Anyone else "all or nothing?"

Lisa1971
Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
edited September 23 in Health and Weight Loss
This is me. I HATE having this mentality but I don't know how to change it. For example, if I work out hard and then have a slip up I think to myself "well, screw it. I already ate the potato chips so I might as well eat a cheeseburger now." I HATE thinking that way! Or if I don't work out I think "well, I haven't worked out so my day is shot. Might as well have a cheesesteak for dinner."

How can I get passed this way of thinking??? It makes me CRAZY!

Anyone else like this???? Please help!

Replies

  • Mhaney
    Mhaney Posts: 467 Member
    i am not personally like this, all I can do is tell you what I do.. it takes a lot of kicking your own butt... If I want something that is over my cal intake I make myself do a short workout to earn it, even if I already worked out earlier. I know not everyone can make themselves NOT eat whatever it is they are craving, tho.
  • OLP76
    OLP76 Posts: 768 Member
    Like everythin' in life...You have to train yourself...Someone said I saw on another post - If you're thinkin' about havin' somethin' bad - try to focus your mind onto somethin' else...I wished I saved it. Try the trick of havin' a glass of water, and maybe your mind will think its full...or have some cut up veggies in the fridge waitin' for that time, when you want to have chips or a cheeseburger...
    I'm DAY 43 of Power90 and chips, junkfood and fastfood were my weakness...it took me to January to NOT to crave into my local fastfood. My body and mind has learnt that junkfood and fastfood are BAD...best wishes my friend xo
  • I have the same way of thinking. And since will-power is not my strongest suit :laugh: , I have huge issues with it.

    I'm HOPING that actually logging in my food at every meal is going to help me see that one slip up isn't ruining the day completely. My plan isn't to slip (of course..) but for example - I KNOW I am having a peice of birthday cake because there will be a 40th birthday here tomorrow. I think seeing the calories added to my daily log will help me "adjust" the rest of my day. It will "inspire" me to do an extra 15 minutes or so on the treadmill. Or have a lower calorie dinner. Does that make sense?

    Of course, I say that now, and I may go home and eat a cheeseburger, but I hope not.
  • MelissaL582
    MelissaL582 Posts: 1,422 Member
    This lifestyle is a huge change for us because we used to cave in and gave up. For me, I get motivated by coming on here and seeing all my support buddies workouts for the day or seeing their food diaries. I start thinking to myself..if they can do it, I can do it too. I want to prove to myself that I am not a failure and give up to little things. I'm stronger than that. Last night I had a couple slices of pizza and I felt so darn guilty, that I worked out while watching the Biggest Loser. I want people to look to me for inspiration instead of another person giving up another weight loss journey.

    You can do this and you will do this..stay strong.
  • LChabot86
    LChabot86 Posts: 12 Member
    Ive been like that since December. I was on the right track and now all of a sudden i cant get back into it. I think well i just ate a chocolate bar theres no point in working out, might as well eat something else too.. I know exactly how your feeling. Its all about will power tho. Motivation and will power are key, We can do this!!!! Good luck
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    Treat it lightly. So you screwed up one day. So what?

    There's always a new day the next day for you to get back on track. A key to losing this weight is to forgive yourself when you screw up and get right back on the wagon the next day.
  • jr1985
    jr1985 Posts: 1,033 Member
    Me!!! at least I used to be... I'm really making a consious effort to look at this weight loss journey as a marathon and not a sprint, which is helping a lot! you will find that logging EVERYTHING you eat makes you be a lot better at that too... I used to be just like you and think, well the whole day is shot, might as well do whatever I want... but now I see how many calories are in that piece of chocolate cake... and how long it takes me to burn off those calories, and it makes me want to be a lot better about what I eat... I still allow myself to have treats, but I 'budget" for them, and try to know how many calories it is going to be before I eat it, and see if I still have room in my calorie allotment for the day before I eat it. Lower calorie snacks like 100 calorie popcorn and sugarfree fudgesicles help a lot too :)
  • quara
    quara Posts: 255 Member
    Here's analogy: "Oh crap! I missed that stop sign and drove right through it. Welll... I've already broken the law, I might as well go break some storefront windows, kick an old lady and then rob a bank!!"

