is there anyone like me?

I want to lose weight but I don't want to put in the work. I know what you all are thinking after reading that first sentence but before you judge me at least give me credit for being honest. I mean whats the point in me lying about it? I gotta be honest with myself and you all if I want the help and trust me I do want help. I just don't know how to remain consistent. I always start a plan and never finish it. im not afraid of working out or sweating. im 31 years old and has no health issues other than some stomach problems. theres no reason why I cant do this. I just don't want to. well I do but I want more of a quick fix and I know that's not the route to go.

im open to whatever anyone has to say good or bad. I don't care what you say or how you say it.....JUST SAY IT! I really need the motivation. help me get this started again. im begging for any advice. my diary is open. its a mess, but im not embarrassed. please tell me what I need to change. share your stories, workout plans, eating plans, whatever. im open to anything at this point. thanks
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Replies

  • nina07111
    nina07111 Posts: 25 Member
    To be successful you have to be willing to put in some work, but you can start slowly making small changes at first and you will start to see results, which in turn will motivate you and make you want to keep at it. I just took a quick look at your diary and you can start by making small adjustments such as substituting that 16oz cup of OJ, which has a whooping 58gm of sugar with half the amount or half juice half water combination. Eliminate the butter from your eggs and use a cooking spray instead. For two large eggs you would be looking at about 150 calories instead.

    I'm not an expert by any stretch and have only been at this for 45 days, but I have already noticed that small changes can make a big impact.
  • MissMissle
    MissMissle Posts: 293 Member
    I don't want to do the work either. I don't want to. I hate working out, I hate eating smaller amounts.

    But, you just do it - because - it's either work - or hating yourself - at least for me.

    I still mess up - I think I was over my calories every day this week - but I still do it - I still log and go to the gym and just do it, and hate every single second of it.

    It's just what you got to do if you want anything to change.

    I also hate my job, its soul sucking, depressing, and horrible. But I do it, because I have to. i kind of think of logging food and losing weight the same way. Except at least the weight loss will pay off and make me happy in the end :-)
  • headofphat
    headofphat Posts: 1,597 Member
    To be honest and not to sound too cheesy but i don't consider my workouts "work". I enjoy the time to myself, earbuds in and doing my own thing without my job or wife or kids bothering me. I get to clear my head and enjoy some alone time. I also get to look in a mirror and slowly see my abs pop so nope i don't consider it "work" at all.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    Honestly everyone would want a quick fix. Does not exist. Well lipo and surgery is the quick fix. Expensive BTW

    Everyone I am sure would like to be able to out exercise a poor diet Does not exist. I wish I could for this one.

    two negative point to elaborate more on.
    I always start a plan and never finish it.
    Do you not true see a imaginary new you at your weight goal? I know I need one and I need to hop in the bod pod to farther look into a goal.
    I want to lose weight but I don't want to put in the work.

    Losing weight is not easy. It takes a lot to figure out what works for you whether it is a diet, exercise, or both.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    hard things take work.

    being mediocre takes no effort at all.

    I personally refuse to believe that I"m going to spend my time here on earth being a mediocre lump of lazy.
    I hate being hungry all the time- but I want something more than I hate being hungry- so I deal with one to get the other.
    You have to find what you are willing to do and what you are willing to be or not.

    If you are okay with that the not part- then you don't need any validation or anything else, but if you want to make changes and be a better person- you're going to have be uncomfortable and push yourself.

    No one got better without some pressure- change and good things come from pressure. All things in nature require a catalyst. You either come through the other side or you quit without ever starting.

    That's on you. And no one can do anything- change anything- fix or motivate you to change that situation- you have to do it for yourself- with your own *kitten* kicking.
  • csec6pak
    csec6pak Posts: 54 Member
    There have been times in my life where I was like you. I'm sure there will be more times like that in the future. Not just about weight loss but really about any aspect of my life. I wanted things to change, but I didn't want to do the work. So what happened? Nothing changed. Then I finally hit rock bottom, got tired enough of the excuses I was making to myself, and started working on it. I think you just have to come to that point where things are bad enough that you want to start doing the work. You're clearly not there yet. I know that for me, there is nothing anyone could have said to motivate me. I had to come to it on my own, even though it was painful.
  • onefortyone
    onefortyone Posts: 531 Member
    For me, the eating part is hardly work - we all know how to write a list and go grocery shopping, so we can all meal plan! We all know how to use the internet, so browsing for healthy delicious recipes isn't much work either, and reducing portions is just a matter of looking on the package for a normal serving size instead of eyeballing, or weighing 4oz of meat.

