This is hard!
momof26
Posts: 83
Dieting is hard and yes, I've lost weight but I have ZERO support from my husband. He's eating and drinking what he wants. He doesn't exercise and I'm in the alone. Well, besides you guys! It's hard to go at this alone but I wouldn't be able to do this without all of you. I feel being healthy is important to me and to my kids. I want my boys to see me eat healthy and exercise and think it's good. I've tried talking to my husband but seems like he doesn't care about y diet. Thank you all for being such great supporters! Today is a down day for me. 
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Replies
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*In this alone*0
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You are so right about this being hard. I am sorry that your husband is not there for you. That makes it harder. Hope your day gets better - oh and congrats on losing 7!!!0
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No Pain No Gain.
You can do this! You have us!0 -
Don't be down!! This is hard and you've lost weight!!
Keep your chin up... 0 -
you are not alone! i feel the same way, but my kids see the difference and want to eat healthy and workout with me. you can do this, just be strong and know that you are doing a wonderful thing for your future. your husband will see it, one day...0
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stay focused on your goal and keep your head up!! I know this is a hard journey to tackle but you are taking great steps by staying connected on myfitnesspal! We have your back!! You can do it!!!0
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There is no reason go be in this alone. And, don't consider this a diet. Think of it as a change in your lifestyle. A way to start eating and living healthier. At the beginning, my hubby wasn't so supportive of me doing this either. I thought that I am doing this for myself, and if he had no choice to accept it or not. This is for me, and I definitely feel a lot better about myself and how I look. You can do this..and if he doesn't support you, then too bad for him. STAY STRONG, AND DO THIS FOR YOU!!!!!! Feel free to add me as a friend, and for support also. Good luck with everything.0
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Just keep going and try not to think about what your husband is doing. I think he'll come around once he knows you are 100% serious about improving your health. Could he be a little jealous?:glasses:0
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It is hard--especailly with kids. I am finding it hard to stay away from some of thier "kid food." Also it is hard to get exercise in when the kids always want to be with me and crawl on me ect. My husband does understand how bad I want to loose weight--but I think he is so use to me always dieting that he thinks that this is just another one. I am doing this for me and for my kids. I want them to be proaud of me when I pick them up from school (in a couple of years). Not embarrased.
YOu can do it---we are here for you.0 -
I totally agree with you that this is hard also! My live-in boyfriend I thought was constantly trying to sabotage my dieting until I finally broke it down to him that I need to be healthy & happy and to do that I needed to get back into shape and lose this weight that is dragging me down. I am also quitting smoking on top of it and I thank God every morning that I wake up to have this app on my phone for my food journaling. By the scale I haven't lost weight but I have lost over 3 inches over my body in two weeks. I'm not always gonna be able to stay strict with the healthy foods 24/7 but I know that most of the time I will and will not beat myself up for cheating on my eating. One day at a time for my food and my smoking. I think that I am treating them both like an addiction so that I don't allow myself to go back to my old ways. Good luck to you and stay strong!0
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I am right there with you! I tried to tell my hubby that we have both gained 40 pounds in 3 years, but his response was that he was trying to gain weight, and has no interest in losing those 40 pounds. Anytime I try to talk to him about my diet and excercising, he tells me I look fine and he doesn't think I need to put that much effort into it. That really bums me out. I didn't really mind his lack of interest, but to not support me is depressing. He loves to send me to the store to buy him snacks. I am grateful to the wonderful people on MFP who have helped me with motivation and inspiration! You can do this!!0
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You're not alone, we're all in this together. Congrats on losing 7! I can't seem to get past 4, lol. 0
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My husband wasn't into the whole healthy thing in the beginning when I started back in May, I kept with it. I couldn't force him to watch what he ate or anything like that. That had to come from him. I do know that I didn't cook anything special for him. He ate what I ate for our together meals. All the sudden three months ago, he signed up for myFitnesspal. He has been interested in food nutrition and healthy exercise ever since. He has lost 18 pounds in three months. I think it just takes some men longer. He may start seeing your results and think whoa, hot momma, I need to look better for her too! Keep going and don't get down on yourself. Take it day by day!! You are doing great!0
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I'm single so have no support either, BUT I do have a clinically underweight 12 year old so have to feed him very differenly than what I eat!. I am often longing for just a taste of his full fat, full flavour meals, but know that I have to think of my health first 
. I find that MFP is a great support system and eventually your hubby may come around to helping you once he starts to see the new you emerging! 0 -
My live in boyfriend isn't exactly a healthy eater either. I have started cooking most of the evening meals and I add a little something for both of us. Usually for flavor I make something with gravy or sauce and I leave the sauce off my plate! When we go out I have learned that if he orders something amazingly delish I take a bite and go back to my salad. I allow calories for that half a chicken tender from the appetizer HA! I get irritated because he can snack all night and doesn't gain a pound. He is supportive in other ways though. We have deals through my goals. When I reach one goal I get a pair of jeans up to $100 and when I reach goal #2 I get $250 in clothing... all as a gift from him. He is supportive just not with his eating habits 0
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:grumble: I feel for you.:noway:
While my husband doesn't say anything against or for my losing weight/counting calories, he doesn't want to join me or eat anything other than what he likes/is used to having and rarely comments on my weight loss. I'm not sure it matters to him whether I'm heavy or not so I don't worry too much about how he feels about it!
