Way OT, but I need some input....

Here's what I'll say.

95% is not 100%. I had ideas when I was in my early twenties that have not stuck. One of those choices was to not have children, and in my late thirties, I'm still at peace with that. That being said, there are lots of other things I was "sure" of in my early twenties that I can't believe I ever thought now. But about the kids, I wasn't "there with that" and I'm still not. Just not for me.

What she said. I was 100% at 23; I'm 100% sure now that I don't want them. That doesn't mean in 4 years, I won't change my mind. However, if it will help the cyst not return, I would go ahead and get the tubal sterilization. You can always adopt.

At 23, I'd wait.
Not that your decision isn't valid. That is not the case AT ALL.
But many decisions we make are very valid for the time period but we may not feel the same down the road. A few years can pass and seems like eons. You may never want kids, which is a great life choice, but knowing you still have the option to twenty years down the road, if you wanted to.... I dunno. I'm only 27 myself, and still so young (although I feel so old).

I'd use an IUD or even a tubal (which can be reversed).

BTW, what does 'tubal sterilization' entail??? Will THAT screw with your hormones like menopause would? Will they remove the ovaries?

I would also have to say that an IUD is the way to go. There is a non-hormonal version available called "Paragard" and then there is a version that uses a small amount of hormones to control fertility called "Mirena". Both are an awesome choice and are long-term! I have a Mirena and I love it. They're just as effective or even slightly more effective than getting your "tubes tied". Plus, they are completely, 100% reversible.

I was a 26 year old newlywed when I was diagnosed with uterine cancer so my imput on this might be a wee bit skewed :huh: Several things come to mind for me.......there are examples of men like my brother who had a vastectomy after their second child was born, only to have it reversed 3 years later and went on to have five more children (still think they turbo-charged him when they undid it). Then there's examples of women who had a tubal ligation, only to have a little surprise pop up a couple of years down the road (personally know someone that happened to). An option that you might also want to consider is ~ if you decide later that you do indeed want children, then adoption is something to consider.

You should talk to your doctor about the reversal if you were to get a tubal ligation. When I had mine done my doctor used what they call Hulka Clips. Which are totally reversable if I had made the decision to have them undone if I wanted to have another baby.

here is a link for it.

http://www.tubal-reversal.net/tubal_ligation-tubal_ring-tubal_clip.htm


Good luck on the cyst removal. :flowerforyou:

I've been on just about every form of BC there is from the diaphram to IUD.

I cannot handle BC pills - the hormones throw my body SO out of wack!

The copper paraguard IUD made me bleed SO heavily for 3 weeks of of the month and I cramped up - no good.

I LOVED Mirena IUD - it made my periods lighter, and I never knew it was there except for some very light cramping around TOM. The hormones are localized to your uterus, so my body was fine (NOT like on BC pills, where it is systematic). I had it for several years, removed it and conceived DS #3 within 7 months and now hubby has been tied!

I'm so glad to be done with BC options. I agree with the other posters - I would wait a few more years before getting your tubes tied. But I have a friend whose daughter had her tubes tied at 18, and she never regretted it. You'll know what you need to do when the time comes to it. Hugs :flowerforyou:

Hey y'all. :flowerforyou:

As some of you may already know, I have been suffering from an ovarian cyst for awhile now. It's about the size of my actual ovary. So, after many appointments, the doctor is finally going to go in and remove the dang thing.

Here's the part I would like some input on: My husband and I are 95% positive that we do not want children. I have made sure that I am not just hopping on the bandwagon with him by playing with babies and children and hanging out with mothers and mothers to be. I know that it is something I do not feel would fit into my life. This being the case, I have requested tubal sterilization. (Birth control hormones drive me CRAZY. I guess I have enough hormones!! )

What I am wondering, are there any people out there that have decided to not have children at a younge age and what regrets do you have, if any?

(NOTE TO THE FAB MOMS AND POPS! I respect you and your decision to have children :flowerforyou: In no way am I trying to tork off the great parents here. Just trying to solidify my own decision and preparing for any future issues.)

Thanks so much!
M

May I ask how old you are? Keep in mind that a lot of doctors will not actually do that procedure if you are under 30 for the reason that people change their minds. The would definatley do it if t were hazardous to your health not to but I have always been told that if you are under 30 they won't do it. I have also heard that some are more likely to do it under the age of 30 if you already have kids. Just something to think about in case you get your hopes up and they say no.

My brother who is only a year younger than me married a woman a couple of years ago. She got pregnant when she was 18 and had her tubes tied afterwards and now that she is married to my brother she would like to have another one. That was over 12 years ago taht she had that done. Now they have to save up to have them implanted in her. Like some of the other ones said before I would wait because you are still young and you very well could change your mind but if you really want to have it I had a different procedure done and absolutly loved it. I am 32 and have 3 kids. My oldest is 10 and my youngest is 13 mths. My doctor told me about ESSURE. IT can be done in the doctors office and it only took about 15 minutes to actually have it done. They inserted these little springs inside my tubes and then tissue grows around it. 3 mths after having it done I had a special xray done to make sure my tubes were blocked and they are. It was so much cheaper than having surgery. No hospital stay, no going under the knife, no being put to sleep. The only thing I had was a valium and my mother in law drove me home. Very simple procedure and I would recommend it if that is something you really want.

Connie

I'm hesitated to weigh in on this one but it appears that all but one person who replied to you made the decision to have children or been happily surprised. I suspect that those who were unhappily surprised would never really step forward. I only met one women in my life who admitted that she should not have had children. I've met dozens upon dozens who should not have had children but did.

I'm 46 and I don't have children. That was a choice I made years ago. I've always enjoyed being around children but never wanted my own. I don't regret my decision. Now, I do have days. My sister married and had children very young so our lives have been very different. There are days (maybe a couple a year) when she envies my life I envy hers. Nothing says that you'll never think about it and wonder "what if". That's just natural. But, even when I have those days, I'm comfortable that I made the right decision.

Raising a child is the hardest and most selfless thing that you can do. I greatly admire the men and women who do it well and do it because they love it. I admire those who do it well, even when it doesn't make them happy but they recognize the responsibility. I don't recommend the latter. Raising a child should be joyous not a burden. I also have a lot of respect for those who decide not to have children. I don't have respect for those who have children and raise them irresponsibly or don't raise them at all. It's criminal, in my opinion.

I think there are too many people in our society who have children when they don't really want them. I think they convince themselves that they are supposed to want them and that's what "people do."

With that said.....the fact that you are asking our opinion indicates that you aren't really sure right now. Think it through before making a final decision and really examine what is driving your decision. In addition to examing how you feel about raising children, think , if you should change your mind, does that child needs to come from your own body. There are options like adoption or fostering. You need to understand if the other options are viable for you. That could very heavily influence your decision as well.