I can't stick to my calories.

I used to eat up to 3,000 calories a day, or every other day. Completely out of control. Now it's been more than a year and I keep teetering between 1500-2,000. More 2,000 than 1500. My goal is 14-hundred and change. I seem to be eating more calories per meal than I expect and by the end of the day I had gone over my calories. I just had oatmeal made with vanilla soy milk and the calories are 225. I have to space out the calories throughout the day and it's extremely difficult for me to plan ahead. I've started working out just to feel better and stronger and that gives me "extra" calories but I don't know if I should stick to the new calories or the original. I guess I'm struggling and I never post my diary because every day is a "bad" day. Maybe more support would help? Feel free to add me, message me, or whatever, remind me to post my diary, etc. I'm looking for support. Sorry about the wall of text
Amandacheryl (user name)
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Replies

  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    First, you have to want this and it does take work. Try pre-logging your day, as that way you have a plan to stick to (you say its difficult for you to plan, why?). If you're exercising, try adding half of those calories back so you have a little extra in the bank to use.
  • HappilySingle
    HappilySingle Posts: 149 Member
    Now that you realize your problem it is easier to fix!! I would suggest eating breakfast later. Also are you snacking? Pick low-calorie snacks and subsitute one meal for a low calorie frozen dinner
  • murphy612
    murphy612 Posts: 734 Member
    extremely difficult for me to plan ahead

    If I don't plan ahead I'd always go over. You just really have to try and find the time to plan, it makes a world of difference.
  • zichab
    zichab Posts: 1,494 Member
    According to your profile, sll of your inspirations are other people except for being able to wear "skinny clothes." First, you have to want this for yourself and your own health. If you are really 150 pounds over weight, you have too much to lose to be doing it for other people. To lose the amount you have on your profile, you will have to get your eating under control and pre log each day. That way, you will know how many calories you have planned and when. I would not really worry about exercise at this point, Losing weight is 80% food and only 20% exercise. So, change your mindset so you are doing this for YOU and start planning your food each day and stick as close to your plan as possible. Once you get that under control, change your mindset so your exercise is for your fitness, not for "more food." Believe me, that will take about a year so you are in this for the long haul. Having lost over 90 pounds myself after failing many times in the past, trust me, this is not going to be easy. You will need to work at it every day. So, go for it! :flowerforyou:
  • Branstin
    Branstin Posts: 2,320 Member
    Why is it difficult for you to plan ahead? Planning ahead ensures that you meet your nutrient's requirements like carbs, dietary fat, protein, and fiber which keeps you full. I don't doubt life is busy and hectic but you have to make this a priority if you want good health.

    Where did the 1400 and change come from and what is your height?
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    extremely difficult for me to plan ahead

    If I don't plan ahead I'd always go over. You just really have to try and find the time to plan, it makes a world of difference.

    Yep. When you start thinking about getting food, log what you're going to eat (you can adjust the values after), and see how many calories you have left for the rest of the day... so you can adjust the quantities or switch a few things if needed.

    You really need to be able to plan ahead to make it work... even if 'planning ahead' is just leaving enough calories for dinner.
  • Anonycatgirl
    Anonycatgirl Posts: 502 Member
    Here's a big question for you: are you losing some weight at 1500-2000 calories? 1400 calories sounds pretty low for someone your size. For perspective, my basal metabolism at 160 pounds (my starting weight) was over 1300 calories. Considering you're a woman of some substance, 1400 sounds like it might be less than you burn in a day even if you stayed in bed napping.

    For MFP to be as useful as it can be, you need to plan your food to some extent (even if it's just "I know dinner's pasta, so I should have a salad with tuna for lunch"), have some healthy, lower-calorie snacks on hand to prevent snack attacks on higher calorie, less nutrititious things, and log even if you had what you perceive as a "bad" day. But also re-evaluate your goal. You may have trouble hitting it because your body is insisting it needs enough calories to keep functioning--and it may be on to something.
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  • Brolympus
    Brolympus Posts: 360 Member
    You can love what you put in your mouth, or you can love the body you are living in. You only get to pick one. It should be an easy choice if you are really that unhappy.

    Food is just fuel. People get way too attached to the notion of taste. Recognize food as just a necessity and stop treating it like a treat or reward, and I promise it suddenly becomes much easier to eat properly.
  • If you want it, you need the willpower to do it. You have that willpower, you just need to exercise it.

    Planning is the easiest way. Even if you know you're out and about, think ahead about what your options are. Planning and smaller portions should help.
  • mspeppers
    mspeppers Posts: 8 Member
    You can love what you put in your mouth, or you can love the body you are living in. You only get to pick one. It should be an easy choice if you are really that unhappy.