    It doesn't make any sense... and neither does throwing all your good work out the window when you make a tiny slip-up!! Try to think of this next time you eat the potato chips.... that's just the stop sign :)
  • oddyogi
    oddyogi Posts: 1,816 Member
    I think I used to be like that. I've had to gradually build my willpower against food up as I've started making healthier decisions. Before, if I was already having a bad day, I'd say screw it and eat the Reese's Tree (Christmas time), and just start over the next day. Or if it was a Friday, I would say screw it, I didn't do anything good this week anyway, and tell myself I'd start again on Monday. It was a vicious cycle.

    For me, the turning point was going home over New Years and seeing my aunt. She had lost a large amount of weight (anywhere from 60-80 lbs, not sure exactly), all from just counting calories and exercising. It made me realize that I have all the tools I need to meet my goal, and all I had to do was put it in motion. It was up to ME and me alone.. and once MFP came into the picture, it put me from first to second gear.

    My suggestion to you is make a list of all your tools you have. Number one could be MFP. Others could be your knowledge of food facts, weight loss tips, and different exercises you could do. If you don't know much about one or more of these things, research them and add them to your mental toolbox!

    Once you find your turning point, it's all up to you, and the community of MFP is here to support you the whole way. Feel free to friend request me, and if you ever feel like you've messed up and you just don't care about the rest of the day, MESSAGE ME! I'll talk you out of it. :-)
  • laddyboy
    laddyboy Posts: 1,565 Member
    Each meal is a battle, to win the war you have to win more battles then you lose. Be tough, hang strong and WIN, WIN,WIN.
  • beth04
    beth04 Posts: 1
    yep.. im the same way.... whats worse is last march i started eating right and exerising and lost 40 pounds.. i looked good got down to even a size 8 in levi jeans.. i was so happy.. now here it is jan.. and im almost right where i started.. i stopped excerising and began eating like crap.. so yes i understand... id work out then slip up and say.. ill be better tomorrow.. but then tomorrow came and i did the same thing... so now here i am.... tired of looking at my self in the mirror... i see fat back on my face.. i want to hit my goal by my birthday in may... and with everything i have... and i will have to dig deep... i will do everything i can to not graze or slip up this time.... goood luck in your journey
  • MochaMixAZ
    MochaMixAZ Posts: 844 Member
    I can't help you get past it, but I can understand - I'm the same way. My switch is either ON or OFF - there is no in between. I'm either perfect when it comes to diet/exercise (or excessive)... or I'm really off track.

    The way I've been able to cope with slip ups is to say to myself, "Ok. That was a bad choice. You really flubbed that up. Now get back to being on track, NOW!" LOL I had a very wise friend once say something brilliant to me as she watched me self-talk myself into a bad of chips, followed by a cheesecake, followed by not exercising. She said, "So, if you ran a red light as you were leaving your house, would you continue to run red lights all day long? All week long? For the rest of your life?" Naturally, my answer was NO. So then she asked, "Well then, why would 1 food mistake spoil your entire day and make you think you've failed?"

    That made me go "huh...." And now, it seems to help me out when I'm at that "Might as well have cheesesteak for dinner" track.

    Good luck!
  • laddyboy
    laddyboy Posts: 1,565 Member
    Here's analogy: "Oh crap! I missed that stop sign and drove right through it. Welll... I've already broken the law, I might as well go break some storefront windows, kick an old lady and then rob a bank!!"

    It doesn't make any sense... and neither does throwing all your good work out the window when you make a tiny slip-up!! Try to think of this next time you eat the potato chips.... that's just the stop sign :)

    Oh My, you don't kick old ladies do you? LOL....love your analogy.
  • 100crunches
    100crunches Posts: 3 Member
    You should give yourself credit for realizing this as a problem. I unfortunally have the same issue. What I do when I see this coming is I journal, I write it down. I write, the exact thought at the exact time "screw it I already at like crap or didnt eat at all today" then I write what I should do "its ok that I sliped a little, It does not redefine me or my goals, I will make healthier decisions for the rest of the day." Just keep writing about how good you will feel when you make the right choices!!!!!
  • 2hdesign
    2hdesign Posts: 153
    I've done that a lot in the past - I believe it 'helped' me put on some of the extra weight.

    In the end, tough love. Tell yourself no. Tell yourself it DOES matter. Chips, chocolate - opps, 500 extra calories. STOP there. Why? Because depending on where made/how prepared that burger could be anywhere from 300-1400 calories. Then you would feel horrible. At least with the overdone snack, you can chaulk it up to learning experience, dust yourself off and do better tomorrow.

