Has anyone told you to stop losing weight?

I hit my first goal weight this week, 150, and I'm now teetering around 148. I was going to go to 145 and then possibly to 140 but literally THREE people came up to me today and told me to stop losing weight. I could not believe how uncomfortable I was. What's their reasoning? I still think I have work to do and weight to lose. But how do I know when enough is enough?

Oh, and I should mention a friend tried to make me feel better by saying "Don't worry, you are in NO WAY skinny"....Maybe everyone should just mind their own bees wax and I should keep doing my thing.
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Replies

  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    You consult with a physician and/or a dietitian, who can give you correct goals for weight loss.

    Honestly though, it's no one else's business. Is your weight loss journey something you've discussed with these particular people before? They may they have the right to say something if you have.
  • Hey, i have the same problem, I was always around 107 lbs and during summerI somehow went to 115, not only everyone thins i'm an idiot trying to lose my weight gain, they say it was a good thing, since I was 'too skinny'. My goal hovever always was 100 so hopefully, one day... I'd say it's too low when your BMI is below 18.
  • smarieallen85
    smarieallen85 Posts: 535 Member
    You consult with a physician and/or a dietitian, who can give you correct goals for weight loss.

    Honestly though, it's no one else's business. Is your weight loss journey something you've discussed with these particular people before? They may they have the right to say something if you have.

    No, you're right. I think they're just sticking their noses where they don't belong. It did make me wonder though.
  • quarkenstein
    quarkenstein Posts: 60 Member
    It may be different reasons. people may be jealous of your success. People may just not be used to seeing you skinny. People don't like change! In America, the standard is to be overweight. Who knows? As long as you're healthy and not exhibiting disordered eating, don't worry about it. Evaluate if these people think you're starting to look sickly or are concerned by the type of foods/quantity you eat. For example, if you have coworkers that are concerned, and you never eat lunch anymore, then people could be concerned. If you eat a well balanced meal with protein and veggies and good fats in front of them, then most likely they are being petty.
  • BramageOMG
    BramageOMG Posts: 319 Member
    1. I think we get used to seeing someone as they "were" and the drastic change is uncomfortable
    2. Per medical guidelines, our "normal weight" is lower than what most people consider to be "normal" I am 6' 0".. To be normal weight on the high side, 185 is where I need to be. I am a twig at 185. 165 would be my mid-point, I would be able to hide behind a pencil.

    So I think it just comes down to perception.. Get where you want to be, and they will get used to your new size. :D
  • Kita328
    Kita328 Posts: 370 Member
    Its no ones business but you and your health provider.
  • kimnsc
    kimnsc Posts: 560 Member
    As long as it wasn't my husband, close family or friends I would tell them to mind their own damn business. As far as a healthy weight I would consult with a physician or dietitian to ensure you stay in healthy ranges. Other than that....tell 'em to kick rocks.
  • PrincessMissDee
    PrincessMissDee Posts: 183 Member
    That's just one of those things people say when they see a difference. Looks like you weren't massive to begin with so they're used to see you in a certain away and I guess it means the loss is showing!

    Do these people matter to you? I'd say it's only worrying when the people you really care about say it.

    They probably mean no harm, people just say things flippantly without realising it's a huge deal to us.
  • smarieallen85
    smarieallen85 Posts: 535 Member
    Its no ones business but you and your health provider.

    Love your hair.
  • smarieallen85
    smarieallen85 Posts: 535 Member
    Thanks guys!
  • aarnwine2013
    aarnwine2013 Posts: 317 Member
    This just happened to me last week. It surprised me because I just hit my goal...

    I just ignored it. I have about 10-15 more to lose and I plan on staying at it despite what people say. I think people are used to seeing the old me and since the weight loss, I look different. It could be the same for you. Congrats on your loss!
  • I think body fat and height matter more than weight - if you're still within a normal body fat percentage then its fine. I can't find any of the sites that talked about BF% ranges for an athletic build, normal, etc so sorry I can't give specifics.

