Getting periods back to be weight restored, what about guys?
Aquaburry
Posts: 45
So, I know for a girl to be considered 'weight restored' or 'fully recovered' she has to have her periods back naturally. But what about boys suffering from EDs?
I ask this because I just got my blood work, heart tests, urine tests, physical, EKG, etc...all finished and EVERYTHING is normal (besides a virus but that is separate from weight). I am .2 below a normal BMI, too. I used to have a BMI of 14 two months ago but I started eating more and restored weight.
I have yet to get my period, yet I have gotten signs of it. My doc says that it takes a few months of maintaining your weight to get your period back. So my question is, why does my dietician/nutritionist (who is NOT the same as my doc) say and insist I should gain more weight?
I have healthy vitals, etc...so what is the issue? I am not tired, I look normal, I have body fat, and everyone says I look better and fine. Most importantly I feel HEALTHY for once.
They (doc and nutritionist) even told me I could exercise. So what gives? What is the problem? If I were a boy and I had all these vitals in place and I was at a BMI like mine, completely agile, healthy, and with a clear mind and happy body image, they would likely say "Ok! You're all set. No need to gain more." So why, just cause I am a woman, am I being forced to put on more pounds? To be brutally honest, I don't even want my period back. I have 1 ovary to begin with and don't want children. I can't even handle a puppy, let alone kids. And with all my other mental and financial issues I am not so selfish that I would reproduce as a rite of passage.
So, why even bother getting my period back, right? Seriously I am in my 20's and can't see a time where I would want kids. Now, back to the original question...if I were a boy, the docs would be cool with my weight, so why must I get fatter and fatter for my period?
I ask this because I just got my blood work, heart tests, urine tests, physical, EKG, etc...all finished and EVERYTHING is normal (besides a virus but that is separate from weight). I am .2 below a normal BMI, too. I used to have a BMI of 14 two months ago but I started eating more and restored weight.
I have yet to get my period, yet I have gotten signs of it. My doc says that it takes a few months of maintaining your weight to get your period back. So my question is, why does my dietician/nutritionist (who is NOT the same as my doc) say and insist I should gain more weight?
I have healthy vitals, etc...so what is the issue? I am not tired, I look normal, I have body fat, and everyone says I look better and fine. Most importantly I feel HEALTHY for once.
They (doc and nutritionist) even told me I could exercise. So what gives? What is the problem? If I were a boy and I had all these vitals in place and I was at a BMI like mine, completely agile, healthy, and with a clear mind and happy body image, they would likely say "Ok! You're all set. No need to gain more." So why, just cause I am a woman, am I being forced to put on more pounds? To be brutally honest, I don't even want my period back. I have 1 ovary to begin with and don't want children. I can't even handle a puppy, let alone kids. And with all my other mental and financial issues I am not so selfish that I would reproduce as a rite of passage.
So, why even bother getting my period back, right? Seriously I am in my 20's and can't see a time where I would want kids. Now, back to the original question...if I were a boy, the docs would be cool with my weight, so why must I get fatter and fatter for my period?
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Replies
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This is a question for your doctors/health team - those of us on here {unless we have some doctors, we may} are simply just not qualified to answer these questions.
If it is recommended, it may be for genuine health reasons. And if you think the opinion of your health professional isn't correct, get a second {medically educated professional} opinion. Recovering from an ED is nothing to be taken lightly and those of us on here can offer suggestions however this is a serious issue and the answer needs to come from your health care provider, for your health and your well being now and in the future.0 -
You know I am not so sure about this one. Have you had your hormones tested to see what the levels are? I don't have medical training but I have had amenorrhea from too much exercise and stress and just generally throwing off my body. I have weighed less than I do now and had regular periods for years with no problem but my body is so messed up at the moment they are all over the place. I guess what I am saying is that while I don't think you should be looking for an excuse to under eat again, your period might be a bit more complicated than "just gain body fat" . I would think you would want a good OBGYN who will test all levels and be willing to give you bio identical hormones if needed to get you back on track. Also, unfortunately, stressing about your period will make it more unlikely that you will get your period.
Right now I am having so many problems I am just thinking that being a woman really sucks sometimes..lol...
Hang in there.0 -
This is a question for your doctors/health team - those of us on here {unless we have some doctors, we may} are simply just not qualified to answer these questions.
