for the support!
  • btanton27
    btanton27 Posts: 186 Member
    when I started my goal to becoming healthier, I felt the same way. I found that I have always enjoyed water so I joined a water aerobics class. if u find an activity that u enjoy, its much easier to exercise when it doesn't feel like exercise... does that make sense? lol. it was a small class, listened to good tunes and had a very upbeat teacher... before I knew it, the hour was over and I eventually started doing 2 classes in a row. try out new things until u find something that u enjoy and makes u feel good when ur done :)
  • HaywoodJ
    HaywoodJ Posts: 7 Member
    In my case, it's just the daily routine that I get in. My job includes a lot of computer time so that "lazy" feeling takes over quickly. Sometimes just a little change in that routine makes a big difference. I have a lot of property to maintain and when I have a busy weekend, I always feel energized(tired too) but better. Maybe do something different....short walk etc. Everyone is not like all the media portrial of the modern human.....just give yourself a break and make small changes!:smile:
  • brenn24179
    brenn24179 Posts: 2,144 Member
    I think we all deal with laziness to some extent. It is a lot of work to make changes in our life. I guess when we have had it, then we do something about it. I stayed in a marriage for 16 years before making a change. I got up to 208 lbs and got really miserable then made a change. I had a job (seems I have got better with this the older I got) and got good and miserable then left, wish I had left earlier but like you said lazy (it is a lot of work to change but well worth it) When I got my butt in gear and tried different stuff it worked out good! Change is frightening but we don't want to miss the good stuff.
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    You sound a lot like me. Do you have GAD? I find that my anxiety keeps me from trying things that I am afraid that I may fail at. I am afraid to go back to school because I'm scared I may not do well (even if I do my best). I was afraid to commit to losing weight because I was afraid that even if I tried my hardest I may not meet my own expectations. I have been afraid to look for a different job before because I was afraid that maybe I wouldn't be good at it or that maybe I would like it less than the one I had. I also find that I am a perfectionist in a way. My dad is a typical OCD type perfectionist to the point where he will even organize his socks in a very specific way. I am a different type of perfectionist. For example, right now my kitchen cabinets are unorganized and I hate it...but I'm also not really motivated to do anything about it because I know that if I went home today and cleaned them and reorganized them, they still would not be exactly how I want them, so I'd rather not do anything at all. This mindset sounds similar to what you are experiencing and it can be crippling. When hanging a picture on a wall, for example, some people (like my mom) will pick a spot and just hammer a nail right in and hang the picture, others (like my dad) will find a stud, bring out the lazer level and then carefully hang the picture, and people like myself will be worried that somehow they will screw up hanging the picture so they won't do it at all.

    You have to stop letting fear hold you back and try to be happy in knowing that you did your best. I have found that losing weight (even though I have just begun) has made me feel happier just because I AM DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT...for once. I now feel that even if I don't get to exactly where I want to be that that's okay, because at least I am trying.

    I would maybe suggest talking to a counselor about what you're experiencing. It wouldn't hurt to go and possibly learn more about yourself and come up with some coping strategies for anxiety if that's what you're experiencing.


    I haven't been formally diagnosed with anything related to anxiety but I it does run in my family so I suspect I do have some sort of problem with that. And you're right about letting that effect you because part of me doesn't want to go back to school and "waste" the money/time/energy if I don't end up using the degrees because you hear about so many people going to college and not being able to get a job. I really appreciate your comment because I am going to access how much it might be affecting me. Thanks
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    Maybe find people who will help you be accountable. For me it is really hard to let my friends down by not showing up. So I schedule my workouts with people, it allows me some social time and gets a workout in. Best wishes............

    Thanks for the advice, that is a good idea.
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    In my case, it's just the daily routine that I get in. My job includes a lot of computer time so that "lazy" feeling takes over quickly. Sometimes just a little change in that routine makes a big difference. I have a lot of property to maintain and when I have a busy weekend, I always feel energized(tired too) but better. Maybe do something different....short walk etc. Everyone is not like all the media portrial of the modern human.....just give yourself a break and make small changes!:smile:

    This was really helpful, thanks. I need to stop comparing myself to everyone because I am doing good and I am happy with it. I started using a fitbit about 2 weeks ago so that is definitely helping me get more active through out the day to try to help me reach my goal of steps.
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    when I started my goal to becoming healthier, I felt the same way. I found that I have always enjoyed water so I joined a water aerobics class. if u find an activity that u enjoy, its much easier to exercise when it doesn't feel like exercise... does that make sense? lol. it was a small class, listened to good tunes and had a very upbeat teacher... before I knew it, the hour was over and I eventually started doing 2 classes in a row. try out new things until u find something that u enjoy and makes u feel good when ur done :)


