is "fat" derogatory?

2

Replies

  • sculli123
    sculli123 Posts: 1,221 Member
    On this site, fat is a macro, just like carbs and protein.
  • ValGogo
    ValGogo Posts: 2,168 Member


    There's no need to worry though, my boy has autism. He'll tell you if you're fat.:wink:

    Hahaha, that was brilliant!
  • celtic_thistle
    celtic_thistle Posts: 18 Member
    No. It's realistic. People are fat. It is a description.
  • carrieliz81
    carrieliz81 Posts: 489 Member
    I just used the word "fat" in a post earlier today to refer to the squishy rolls that are on full display when I work out in m'spandex and tight shirts!
  • sherambler
    sherambler Posts: 303 Member
    I don't consider "fat" derogatory...in most cases. I call myself fat all the time. I also call my myself overweight, obese, etc. Some time's it's a postive, jokey "yeah, I'm fat" and other times it's a negative like "today I feel fat, not obese". I think it's a matter of context and whether or not you're using it against someone else like,"oh, man, you're really fat." or...."your boyfriend sounds fat". I also think people get bent out of shape when someone who would generally be considered not obese or not even really overweight calls themselves fat. But it's a matter of self-perception. When I was a just a little overweight, I saw myself as fat.

    I think the reason why so many people refrain from using the word "fat" is most likely because they were called that most of their lives and have negative associations with it, so they use different words to create positive associations with a new chapter in their lives.

    I would hope most people would be able to tell when someone is clearly using it to be jerk or a bully and not.
  • jharlowlives
    jharlowlives Posts: 41 Member
    Na, it's just a descriptive word. I'm fat. If you are actually fat and consider it derogatory, you need to evaluate your self worth.
  • amcook4
    amcook4 Posts: 561 Member
    Depends a lot on the context. Me calling my too big for me clothes my fat clothes is a lot different than someone saying "Look at that fat fatty!"
  • drazani
    drazani Posts: 98 Member
    Being called fat doesnt offend me at all, i prefer to be called phat though
  • FemWeight
    FemWeight Posts: 96
    I think it all depends on the person. I personally know I'm FAT! I have more calories of "fat" in my body than muscle. And I plan to kick fats *kitten*!

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  • LadyHobbledehoy
    LadyHobbledehoy Posts: 91 Member
    I think those who find the word "fat" offensive or derogatory are those who are afraid to admit (or refuse to admit) that they are, indeed, fat. Dude, whether or not you want to believe it, you are fat. It's no secret to anyone around you.

    Most of the time, I use "overweight" and "obese" to describe the degree of fatness.
  • amysj303
    amysj303 Posts: 5,086 Member
    It has connotations:tongue:
  • lorib642
    lorib642 Posts: 1,942 Member
    Hi, I'm Lori and I'm fat :)
  • A_New_Creation
    A_New_Creation Posts: 180 Member
    Haha excellent response.
  • eric_sg61
    eric_sg61 Posts: 2,925 Member
    It is like calling someone old or bald or short etc
  • knitapeace
    knitapeace Posts: 1,013 Member
    I *have* fat but it's not what I *am*. I also have a liver, but that doesn't make me liver.
  • Michifan
    Michifan Posts: 95 Member
    Everything we say to another person is absorbed by the prism of that person. If you aren't trying to communicate effectively, what are you doing opening your mouth?

    It's like using the 'n' word. I'd never do it - I'm too old to pretend I'm hip and its pretty clear that a very very large number of people find the word offensive so its not a word I need to use. On the other hand, if two people that know one another want to use that word, and neither are offended by it - it's none of my business.

    Same for a whole host of other words. I don't think 'retarded' is a slur - to me its a description of someone that has retarded learning. However, I'm also aware that people with learning disabilities might find it offensive, so I'm pretty careful in the use of what I think is not a slur - but what someone else might consider a slur.

    Calling someone fat - ask yourself what is it you are trying to convey. Is fat the same as overweight? Obese is a technical term (and according to my BMI, I'm obese) - but I know some people think that's a horrible word.

    Know your listener and if you give a darn about how someone else responds to you, there is no victory in convincing someone that a word you used shouldn't be offensive to them.
  • zyg65
    zyg65 Posts: 3 Member
    Well, you can look at it from two different angles.

    I don't think it SHOULD be considered offensive. To be offended by being called 'fat' is (in my mind) to admit you don't believe it's something temporary or subject to change. If that were true, none of us would be here - everyone here is doing something about it, so they have nothing to be ashamed of or offended by.

    But, in the real world people are offended by it. So rather than note that my friend is "getting a little fat" and go through the whole process above, it's 'kinder' not to mention it (although, rationally, it'd actually be nicer to bring it to their attention than to obviously dance around it).