If it is recommended, it may be for genuine health reasons. And if you think the opinion of your health professional isn't correct, get a second {medically educated professional} opinion. Recovering from an ED is nothing to be taken lightly and those of us on here can offer suggestions however this is a serious issue and the answer needs to come from your health care provider, for your health and your well being now and in the future.
Definitely ask the nutritionist the question of "why". If the doctor said that you don't have to gain anymore weight, I'd be more inclined to believe the doctor. If the nutritionist can't answer this question, I think you should think about switching nutritionists. Perhaps they are worried about the actual amount of nutrients that you are or rather aren't getting yet? Just a thought. Good luck, and hope you arrive at a satisfactory answer from both the doc and nutritionist!0 -
Periods are a neat way of flushing your system of bacteria, shedding your uterine lining and eliminating excess iron, so your doctor recommendation might not be entirely related to ED recovery. Definitely talk with your doctor about it though as only they know why they said what they did.0
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Your body is designed to have a period. Typically, not getting one is a sign that something is wrong (or that you have a baby inside of you). Your BMI isn't the only health metric that matters.0
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Your body is designed to have a period. Typically, not getting one is a sign that something is wrong (or that you have a baby inside of you). Your BMI isn't the only health metric that matters.
To add on, reproduction is a vital life function. It's a huge red flag when your body feels threatened enough to stop it.0 -
Premature loss of menstrual periods leads to osteoporosis0
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If I remember correctly a young woman needs to be in excess of 7 stone in order for periods to click in. Being female demands a different level of body composition to that of the male, they don't, aren't trying to run the same functions. Your body does not know you have no wish for children and knows it has this sometimes overrated need to give you the opportunity to have one. We have a more complex system because of this and it needs to run with a higher percentage of body fat.
I would be more concerned about the lack of mensuration because it can lead to endometrial cancer, something to do with the lack of or irregularity in shedding the uterus lining and the accuracy of cell replacement, it can also happen to those who have a longer or less regular than the average cycle. It is not easy to find symptoms can be imprecise though it is usually slow growing and self contained, normally would not found till you are in your 70s when it could have spread. Such a ling way off for you now but should it hit in your 40s or 50s its not good.0 -
Would all of this matter if i got a hysterectomy? I have already lost half of my fallopian tubes and a whole ovary as a little girl. I have one dysfunctional right ovary anyways, so why can't I just get that removed and call it a day?0
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You'd opt to have major surgery on an elective basis, with all the associated risks, rather than continue to gain a few more pounds? That's something you should discuss wth your doctor and your therapist.0
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They (doc and nutritionist) even told me I could exercise. So what gives? What is the problem? If I were a boy and I had all these vitals in place and I was at a BMI like mine, completely agile, healthy, and with a clear mind and happy body image, they would likely say "Ok! You're all set. No need to gain more." So why, just cause I am a woman, am I being forced to put on more pounds? To be brutally honest, I don't even want my period back. I have 1 ovary to begin with and don't want children. I can't even handle a puppy, let alone kids. And with all my other mental and financial issues I am not so selfish that I would reproduce as a rite of passage.
So, why even bother getting my period back, right? Seriously I am in my 20's and can't see a time where I would want kids. Now, back to the original question...if I were a boy, the docs would be cool with my weight, so why must I get fatter and fatter for my period?
Can we skip the false outrage, pls.
From Wikipedia:
Description Women Men
Essential fat 10–13% 2–5%
Athletes 14–20% 6–13%
Fitness 21–24% 14–17%
Average 25–31% 18–24%
Obese 32%+ 25%+
Women are physically designed to have a bit more fat on them then men, mostly because fat amounts can greatly effect estrogen.
You may choose to keep yourself at a point where you don't get your period, you choice. But there may be other side effects, since you are affecting an essential hormone.Would all of this matter if i got a hysterectomy? I have already lost half of my fallopian tubes and a whole ovary as a little girl. I have one dysfunctional right ovary anyways, so why can't I just get that removed and call it a day?
