Stop, Stop! You are doing this ALL wrong

Goodness – this weight loss thing is soooo easy.
The extraordinary transformation of the Duchess of York from frump to magazine cover girl has made her the envy of millions of would-be dieters.
Sustainable, easy, cheap – I’m now going to swap from MFP to this ….
Josh Salzmann weight loss program.

7.30am Rise.
8am Breakfast of natural yoghurt, piece of fruit, and a small amount of protein such as venison or a boiled egg.
8.30am Talk about the day’s exercises and the stresses of everyday life. Stretching exercises and prepare for Alpine walk.
9.30pm Set out for challenging Alpine walk from chalet. Typically the walk would include long motivational talks.
10.30am Mid-morning pause for snack such as oat cakes or low-fat fish pate. Resume walk for ascent on Alpine summit.
12-12.30pm Lunch, typically hot miso soup from Thermos flask, including broccoli, chicken and tofu. A satsuma or a few grapes.
2pm Return to chalet. Mid-afternoon snack of vegetable smoothie made from emulsified kale, spinach and other vegetables or small amount of fresh fruit.
3pm Deep-tissue massage or resistance training such as press-ups, sit-ups and step-ups. Or ‘Joshutron’ training, in which Josh uses his strength to provide resistance for Fergie’s specially-tailored exercises. More rest.
5pm Supper – ‘pasta’ made from strips of broccoli or avocado with sauce including low-fat meat such as turkey, venison or lean beef. Or fresh fish and salad or strips of lean meat (often venison) and vegetables.
Dessert made from avocados mixed with cacao powder.
6pm Relaxing evening of rest, conversation and board games.
8pm Snack such as oat cakes, fruit or small piece of high cacao chocolate.
10.30pm Lights out – sleep is vital to the programme.

the envy of dieters all over the world … I'm envious anyone for a short Alpine trek?