7 months, 56lbs, and a whole new me (long story, with pics)

I'm not done yet, by any means, but I put together some of these pics last night, and it made me actually break down a little bit to see the change laid out like this, and to see how far I've come. A lot of people have been asking what I've been doing, and how I've done this, so figured it's time to tell my whole story.

Sorry, this is going to be a really long post, with lots of pics, but for the summary, I'm 5'7", 29 years old, SW 242, CW 186 (lost 56 lbs so far!), Initial GW 170 (number I picked on my first day), Final GW will probably be around 140-145 (will figure it out as I get closer).

As of today, I weigh less than I did 17 years ago, on the first day of 9th grade! In the past 7 months, I've gone from a size 20 to a size 12 jeans, which are already falling down, so I might even go shopping for a 10 soon, and an XXL or 1X to a Large, which is already getting a little big too. I've lost 12 inches off my waist, 14.5" off my hips, 6" off my chest, 4" off each thigh, 2" off each bicep, and 1.5" off my neck. My BMI has gone from about 39 to 29.1, and, as of 5 lbs ago, I'm no longer in the obese category, and only 16 lbs away from "normal" weight.


I started my weight loss, fitness, and health journey on January 24, 2014, so just passed the 7 month mark. I work out for an hour or 2 a day, 6 days a week, with 3 days focusing on cardio, and 3 focusing on strength training. I do see a personal trainer once a week, and I can't say enough good things about how much he helped me. I could not even do a single push up when I started; now, I'm doing at least 20 pull ups a day! (and 20 push ups in a row easily, lots of renegade rows, what feels like thousands of squats and lunges, and kettlebell swings until I can't walk! And all the guys in the weight room at the gym have started asking ME for tips and advice! :-D )

I log everything, almost obsessively, here on MFP. I have not cut out any foods, and still eat ice cream, french fries, pizza, and everything else, just not all at once anymore :-) and I still drink beer when I want to, as long as it fits in my day (which sometimes means an extra hour at the gym if I know I want to eat a lot of bad food!). I try to keep protein high-ish (25% or so), and sodium and sugar low (at least the processed stuff - I don't worry when I know I went over on sugar from eating lots of fruit). Breakfast and lunch is mostly protein meal bars (The Simply Bar and SimplyWhey Bars are awesome!), dinner is often chicken or tuna, and I eat popcorn almost every night (brown paper bag with 1/3 cup unpopped kernels, 1 TBSP oil, microwave for 2 or 3 minutes, put in a bowl with some salt, popcorn seasoning, and cayenne pepper - yum!). I try to drink lots of water, but don't go nuts with it - at least 8 glasses a day, sometimes up to 12 or so. My diary is open, for anyone who wants to check it out.

In order to track my energy output as accurately as I try to track my intake, I wound up getting the Polar Loop activity tracker. I love it, and the options it has are perfect for my needs. It syncs with a heart monitor, which I wear for workouts, and is one of the only ones I know of that changes its calorie tracking algorithm when you have the HRM synced, so seems to be quite accurate. It displays activity progress for the day, so you know when you reach goal, calories burned so far, steps taken, the time (it's nice to wear a watch again!), and your heart rate, when you're wearing the HRM. It's also waterproof, so I wear it even when I swim and shower. I personally love that the app even shows how long you slept at night (yes, this means I wear it 24/7, except the 5 minutes a day I charge the thing). Finally, it even tells you when you've been sitting still for over an hour at a time, and reminds me to get up, even just to stretch, throughout the day at my desk job. I'm a math person, so I love having the extra data points, and have come to completely rely on having this info.

For me, this has been a complete physical, mental, and emotional transformation. I am not the same person I was 7 months ago, and I just wish that girl I was in January could see the woman I am today, almost as much as I wish my mom could see me today. Almost 1 year ago, on September 7, 2013, my mom died suddenly. She was 56 years old. I was with her when her heart stopped and she died. She hadn't even been sick. We later found out that she had severely blocked arteries. She was about the same size I was, though I was probably a little bigger, and she was completely sedentary. She was my best, and only, friend. Without her, my only real family is my dad, who I am also close with, but not the same way. He's my parent, while she was my friend. I was completely lost without her. I spent the next 4 months just walking around in a daze, couldn't figure out what to do with myself, or even who I was anymore. I've struggled with depression pretty much all my life, but this was the lowest point in my life, by far.

