Dealing with social pressure to eat more

My mother is from a culture where it's like genetically coded in for her to ask you if you want more food at least 10 times at the end of every meal, I swear. The few times I've watched my calories, it's like waving a red flag in front of a bull.

Best way I've dealt with it is to keep a good attitude and not bother to go into details about what you are doing and why, because that gives them the opportunity to ARGUE with you. It's not something they GET to argue with you about, you know? It's your business what you eat, period.

I have a variety of things i say, depending on what the attitude is.

Like, if it's do you want more food, why aren't you eating more, etc... I would say things like, 'nah, I'm good. I'm not that hungry today, I'm fine right now.'

If they say things like you don't need to lose weight, you look fine? It's easy enough to say things like - thank you for your opinion. Thanks for the compliment, what a nice thing to say, etc... Because this is their opinion, and hey, they're welcome to it. But they're opinion can be accepted for the nice things they mean by it, but it in no way has to impact what YOU eat, or YOUR decision about your body. This can be an easy way to deflect a potential argument.

And if they start trying to get you to eat more, a simple, polite, nicely tones 'no, thank you,' repeated as often as necessary, will eventually do the trick. Eventually - it can take a while, though. But it keeps things from escalating, you know?

Try saying something along the lines of:

- I'm just really in the mood for a salad/veggies today, I love avocado/feta etc. it looks delicious
- My body just doesn't seem to respond well to _______ (insert whatever crappy food they're trying to push on you)
- I had a big breakfast/lunch/snack earlier and I just feel like something on the lighter side

- I ate like crap all weekend/earlier and just feel like something really healthy right now

^ All these work

not to play devils advocate here but if you're constantly making excuses people will start to think you have an eating disorder.
If these people are important to you explain that you are getting healthy and meals like what you're eating a great for that (I assume you're eating big salads and such not a bunch of fast food :laugh:)
If they still don't accept it well frankly it's none of their business you're a grown *kitten* woman. If they keep harassing you I would just be honest and say look your constant nagging is upsetting to me and I'd appreciate it if you'd stop. They might be upset at first but they'll get over it.

Personally I'd stab someone with a fork if they told me I was "okay like I was" um no I'm not I'm 110lbs overweight still. :noway:

not to play devils advocate here but if you're constantly making excuses people will start to think you have an eating disorder.
If these people are important to you explain that you are getting healthy and meals like what you're eating a great for that (I assume you're eating big salads and such not a bunch of fast food :laugh:)
If they still don't accept it well frankly it's none of their business you're a grown *kitten* woman. If they keep harassing you I would just be honest and say look your constant nagging is upsetting to me and I'd appreciate it if you'd stop. They might be upset at first but they'll get over it.

Personally I'd stab someone with a fork if they told me I was "okay like I was" um no I'm not I'm 110lbs overweight still. :noway:

If it really got that bad I wouldn't be going out with these people.

exactly but usually when I tell people that they get really angry with me :laugh:

tell them you are thankful for their concern ,but ARE MAKING positive changes in your life and would love their support. You may have to define what support means to you. If they persist, tell them thanks again but it is time to move on to a subject we will both enjoy. and stick to it. You may have to excuse yourself or end the phone call. this is for you, not them. invite them to join MFP also

I work in an office that is the most food-centric place I have EVER worked. Seriously. Pot lucks, charity lunch events (nachos, hot dogs, pizza, ice cream, etc), food carts, bake sales... not to mention a lady on my team is a very talented baker (and it is her hobby), so she brings in PLATES of things just about every other week! If I ate everything offered to me, I would be HUGE. But still, people sometimes look at me like I have a third head when I don't scarf everything down.

I've found that less is more with explanations, especially if your coworkers are sensitive. I usually just say "It looks delicious, but I'm okay" and leave it at that. If they press "But WHY NOT??" an easy "I just have my own food I can eat" or "Oh, I just don't. Thank you, though!" and keep it as light and cheerful as possible. It gets the message across that I'm not interested without creating an environment where they think I'm trying to be better than them (childish mentality, but we all know it happens with some people).

I guess I just try not to let their questions turn into discussions, unless I know it is someone who is actually interested in a healthy lifestyle. They stop asking questions after a while if they know what the answers will be.

All you have to do is not engage with them in any conversation about your eating. Just don't respond. Or say i don't wish to talk about food and then say nothing else. Leave the room if needs be, saying I've got things to get on with. I need to go. They will get it. And if you keep up this sort of approach, they will definitely stop, more likely sooner rather than later.

I'd also suggest that some degree of rudeness may be essential. and anyhow its not argue that they are being rude by continually pressing the point when you've already indicated that you don't want to talk about it and find their input unhelpful.

I've found the most effective method is to simply say "I am not hungry". People just can't argue with this. If you tell them you're trying to lose weight they will almost definitely give you their 2 cents worth on the matter.