Anyone have a spouse who has NEVER had weight issues?

my hubster has gained 20 pounds in 25 years. He just filled out. He is a natural athlete. (grrr) I have gained 100. Problem......He likes me "cushy". I get more food pushed at me than you would believe. He has no clue. I feel your dilemma.. I am not sure how to address the issue. If you come up with anything let me know.

I have one of those. And when he does gain a few pounds he just has to *think* about losing it and poof it is gone a couple of days later. He has no concept of how difficult it is. I don't get any kudos for working out or eating healthy from him, but that is okay because I was the only one who wanted to change how I look.

He loves all junk food, eating out, beer etc. When we go out to eat I always ask for box for leftovers and eat half of the entree. If we order appetizers I have a few bites and he has the rest. If we get beer I will drink half and give the rest to him. I think you get the gist...

My darling husband is blessed with genetics....he has never had a weight issue, and has always been at a perfect weight. He can eat anything he wants and not gain. In fact...he sometimes has to "remind" himself to eat. Seriously?? He is supportive of my continued efforts to lose weight and get in shape, but I know he does not fully realize how difficult that is for some people. His attitude is: "Well, just eat less and work out more...simple". Um, yeah great idea. No ****, right? It would help motiviate me so much if he complimented me more, or said "way to go!" when I get back from bootcamp. He does some times, but I know he's forcing it...he just cannot understand how it could be so hard. He also likes to go out for dinner, as do I, but will suggest appetizers to "share" that I would never eat, such as calamari. This makes it much more difficult for me to stick to my diet plan. He doesn't mean to undermine me at all...I think he honestly just forgets. Anyone else have this issue?

He is blessed, but at the core his comment is correct.

We can quibble the details, but we all lose weight when we burn more energy than we consume.

As for eating out, be firm. Tell him "If you want an appetizer, that's fine, but do not order it with the ideal that it will be shared."

Or go ahead and share, but then order a grilled chicken salad. Most places have some very tasty versions that are quite good foryou. Or lastly just ask for a protein of some type with a side of veggies. There is no restaurant in creation that can't accommodate that.

I am not blessed genetically and completely understand, but at the end of the day we control what we consume and we control what we burn. The rest is excuses.

My soon to be husband has been thin/'average sized the whole time we've been together. He apparently was ~50lbs heavier way before I ever met him, but I've seen pictures and at his height, I don't think he really looked overweight at all, just bigger (he's a taller guy). Like your husband OP - I have to remind him to eat sometimes. He eats/drinks whatever he wants.

I don't think your husband's lack of weight issues has to do with him not supporting you all the time - I think if you had a serious talk with him about "I am/was/struggle with XYZ and it makes me feel like XYZ" and "It would mean a lot to me if I could talk to you about that and just know that you're with me and support me and understand how difficult this is for me" - he might get it. My man has seen me look at pictures of myself and cry, cry after a nasty comment from someone, say awful things about myself after trying clothes on, and he sees how much it impacts me negatively, and how losing weight has made me a much happier person. He may have never counted a calorie, and not have any idea what macros are, but he sees that it is something that I struggle(d) with, and though he may not understand what I mean when I say "BRO I JUST DEADLIFTED 165LBS THIS MORNING!!!!", he doesn't complain if I wake him up when my alarm for the gym does off at 4:40am.

My suggestion is to get a really bada$$ group of MFP friends, share your successes and wins with them. Have a conversation with your husband about support in general, but don't expect him to always be super interested/understanding of the day-to-day things that come with losing weight - that's what MFP friends are for! :drinker:

I think you're just annoyed because "Well, just eat less and work out more...simple" is the truth

Also calamari.

My husband has never had weight issues. He provides me all kinds of unhelpful advice (you look fine, why don't you try eating nothing but watermelon, aren't you planning on losing at least another 5 pounds?) Luckily, we've been married since 1999 so I don't really consciously hear him anymore.