    The exercise part is gonna be work, but you don't have to slaughter yourself. You don't even have to set foot in a gym. It can be as simple as taking up an active hobby - hiking on the weekends, cycling, running, walking, snow-shoeing.

    So the trick is to enjoy the journey - if you do activities and eat foods that you enjoy, then it'll feel more like a hobby than a strict set of rules. Don't forget you'll have to maintain it for the rest of your life.
  • I think it can be extremely overwhelming when you look at how far you have to go. It almost psyches you out before you start. My suggestion, would be like some others on here, to start with small goals. Instead of trying to climb a giant mountain, start small. Take a look at what your doing now, and identify one thing you can work on.

    Exercise: . can you commit to physical activity for 10 min a day. There are so many great youtube videos that provide short bursts of exercise. My favorite is the fitnessblender channel.

    For food goals, can you commit to replacing one meal with a salad each day, or maybe coming up with a healthy breakfast option?

    Just find one thing to start. And once you have maintained that goal for a few weeks, add another small goal. You can do it. Don't let that mountain psyche you out! Good luck.
  • mommamandyloo
    mommamandyloo Posts: 19 Member
    I'll be the *****.
    As someone working her *kitten* off... and having said *kitten* go nowhere....
    Don't whine until you do the work. You clearly don't want the weight off as badly as you think.

    Its a choice of choosing what you want more. The weight loss... or the pizza on the couch. As a good friend of mine tells me, "You can't get the *kitten* you want by siting on the one you have."
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    When you are ready, you will put in the work. Because you won't see any change unless and until you do.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    If you aren't motivated to do it, why do you think anything anyone here says is going to make you do it? You either want it or you don't. That's up to you.

    I will tell you the one and only thing that helped me: I reminded myself that I always regretted not exercising but I never regretted exercising (except the time I fell rollerblading and broke both my arms ...).
  • Jennifer10723
    Jennifer10723 Posts: 374 Member
    I read something once that said .. Being fat is hard, being fit is hard .. pick your hard.

    It honestly comes down to your frame of mind. If you aren't in the right mind frame, it isn't going to work for you. You can tell yourself you don't want to do it .. or you can tell yourself you do. It is allllll in your control.

    I also tell myself .. you can't be upset with results you didn't get for work you didn't do.
  • Not trying to be mean here, but if you don't want to put any work into this and get your hand's dirty so to speak, it's just not going to work. You have to get your mind right if you are ever going to be successful. You said your diary is a mess, then clean it up, that is IF YOU WANT IT ENOUGH. Good luck to you.
  • I hope you've found some motivation in the responses. I applaud you for being honest. I can definitely relate to what you've said here. I've learned to now worry about how many times I start and stop something. Worrying is a meditation on *kitten* and I'm not going to be worried. Whatever I do I want to own it. There was a time I owned being fat, I owned my poor diet, I owned my poor health. I still didn't want to workout. But there would be a moment, an instance, where I'd make one better choice, even if that meant something as simple as not eating that last cookie or drinking that last soda. Slowly, slower than a snail going uphill in molasses in January, I wanted to own less of my unhealthy choices and more healthier ones. I've decided now that what's more important to me is to be healthy no matter the cost. I still wish I didn't have to work out, but now I see it as a means to an end. I can talk myself in and out of all kinds of situations. So now I'm choosing to be healthier. Again, I applaud you for being so candid. I think that speaks volumes to knowing yourself well. And I think that's the type of thinking that if you continue, you'll find yourself right where you want to be. Because if and when you "start again" you'll be doing it, not to finish some program you paid for, or to please someone else, you'll be doing it because you want to.
  • lorib642
    lorib642 Posts: 1,942 Member
    You have lost 5 lbs already, so you have been doing something. I am pretty new at this and I don't want to have to make changes but I know if I don't I will stay where I am. I am still trying to figure things out. Do you think you are trying to make too many changes at once? It can seem overwhelming. I am doing one thing at a time.

