Open letter con't
SweetToothMelissa
Posts: 137 Member
I was looking for one too, and I think no one had started a new one yet, so I was going to start one, but I'll just go along with this one!
Dear BF,
It really upet me the other day that when you were "rating" celebrities on your Ask Men website, you rated Carrie Underwood a 7. I mean 7?? She's hot as hell, and I could never measure up to that, no matter how skinny I get. It just makes me feel like I am a 2! Even though, when I asked what you rated me, you said "you're mine" with a smile, it still made me mad!
Love, your slightly self conscious girlfriend
Dear my boss' boss,
STOP flirting with me! You are old enough to be my father and even though you laugh about it and it may seem like a joke to you, you're disgusting. Call me "baby" one more time and I'm reporting your *kitten*. You flirt with every female you come into contact with and you're on my last nerve.
Sincerely, annoyed!
Dear hurried driver today,
The speed limit is 30, and you were all up on my *kitten* when I was going 35, and it was freezing rain. You almost tapped me, and believe me people I am not a slow driver!!
Yours truly, a good driver
Hmm let's see anyone else? Oh yea 2 more
Dear person who shall not be named:
Thank you for farting very loudly, in front of me today as I was walking behind you :noway: . Greatly appreciated! I may not have an appetite for breakfast. Oh who am I kidding...I'm starving like always! LOL
- sincerely, digusted every morning when you do this
and lastly, Dear bathroom scale:
Please read my correct weight....which is not in the 160's anymore(at least in my mind). I have done all the right things and you refuse to budge. TOM isn't here, and my sodium intake is fine. What gives?
Love me...maybe a little love will get it to change??
*END RANT* :drinker: :flowerforyou: :explode:
Dear BF,
It really upet me the other day that when you were "rating" celebrities on your Ask Men website, you rated Carrie Underwood a 7. I mean 7?? She's hot as hell, and I could never measure up to that, no matter how skinny I get. It just makes me feel like I am a 2! Even though, when I asked what you rated me, you said "you're mine" with a smile, it still made me mad!
Love, your slightly self conscious girlfriend
Dear my boss' boss,
STOP flirting with me! You are old enough to be my father and even though you laugh about it and it may seem like a joke to you, you're disgusting. Call me "baby" one more time and I'm reporting your *kitten*. You flirt with every female you come into contact with and you're on my last nerve.
Sincerely, annoyed!
Dear hurried driver today,
The speed limit is 30, and you were all up on my *kitten* when I was going 35, and it was freezing rain. You almost tapped me, and believe me people I am not a slow driver!!
Yours truly, a good driver
Hmm let's see anyone else? Oh yea 2 more
Dear person who shall not be named:
Thank you for farting very loudly, in front of me today as I was walking behind you :noway: . Greatly appreciated! I may not have an appetite for breakfast. Oh who am I kidding...I'm starving like always! LOL
- sincerely, digusted every morning when you do this
and lastly, Dear bathroom scale:
Please read my correct weight....which is not in the 160's anymore(at least in my mind). I have done all the right things and you refuse to budge. TOM isn't here, and my sodium intake is fine. What gives?
Love me...maybe a little love will get it to change??
*END RANT* :drinker: :flowerforyou: :explode:
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Replies
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So are we suppose to write a rant letter?
Dear Sweety,
I really hate how you are just as fat as me and you make fun of all the fat people around us. It really hurts my feelings because I'm one of those people. You say I'm not talking about you, but you are. Just because you love me doesn't mean its not geared toward me. I really wish you'd quit doing that and then telling me I'm too sensitive. If you don't like fat people then why are you fat as well?
Love your Boo!0 -
I wondered where these letters went... thanks for starting..0
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Oh Oh I lOVE open letters! I used to write them all the time in high school when a friend or a teacher would upset me, then I'd put them in a box and be fine. it's a good way to relieve some anger/stress without really causing any problems!
Here's mine for the day, it might get bigger later. I might need to start my box again..hmm..