I just do it for me and really, for my kids. I like to be an example. Maybe they won't follow my lead 100% now but they watch what I do (especially my two teen daughters) and later on, I'm sure they will remember that mom ate healthy and not a lot of junk and worked out like 90!
I cook foods for everyone and just alter mine a bit or have smaller portions/add more veggies to mine.
I have begun to really watch what my son eats as well as he tends to get fed sweets too often by the rest!!
You first! This is about your body! This is your time to do what you want for yourself. Don't give up. I can feel your pain. It is hard. There are days like this when you get down but just think how you'll feel tomorrow when you got through this day and you're doing great!!!! Keep posting for support - this site is awesome for that! :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:0 -
It really helps to have a work out buddy but it doesn't have to be your hubby! My boyfriend just plays on the computer when I'm working out and gets annoyed that the foods I'm making are making him lose weight (He's tiny). You don't need your hubby to do this! Do it for you! When he sees how hot and skinny you are he'll want to start working out too.0
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I lost quite a bit of weight a couple years back and my husband never said anything about it, though he was fairly supportive of changes I made, I never thought he noticed and I'd lost over 20lbs. I got really discouraged and quit doing the things I needed to be doing and gained it all back and then some. I later realized I wasn't doing it for me I was doing it for him and he didn't care. I asked him about it and he said he loves me no matter what and didn't want to say anything because he was afraid I'd think he was saying I was fat before and he would never say that.
Anyway, my point is maybe your hubby is happy with you the way you are and may be insecure himself and is afraid that if you change then you'll expect him to and maybe he's just not ready to. Just keep doing it for you. Maybe talk to him and tell him you would like for him to eat better/be more active/whatever to be a good example for your boys but that it's his choice and you'll love him no matter what. But that you have made the choice to do these things and would appreciate him supporting you in your choices and not sabotaging your efforts (if he's doing that). Ask him if he could only eat junk food, etc. when he's out or not around you. Ask if you can pick the places you eat out so that you can make healthy choices or give him a list of acceptable places to eat. Help him help you.
You are doing great and you are doing this for you and your boys and your future. Stay strong. It is hard and some days are worse than others. If you need anything your MFP friends are here for you!0 -
I am right there with you! I tried to tell my hubby that we have both gained 40 pounds in 3 years, but his response was that he was trying to gain weight, and has no interest in losing those 40 pounds. Anytime I try to talk to him about my diet and excercising, he tells me I look fine and he doesn't think I need to put that much effort into it. That really bums me out. I didn't really mind his lack of interest, but to not support me is depressing. He loves to send me to the store to buy him snacks. I am grateful to the wonderful people on MFP who have helped me with motivation and inspiration! You can do this!!
Haha...if he's sending you out for his snacks you should bring back healthy ones for him! :laugh:0 -
It is hard. The thing is that we're always going to have people around us who dont take care of themselves the way we do. Donut eaters, pizza partiers, snackers, drinkers, smokers... But, just bcz someone else is eating donuts and smoking cigs doesnt mean we want to. I would rather drink barf than smoke a stinky cig. Maybe I'll start to feel that way about donuts! Lol
Can't really get everyone on board with what we're doing. Sometimes I ask my husband if he wants to join me in a smoothie or a salad or whatever my thing is, and lots of times he says YES! It truly doesnt matter to me if he wants to eat lasagne while I have salad. I'm working too hard to ruin my day with a calorie bomb! Altho, I have asked him to hide potato chips from me bcz I cant resist those!0 -
Awww, thanks guys!!) Glad to have everyone here! 0
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We are always here for you!!! I have the same thing here. It's really hard seeing everyone else here heap their plates full of what ever they want, when I have measured portions on my plate. And then to see the teenagers in the kitchen shoveling junk food in their faces. Keep up the good work you are doing and whenever you need us we will be here for you.0
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Sorry you dont have support at home, I always think that its a good way to bond/spend some time together. We like to hike, bike ride with the kids, or even make up our own workouts, sometimes we are so goofy that it makes the workout time go by faster. Maybe you will be able to change his mind, if not for himself, for you and the family Good luck! 0
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