Friends who tell you you don't need to lose weight

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Replies

  • kbh1218
    kbh1218 Posts: 7
    It makes them feel better if they aren't eating the fried food and drinking beer by themselves.


    ^^Bingo. Just what I was going to say.
  • Snail_Whale
    Snail_Whale Posts: 21 Member
    I don't have any friends so it's not a problem ;-)

    Ditto, lol.



    I just don't say anything to family, either. They don't need to know.
  • missemmibelle
    missemmibelle Posts: 100 Member
    Sometimes losing a significant amount of weight is like starting a family, traveling as a hobby or rooting for the Cowboys.

    Your relationships change along with your waistline.
  • Anita4548
    Anita4548 Posts: 39 Member
    Oh my god. I get this response all the time!! It is really truly annoying. However I never listen to them anyway :) Good luck with your weight loss !!
  • ekat120
    ekat120 Posts: 407 Member
    I don't have any friends so it's not a problem ;-)

    Ha! This!

    It took me a lot of time and yo-yoing to stop caring what other people think about my weight. My body is my business. Now I'm pretty good about letting it go in one ear and out the other.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    (snip)

    And we're not supposed to respond to someone saying they're on a weight loss plan with, "Yeah, I wasn't going to mention it, but you were getting pretty chubby there, tubby!" So it's the tried and true response to reassure each other that no, we don't need to lose weight, even when we do!

    This is my take on it too. We're conditioned to say certain things - like if someone says "hi, how are you", you say "fine, how are you". This isn't necessarily an honest answer, you could be having a completely ****e day but you say "fine" because that's brief and polite and the other person really doesn't care, they're just asking to be nice.

    So when you say "No thanks, I can't have another beer, I'm still trying to lose weight', they say "oh, don't be silly, you look great!' because the alternative is not only telling you the truth (I wondered when you were going to lose that last 20 pounds) or even worse, facing their own reality (holy crap, I should probably stop drinking too, my pants are getting tight).

    And I also agree with you OP, it may be that, if they knew you when you were heavier, you look a lot better so it's a bit of a compliment. I'm kind of in that same boat. After losing so much, I know I look better than I did but I also know I've got 20 more pounds to lose to get to a technically healthy weight. And I've also learned that one more beer or just a little cake will lead to more and that's a slippery slope.

    The solution is to stop mentioning weight, calories, etc. Just say "no thanks, I'm all set" or "no thanks, I'm full". In situations where you're being pressured about food, you could even go over the top and be like "oh my gosh, it was sooo good and I am soo full. Really, I couldn't eat another bite but thank you so much!" They're be so flattered, they'll leave you be.
  • babbyb1
    babbyb1 Posts: 66 Member
    I just keep in mind that the fact of being overweight and over bmi will lead me to an early death via stroke or heart attack. Most people cant judge what a healthy weight should look like because obesity and being overweight is on the rise. Those people also don't realize that just by losing ten lbs, it will greatly reduce your risks of developing diabetes or if you already have it: will be on the path of getting rid of it, reduce high blood pressure, and add years to your life. Not to mention the energy and confidence I have gained from losing. They aren't in your brain when you are standing in front of the mirror, on the scale or at your doctors so unless they are some type of health experts then don't listen to them. Just smile and nod and change the subject. Only talk about your weightloss endeavors with supportive people. It could be a bit of jealousy on their part as well. You never know how people think. Don't let others lead you off your path to success. Stay strong. Do this for your health and your peace of mind.

    All of this. Do what is best for YOU.
  • babbyb1
    babbyb1 Posts: 66 Member
    Friends who tell me I don't need to lose weight...don't see me naked.
    :laugh:

    So totally this!

    My MIL visited this last weekend, and informed me that I needed to stop losing weight. Which I initially took for a compliment until my hubby told me that she had gone to him and told him he needed to make me stop losing. Makes me crazy. No one cares if you're over weight, but get to a healthy place and suddenly people worry that you're becoming anorexic. Grrrr. Makes me want to do 2 things - lose an extra 5 pounds to spite here, and strip off my clothes and ask her if she still thinks I'm too thin. LOL!

    "My weight loss is monitored by me and my physician. When my physician thinks that I am at my proper weight, then I will go from a weight loss cycle to a maintenance one. But thanks for your concern."

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