    I think the take away is people are weird and self-obsessive. They are mostly too worried about themselves to consider that a) they might hurt someone else by calling them fat, or that b) they really shouldn't care that someone called them fat.
  • JohnBuscus
    JohnBuscus Posts: 9 Member
    Being offended is a sign you need to be offended some more.
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    If you are actually fat and consider it derogatory, you need to evaluate your self worth.
    Hm...this describes me to a T. :frown:
    (Runs off to start research on evaluating and improving self-worth/self esteem)
  • Missjulesdid
    Missjulesdid Posts: 1,444 Member
    I use the terms fat or obese though I prefer fat. It's just a physical descriptor like tall, short, skinny, fair, dark, etc. I HATE it when people will say things like "oh don't say that about yourself, you're not fat" UH YES I AM and it is not a negative thing to say so. Now if someone is using "fat" as an insult that's a different story, but on its own there is nothing wrong with the term FAT.
  • lollipoprincess
    lollipoprincess Posts: 117 Member
    I'd rather be called fat it makes me sad and more motivated lol. Actually being called "big boned" ???? makes me the angriest.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
    Being offended is a sign you need to be offended some more.

    No, it's not. There isn't a "feeling offended" immunity you build up.

    I don't understand why people aren't more concerned with being kind. I try to avoid offending people whenever I can, because WHY NOT? Is there some weird sense of pride one gets when being offensive? I genuinely don't get it. You're rendering another person's feelings invalid when you tell them that getting offended is dumb, weak, silly, etc, which is a ****ty thing to do.
  • afranklin85
    afranklin85 Posts: 13 Member
    I believe it comes down to your intent. If you're using it to be offensive then it'll be taken that way. If you're offering advice and you call someone fat then I would imagine they'll take the positive tone of the sentence and not care that the word "fat" was thrown in there.

    Obviously this is a unique scenario to a forum based on weight loss. If you start referring to people as fat on a star trek or gossip forum you will probably always offend.
  • LadyHobbledehoy
    LadyHobbledehoy Posts: 91 Member
    Being offended is a sign you need to be offended some more.

    No, it's not. There isn't a "feeling offended" immunity you build up.

    I don't understand why people aren't more concerned with being kind. I try to avoid offending people whenever I can, because WHY NOT? Is there some weird sense of pride one gets when being offensive? I genuinely don't get it. You're rendering another person's feelings invalid when you tell them that getting offended is dumb, weak, silly, etc, which is a ****ty thing to do.

    If we walked around with the mindset that we shouldn't say anything that could ever possibly offend anyone, it would be a pretty silent world. Good luck with that.
  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
    Being offended is a sign you need to be offended some more.

    No, it's not. There isn't a "feeling offended" immunity you build up.

    I don't understand why people aren't more concerned with being kind. I try to avoid offending people whenever I can, because WHY NOT? Is there some weird sense of pride one gets when being offensive? I genuinely don't get it. You're rendering another person's feelings invalid when you tell them that getting offended is dumb, weak, silly, etc, which is a ****ty thing to do.

    If we walked around with the mindset that we shouldn't say anything that could ever possibly offend anyone, it would be a pretty silent world. Good luck with that.

    My world isn't silent at all, thanks.

    It's not hard to avoid words that you already know upset people. There are words out there you KNOW are offensive to many people - it's common knowledge (the n word, the c word, the r word, etc). My suggestion is simply to avoid using said words. No where did I say (or imply) that anyone "shouldn't say anything that could ever possibly offend anyone". Those are your words, not mine. If I wanted you to put words in my mouth, I would have bent over for you.
  • independant2406
    independant2406 Posts: 447 Member
    I think those who find the word "fat" offensive or derogatory are those who are afraid to admit (or refuse to admit) that they are, indeed, fat. Dude, whether or not you want to believe it, you are fat. It's no secret to anyone around you.

    Most of the time, I use "overweight" and "obese" to describe the degree of fatness.


    An ugly person is ugly and everyone knows they are but its not nice to call them ugly to their face - would you do this without question just because the word is a fitting description?

    There are some derogatory words for a person's race... everyone knows they are that race - but its not nice to use those words - would you do this without question because its a word that describes them?

    A fat person may be fat but its not nice to call them fat - why is this more acceptable to say this to their face than the words above?

    I call myself fat all the time...because I am. I've been fat since I was 9 years old. I use the word "fat" to describe myself when I'm unhappy with myself mostly (because it hurts and I'm frustrated and angry at myself after years of trying to reverse it). However, if another person (particularly someone who is not overweight) called me fat to my face I'd probably feel even worse about myself than I already do. If my husband or someone who's opinion I valued called me fat I'd feel suicidal.

    There is a time and a place to use this word. (As someone said earlier its all about context). People have feelings. So do you. Why make another person feel bad? Fat people know they are fat... trust me they do. Would you use this word just to make yourself feel better? Because you think it'll help them in some way? What good does it do for anyone exactly?

    “Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle”
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    Fat is a description.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
    I *have* fat but it's not what I *am*. I also have a liver, but that doesn't make me liver.

    This made me laugh because when we were kids, my sister used to call me Liver just to get under my skin. In return, I called her Gizzard.
  • p_emmel5
    p_emmel5 Posts: 39 Member
    Personal opinion: Its all in the context in which its being used. If it isn't something I would say, in the same context, to somebody's face then I am probably using using it in a derogratory way.

    Looking at some of the replies, it I were to call several of the authors complete morons and dumb *kitten* I wouldn't offend ? Because its a description. Good to know. If anybody thinks this is directed at them, please don't be offended because "complete morons" or "dumb *kitten*" are descriptions not derogatory :wink:
  • mojohowitz
    mojohowitz Posts: 900 Member
    I can call myself fat. You may not. Don't ask why. It's just the way it is.

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