    As for anecdotes, I know I got a lot of "you're too skinny, eat more" when I was younger, but my BF% was a bit low and I had zero muscles...so I looked pretty spindly. I still am getting a lot of "You don't need to work out" despite being at 33% body fat.

    Congratulations on hitting your goals and don't worry about the haters if you're within healthy ranges.
  • QAPmom
    QAPmom Posts: 458 Member
    Yes, my 7 year did, told me I am perfect just how I am. :)
  • laineybz
    laineybz Posts: 704 Member
    I've had a few people tell me to stop losing weight. I already have stopped. I don't want to lose anymore, i'm maintaining but wouldn't be apposed to gaining a few lbs. I just don't need people (who are not close friends or family) giving me their input.

    From your pics, you have a lovely figure. You'll know when you've lost enough.
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  • smarieallen85
    smarieallen85 Posts: 535 Member
    Yes, my 7 year did, told me I am perfect just how I am. :)

    Oh my god. Love kids....

    Though before my weight loss one of my 5 year old students was playing with my arm fat one day and saying "Wow...you're so mushy!"
  • sculli123
    sculli123 Posts: 1,221 Member
    My wife used to complain when I would either cut or bulk. She just like the in-between times. She gone!
  • WonkaCat
    WonkaCat Posts: 42
    One thing I have come to realize is that no matter what you weigh or what size you are, someone, somewhere will think it should be different and fit into what THEY feel is correct for another person. I'll never be able to fathom how people can just randomly give you their opinion on what you should weigh or how you should look. Mind boggling really and none of their business. It's one thing if you ask for input but when people have to throw in their ideals, that's just wrong.

    Do what's best for you and file other people's unwanted and unsolicited opinions in the Useless and Pound Sand file. :happy:
  • getitamb
    getitamb Posts: 2,019 Member
    Yeah I got it a lot. That was my main reason for starting to lift
  • slomo22
    slomo22 Posts: 125 Member
    I hit my first goal weight this week, 150, and I'm now teetering around 148. I was going to go to 145 and then possibly to 140 but literally THREE people came up to me today and told me to stop losing weight. I could not believe how uncomfortable I was. What's their reasoning? I still think I have work to do and weight to lose. But how do I know when enough is enough?

    Oh, and I should mention a friend tried to make me feel better by saying "Don't worry, you are in NO WAY skinny"....Maybe everyone should just mind their own bees wax and I should keep doing my thing.
    You should smack those people. Violence is always the answer.
  • missrobeena
    missrobeena Posts: 11 Member
    So far my mom has been the only one to tell me to stop (she thinks that measuring and weighing food is crazy... but she's also a lot heavier and has been for a long time) but I've had friends that have found ways to subtly damage my progress.

    I had a friend visit recently who knew that I was running and keeping track of my food. She kept trying to guilt me into eating everything that she ate (which was a LOT. This girl is big.) and pulling the "We're on vacation! Why are you doing all that? There's no point and we're going to have tons of food at Christmas anyways (My family does Christmas in July, complete with a full turkey dinner with all the fixins'.)

    There was an "all you can eat Tapas" at a spa that we went to and I ended up retaining a lot of water (about 2lbs worth) because of all the sodium. When I was being extra careful the next day to drink enough water, she wouldn't stop giving me ****.

    Eventually I put her in her place and told her that my goals aren't going to happen by accident and that she needs to get off my back. I know that she's jealous, but I refuse to let that jealousy make me feel bad for the progress I've made.

    tl;dr Friends on vacation are *kitten*.
  • mzfrizz15
    mzfrizz15 Posts: 135 Member
    @OP- Only listen to the advice of your doctor or dietician. All others can kindly mind their own business.

