WHY WAIT UNTIL I LOSE WEIGHT TO LOVE MYSELF!!!!

BettJo64
BettJo64 Posts: 760 Member
in Motivation and Support
I HATE the weight, but I LOVE myself :heart: I'm a big girl! yes, I am, indeed. I have been for my whole life. I've never ever known a moment of adulthood being under 200lbs. I am 50yrs old and my highest weight was 430lbs when I was 30. I joined MFP in July at 369lbs and today I'm 317lbs. I'm very proud of my 52lbs loss so far and I continue to strive to lose more every day. But my message here is that I've never had a moment where I didn't love myself.:heart: Not a conceited love. But a true...I care about myself and I love many things about myself kind of love. :heart: I hurt when I hear so many stories on here of self-hatred and degredation. My pride in myself never waivered no matter what weight I held at the moment. I have always carried myself as a lady who cares about her looks and hygiene. I firmly believe this is a personal issue and not necessarily up to everyone to carry such extreme personal judgments on others simply because of weight. Weight in my opinion has nothing to do with showering, fixing your hair, wearing makeup, adding perfume, finding something flattering to wear for your body type and best features, putting on a sweet smile, and having a great attitude about yourself and another blessed day in this world. This confidence exudes through all those pounds!!! Somehow others forget size and see YOU and they like what they see! Loving the YOU that is in this skin right now is so highly important in your journey of change!! How on earth can you treat yourself right and find joy in life NOW if you don't really love ALL OF YOU??? By loving yourself today as you are, you will be able to fight this good fight from a positive place to better ensure your dream goals to come true. So please...stop waiting to be skinny to LOVE YOU :heart: :heart: :heart: you are beautiful today! you are precious and special today! you are sexy and confident today!!! :wink: :bigsmile: :heart:

Skinnier tomorrow is what I'm working to be,
But today I'm choosing to LOVE ALL OF ME.
I'll respect myself for it is my profound duty.
And I'll show the world all my confident beauty.
Smiles I'll carry will be genuine and true
Because I'll feel this joy through and through.
LOVING MYSELF will cause a FIRE to ignite
And I won't be stopped in this weight loss FIGHT!!!
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Replies

  • dogluvr_2014
    dogluvr_2014 Posts: 54 Member
    Great post!!! I do struggle with loving myself the way I am now. Don't get me wrong, I do like who I am and I know that I am a genuinely nice, kind and caring person and that part of me I love but I do struggle to find my worth when I see how I look. I think it's great that you have always loved yourself no matter your size and you will inspire me to find a way to see myself the same way. God Bless and thanks for sharing!!! :flowerforyou:
  • jojokmack
    jojokmack Posts: 117
    SUPER motivating! I love YOU TOO! :flowerforyou: :love: :flowerforyou: :love: :flowerforyou: :love:
  • DanIsACyclingFool
    DanIsACyclingFool Posts: 417 Member
    What a great message.

    :drinker: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • kellyskitties
    kellyskitties Posts: 475 Member
    I love your post.

    I've always struggled with the "self-conscious" part of being overweight - in that I wasn't very self-conscious about it but others acted as though either 1) they were or 2) I must be. I still have always put on a swimsuit and done what ever I was interested in doing. The weight has never been my "shield" from life. I do try to dress to camouflage my middle some - that would be my one self-conscious spot - but that just means I wear a looser top while I hike, swim, run etc. I never understood the "I'm to fat to wear a swimsuit" or "go running" or anything else. If I wait until I'm not I might wait my whole life. Ain't nobody got time for that.
  • JordanMK_
    JordanMK_ Posts: 54 Member
    Betty you're awesome from the in and outside! I love your kindness! I can only wish you good luck and hope you stay many more days logging with me!
  • traceywoody
    traceywoody Posts: 233 Member
    Yes!
  • ponycyndi
    ponycyndi Posts: 858 Member
    I spent way too many years beating myself up because I couldn't fit into the "skinny jeans". When I stopped doing that, and started loving myself, the weight came off without the mental struggle.
  • girlwithcurls2
    girlwithcurls2 Posts: 2,282 Member
    Good for you, girl! There are plenty of skinny people out there without the self love you have. You are worth it at 300+ the same as you will be at GW. And you'll be happier during the process! :flowerforyou:

    Thanks for the inspirational post. You deserve every bit of your confidence, happiness and love. I'll bet people love being around you IRL :heart:
  • jennie1801
    jennie1801 Posts: 12
    This was a great read...you are so inspirational. My whole life, I always thought if I wasn't thin, then I wasn't worthy of dressing nice, wearing make-up or buying new clothes. Even now, I feel I can't date or love myself until I loose the weight. Growing up, my family made comments about my weight. Even as I grew older, the comments continued. For instance, I met someone and my mom's first comment at me was did he see my stomach. It broke my heart and it just added to my low self esteem. Sometimes I think, family/friends try to help but their comments do so much harm. Thank you for posting this message. I think it is so important for girls to know that we are someone no matter what.
  • wahelga
    wahelga Posts: 304 Member
    Very well said :flowerforyou:
  • Hearts_2015
    Hearts_2015 Posts: 12,032 Member
    :drinker: :heart:
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    I'm cool with that. :smile:
  • krmsotherhalf68
    krmsotherhalf68 Posts: 122 Member
    BettyJo, you're one amazing woman! This post touched my heart so. I'm thanking God to be able to consider you as my MFP friend. Your self-love is something that I am trying to attain. Like many others, I was made fun of and criticized because of the way I looked (and that included my family members!). Now I take it one step at a time. I know I'm a good person on the inside and I'm striving to stop the prerecorded negative messages about my self-worth that keep playing on a continuous loop in my mind. Little by little, I hope to be able to say I love myself no matter what the vessel that holds my soul looks like on the outside.

    God bless you, BettyJo. And thanks again for being the kind, compassionate, loving soul that inspires others.

    <3 A*
  • jennifurballs
    jennifurballs Posts: 247 Member
    BRAVO!!!