:laugh:

My husband is 50 and he's never had a weight problem (over-weight, that is). Not because he's genetically gifted (well, he is "gifted" - IYKWIM - but that's a different subject) but because he doesn't over-eat.

My husband has never had a weight problem, but luckily he tries to exercise and eat healthily (one of the reasons he's never had a weight problem!). He's seen me struggle long enough to be supportive, although I don't think he'll ever truly "get it." I've learned to be my own cheerleader, which is great because I'm doing this for myself anyway, not for anyone else's approval. One of my new strategies is to "share" food with him, meaning I have a few bites and he ends up eating the rest :devil:

Also, just because it's simple doesn't mean it's easy.

Yes!! We're like Jack Sprat and his fatty wife, lol! He never says it in so many words, but I can tell he REALLY wants me to get a handle on the weight gain, and so do I! But yeah, he's no help at all, though he tries...like many of you have said, he just doesn't get why it would be hard. I just have to look for that elsewhere - like here :-)

My husband has never had any weight problems. He devours sweets, fried goodies, carbs and everything he wants in huge amounts, and his weight usually fluctuates within 2 pounds. Now, I look at what he eats and gain 5 pounds lol However, he always supports me no matter what I'm doing in order to lose weight, no matter what exercise I want to try.. He is very understanding that it isn't black and white for me. In order to help me stay on track, he never brings any junk home. Good luck

I've had exes that can eat all day long; pizza, burgers, ice cream, pasta, loaves of bread- and not gain an ounce. I definitely gained weight when we were dating :P

My husband does have to somewhat watch what he eats. I don't think he is capable of ever becoming obese without trying really hard but he certainly can't shove down food. It makes it much easier for me that he enjoys healthy eating and strives to pick good things most of the time. I also love that he enjoys similar things as I do, like hiking and being outdoors. It would be hard for me to go back to dating someone that can eat whatever they want and as much as they want.

I've known my husband since high school and he has always had this ridiculous beautiful Adonis body. I on the other hand have struggled and still do....and always will at just trying to maintain below 150!

Yes! Sometimes my husband and I get a fast food treat, like Pizza Hut or Dairy Queen, which I enjoy every once in a while. However, I tell him that I don't like to eat that that type of food too often since it contains a lot of calories and isn't very filling. So he tells me, "Well then just eat less of it!"
He doesn't have a problem eating fairly small portions of really high-calorie food, whereas for me, I want to keep eating until I'm full, which would rack up the calories quickly. He doesn't understand why I prefer to eat larger portions of more filling, lower-calorie foods, or why it's challenging for me to eat just a small amount of certain foods.

I think you're just annoyed because "Well, just eat less and work out more...simple" is the truth

Not exactly. When I was younger it was a much more simple formula....once you're "over 40..." it gets a lot harder. I mean, a lot harder. I'm going to bootcamp 3 times a week and have cut my calories down to an average of 1400 per day or less. And it's coming off SLOWLY. When I was in my 30's I could lose 10 pounds in two weeks easy. Things change, my friend.

Hunh??? I'm 42. It's not that much harder?

I'm 51. I was being generous with the "over 40" comment....:-)

My mom is in her mid 50s.. She says she feels better now than in her 30s. She weighed 40 pounds more in her 30s and 40s. She got back down to her college weight of 120 at 50.. She's been maintaining it for a few years now. She's says it's easy when you find something you like during and you learn to eat right ;-)

My husband is 6'3" and looks like a scarecrow--well, a really handsome scarecrow. He eats anything he wants, huge amounts, and never gains weight. The trick is, though, that he never eats anything he doesn't want--I think. It's a mystery to me.

The only problem is that he has continuously made fattening food for me and brought me ice cream, etc., when we watch TV. All I had to do, luckily, was ask him to stop and explain that I had to lose weight to live a longer life. It hasn't happened once since then. He's been completely happy to change how we eat--a lot of salmon now. I really am very lucky.

But watching him eat to large plates of food at dinner mystifies me. I am 100 pounds overweight and he can eat twice as much as I can at a meal!