    Last night, I really, really, really wanted to order pizza - I had a bad, stressful day at work. I came extremely close to ordering Papa Johns. But I know if I did, I would consume close to 1500 calories in one meal (if not more). So I refrained and practically cried and made my planned dinner - Lemon Pepper Shrimp Scampi (which was wonderful! mmm (http://find.myrecipes.com/recipes/recipefinder.dyn?action=displayRecipe&recipe_id=10000001880014). Since I felt deprived, I had a little extra. Sure it cost me 200 extra calories, but that's better that 1500 extra calories. And I felt good for having made the better choice.

    Sometimes it's about the baby steps (and maybe I should go watch 'what about bob' again). You can do it!
  • CJWirth09
    CJWirth09 Posts: 24 Member
    That is me in a nutshell and it is exactly what I feel and think everytime I go thru this process. My "all or nothing" happend more after a long period of time though. For example, I will workout and eat really healthy for about 3 months or so.....lose the weight I was aiming for and be really proud of myself. Then, for example, a weekend will come where I don't do so good...eat pizza, have too many drinks and junk food, and then I just stop and it spirals out of control from there and I gain all of the weight back in usually half the time it took me to lose it. :ohwell: I have done this repeatedly now for a few years and I NEED to break this cycle. I need to learn to go back on the wagon after a bad day or weekend and not just say "Well I screwed up now its all over". I am hoping this time around I can have a bad day and continue without letting myself slip back into the bad habits.
    I wish you luck in your journey!! Thanks for letting me vent! :happy:
  • samb
    samb Posts: 464 Member
    Honestly, I am a perfectionist, and that is sort of the perfectionist mentality....either you do it perfect or you "fail". I am currently working to overcome that mentality as well. All you can do is your best. Some days you are going to slip up...because no one is perfect (I am telling myself this as well while I type haha). Your mentality needs to be more like.... "I understand I cannot always be perfect, but as long as I try my hardest, and ALLOW for some room for error (endulge once in a while), I can accomplish anything I set my mind to." Because really, you can do you anything you set your mind to. No one is perfect and everyone needs to endulge in the good parts of life once in a while. If you are on a "diet", I would suggest giving yourself an allowance of calories for the week to endulge in foods that are not as healthy. Or try to make the foods you crave into a healthy combination, or make and eat a small portion of it to make your cravings go away. I also opt for the healthier treats when I can, such as Smart Ones desserts (they are delicious and only ~170 calories!) I would also suggest making realistic goals and increase your goals as time goes on. If your goals are highly attainable then you may be more motivated to complete them than if you know they are crazy and you don't even want to try sometimes. The best ways for me to get out of that mentality is to constantly tell myself I want to make the most of life and in order for me to do so...I need to work as hard as I can at the things that matter, I set 2 or 3 things as my top priorities and try to only focus on those things except in my "free time". If I am doing my best, and understanding that it is okay to slip up once in a while as long as I don't do it everyday, then I know I am on the right track, and can fulfill my goals, WITH TIME. I am the type of person to be all or nothing, get it done quickly or not at all. But I am working my way out of that....it is hard but you can do it!
  • samb
    samb Posts: 464 Member
    That is me in a nutshell and it is exactly what I feel and think everytime I go thru this process. My "all or nothing" happend more after a long period of time though. For example, I will workout and eat really healthy for about 3 months or so.....lose the weight I was aiming for and be really proud of myself. Then, for example, a weekend will come where I don't do so good...eat pizza, have too many drinks and junk food, and then I just stop and it spirals out of control from there and I gain all of the weight back in usually half the time it took me to lose it. :ohwell: I have done this repeatedly now for a few years and I NEED to break this cycle. I need to learn to go back on the wagon after a bad day or weekend and not just say "Well I screwed up now its all over". I am hoping this time around I can have a bad day and continue without letting myself slip back into the bad habits.
    I wish you luck in your journey!! Thanks for letting me vent! :happy:

    I feel you! You are not alone! I am working on that as well!! Good luck :)
  • bslclay
    bslclay Posts: 55 Member
    Here's analogy: "Oh crap! I missed that stop sign and drove right through it. Welll... I've already broken the law, I might as well go break some storefront windows, kick an old lady and then rob a bank!!"

    It doesn't make any sense... and neither does throwing all your good work out the window when you make a tiny slip-up!! Try to think of this next time you eat the potato chips.... that's just the stop sign :)

    Like it! I'll have to start using that')
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