Dear Water,
Honestly, why do you have to taste so bad? I enjoy you after a great workout when you're nice and cold, but it's hard for me to get my amount in each day when you just don't taste good. I would normally just add in a flavor to make it better, but some of those things are expensive. I'd rather just pour you into my pretty pink bottle and drink you. I think you need to work on your flavor...yeah.
Sincerely, Disgusted by you
Dear my boss,
why do you insist that I don't work throughout the week. Do you honestly think that two days on my paycheck is going to pay my bills? Well, no it won't! It's really not that hard to let me come in. I don't care if I have to shread your paperwork all day, as long as I can get paid for it!
Thanks!0 -
Dear Annoying Co-Worker,
The last time i checked, you were my equal and not my Manager. I would appreciate it if you would realize this and stop irritating the *kitten* out of me everyday. If you could learn to be nicer I wouldn't keep daydreaming about hitting you with my car in the parking lot.
Thanks,
Your Co-Worker and not your employee
P.S. I don't think it is a good idea to piss off a person with anger management issues!
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omg this is awesome!
Dear Lady with the "baby on board" in your window: please don't drive 50mph in a FLASHING SCHOOL ZONE. you have a BABY for God's sake! What is WRONG with you???? You want people to be careful of your kid but you feel like you should be over to mow down other peoples kids??
Dear Friend we haven't seen in a while & hubby: we have plans or we don't. I am not going to kill myself trying to find a babysitter for a maybe I will let you know....ish! And dear husband....you should know better! And NO you are not going to sneak out with him last min bc this is all "accidentally" planned. I am not that girl. Sorry! You got boy time Sunday. When do I get ME time! And New Flash Taking the baby with you to the store so I can stay home and clean is not ME time!!!!! SERIOUSLY????????????
Dear person not to be named: if you tell everyone to *bleep off* bc you can do it all on ur own and ur all grown up then stop acting all damaged and shocked that no one is helping you! FOR REAL! you can not disrespect people and then expect them to hand you a bunch of money they DON'T HAVE. oh and we aren't stupid, we know you are trying to total the car so you can get the $ for it and go around us not letting you sell it. yeah we were not born yest.
Dear God: I would like a friend. A friend that is on MY side, one that doesn't stab me in the back or rip out my heart. Someone I can trust and talk to without fear of them repeating it or judging me. Oh and someone who has time to talk to me.
Thanks.0 -
! Even though, when I asked what you rated me, you said "you're mine" with a smile, it still made me mad!
That makes you a 100! He chose you, he loves you, that makes him sweet as hell :flowerforyou:0 -
Dear Ma & Dad:
I miss you very much and wish you were here to see how I have changed my life. Thank you for never making me feel bad no matter what I weighed. Thank you for giving me an awesome childhood and family. And thank you for my sister who is Mom, best friend, sister, and a cool chick all rolled into one. I wish I could be as close with the other sister but I'll keep trying cause you all loved us - even when we broke windows, cut down the rose bush, or fought like cats & dogs.
Dear "Middle Sister":
I don't know why my getting healthy and improving my life has pissed you off so much. I know I moved 3 hours away to be with the man I love and that means I can't just jump in the car whenever you need me. But I'm here for you anyway - if you could just see that. Stop with the attitude and remember how close we once were. That said - I will continue to reach out and try to be a good sister to you.0 -
Dear Gyno,
Don't take this personally, but you're the last person I ever want to see again. I hate the fact that every year I am at your mercy for 5 minutes. I thought that if you get 3 good paps in a row you get 3 years home free...but you insist on doing them every year! Why? What's wrong with you? Do you enjoy torchering me? It's not like you have an awesome poster hanging on the ceiling that I can focus on...what happened to the picture of the moon you carelessly ripped out of a magazine? I liked that one, now I have a bunch of animals smoking and the headline says "you look stupid when you do it too"... that does not take my mind off the fact that you're "down there"...
Dear Fiance and Son
I am so sorry for what I'm about to put you two through. I got my birth control changed, and Lord knows what my PMS is going to be like. You have 3 weeks reprive right now so love me as much as you can, you may need to dip into your resources when I'm losing my mind. Lets hope these pills aren't the same as the last 4 I've tried.