    I'm so blessed to have you as an MFP friend!
  • BettJo64
    BettJo64 Posts: 760 Member
    OMG :happy: I'm so shocked and deeply touched by the warm, open, and loving responses from all of you to my post :flowerforyou: So many have sad stories of people and instances in their lives that have led them to believe that they are unworthy...less than...undesirable...simply because of their weight issues. Sometimes it's just the person herself/himself that makes this random judgment call on herself because of her extra weight. Once you lose that feeling of love for yourself, you lose hope and interest in all things about you...weight, health, looks, hygiene, living conditions, who you surround yourself with, how you carry yourself in public, and on and on and on. I just don't understand how all these very important and wonderful things about someone can be so limited or forgotten simply because of the numbers on a scale. You can be just as gorgeous at 300lbs as you can imagine being at 150lbs. darlin', CURVES are SEXY and beautiful!!! Embrace your curves and enjoy your bodies NOW while you're on the weight loss journey. Don't wait to feel good about yourself! :flowerforyou:
  • LeonCX
    LeonCX Posts: 862 Member
    I had to take extra insulin after reading this thread. :laugh:
  • Sailatsorf
    Sailatsorf Posts: 161 Member
    Sounds like you've got it figured out! In the past, I lost little bits of weight here and there, but always gained it back. Like you, I spent most of my (albeit short, so far) adult life over 200 lbs. Once I learned that self-love that you're preaching here, I managed to keep losing weight. I definitely think it takes a lot of self-love to have the dedication to get to where you want, and deserve, to be. Keep it up!
  • JtKeil
    JtKeil Posts: 1,389 Member
    Lovely post! Thanks for sharing :flowerforyou:
  • bumblebreezy91
    bumblebreezy91 Posts: 520 Member
    Great post! I struggle with loving myself at any weight. I'm always thinking, "Well, when I lose weight, I can..." or "My self-esteem will be better when I'm at my goal weight." It's hard to accept that you can love yourself at your highest weight and on the journey down to the final goal weight.
  • socalkay
    socalkay Posts: 746 Member
    :flowerforyou:
  • kimgailmarie47
    kimgailmarie47 Posts: 6 Member
    Thank you so much for this post, definitely something i can relate to as well. For so many years my weight and how i viewed myself held me back in so many areas of my life in the fear of being judged or rejected because of my weight or my outter appearance. I am a loving, caring person who would do anything i could to help others. For so long I've consistently heard I wasn't good enough and believed it to be true, but thanks to my renewal of my faith again I know I am good enough and worthy of love, joy, happiness and health. It took me looking back to all the obstacles I have faced and survived, including cancer, abuse, etc., to realize I am a survivor and no longer a victim and I am worthy. I have began to forgive myself for all my wrong doings as well as forgiving those who have hurt me. Until we love ourselves we will never be truly at peace and be able to reach any of our goals in life, including healthy weight. God bless you all and I pray that each of us will have the strength, courage, wisdom and be successful in all that we do!!!
  • readanddance
    readanddance Posts: 311 Member
    Thank you. I needed to hear that message today. Well said and so true. One moment at a time will help me continue to put your message into practice.
  • kmrubio
    kmrubio Posts: 3 Member
    Holy cow, exactly what I needed this morning. I love you too!! Keep up the great work! :flowerforyou: :happy:
  • Ruth4111gut
    Ruth4111gut Posts: 289 Member
    Thank you for sharing this wonderful message... :heart:
  • Panda_Path
    Panda_Path Posts: 86 Member
    Amen!! Self acceptance and love is one of the healthiest things to do for oneself.
  • drewmmm
    drewmmm Posts: 130 Member
    Great post!
  • 2thesexydress
    2thesexydress Posts: 54 Member
    OMG :happy: I'm so shocked and deeply touched by the warm, open, and loving responses from all of you to my post :flowerforyou: So many have sad stories of people and instances in their lives that have led them to believe that they are unworthy...less than...undesirable...simply because of their weight issues. Sometimes it's just the person herself/himself that makes this random judgment call on herself because of her extra weight. Once you lose that feeling of love for yourself, you lose hope and interest in all things about you...weight, health, looks, hygiene, living conditions, who you surround yourself with, how you carry yourself in public, and on and on and on. I just don't understand how all these very important and wonderful things about someone can be so limited or forgotten simply because of the numbers on a scale. You can be just as gorgeous at 300lbs as you can imagine being at 150lbs. darlin', CURVES are SEXY and beautiful!!! Embrace your curves and enjoy your bodies NOW while you're on the weight loss journey. Don't wait to feel good about yourself! :flowerforyou:

    Thank you for this post, i was feeling quite down today, bad news through the week made me step back into the dark feelings and its been a struggle today. I haven't dated for years now because of the weight i am, i think if i don't like seeing me naked i am sure a guy is not going to like it, so i have been put off dating for so long, then i was doing okay with the liking myself for 5 weeks till i heard of a friend who took his own life, and then i went back to feeling doomed.

    Great post, and thank you for sharing it xx
  • Miss_1999
    Miss_1999 Posts: 747 Member
    Thank you for posting this! You are right! I have been at 400lbs, and I'm at 221. something now. I didn't see a 400lbs woman when I looked in the mirror back then. I went to the tanning bed. I fixed my hair, I did my make up, wore perfume and fashionable clothing, hygiene has ALWAYS been at the top of my list, no matter what my size. I've always believed in taking care of myself, and being the best "me", no matter what weight. Loving myself is something I had to do for me! I'm SO proud of you for doing this for you, and realizing your worth! That is isn't a number on a scale, but it's what's inside. That your beauty radiates from the inside out, and that the things you're doing for you are because YOU want to! Not because anyone else wants or tells you to do so! You take pride in yourself!

    Everyone here has worth, and is worth it! Loving themselves now, as they are, will most definitely help you (and general you) to stay motivated, to realize that you're worth it to be healthy, to be happy, and that you deserve nothing less than the best life has to offer! Best wishes on your journey! Keep up the good work! :flowerforyou:
  • mellyw78
    mellyw78 Posts: 14 Member
    Great post :)
  • fitfabforties
    fitfabforties Posts: 370 Member
    good for you......why wait indeed...great to hear that you can feel that way.....

    I've lost weight and I still don't love myself

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