I don't think you have fully researched the effects of a hysterectomy.0 -
Huh, I never thought about the medical implications after a hysterectomy. Seriously, I have a lot of relatives who have already had such surgeries so I didn't think it would matter. I feel like I've gone too fat anyway and have done so much damage to my body there is no turning back and I need to just end the stupid weight gain and get a hysterectomy. And stop recommending a therapist please I just got in contact with one today and am waiting to hear back.0
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I feel like I've gone too fat anyway and have done so much damage to my body there is no turning back and I need to just end the stupid weight gain and get a hysterectomy. And stop recommending a therapist please I just got in contact with one today and am waiting to hear back.
Yep, obviously your only solution is to have organs surgically removed from your body. I'm surprised each and every reply wasn't a suggestion to talk to a professional.0 -
I wouldn't worry about what other people need.
I wouldn't worry about specific yardstick your doctor is using to make sure that you are healthy - getting a hysterectomy would just make it harder to measure whether you are healthy.
Worry about being healthy.0 -
I feel like I've gone too fat anyway and have done so much damage to my body there is no turning back and I need to just end the stupid weight gain and get a hysterectomy. And stop recommending a therapist please I just got in contact with one today and am waiting to hear back.
Yep, obviously your only solution is to have organs surgically removed from your body. I'm surprised each and every reply wasn't a suggestion to talk to a professional.
People are recommending you speak to someone because you're clearly not ok. I know you say you feel it's unfair to qualify as normal because of not getting a period yet but going to the other extreme and thinking a hysterectomy is a reasonable idea for a 20 year old girl with no current issues is very very clearly NOT ok. Your emotions by saying you got too fat and all that, when you totally are not, are other indicators that you're NOT ok. We're trying to help as best we can, but we are not medical professionals.0 -
I feel like I've gone too fat anyway and have done so much damage to my body there is no turning back and I need to just end the stupid weight gain and get a hysterectomy. And stop recommending a therapist please I just got in contact with one today and am waiting to hear back.
Yep, obviously your only solution is to have organs surgically removed from your body. I'm surprised each and every reply wasn't a suggestion to talk to a professional.
People are recommending you speak to someone because you're clearly not ok. I know you say you feel it's unfair to qualify as normal because of not getting a period yet but going to the other extreme and thinking a hysterectomy is a reasonable idea for a 20 year old girl with no current issues is very very clearly NOT ok. Your emotions by saying you got too fat and all that, when you totally are not, are other indicators that you're NOT ok. We're trying to help as best we can, but we are not medical professionals.
I told you this before and I might have to reiterate again...I already lost half my reproductive organs because I had near ovarian cancer to be more specific. My hormones are NOT only messed up due to weight loss, they are screwed up due to another additional medical condition! So why bother? It might happen anyways, having stuff removed!0 -
No doctor will remove your uterus at your age unless you have cancer in your uterus or something else seriously wrong with it. Trust me, I have uterine fibroids and I wanted to just have them take out my uterus but they won't because I am 1. too young (I'm 30 btw), and 2. I have no kids. Even though I don't want kids, they won't do it in case I change my mind in the future (and saving them from a lawsuit). I've had 3 doctors tell me its not coming out. Which was hard to hear when you feel like you are miscarrying Satan's child and just want the pain to stop.0
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I feel like I've gone too fat anyway and have done so much damage to my body there is no turning back and I need to just end the stupid weight gain and get a hysterectomy. And stop recommending a therapist please I just got in contact with one today and am waiting to hear back.
Yep, obviously your only solution is to have organs surgically removed from your body. I'm surprised each and every reply wasn't a suggestion to talk to a professional.
People are recommending you speak to someone because you're clearly not ok. I know you say you feel it's unfair to qualify as normal because of not getting a period yet but going to the other extreme and thinking a hysterectomy is a reasonable idea for a 20 year old girl with no current issues is very very clearly NOT ok. Your emotions by saying you got too fat and all that, when you totally are not, are other indicators that you're NOT ok. We're trying to help as best we can, but we are not medical professionals.
I told you this before and I might have to reiterate again...I already lost half my reproductive organs because I had near ovarian cancer to be more specific. My hormones are NOT only messed up due to weight loss, they are screwed up due to another additional medical condition! So why bother? It might happen anyways, having stuff removed!
My mother had similar surgeries at 24 years old and did in fact have pre cancerous cells that were removed twice. It's not like I don't know what I'm talking about. Besides, you mentioned earlier in a different post that your thoughts about the hysterectomy were directly related to that being a cause for your weight gain. You're back pedaling and trying to tell me now that the two are unrelated topics when you yourself said something different earlier.