Dear Scale
SERIOUSLY!!!! FREAKIN' SERIOUSLY!!!! You better be measuring my water weight because if I weigh the same that you say, I'm going to go bat *kitten* crazy on your stupid @ss...I have been doing this for 5 months now, I know I fall off the wagon, I've been known to binge on saturday nights...but for the love of freakin' god can you throw me a bone??? Just work with me here, I work out at least 4 days a week, I eat healthy at least 6 days a week, and what do I have to show for it? SQUAT! NOT A DAMN THING! This had all better change by Monday or I'm smashing you to tiny little bits and setting you on fire!
Sincerely,
Violated, apologetic and peeved0 -
This Open letter is wonderful.
Dear last year math Teacher of my teenaged son,
I moved my son from your school because of YOU. You could not control your class so you took your frustrations out on him. Yes he is a class clown, and can be downright aggravating at times (ok most times) but he is a good boy, You know that he is. He was not a threat to you so you chose him to harass because you are afraid of the real thugs in your classroom. The ones who called you out of your name and made lewd remarks about you to your face. My son answered yes ma'am, and no ma'am and you could not handle that, you told him not to be so polite (your exact words). Well sister, you are on your own this year. By the way, he is doing great at his new school and they absolutely adore him there.0 -
Dear Annoying Co-Worker,
The last time i checked, you were my equal and not my Manager. I would appreciate it if you would realize this and stop irritating the *kitten* out of me everyday. If you could learn to be nicer I wouldn't keep daydreaming about hitting you with my car in the parking lot.
Thanks,
Your Co-Worker and not your employee
P.S. I don't think it is a good idea to piss off a person with anger management issues!
LOL...tooo funny!0 -
! Even though, when I asked what you rated me, you said "you're mine" with a smile, it still made me mad!
That makes you a 100! He chose you, he loves you, that makes him sweet as hell :flowerforyou:
LOL...I suppose you're right :bigsmile:0 -
Dear Doctor,
I think it's great that you seem to want what's best for me and my health but trying to force me to sign up for an obesity class when I'm terrified/paranoid of other people is really starting to piss me off. If you would care about my issues about anxiety and help me then I might go join the herd!
Your very mad patient!0 -
Dear Manager,
Could you make it to work ON TIME one day out of the year? preferably today, when I have to transport someone to a funeral. I do not want to look like a dumbass coming in late to a funeral when YOU are the one who can't get out of bed. I sent you 2 messages today saying that you need to be here by 9am at the latest and it is 8:59. You make me so mad that I want to spit in your eye. This is not even for me, but also the person I'm transporting. Be considerate of other's time for once. You have made me late on several different occasions, and when I give you the stink eye because you make me late, don't giggle like it's funny.
Signed-
Punctual0 -
Dear Pizza,
I adore your smooth melted cheese topped with spicy pepperoni washed down with a pepsi, but please stay out of my thoughts when I have 1400 calories left over from the day. You've become very inexpensive and oh so tempting but you make me sick to my stomach....No really....my tummy can't handle all of you anymore because I've found other lovers in my life that are better for me.
Your cooperation is kindly appreciated!0 -
dear my so-called friend,
Really? You had to start some EXTREMELY lame and childish arguement with one of my friend, whom you DONT know, over me losing weight. Just because we want to get healthy and like how we look doesn't mean you have to bash us. Perhaps you are jealous? There was no need to start some arguement that had no relevancy at all. She did not start it, you did and you know it. Oh and keep your wife out of it too, it's not her arguement.
Sincerely,
PO'ed friend.
Dear snow,
GO AWAY! You are ruining everything! You aren't even the fun snow, you're the nasty wet icky snow that gets all over everything and makes it really hard to go anywhere! I need you to melt and tell the sun to come out. K, thanks!
-warmth lover!