    That's a good idea! Thanks for the suggestion I will definitely be trying to find something that I enjoy doing.
  • mimishark
    mimishark Posts: 1
    Awareness of your emotional state is a beginning. I have learned over the years that my MINDSET is the most important thing in keeping my life in order. Find your "why" in your life. Why do you want to make changes, what is important to you, What do you WANT to do? Begin by answering these questions, then you have a decision. How bad do you want it? How important is it to you? What is important to you, you will find a way. If it is not important or not really your desire, you will find a way to ignore or sabotage your efforts.:flowerforyou:
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    I think we all deal with laziness to some extent. It is a lot of work to make changes in our life. I guess when we have had it, then we do something about it. I stayed in a marriage for 16 years before making a change. I got up to 208 lbs and got really miserable then made a change. I had a job (seems I have got better with this the older I got) and got good and miserable then left, wish I had left earlier but like you said lazy (it is a lot of work to change but well worth it) When I got my butt in gear and tried different stuff it worked out good! Change is frightening but we don't want to miss the good stuff.

    Thanks for the response, you're so right ! Good for you for making the changes!
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    Awareness of your emotional state is a beginning. I have learned over the years that my MINDSET is the most important thing in keeping my life in order. Find your "why" in your life. Why do you want to make changes, what is important to you, What do you WANT to do? Begin by answering these questions, then you have a decision. How bad do you want it? How important is it to you? What is important to you, you will find a way. If it is not important or not really your desire, you will find a way to ignore or sabotage your efforts.:flowerforyou:


    That is great advice, I'm going to do that. Thanks!
  • UsernameisNick
    UsernameisNick Posts: 49
    I had a hard time dealing with laziness as well. (I do IT work so sitting through 10-14 hour shifts didn't help)

    It all comes back to establishing a routine. Personally I used to drink iced caps every morning to help me wake me. I made a decision to walk to the coffee shop instead of making my own at the office. Eventually it started to become a routine for me to walk every morning. (also slowly replaced my need for caffeine)

    Once that becomes a part of your day you can expand on it and slowly add in different kinds of workouts. (jogging, swimming, yoga etc) The key thing I've found is to find a way to motivate yourself to start. For myself it was caffeine so I could function through my long shifts

    The same concept can be applied to many other things.
    Good luck on your goals.
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    I had a hard time dealing with laziness as well. (I do IT work so sitting through 10-14 hour shifts didn't help)

    It all comes back to establishing a routine. Personally I used to drink iced caps every morning to help me wake me. I made a decision to walk to the coffee shop instead of making my own at the office. Eventually it started to become a routine for me to walk every morning. (also slowly replaced my need for caffeine)

    Once that becomes a part of your day you can expand on it and slowly add in different kinds of workouts. (jogging, swimming, yoga etc) The key thing I've found is to find a way to motivate yourself to start. For myself it was caffeine so I could function through my long shifts

    The same concept can be applied to many other things.
    Good luck on your goals.

    Thanks responding. I have a desk job too and an 1hr commute so I think long days contribute to my problem too. But I'm going to like you said and try to start small and build up my activity level. Thanks!!
  • plainjoe81
    plainjoe81 Posts: 53 Member
    Two things have worked for me in your regard, a short 15 min walk is an easy habit to start with. Second setting goals with small rewards when they are achieved with a possible large reward once the overall objective is reached. Make sure you follow through with the rewards.
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    Two things have worked for me in your regard, a short 15 min walk is an easy habit to start with. Second setting goals with small rewards when they are achieved with a possible large reward once the overall objective is reached. Make sure you follow through with the rewards.

    Those are good ideas, thanks!
  • tbpmt
    tbpmt Posts: 4
    There are apps that can help with motivating to accomplish things. For me, it's easier to try to attain goals when I can actually visually see progress (or sometimes lack of, lol). Lift, Habit List, Way of Life, Unstuck,IPro Habit Trackerk etc. are examples of apps that could be used.

    Celebrate the little victories and try not to worry too much about the rest. :)
  • zip_girl
    zip_girl Posts: 29
    There are apps that can help with motivating to accomplish things. For me, it's easier to try to attain goals when I can actually visually see progress (or sometimes lack of, lol). Lift, Habit List, Way of Life, Unstuck,IPro Habit Trackerk etc. are examples of apps that could be used.

    Celebrate the little victories and try not to worry too much about the rest. :)

    Thanks I will check these out!

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