    Congrats and best of luck on your journey! :smile:
  • I totally agree with you! I am at 147 and working my way down to 140 and hopefully back down to 135. Which is where I was back in high school. People tell me I don't need to lose anymore, ***** back off its my body and if I feel I want to lose I will. Mind their own damn business! Seriously it pissed me off when people tell someone to stop losing. Like, one girl I use to be friends with tried to tell me to stop losing, I wasn't done with my damn journey. Basically she said that to me because I was actually losing and she was still a ****ing fat *kitten*. Jealous much? Yeah, I think she definitely was. It was completely obvious.
  • I hit my first goal weight this week, 150, and I'm now teetering around 148. I was going to go to 145 and then possibly to 140 but literally THREE people came up to me today and told me to stop losing weight. I could not believe how uncomfortable I was. What's their reasoning? I still think I have work to do and weight to lose. But how do I know when enough is enough?

    Oh, and I should mention a friend tried to make me feel better by saying "Don't worry, you are in NO WAY skinny"....Maybe everyone should just mind their own bees wax and I should keep doing my thing.
    You should smack those people. Violence is always the answer.

    Amen!!!????
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    It may be different reasons. people may be jealous of your success. People may just not be used to seeing you skinny. People don't like change! In America, the standard is to be overweight. Who knows? As long as you're healthy and not exhibiting disordered eating, don't worry about it. Evaluate if these people think you're starting to look sickly or are concerned by the type of foods/quantity you eat. For example, if you have coworkers that are concerned, and you never eat lunch anymore, then people could be concerned. If you eat a well balanced meal with protein and veggies and good fats in front of them, then most likely they are being petty.

    I agree with all of this.

    I still weigh 175 at 5'8", definitely an overweight lady...I've had people who knew me in my teens saying I should stop right away and even that my loss is "disturbing" and I honestly think it's because I was much bigger at sixteen than now at 37...they don't know a thinner version of me so it's weird to them. That is their problem, not mine.

    But yeah -- I do think it's good to listen to those who may be concerned about your health, just to see if their comments have ANY merit. I had a coworker in her 60's who had always been obese, and after getting to a healthy weight through moderate dieting she developed some seriously bad habits like drinking Diet Coke all day and not eating food. I suspect her dinners weren't much either. Anyway, it was thanks to her concerned coworkers that she sought counseling and avoided more trouble down the road.
  • deannasueknutson
    deannasueknutson Posts: 38 Member
    I had a friend tell me that I shouldn't lose any more weight. We were talking about working out and she just randomly said it. At that point, I had lost about 8 lbs. Of all my friends, I am one of the skinniest of the bunch. Not saying that I am close to being skinny, but you know what I am saying. I think it's because compared to her and a couple other friends, I am considered small. There is probably some jealously as well. I have heard her say that she is overweight and she's afraid because of that she might not be able to have children one day. I am sure she wants to lose some weight, but doesn't have the drive to do it.

    Like many others have said, talk to your doctor. They are one the best people to talk to about your own health. My doctor and I figured out a plan together on what is good and what isn't. My doctor gave me a range that I should be in regarding weight. When I get close to there we are going to reevaluate to make sure everything is going right.
  • MzHornedOne
    MzHornedOne Posts: 71 Member
    People used to say this to me all the time when I was losing weight! It's SUPER annoying.

    I think it makes people uncomfortable to see someone get too successful! If you're not anorexic that screw that they say! They have no right to tell you what to do.

    Congratz on hitting one of your goals and go as far as you think you can go while staying healthy. It's your body :)
  • california_haley
    california_haley Posts: 220 Member
    people used to tell me that all the time its really irritating.
  • sassyjae21
    sassyjae21 Posts: 1,217 Member
    My grandma just made me really uncomfy asking me why I was losing weight. She was pretty annoyed with me lol. Was I trying to?? After I said yes, she told me to stop it. I just laughed at her and said OK grandma. I love my grammy so it doesn't bother me. Plus she's 90, so I do what she says. Never mind the fact that I'm at goal anyway.:drinker:
  • hoktauri
    hoktauri Posts: 24 Member
    I have people tell me that I don't need to lose weight, it's normal for guys to be a little over. Considering I'm about 40 over the average for my height I think I need to keep moving down.