Dear Boyfriend,
You know I love you! With everything I've got! How about we stop going out to eat at Fast food places. You complain that you need to lose weight, but you aren't doing anything. Come with me to work out, or better yet, let's both get a card to the community center. You and I both know that if we start working out together you will lose a ton quicker than me. Other than that, I love you! Whether you are 300 or 200 lbs.
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Dear Mother Nature,
I know I b!tch about you a lot. I know you are very very p!ssed at us right now for destroying everything you are with our gas guzzling SUV's and flaring at the refineries, but why must you be so horrid? First you dump 52 centimetres of snow on us, drop the temperature to -40 celcius, and let us sit in the deep freeze for about a week. Then you decide that isn't enough! Why not jack the temperature up to +8 and make it rain, in one day. So now the roads are sheer ice. I mean you can't even touch your breaks without hearing your breaks lock, that's scary. Can you please start taking your meds, I would really like to drive to work one day without praying to get there safely.
Thank-you,
Your humble servant.0 -
Dear self,
GET OUT OF THE FUNK YOU'RE IN. YOU'RE SCARING PEOPLE!!!0 -
Dear librarian-
I know I walked into the library to pick up my book on hold right after a work-out with a red face and sweaty hair. I am busy and wanted to get my errands done when I was able which was right after my work-out. I don't appreciate your dirty looks and snotty attitude. I deserve to be treated nicely. I am tired of you and some of the other ladies there being so uppity and pretentious. I like to read but I am thinking of buying a kindle just so I don't have to deal with the attitudes. Do you need to have a crappy attitude to work at that library?
Signed,
Tired of the tude0 -
Dear Spring,
Hurry up already!
Love, me0 -
Dear Admins who order lunch for Meetings,
Some of us don't want to eat greasy, calorie ridden, processed junk for 3 days worth of meetings. Could you MAYBE think about adding a salad to your lunch? I wouldn't even mind the fatty dressing as long as I could eat something green.
Please ask if people want a change or a choice next time.
Regards,
The girl who made her own lunch instead0 -
Dear Dumb Guys Who Keep Overlooking Me,
When are some of you going to realize that I'M AWESOME and scoop me up? I might not look like a supermodel, but I bet I'd treat you a hell of a lot better than one would! I mean, I really am awesome. :laugh: I'm funny, smart, cute, nice, loyal, cute, funny, low maintenance, independent, and did I mention funny and cute? :laugh:
Get with the program here, guys! Here I am, come and get me! :drinker:
Signed,
Miss Awesome0 -
Dear Dumb Guys Who Keep Overlooking Me,
When are some of you going to realize that I'M AWESOME and scoop me up? I might not look like a supermodel, but I bet I'd treat you a hell of a lot better than one would! I mean, I really am awesome. :laugh: I'm funny, smart, cute, nice, loyal, cute, funny, low maintenance, independent, and did I mention funny and cute? :laugh:
Get with the program here, guys! Here I am, come and get me! :drinker:
Signed,
Miss Awesome
oh honey, you sound just like me...I kept getting dumped because I was to independent, and I wasn`t needy enough. The thing is, look for a guy that`s already had the psycho girlfriend, and is now looking for someone a lot less dramatic lol...I found one, so I know they`re out there...do you know the song "can't make a hoe a housewife" by snoop dog? that's my mantra...you can be a hoe, just present yourself as a housewife lol Once guys realize that crazy, fun and beautiful isn't all it's cracked up to be, they'll be pounding your door down...or get proactive like I did and date off the internet lol good luck!0 -
Dear Dumb Guys Who Keep Overlooking Me,
When are some of you going to realize that I'M AWESOME and scoop me up? I might not look like a supermodel, but I bet I'd treat you a hell of a lot better than one would! I mean, I really am awesome. :laugh: I'm funny, smart, cute, nice, loyal, cute, funny, low maintenance, independent, and did I mention funny and cute? :laugh:
Get with the program here, guys! Here I am, come and get me! :drinker:
Signed,
Miss Awesome
oh honey, you sound just like me...I kept getting dumped because I was to independent, and I wasn`t needy enough. The thing is, look for a guy that`s already had the psycho girlfriend, and is now looking for someone a lot less dramatic lol...I found one, so I know they`re out there...do you know the song "can't make a hoe a housewife" by snoop dog? that's my mantra...you can be a hoe, just present yourself as a housewife lol Once guys realize that crazy, fun and beautiful isn't all it's cracked up to be, they'll be pounding your door down...or get proactive like I did and date off the internet lol good luck!