All I'm saying is, it's not normal to want to remove an entire part of your body. And no doctor in the world is going to do it without reason. All medical procedures carry risk, and guess what, the risk increases exponentially if you're overweight or underweight.
And just because something *might* happen doesn't mean you should speed up the process. Anyway, that's a complete derailment of the topic that started. Let's all backtrack.
You said you feel you've done too much damage to turn back. That's not true, it on;y makes the road you have to walk longer. It's hard. Any kind of change is hard. Add in a mental disorder and that increases. Add in the other health issues that may or may not be related and it's even harder. Especially handling things so young. Do you have a support system in place? Family? Friends?0 -
I hope this isn't triggering to you, but the way you're describing recovery, weight gain, and your own health in this thread sounds a whole lot like ED voice. My advice would be to talk about this with your therapist immediately.0
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Actually a woman's cycle is dependent on BF...not weight.
I suspect that is why you are being told to gain more.0 -
Hello Aquaberry,
I have seen a couple of threads from you this week about your ED. You definitely need to talk to your doctor about your situation with your period. If you would like a recommendation from me (a non-clinical, online stranger), I would suggest upping your dietary fat intake as your hormones regulate your period, and it sounds as if that may not have normalized.
Now, about the situation with your ED... while you seem to have conquered the physically damages aspects of ED, I am not entirely certain that you have conquered the mentally and emotionally damaging aspects of ED. Previously, you have been advised to see a therapist. I believe this is a solid recommendation for you. You are on a slippery slope. Physically, you have recovered, but you still seem to be holding on to some of the harmful thinking of your ED that caused you to physically damage your body in the first place.
Addicts and alcoholics will display very similar behavior where they believe they have conquered addiction because they have not used or abused substances for a long period of time and their lives are getting back on track. But at the same time, they still hold on to patterns of thinking that are reminiscent of their addiction. Failing to change those thought patterns can often lead people to a relapse.
I am suggesting, dear, that while you have physically restored your health, your ED is still pervading your mentality, and could potentially cause you to relapse. Please seek some therapy.
ETA: I actually did not read any of the responses before posting this. Aquaberry, I feel like you might be getting overwhelmed with the process. This is also dangerous and triggering for you. Please stop asking the internet for advice. Talk to your doctor and talk to a therapist, perhaps even a psychologist. We only want to see you succeed, but not everyone can deliver the message with careful tact and consideration of your present state of mind.0 -
I feel like I've gone too fat anyway and have done so much damage to my body there is no turning back and I need to just end the stupid weight gain and get a hysterectomy. And stop recommending a therapist please I just got in contact with one today and am waiting to hear back.
Yep, obviously your only solution is to have organs surgically removed from your body. I'm surprised each and every reply wasn't a suggestion to talk to a professional.
People are recommending you speak to someone because you're clearly not ok. I know you say you feel it's unfair to qualify as normal because of not getting a period yet but going to the other extreme and thinking a hysterectomy is a reasonable idea for a 20 year old girl with no current issues is very very clearly NOT ok. Your emotions by saying you got too fat and all that, when you totally are not, are other indicators that you're NOT ok. We're trying to help as best we can, but we are not medical professionals.
I told you this before and I might have to reiterate again...I already lost half my reproductive organs because I had near ovarian cancer to be more specific. My hormones are NOT only messed up due to weight loss, they are screwed up due to another additional medical condition! So why bother? It might happen anyways, having stuff removed!
Death is gonna happen anyway, but people generally want to live. Unless your doc thinks that the removal of the organs would better protect you from the development of cancer, then it's not a good idea. You uterus is in you for a reason, and you can suffer some bad effects when you have a gaping cavity inside you.
Here are some side-effects of a hysterectomy:
Urinary incontinence
Vaginal prolapse (part of the vagina coming out of the body)
Fistula formation (an abnormal connection that forms between the vagina and bladder)
Chronic pain
You think things are a pain for you now? It can get a lot worse.0 -
I already said on my other thread that I am waiting to hear back from a therapist, in the meantime these answers keep pouring in.0
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I already said on my other thread that I am waiting to hear back from a therapist, in the meantime these answers keep pouring in.