My breaking point finally came about 4 months later, at the end of January, 2014. I hadn't left the house for anything but work, and I don't think I had even smiled, since September. I don't even know what the trigger was, other than my dad suggesting that I find somewhere to swim, since I've always loved swimming, and that it might help me feel better. So I came across this gym with a pool, that was offering a free day pass to try it, and figured it was worth checking out, and at least going for a swim once. Of course, once I got there, I got the hard sell, with 20% off if you join today, plus 3 free personal training sessions since it's January, and we'll even throw in an extra 6 months free, since it's a day that ends in Y, or whatever. Even with all the deals, it was still expensive, compared to the $10/month gyms that are out there. But I knew I wanted to swim, and I liked it there, and a good deal is always hard to pass up. I also know myself enough to know how cheap I am, lol. I knew I'd have to at least try to get my money's worth out of this place. So even if I only lasted 3 months of going there, I'd be there every day at first, trying to get my cost per day down. Whatever my initial rationalizing, it worked, and within 2 weeks I was addicted.

I had my first personal training session with Adam on January 28. I could go on and on about how awesome he is, and how much I owe him for inspiring me to make the decision to change my life, and to stick to it, and do it right. He was brand new to training himself, had only been doing it for a few months when I met him, and he started after going through this process himself, and losing almost 90 lbs in a year, which he had only just finished about 6 months prior. That alone was inspiration enough, to see this totally gorgeous guy, and to see his before pictures, where he looked about the same size and shape I was in. I knew from day one that I'd be able to trust him, and that he'd truly understand what I was going through and dealing with. I had only planned to sign up for 3 months of training, just enough to learn how to do some things, as I had really never worked out before, and was completely clueless. 7 months later, I don't know if I even still need him, since I'm there on my own 5 days a week, doing all the same things we do together, but I really like having him there, whether for learning new stuff, to have someone to spot me and check my form, or even just a friend for encouragement, support, and to chat with.

I am still shocked every day at who I am now, and what I can do, and how I feel. The weight loss itself may be somewhat linear, but the emotional changes come in such leaps and bounds that they can knock me over at times. I was a depressed, miserable, *****y, fat girl, with no friends, and with no romantic potential, who hated herself and everyone else, and life, and who was terrified of everything. It is amazing to me that none of those are true anymore. I am not depressed, I'm actually so happy I annoy the crap out of myself sometimes! I'm kind and sincere with everyone I meet, have a whole group of friends, and I'm dating everyone! (nothing interesting yet, but I'm getting myself out there, and going on some great dates). I've become fun, and can have a good time in any situation, with anyone. And I'm not scared of living anymore. I'm still cautious, and have to make sure not to be stupid or make bad decisions from being too fearless, but I just feel free, for the first time in my life. My face actually hurts from smiling so much!

My best piece of advice or info or whatever, to anyone just starting out on this journey, from a similar place that I started from, is to have patience, and that small changes do take some time, but eventually build into a cascade. I think of it like weather and climate. My climate before was cold, overcast, and rainy, and just generally miserable. When I started, yes, I had a lot of days of warm sunshiny weather, but a few days doesn't mean much, because, based on the climate, a storm must still be looming. It took 3 months of warm sunny days before I even noticed that a storm hadn't come through in a while, and that it had been sunny pretty much every day in recent memory. It took another 3 months before that information changed my expectations about tomorrow, and started letting me see accurate forecasts, and stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. Now, I expect good days, as that's the new climate, and knowing that is the norm, when a rainy day does come by, I know to just wait, as it will pass, and the sun will come back out again.

Okay, enough of my long story, here are the pictures:

Left is Sept 2013, right August 2014:


January 2014 and August 2014:





Full timeline, pics taken around the 25th of each month, January (day 1) to August (7 months):




Bathroom selfies, January 2014 and August 2014:


(and feel free to peruse all at http://s223.photobucket.com/user/acaciam/library/Weight_Loss - as embarrassed as I am at the early pictures, if it helps encourage anyone, it's more than worth sharing)