    Or you can love both but make healthier choices. Switch from vanilla soy milk to unsweetened almond milk - learn to kick the sweetness and after a little while your body will adjust!
  • trogalicious
    trogalicious Posts: 4,584 Member
    Maybe more support would help? Feel free to add me, message me, or whatever, remind me to post my diary, etc. I'm looking for support. Sorry about the wall of text
    Amandacheryl (user name)

    More support will do nothing if you're not willing to do it yourself.
    Plan ahead. Only you can do that. Only you will know if you're sticking to it... not your friends list.... no one but yourself.

    You can have a cheering section, and that's awesome... but they will never be the only reason you need to change your habits or put effort into making the change.
  • tbrain1989
    tbrain1989 Posts: 280 Member
    if you pre-log then at least you have the opportunity to change what you are eating,

    if you only log after youve eaten then you are setting yourself up to fail.

    even if you cant plan ahead,

    put the food infront of you before you eat it, log it, then see how it fits into your goals. if its to much then somethings got to give, either an item or the portion size,

    think of calories and counting them like a bank.

    if you put them in there, then you can eat them, if you dont have any in the bank, you cant eat them.
  • rmw10c
    rmw10c Posts: 10 Member
    Work out!! I can almost never stay with my calorie count unless I work out and "earn" some extra calories through out the day. If you aren't at the point where you can handle much exercise, just go for a walk or put the treadmill on a low setting. Every little bit helps. I would also recommend snacking on fruits and vegetables. They'll make you feel fuller on fewer calories than a lot of other snacks.
  • rmw10c
    rmw10c Posts: 10 Member
    Sorry, just noticed that you already mentioned that you've started working out. Definitely feel free to eat your work out calories back if you're hungry. Just make sure you really are hungry and you're not just eating emotionally. If you're eating emotionally, find something else you can do with your time.
  • I could have written this myself. It's all about planning. Make a commitment to planning, and go from there.
  • You can love what you put in your mouth, or you can love the body you are living in. You only get to pick one. It should be an easy choice if you are really that unhappy.

    Food is just fuel. People get way too attached to the notion of taste. Recognize food as just a necessity and stop treating it like a treat or reward, and I promise it suddenly becomes much easier to eat properly.

    "like"
  • FitFunTina
    FitFunTina Posts: 282 Member
    Is the scale moving? If it is moving at 2000 calories, I would not stress at this point. Even if the scale is moving slower than you'd like, if it is still moving downwards, you're making progress. Is your goal too low? Don't be afraid to bump it up to 1 lb a week to get into the routine of reduced eating. Goals can always be adjusted.

    Are you drinking enough water? Are you eating out of stress or emotion?

    This is a lifelong journey. You're not just losing weight, you're learning about yourself, retraining and tweaking along the way.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,029 Member
    If you can't stick to your calories, then don't expect results. Discipline is something you decide to do, it just doesn't happen.

    A.C.E. Certified Group Fitness and Personal Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,603 Member
    Losing a lot of weight is VERY hard work. Do you really want to do that? Because it sounds like you want to be thin, but don't want to do the work of losing. If you don't want to do the work, don't do it! But be happy with your choice! Enjoy your life and your food without the guilt and depression and worrying. Stop beating yourself up. You can start losing when you're ready. The most important thing is to be happy. So make the choice that makes you happiest!! If the thing you WANT is to do all the work of losing weight...

    VISIT A DOCTOR, who can give you a rough estimate of a calorie goal for the day. They can determine if you have physical problems, will tell you what kind of foods you should and shouldn't be eating, and guide you on your journey. Follow their advice over everyone else's. They know more about what you need than your friends, co-workers and Internet friends.

    EAT RIGHT. Your doctor may stress this over a number. A lot of doctors balk a bit at numbers, stressing weight loss as a by-product of healthy living. But they'll give you a number, if you press. :) Cut out the junk food. "Egads! No! I can't live and be happy without my cookies!" Yeah, you can. To paraphrase SamIAm, "Try it, try it, you will see!" After a month, you won't even miss them.

    Your doctor will probably stress a lifestyle change over portion adjustments. Supposedly, it works better long-term and it does make you healthier. Start working in more fruits and veggies - half of everything should be fruits and veggies. Also lean, white meat. Whole grain breads. Low or no-fat dairy. Not so much sodium. Take it slow, but work towards it!

    Save your occasional treat for rare occasions, like birthdays and holidays. (If you celebrate a lot of those, lol, make them very small treats.). Eventually, you will stop thinking of these things as treats and start viewing them as unhealthy food items you don't even want all that much. (It's Ture! Really! I know you don't believe it now, lol, but it happens to everyone who eats well!)