Don't like the answer. Don't ask the question.
Obviously you have unhealthy perceptions as to your weight. There is no other advice anyone here can give you. So I don't understand why you are expecting anything different.0 -
Weight/BF percentage issues aside, I'm going to argue with one poster who claimed it's "not normal" to want part of your body gone. So far, I am a very successful adult, I'll be 30 soon, and I have wished that someone would spay me like a dog or cat for my entire life. I have no intent of reproducing and find all the things associated with the normal human reproductive cycle painful, disgusting, and darned inconvenient. I too have been told by (male) doctors that they're smarter and better informed than me and will not do an elective surgery because "one day you'll change your mind." Aside from how chauvinistic, patronizing and insulting that is, it's offensive to me that their opinion of my own body and discomfort is more important than my own. I live in my body. Thank you very much. I know plenty of healthy women who are post-hysterectomy (or ovariectomy, or ovariohysterectomy), and I know that neither my current or future health nor my sense of self reside in my uterus. That does not make me abnormal.
To the end of avoiding the entire bad joke of female human biology, I have been able to get hormonal birth control that stops me from cycling all together, which is a godsend. I agree that normal cycling is a sign of health in females and that not cycling is a sign of problems unless there is a clear, non-health threatening explanation. But I also understand the OP's reluctance to go back to it. Further talks with a doc are probably warranted, but if a higher body fat is recommended for good health, there are still ways to avoid menstruation that don't involve putting your entire body in a stressed, unhealthy state, even if they won't agree to a hysterectomy.0 -
Weight/BF percentage issues aside, I'm going to argue with one poster who claimed it's "not normal" to want part of your body gone. So far, I am a very successful adult, I'll be 30 soon, and I have wished that someone would spay me like a dog or cat for my entire life. I have no intent of reproducing and find all the things associated with the normal human reproductive cycle painful, disgusting, and darned inconvenient. I too have been told by (male) doctors that they're smarter and better informed than me and will not do an elective surgery because "one day you'll change your mind." Aside from how chauvinistic, patronizing and insulting that is, it's offensive to me that their opinion of my own body and discomfort is more important than my own. I live in my body. Thank you very much. I know plenty of healthy women who are post-hysterectomy (or ovariectomy, or ovariohysterectomy), and I know that neither my current or future health nor my sense of self reside in my uterus. That does not make me abnormal.
To the end of avoiding the entire bad joke of female human biology, I have been able to get hormonal birth control that stops me from cycling all together, which is a godsend. I agree that normal cycling is a sign of health in females and that not cycling is a sign of problems unless there is a clear, non-health threatening explanation. But I also understand the OP's reluctance to go back to it. Further talks with a doc are probably warranted, but if a higher body fat is recommended for good health, there are still ways to avoid menstruation that don't involve putting your entire body in a stressed, unhealthy state, even if they won't agree to a hysterectomy.
Good to know!0 -
I already said on my other thread that I am waiting to hear back from a therapist, in the meantime these answers keep pouring in.
Don't like the answer. Don't ask the question.
Obviously you have unhealthy perceptions as to your weight. There is no other advice anyone here can give you. So I don't understand why you are expecting anything different.
Ok, all kidding aside, you come off as very angry and like you have something against me when you comment on ANY of my posts, so it is pretty annoying. If I already told everyone I am getting a therapist, why do they feel the need to comment AGAIN and tell me I need a therapist. That would be redundant. And they could figure that I got enough answers after 10 other people say to get a therapist, I say OK and do it, and then, again and again, someone else says 'get a therapist.' I get it. Why comment the same thing when you can see 10 other people recommended it and I took their advice?0 -
you come off as very angry and like you have something against me when you comment on ANY of my posts
Because you're looking to be offended. Stop it.0 -
Good luck I hope you get better. I don't see what your statements in your OP have to do with under weight men having ED.
But to answer it. A sickly under weight man would probably have jacked up sperm (bad morphology and weird defects) as opposed to have ED/ if a man were to be so under weight and so nutrient deficient as to not be able to have an erection, I would think that man wold be knocking on heavens door so to speak. Kind of like how a women without her period is prob knockin on heavens door.0 -
you come off as very angry and like you have something against me when you comment on ANY of my posts
Because you're looking to be offended. Stop it.
I can assure you, I am not...0
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