I just can't lose weight!

Cryptonomnomicon
Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
in Chit-Chat
I joined MFP like a whole two weeks ago so the weight should be dropping off! I even set my calorie allowance to 1200cals a day and set my activity to sedentary! A little back ground information...

• I log every now and then, at least twice a week sometimes more sometimes less.

• I estimate all my portions by sight, sometimes I even use measuring cups and spoons.

• I log my exercise, like yesterday I went for an hour walk and the database said I burned 900cals why would it lie.

• I only eat healthy food and everyone knows that healthy food is negative calories right.

• I switched to low fat which means I can eat so much more and yet I don't lose...actually I might have gained.

• My friends eat all the time and they are skinny and I hardly eat so I have to lose weight I don't understand.

• I've tried paleo, soup diets, shakeology, cut out carbs etc and everyone knows that if you do a special restrictive diet you'll definitely lose weight especially if you aren't enjoying it.

• I pay close attention to what my BeachBody coach and DR Oz are telling me and what I should buy.

• I bought Raspberry Ketones and Green Coffee Bean Extract! Why isn't it working.

• Did I mention it has been a whole two weeks!?!

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For those that lack a sense of humor or are unfamiliar with the threads or are simply looking for answers....

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/ihad/view/an-interview-with-the-most-interesting-man-in-the-world-the-naturally-fit-person-669429

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/833026-important-posts-to-read

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/872212-you-re-probably-eating-more-than-you-think

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/817188-iifym

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1386749-article-review-evidence-based-nutrition-and-supplements?page=1#posts-21046455

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/818082-exercise-calories-again-wtf
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Replies

  • CallMeBacon
    CallMeBacon Posts: 196 Member
    Hey, there's a pill for that..
  • lishie_rebooted
    lishie_rebooted Posts: 2,973 Member
    Welp that's one way to get bingo...
    But I feel like its cheating
  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    Welp that's one way to get bingo...
    But I feel like its cheating
    vKCJwv9.jpg
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
    oh my gosh..i thought this was a real post, and i was ready to jump thru the computer and strangle you..after all, there are actually some people with this frame of mind:indifferent: :drinker: :laugh: :wink:
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    Welp that's one way to get bingo...
    But I feel like its cheating

    well_this_is_awkward.gif

    *coughs and puts the bingo sheet away*
  • kstar0327
    kstar0327 Posts: 54 Member
    You might want to invest in a food scale..........i found weighing and measuring everything really helped me and water water water! Good luck and welcome to the best site on the internet MFP rocks :drinker:
  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    You might want to invest in a food scale..........i found weighing and measuring everything really helped me and water water water! Good luck and welcome to the best site on the internet MFP rocks :drinker:
    Stop being so unsupportive of my gurney, why are you sooooo mean?
  • George_Baileys_Ghost
    George_Baileys_Ghost Posts: 1,524 Member
    I alternate between paleo, prancercise, and shakeweight. If you plateau, go part-time vegan. :flowerforyou:
  • lishie_rebooted
    lishie_rebooted Posts: 2,973 Member
    I alternate between paleo, prancercise, and shakeweight. If you plateau, go part-time vegan. :flowerforyou:

    You forgot the mini-trampoline
  • lishie_rebooted
    lishie_rebooted Posts: 2,973 Member
    You might want to invest in a food scale..........i found weighing and measuring everything really helped me and water water water! Good luck and welcome to the best site on the internet MFP rocks :drinker:

    Whooooosh
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
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  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    I alternate between paleo, prancercise, and shakeweight. If you plateau, go part-time vegan. :flowerforyou:
    Should I eat 8 or ten small meals a day thou? and will prancercise make me bulky? as I heard lifting weights makes you huge and I don't want to look like Arnold Schwarzenegger in a month.
  • George_Baileys_Ghost
    George_Baileys_Ghost Posts: 1,524 Member
    I alternate between paleo, prancercise, and shakeweight. If you plateau, go part-time vegan. :flowerforyou:

    You forgot the mini-trampoline

    DOH!