    If you're sticking to a number of calories, stick to it. If you're using the numbers, you have to use them and do that work. It means weighing and measuring all your food. It's a big pain in the butt, but it's necessary. If you want to use the numbers - and I really think it would benefit you - weigh and measure. The first few days will be rough, while your stomach is shrinking and your body is adjusting to the new, lower intake, but it gets easier with time.

    EXERCISE. You say you've started and yay that. Find things you like. Walk, swim, lift weights - whatever you like. Keep doing it. If you find that you no longer enjoy what you're doing, do something else. Just don't take a break. Have the something else decided upon and do it.

    BE COMMITTED. You must WANT it. You must want to do the work. If you don't, you'll fail and send yourself back into guilt and sadness. Do you feel like you actually have motivation? If you don't, put if off to do later, when you are motivated. Either commit to doing it or commit to not doing it. Then live happily with your choice. If you're going to lose weight, commit to seeing the doctor, eating right and exercising.

    Rephrase every sentence that begins with "I can't do it because..." into "I can do this because..." and find an ending. Find a way. Use your imagination. As the nuns used to tell us, "God gave you a brain. Use it."

    BE DETERMINED. If you're determined, nothing will stop you. Not your cravings, not unsupportive words or looks from others. Not anything. Whatever obstacles come up (including a day where you overeat), you'll keep going. You won't say, "I don't feel like getting in the pool today, so I will take one day off." You'll know that one can turn into two and then thirty, so you just won't. You'll be driven to do it, every day. Because you want to succeed.

    When your wimpy self thinks, "I'm too fat for the gym or a bathing suit," the determination will say, "Well, that's too damn bad, because I'm doing it, anyway."

    BE PATIENT. Because Oh, my God. You're going to have to do this work every single day for a year (at least, maybe two years) and although at first the scale will go down a lot, after that you will have to live with doing everything right (working so hard!) and only seeing little adjustments in the scale. Sometimes it will go up a bit and you'll be like, "HOW?! From where?!" Scale fluctuations happen. You have to be patient and wait for the weight loss.

    Also, the more you lose, the freaking harder it gets! If you thought there would be a nice payoff to doing it right and losing your first fifty pounds, think again! The payoff is that the next fifty are harder. I'm about halfway and it's never been harder for me. So, you really need the patience, lol.

    TAKE PICTURES. I wish to God I had done that when I started. It's so important, IMO. Such a huge reward for when you know you've lost, say 50 pounds, but you don't think you look much better and can't believe you look like the Model My Diet girl or how your friends say you look. Plus, then you can show yourself, "I looked like that. I look like this. I did this." When you see no difference in the mirror, comparing pictures will help. I recommend a pic every ten to fifteen pounds. Nobody else has to see them.

    BE FLEXIBLE. Find what works for you. At first, you just force it - the eating well and exercising. It sucks a lot. As time goes on, you'll begin to notice what you like and what you don't. You have to do what works for YOU. Maybe you pre-plan, maybe you take it as it comes, bearing in mind you have to meet calorie goals. Maybe you don't like the gym and would rather walk or bike ride. Maybe you want to figure out your TDEE and do the math and follow that. It's such a long road that changing things up is almost inevitable. Find what you like and stick with that. Everyone has to walk their own path.

    Follow the doctor's instructions, first and foremost. Then, read other people's ideas and stories. Maybe you find inspiration there.

    But no wimpiness and no "I Cant"s and no excuses. Do not coddle yourself and don't give your sob story to others and let their polite coddling be an excuse.

    If you don't want it, don't do it. If you do, then DO IT.

    I wrote more for you than I think I've ever written. So, there you go.

    Good luck.
  • CupcakeCrusoe
    CupcakeCrusoe Posts: 1,440 Member
    As everyone here has said already, this has to come from you. You CAN do this, ban the word "can't."

    Here's how:

    At night, plan out what you want to eat the next day. Start with the meal you enjoy the most. (For me, that's dessert)

    Then plan the rest of your day that way, meal you enjoy second most, meal you don't care about, meal that you can use leftovers for, etc.

    Make sure you're under your calorie goal. (Go to iifym and fill out their calculator for a good estimate)

    Then boom, eat what you planned the next day, and if you change something, change it in your log first to see if it still adds up. If it doesn't work, don't do it or find something else that does.

    Simple. It just takes dedication. Remember, you CAN. Nobody said it was easy, but it's simple.
  • Raynne413
    Raynne413 Posts: 1,527 Member
    You can love what you put in your mouth, or you can love the body you are living in. You only get to pick one. It should be an easy choice if you are really that unhappy.