Not for lack of trying...I've done just about everything, from going up to guys in public (though I admit I could do that a bit more), asking friends to fix me up, joined dating sites...
And I am crazy (in a good way) fun and beautiful...yet I'm still single. Someday my prince will come...0 -
Dear Boss,
I'm sick and tired of you telling clients or FRIENDS that YOU'LL to them this favor that you then pass on to me to accomplish so you can swoop in and be the hero. Especially when it involves locating a binder that was made before I worked here that you're not even sure we have a copy of, scanning the entire binder into a PDF and burning it to a CD you'll give to your friend. Quit writing checks you can't yourself cash!
kthanks.0 -
Not for lack of trying...I've done just about everything, from going up to guys in public (though I admit I could do that a bit more), asking friends to fix me up, joined dating sites...
And I am crazy (in a good way) fun and beautiful...yet I'm still single. Someday my prince will come...
Join a kickball league (www.waka.com) in your area. I met my husband there and I could probably rattle off a dozen other couples who have been married from meeting at kickball.0 -
dear city:
please plow the streets. we live in the midwest and it does snow here, so if i could not have to blaze a trail to work everytime it snows i'd appreciate it. also, clear the sidewalks off so kids don't have to walk in the roads.
sincerely,
one seriously upset driver
dear husband:
i asked you to do THREE things for me yesterday: help me make the bed, do the dishes, and get me some razor cartridges so i could shave my legs. you're batting 0/3. AFTER i let you use my car to go to the store so you wouldn't get cold digging yours out.
no love,
your cranky wife0 -
Not for lack of trying...I've done just about everything, from going up to guys in public (though I admit I could do that a bit more), asking friends to fix me up, joined dating sites...
And I am crazy (in a good way) fun and beautiful...yet I'm still single. Someday my prince will come...
Join a kickball league (www.waka.com) in your area. I met my husband there and I could probably rattle off a dozen other couples who have been married from meeting at kickball.
That sounds fun! Thanks!0 -
Dear Husband:
Flirt back with me. I tell you you're hot ..every single day in many various ways, I know you are still attracted to me despite my flaws so quit yawning. I know you wake before the sun rises and our three year old daughter is an adorable soul drainer and our 10 year old son idolizes you and tries to pack in a glorious father and son moment fifteen times in one evening BUT PLEASE BEFORE I'M FIFTY FLIRT WITH ME AGAIN!
Dear Neighbor:
Your heart is in the right place but just b/c it's really cold (36 degrees) doesn't mean our sons can't ride their bicycles to school. Quit pansying up our kids and just put a damned hat and gloves on your son and let him grow some balls already ok? It isn't sleet, it isn't snow, it isn't even raining and honestly, a double layer will prevent all mental anguish of riding a bicycle for a few blocks.
Dear In Laws:
Get your head out of your *kitten* and say hello to your only three grandchildren that live fifteen minutes away from you. They have other grandparents that visit with them and do things with them: you two are looking like massive losers and they already realize it. The day will soon come when they don't even care anymore and you'll be permanently stuck in the 'family that sucks' category for our kids so WAKE up and smell the coffee.0 -
Dear scooby (my dog)
Its winter please stop shedding. Didnt you get the memo?0 -
Not for lack of trying...I've done just about everything, from going up to guys in public (though I admit I could do that a bit more), asking friends to fix me up, joined dating sites...
And I am crazy (in a good way) fun and beautiful...yet I'm still single. Someday my prince will come...
Join a kickball league (www.waka.com) in your area. I met my husband there and I could probably rattle off a dozen other couples who have been married from meeting at kickball.
Just an FYI- the website is http://www.kickball.com/, waka.com takes me to a news website. :laugh:0
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