    She's right.

    Mini-tramps are the best.
  • George_Baileys_Ghost
    George_Baileys_Ghost Posts: 1,524 Member
    I alternate between paleo, prancercise, and shakeweight. If you plateau, go part-time vegan. :flowerforyou:
    Should I eat 8 or ten small meals a day thou? and will prancercise make me bulky? as I heard lifting weights makes you huge and I don't want to look like Arnold Schwarzenegger in a month.

    Nope. P-size is all about graceful, long, lean, dancer's muscles.
  • cmcollins001
    cmcollins001 Posts: 3,472 Member
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  • LaReinaDeCorazones
    LaReinaDeCorazones Posts: 274 Member
    You forgot about herbalife, and not eating after 6
  • LaReinaDeCorazones
    LaReinaDeCorazones Posts: 274 Member
    I alternate between paleo, prancercise, and shakeweight. If you plateau, go part-time vegan. :flowerforyou:

    You forgot the mini-trampoline

    DOH!

    She's right.

    Mini-tramps are the best.
    Lol mini tramps made me think of midget hookers
  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    You forgot about herbalife, and not eating after 6
    Q4bJQAd.png
  • George_Baileys_Ghost
    George_Baileys_Ghost Posts: 1,524 Member
    You forgot about herbalife, and not eating after 6

    That's bro-science!!
  • traceywoody
    traceywoody Posts: 233 Member
    :laugh:
  • harlanJEN
    harlanJEN Posts: 1,089 Member
    Tapeworm brownies w/ raspberry ketone tea - brewed for 3 minutes exactly

    Stay away from Prancercise - you will get HUGE
  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    You forgot about herbalife, and not eating after 6

    That's bro-science!!
    IKR! everyone knows it's 8 pm.
  • George_Baileys_Ghost
    George_Baileys_Ghost Posts: 1,524 Member
    I alternate between paleo, prancercise, and shakeweight. If you plateau, go part-time vegan. :flowerforyou:

    You forgot the mini-trampoline

    DOH!

    She's right.

    Mini-tramps are the best.
    Lol mini tramps made me think of midget hookers

    *frowns* THEY PREFER TO BE CALLED "LITTLE HOOKERS!"
    thatssotrue_10444_1336690789.gif
  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    bump

    Because I am all out of ideas:frown:
  • VBnotbitter
    VBnotbitter Posts: 820 Member
    make sure you eat breakfast to "fire" your metabolism and have you tried garcinia cambogia?
  • j4nash
    j4nash Posts: 1,719 Member
    http://www.universityherald.com/articles/11171/20140901/it-is-possible-to-train-your-brain-to-prefer-healthy-foods.htm

    so what does everyone think about the above study?

    an excerpt:

    "Both groups underwent magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) brain scans at the beginning and end of a six-month period. Among those who participated in the weight loss program, the brain scans revealed changes in areas of the brain reward center associated with learning and addiction. After six months, this area had increased sensitivity to healthy, lower-calorie foods, indicating an increased reward and enjoyment of healthier food cues. The area also showed decreased sensitivity to the unhealthy higher-calorie foods."
  • DenDweller
    DenDweller Posts: 1,438 Member
    I heard ragequitting MFP helps.
  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    I heard ragequitting MFP helps.
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  • Return_of_the_Big_Mac
    Return_of_the_Big_Mac Posts: 474 Member
    Cut back to 1200 calories and quit carbs

    Juicing worked for me... it will work for you
  • FindingAmy77
    FindingAmy77 Posts: 1,268 Member
    bump :laugh:
    don't forget the wish it away diet.. I swear to god my neighbor said she saw on tv that you don't have to watch your portions or count calories or even work out as long as you use visualization and picture yourself smaller. I almost sucked in pool water from trying not to laugh in her face. Mind you we were both in the pool at the time and I was doing my laps while she was just floating around for her once a week "swim" . We have a pool here in our complex but nobody but me uses it... usually. :laugh: :drinker:

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