    If you want to vent about how much you don't like things like counting calories or exercise I'll listen. I don't particularly like them either. But, don't let that discourage you from doing it anyways. (whatever changes you plan to make). Change can be hard. I've given up before, but I am determined to follow through this time and make some lasting changes.
  • I spent 2 yrs of my life trying to find the easy way to lose weight. I tried every pills I read about. It doesn't work. I didn't want to work out, count calories or even eat healthy. Then in June, a friend of mine told me about Fitbit. My thoughts were I wasted how much money in the past trying to lose weight, I'll try this. It wasn't a work out, just counting my steps, sounded easy enough and at least I now had something to keep me accountable. Then I found MFP linked to my Fitbit. My first few weeks looked HORRIBLE for both. My calories were thru the roof & my steps, I was under 5000 steps for the day. (daily recommended steps is 10,000). Then I got sick with an upper respiratory infection (it didn't help I was a smoker also). I was able to finally get my calorie intake under control but my steps really dropped. Right then & there I wanted to quit everything. It was too hard, took to much effort, nothing was happening yet with my weight. I did try one more time to start again, that day while walking I thought I was going to have a heart attack. I stopped dead in my tracks & made up my mind right then & there I was going to change my life for the better. I quit smoking, monitor all my calorie intact (yes I still have some bad days where I go a little over) My step are now averaging about 13,000/day. I'm trying to add little things to my day that help to lose weight or tone up, nothing major. To date, I turned 51 on 9/24. I haven't smoked for over 6 wks, I lost 12 lbs so far but better then that I lost 6 inches off my waist & 6 3/4 inches off my hips & dropped 1 pants size. Are there days I don't want to count calories or walk, you better beleive it. Are there days I wish there was a miracle pill to make my healthier & skinnier, you bet. DoI enjoy being able to say, "look what I did so far!!" ? This is what makes it all worthwhile for me. Because "I" made the difference happen!!! It may only be a small step to some but for me it's a major leap!!
  • branflakes1980
    branflakes1980 Posts: 2,516 Member
    To be honest and not to sound too cheesy but i don't consider my workouts "work". I enjoy the time to myself, earbuds in and doing my own thing without my job or wife or kids bothering me. I get to clear my head and enjoy some alone time. I also get to look in a mirror and slowly see my abs pop so nope i don't consider it "work" at all.

    QFT! Although, at first I did think of it as work. I would struggle every day because it was hard, and some days I didn't have the motivation, or the desire to do anything. I was tired and I would try to make excuses not to go. But eventually the want outweighed the excuses and I would go and get it done. Quickly I realized that "tired or depressed feeling" that I felt was almost non existant when I regularly worked out. I started seeing results, and I had never felt more full of life and energy. Sure there are still days where the stresses and worries of every day life or lack of sleep get to me but all in all I feel better than I ever have and 2 years into my journey to be the best me I can be I am like you, I look forward to my time in the gym. If a conflict in schedule interferes with my gym time I work around it because now, missing a day is just not an option, nor do I want it to be. OP just do it. Stick it out and you will get to this point! Good luck to you :flowerforyou:
  • wyattj99
    wyattj99 Posts: 454 Member
    I want to lose weight but I don't want to put in the work. I know what you all are thinking after reading that first sentence but before you judge me at least give me credit for being honest. I mean whats the point in me lying about it? I gotta be honest with myself and you all if I want the help and trust me I do want help. I just don't know how to remain consistent. I always start a plan and never finish it. im not afraid of working out or sweating. im 31 years old and has no health issues other than some stomach problems. theres no reason why I cant do this. I just don't want to. well I do but I want more of a quick fix and I know that's not the route to go.

    im open to whatever anyone has to say good or bad. I don't care what you say or how you say it.....JUST SAY IT! I really need the motivation. help me get this started again. im begging for any advice. my diary is open. its a mess, but im not embarrassed. please tell me what I need to change. share your stories, workout plans, eating plans, whatever. im open to anything at this point. thanks

    My advice - learn the 80/20 rule. 80% Good healthy choices. 20% bad choices in which as time goes you can break that 20% to 10/10 10% bad choices and 10% working out. It takes time, pre planning your foods and take out all junk out of the house. Really is that simple.
  • prettigirl01
    prettigirl01 Posts: 548 Member
    There have been times in my life where I was like you. I'm sure there will be more times like that in the future. Not just about weight loss but really about any aspect of my life. I wanted things to change, but I didn't want to do the work. So what happened? Nothing changed. Then I finally hit rock bottom, got tired enough of the excuses I was making to myself, and started working on it. I think you just have to come to that point where things are bad enough that you want to start doing the work. You're clearly not there yet. I know that for me, there is nothing anyone could have said to motivate me. I had to come to it on my own, even though it was painful.
    very well said. thank you
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    Don't be upset by the results you didn't get from the work you didn't do.