    Food is just fuel. People get way too attached to the notion of taste. Recognize food as just a necessity and stop treating it like a treat or reward, and I promise it suddenly becomes much easier to eat properly.

    I disagree with this. You can enjoy what you eat (and you should) and love your body. Yes, food is fuel, but you can still eat things that you enjoy. I love the berries and veggies and Greek yogurt I eat everyday. I also love the Goldfish Grahams and peanut butter I eat every day. I think that is the reason people give up, because they think they have to cut out everything they enjoy, and they don't!

    Planning is pretty much the most important aspect to weight loss. It doesn't mean that you can't make changes as you go, but at least you start out with some kind of structure.
  • Fit_Housewife
    Fit_Housewife Posts: 168 Member
    Some really great advice, so I won't repeat what's already been said. If your loosing at 2000 calories awesome, if not maybe try lowing it 100 calories at a time for a week and see how it goes. Also I always try to plan ahead but more so as a guideline. I may plan to have a quest bar as a snack but later decide I would rather have a yogurt and small apple for about the same calories. Write a list of things you like to eat and calorie values, try making a guideline with ideas for equal swaps.
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    If 1400 is too hard for you, aim for 1800 or some smaller deficit that is still enough to lose at.

    I don't plan ahead but I also tend to just choose to save up calories for the evening so it works out ok. And if I 'blow it' by hitting 1500 instead of 1300, I call it a victory because it's still a deficit.
  • ana3067
    ana3067 Posts: 5,623 Member
    If you used to eat 3000cals and maintained on that, then 2400 calories would be fine to stick to as a goal until your weight stalls/maintains for a few months. Then you can assume that is your current maintenance, and subtract another 20% to eat around 2000 cals, and by that time you'd probably be able to stay on 2000 until you reach goal weight (or you can add another 100 or so to lower the deficit and make the weight loss easier on your body).

    This is my plan, once I reach about 165-160 (depending on if I decide to go to 155) then I will be increasing to 2100.

    As some have said, eat what you love but just don't go over your calories. If you've been eating 2000 calories regularly and still seeing results, then stick to it.

    Also if you're using MFP's net method, then change your goals to 1lb/week (changing it to 2lbs will make your intake way too low) and eat back 50-75% of exercise calories that you log.
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    You can love what you put in your mouth, or you can love the body you are living in. You only get to pick one. It should be an easy choice if you are really that unhappy.

    Or you can love both but make healthier choices. Switch from vanilla soy milk to unsweetened almond milk - learn to kick the sweetness and after a little while your body will adjust!

    This will save calories, but soy milk has protein similar to milk, whereas almond milk has almost none. If you want to keep the protein you could switch to lite or unsweetened soy milk.
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    I have to space out the calories throughout the day and it's extremely difficult for me to plan ahead. I've started working out just to feel better and stronger and that gives me "extra" calories but I don't know if I should stick to the new calories or the original.

    Why do you have to space the calories out during the day? Have you been instructed to do so by a doctor, or this is just your preferred method? You should be able to eat just one really large meal, if that is your preference, unless you need to eat regularly to maintian blood sugar levels or something.

    But I think exercising to earn more calories is the right thing to do. If your goal is 1400 and you are eating 1500 - 2000, then the exericse would likely burn enough to put you at 1500 net, more or less. Continue exercising, but don't eat more, since you are already eating more than you'd like.
  • caracrawford1
    caracrawford1 Posts: 657 Member
    Sometimes by saying "I can't" that is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
    You can. Do you want it badly enough?
  • DataSeven
    DataSeven Posts: 245 Member
    I can't stick to my calories.

    Yes you can.

    You have to plan your day around your caloric limit. You can't just eat normally and then check later to see whether or not you've gone over. Going over isn't a surprise that just happens by accident.
  • You can do this. And you can eat almost anything - you just can't eat very much of some things.

    1.Figure out what your trigger foods are. For me it was pasta and ice cream - I could never stick to portions. So I started buying single portion ice cream and I don't make pasta at home. I do think I'll be able to add it back soon because I have a better perception of what amount of food a skinny type person should eat.

    2. You can go out to eat. Order your favorite and ask for a box. Put half of it aside. I was shocked that I was satisfied with half of what I ate before. I'd never ordered a small fry since I've been old enough to order my own food, but guess what. It was enough.

    3. Find snacks that work for you. For me it's grapes, ff pudding, and Graze Box. The max I'm gonna hit even with the sweetest Graze Box snack is 250 calories. Most of them are less.

    4. Plan ahead as much as possible. I will sometimes plan dinner and then eat the rest of the day on whatever is left. I often find myself eating less now for dinner than I thought giving me some leeway.

    5. Don't drink your calories.

    I hope this helps and I hope you keep trying.