Ladies, does HE drive u CRAZY during ur weightloss journey?

It sounds like he needs to be educated on this topic, clearly he believes many myths. Maybe try to show him pictures (there's plenty of threads on here that show pics of weight lifting females) and show him that the women that lift don't look at all bulky and look much better then those that don't. Men are sometimes visual creatures so providing pictures may help him see that he's wrong.
Also, you could print out many studies and articles on this topic and highlight the power points for him, to help him see the truth.

If that doesn't work, dump him and go find a man that knows what he is talking about...lol!!!!!!

Maybe you could take him to the gym with you and he could talk to a trainer to learn about weight lifting. Sounds like he doesn't know much. Would he trust a weight lifting website? Sounds like he doesn't trust what you say about it so you might be able to introduce him to a source of information he'll trust.

not had that particular issue but mine does have some odd ideas. Mostly due to ignorance/poor education in the wrong items.

He was good when I talked to him about it though! I found it a scary topic to talk about (totally my issues, nothing to do with him) but once I did I had good results.

mine does that too. he also tells me how to do all kind of things he doesnt do himself.

he likes to repeat over and over to lift light but many reps, and not too heavy.

in my case though i am already a rather sturdy woman, and with a hormonal imbalance of too much testosterone, so i guess i see where he might be coming from... i mean why he might be a little paranoid.

still i do what i want.

Lifting can get you what you want. 'Toned' (is a misnomer, it translates to lower body fat to let the under lying muscle show through, it is definition) is just a lower body fat %. If you look around the site you will see many women that lift, the ones that compete...do not look like they do during competition the rest of the year. When they prep they cut to a very low bf% <15% (this is low for a female) and dehydrate in many photos taken at competition. The 'bulkier' women put a lot of effort towards muscle gains and eat in a surplus, many also have a higher bf% so the thin layer of fat over their muscles produces an even 'bulkier' look....it will not happen by accident unless you have a medical condition that cause excess testosterone.

My goal is 18-20% bf, the way I describe my goal is lean with curves (squat booty), slight shadow lines (definition) but able to flex and make my muscles and the lines show a good amount. Plus nothing jiggling unless I want it to jiggle.




These are not perfect examples because we each carry our weight differently but it does give a good idea of what different bf% look like. If you don't want super cut, then don't cut your bf% that low (eating in a deficient)....If you don't want larger muscles then don't eat in a surplus. Lifting allows you to retain more of your lean body mass while losing weight, it also allows you to shape your body how you want....you can't decide where fat builds up but you can help direct muscle formation and shape.

* the women pictured at the 2 lowest ranges are flexing....that is not how they look just standing around.

woman cant bulk up they dont have the testosterone... our bodies are different now if your going for body building maybe he is intimated by that LOL... but just reasure him of your goals and that YOU will always be his feminine woman but just able to kick his *kitten* hahaha good luck

Well, that's not true. Women CAN bulk up, it's just extremely hard to do. It takes a massive amount of dedication and has to be done deliberately. Heavy lifting, protein bulking, etc. It's a full time job to be done by women who specifically want to compete in body building competitions. A woman isn't going to bulk up by accident, doing heavy lifting for body recomp.

Keep your rep range in the 15-20 with full range of motion can help then, since that's considered the more endurance side of lifting. About 20 though is max for actually causing gains of muscle.

But you can do any program, and as the BF is lower where you like the look, start increasing the reps, and keep the weight level where it's at, on the bar and on you.

Lifting can get you what you want. 'Toned' (is a misnomer, it translates to lower body fat to let the under lying muscle show through, it is definition) is just a lower body fat %. If you look around the site you will see many women that lift, the ones that compete...do not look like they do during competition the rest of the year. When they prep they cut to a very low bf% <15% (this is low for a female) and dehydrate in many photos taken at competition. The 'bulkier' women put a lot of effort towards muscle gains and eat in a surplus, many also have a higher bf% so the thin layer of fat over their muscles produces an even 'bulkier' look....it will not happen by accident unless you have a medical condition that cause excess testosterone.

My goal is 18-20% bf, the way I describe my goal is lean with curves (squat booty), slight shadow lines (definition) but able to flex and make my muscles and the lines show a good amount. Plus nothing jiggling unless I want it to jiggle.




These are not perfect examples because we each carry our weight differently but it does give a good idea of what different bf% look like. If you don't want super cut, then don't cut your bf% that low (eating in a deficient)....If you don't want larger muscles then don't eat in a surplus. Lifting allows you to retain more of your lean body mass while losing weight, it also allows you to shape your body how you want....you can't decide where fat builds up but you can help direct muscle formation and shape.

* the women pictured at the 2 lowest ranges are flexing....that is not how they look just standing around.

Awesome. Thanks for this. I'm going to keep this in mind as I settle on my fitness goals.

Like others mentioned, it can take years and strict determination for women to really get bulky.
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I lift heavy, that is me not flexed. Not sure if you think I look "bulky" or "manly"

Ok so here's the thing, I have around 30 more lbs to lose for my goal and I want that loss to be mostly fat (don't we all?) so Ive been doing a combination of cardio and strength training and lost 70 lbs in the process.
Here's the issue, whenever my fiancee hears the word weight training he panics and gets upset thinking I am doing it wrong because I will be "bulky" and look "manly" and what I should be doing is cardio and 4 lbs weights!!

I am a petite woman at 5'.05 and currently weight 160 lbs with ~29% bf and 117 LBM, which adds to my fiancee's concern because he believes I already have "too much muscle" and more lifting will only make me look masculine

I find it frustrating. I was wondering if anyone else in the same boat?

P.S subject too long, hence the "ur"

I'm in your boat in that I'm petite (5'1"), but have naturally larger muscles than most other women my height. However, Mr. Pineapple is currently bulking (while I'm losing), but wouldn't mind if I did. He's a fan of the muscle definition that's been revealed as I've lost fat. (He's a bit jealous of my family's natural muscular build.) But you won't physically bulk or increase muscle mass unless you're trying; eating a surplus, increased protein, regular heavy lifting, etc. It's unlikely your muscles will get bigger while eating at a deficit.

What bugs me about your post is his commenting that you already have "too much muscle". Negative comments on your appearance, especially about something you generally can't change like natural musculature, is not cool.