    If it's THAT much work for you and you don't want to do it, you have chosen exercise you don't like. And really, who wants to get up every day and do something they hate? You need to find something you like to do and do it.
  • prettigirl01
    prettigirl01 Posts: 548 Member
    I hope you've found some motivation in the responses. I applaud you for being honest. I can definitely relate to what you've said here. I've learned to now worry about how many times I start and stop something. Worrying is a meditation on *kitten* and I'm not going to be worried. Whatever I do I want to own it. There was a time I owned being fat, I owned my poor diet, I owned my poor health. I still didn't want to workout. But there would be a moment, an instance, where I'd make one better choice, even if that meant something as simple as not eating that last cookie or drinking that last soda. Slowly, slower than a snail going uphill in molasses in January, I wanted to own less of my unhealthy choices and more healthier ones. I've decided now that what's more important to me is to be healthy no matter the cost. I still wish I didn't have to work out, but now I see it as a means to an end. I can talk myself in and out of all kinds of situations. So now I'm choosing to be healthier. Again, I applaud you for being so candid. I think that speaks volumes to knowing yourself well. And I think that's the type of thinking that if you continue, you'll find yourself right where you want to be. Because if and when you "start again" you'll be doing it, not to finish some program you paid for, or to please someone else, you'll be doing it because you want to.
    not to sound corny but this really almost made me tear up. thank you so much for your response
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    JSF. You either really want it or you don't. If you don't give up for now. When you really want it you will do it.
  • prettigirl01
    prettigirl01 Posts: 548 Member
    I really appreciate you all taking the time to respond to this I really do. thank you. it means a lot and I will take everything everyone has said into this journey with me. like I said there are no excuses as to why I am doing this to myself. I either want it or I don't and I want to show the world that I do. my problem is trying to make too many big changes at once and it is overwhelming for me. im trying to move to fast and look for results too soon. when I hear that someone has long 12 pounds I feel like I need to rush into some type of plan so that I can lose as well and I know it doesn't work like that. I continue to fall but I will always get back up and try again. I don't want to stay down. I am going to do this!
  • AmyG1982
    AmyG1982 Posts: 1,040 Member
    I think most of us can relate (whether people want to admit it or not). I was super lazy, if I hadn't been I wouldn't have gotten to a staggering 245 lbs! But I made small changes I can live with and made a commitment to myself. Baby steps. Keep trying. Find ways to make it fun and make sure its something you can maintain for a long time. (I have an exercise bike in my living room and PVR all my favourite shows and only let myself watch them if I'm on the bike (and pedalling lol). When some shows are really good I don't even really notice that I'm exercising and many times go longer than I'd intended to.)

    I've cut out most processed foods (not saying this is the key to success, just the key for me) and exercise pretty much every day (but only for like 15-25 min cuz I get bored lol). I have a cheat meal every week and slip up when the ice cream fairy comes to visit but I keep trying. I've lost almost 30 lbs in the last 3 months and feel amazing for it. Once you start seeing results its a lot easier to maintain the effort.

    Good luck!
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
    As another poster said---maybe you're not ready for this right now. After a few more years of gaining and sitting around, you may wake up and get motivation. Maybe not. Everyone on here has to decide for themselves to make a change. Changes become habit and there you go--off to the races! I sincerely wish you the best and hope you decide to make those changes now----so next year you'll be glad you did. :smile:
  • my problem is trying to make too many big changes at once and it is overwhelming for me. im trying to move to fast and look for results too soon. when I hear that someone has long 12 pounds I feel like I need to rush into some type of plan so that I can lose as well and I know it doesn't work like that. I continue to fall but I will always get back up and try again. I don't want to stay down. I am going to do this!

    ^ ^ ^ With this mind set - You already won half the battle! Don't give up!!! You will get there!!
  • MizTerry
    MizTerry Posts: 3,763 Member
    This is why I began with martial arts, because I have zero motivation on my own. Now I do that, the gym and power walks. I try to do SOMETHING every day. It does become habit if you keep it up.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    You just have to want it bad enough. It took me 10 years...
  • ASH2038602
    ASH2038602 Posts: 215 Member
    I often dont want to put the work in, but I do it anyways. This isn't a vanity thing for me ( I am not saying doing it for vanity is bad.) This is my health, my body, and mine AND my sons future. I am fighting for my ****ing life here. I am only 25 years old, and was damned sick of sitting on a park bench watching other people playing with their kids, I was sick of feeling sick all the time, I was sick of wondering if I would die in my 40's like some family members. I dont want to work a lot of times, but I get off my *kitten* and do it anyways.
  • quellybelly
    quellybelly Posts: 827 Member
    I read this quote somewhere on MFP earlier today and it seems appropriate:

    Working out is hard.
    Being fat is hard.
    Pick one.

    No one can force you to do anything you don't want to do. You just have to flip a switch one day and decide that you're in it for good and follow through. You have all the tools you need to start getting into shape so no excuses!