How do you cope with the self-loathing?

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  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
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    You have to keep telling yourself the truth, no matter what you feel/think. I'm sure if you take a step back, you can, on some level, acknowledge that you are NOT a worthless pile of garbage. Start there. Tell yourself that, over and over and over. Say it out loud. If you notice that you did something right, congratulate yourself. Tell yourself that you are proud of yourself. Tell yourself that you did a good job.

    Self-loathing is born of what you tell yourself about yourself. So, make a choice to tell yourself something different. Is it easier to keep thinking/saying the same things? Sure. Is it hard work to tell/make yourself think something different? Yep. But. If you keep doing it, it gets easier over time.
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
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    Basic cognitive behavioral therapy question:

    Am I viewing this problem realistically, or have I been overreacting? Is
    there another way of viewing this?
    What should I do?
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
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    I kicked self loathing to the curb like this:

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle/view/immodesty-696648

    I also write gratitude lists and watch you tube videos about cleaning. I used to dislike myself the most when I did housework, but I'm getting much better.
  • George_Baileys_Ghost
    George_Baileys_Ghost Posts: 1,524 Member
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    Until I can afford therapy, I grit my teeth and ignore it. It's brought me through this far. Not a path I'd recommend for just anybody though.
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
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    Thank you so much everybody for your kind words and support - it means a lot. There are some really helpful suggestions here that I am definitely taking on board xx
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
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    I keep thinking of the song "The Greatest Love of All". Remember "Learning to love yourself, is the greatest love of all".
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
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    I've been giving this a bit more thought. I definitely agree with the speaking to oneself as one would address others. I blogged about perfectionism and this point came up in that context, but do read it anyway if you like (if you're not decidedly perfectionist):
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/AglaeaC/view/expecting-perfection-684614

    I think it would be helpful for you to ponder in greater detail when you get the feelings, whether there is a certain pattern to them or not. Do places, people, time of day/week/month/year, lack of sleep, levels of nutrition and movement, sex, etc. act as triggers? Or is it just random?

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