not eating much, and gaining!

if you just gave birth, you are expecting too much from your body too soon. you don't need a diet, you need TIME.
give yourself a break. you won't look like this forever. it is nice to be a surrogate, but if you can't be healthy (mentally) about the weight you gain with a pregnancy, it might not be a good idea for you in the future.

okay thank you guys so much!

I 'm gonna chime in, even though you may no longer be looking at your thread ...
There are two ways you can easily determine the amount of food you are eating ... based on your hand and palm is one way, and based on dividing a plate into 4 parts is the other ...

Plate method ... use a small plate ... like 9" instead of those large 11-12 inch ones. Visually divide the plate into 4 sections. Load vegetables on 2 of the sections ... salad, broccoli, cauliflower, mixed vegetables, .... whatever you like but make certain it is not a starchy vegetable (like potato, peas, carrots) ... On one of the other quarters of your plate, put your protein. On the last quarter of yor plate, add a starch ... here is where you can put a roll, or a potato, or pasta, or rice ... or that piece of corn on the cob. That would be your dinner. ... for lunch, have a smoothie made with some milk or yogurt, some fruit, maybe a tablespoon of peanut butter ... whip it up in your blender and enjoy. .... for breakfast ... have a little something ... an egg, a piece of meat left over from the night before, a slice of pizza ... or even just drink a glass of milk or eat a 6 ounce yogurt..... or eat your lunch at dinner time and your dinner at lunch time if you want ... just be certain to get in one good meal.


For the hand method ...
google it and you will find lots of interesting images ...just google "hand method of measuring food portions" .... you won't need to spend money on a scale if you can't or don't think you will stick to using it.

Good luck.

I always thought that "starvation mode" was complete BS until it happened. Here is what happened to me: I decreased my calorie targets from 0.5 lbs. to 1 lb. per week loss. This gave me a target of 1,680 calories. Within a week, I noticed I was gaining weight. This continued for the next 3 weeks... I ended up gaining 5.1 lbs. in total, with a calorie deficit! So I read somewhere that I should not eat less than my RMR. So I used an online calculator, and my RMR was 1,747. So I raised my calorie goal to 1,930 (targeting 1/2 lb./week weight loss again). That was less than 1 week ago, and I've lost 5.9 lbs. since (so I'm 0.8 lbs. less than 3 weeks ago). I don't expect to continue to see 6 lbs./week loss, but I'm now convinced that there is a real thing as "starvation mode" based on that experience.

I always thought that "starvation mode" was complete BS until it happened. Here is what happened to me: I decreased my calorie targets from 0.5 lbs. to 1 lb. per week loss. This gave me a target of 1,680 calories. Within a week, I noticed I was gaining weight. This continued for the next 3 weeks... I ended up gaining 5.1 lbs. in total, with a calorie deficit! So I read somewhere that I should not eat less than my RMR. So I used an online calculator, and my RMR was 1,747. So I raised my calorie goal to 1,930 (targeting 1/2 lb./week weight loss again). That was less than 1 week ago, and I've lost 5.9 lbs. since (so I'm 0.8 lbs. less than 3 weeks ago). I don't expect to continue to see 6 lbs./week loss, but I'm now convinced that there is a real thing as "starvation mode" based on that experience.

You lost five lbs? In a week?

I'm sorry. But that sounds like something else was going on (not starvation mode)

Well, everyone else already covered the fact that you're not eating enough...which is good. Because you're not. It's not good for you, it's not healthy, and you don't have to do that to lose weight. If you don't *like* to eat, learn to eat more calorie dense foods (cottage cheese, peanut butter, avocado, etc.) in order to get those extra calories you need without having to have a huge meal. I have a tricky stomach... some days I can eat tons, some days I can barely hold anything down, but I still get my calories every day.

Anyway, another thing to consider is that you mention you don't feel comfortable with your body since pregnancy... some of it may just be pregnancy weight, sure, but pregnancy can often permanently alter the body. After my first baby, I lost the baby weight (and then some), and *still* couldn't fit a lot of my old clothes because my rib cage had expanded. Pants fit differently too because of loose, wobbly skin. My feet are also bigger too. This happens to a lot of women, and may be part of what's going on with you. Just something to think on.

I always thought that "starvation mode" was complete BS until it happened. Here is what happened to me: I decreased my calorie targets from 0.5 lbs. to 1 lb. per week loss. This gave me a target of 1,680 calories. Within a week, I noticed I was gaining weight. This continued for the next 3 weeks... I ended up gaining 5.1 lbs. in total, with a calorie deficit! So I read somewhere that I should not eat less than my RMR. So I used an online calculator, and my RMR was 1,747. So I raised my calorie goal to 1,930 (targeting 1/2 lb./week weight loss again). That was less than 1 week ago, and I've lost 5.9 lbs. since (so I'm 0.8 lbs. less than 3 weeks ago). I don't expect to continue to see 6 lbs./week loss, but I'm now convinced that there is a real thing as "starvation mode" based on that experience.

Something to keep in mind as well - your body is complex. It can "hold onto" weight even with your best efforts, and then all of a sudden drop a bunch all at once - this is not starvation mode, but something that some people's bodies do as a reaction to weight loss. I experience this at times. One explanation is that the fat cells release some fat stores, but hold water in its place and then all of a sudden release it (again metabolism is complex). I DO NOT believe in starvation mode (unless you are dealing with long term severe anorexia in which the body is trying to survive extreme low calorie intake for long periods of time), but I do believe that you can affect your metabolism positively and negatively to some small degree and that everyone has a calorie "sweet spot" for weight loss - energy and steady loss both maintained. I also believe eating a range of calories based on your hunger and exercise level.

I always thought that "starvation mode" was complete BS until it happened. Here is what happened to me: I decreased my calorie targets from 0.5 lbs. to 1 lb. per week loss. This gave me a target of 1,680 calories. Within a week, I noticed I was gaining weight. This continued for the next 3 weeks... I ended up gaining 5.1 lbs. in total, with a calorie deficit! So I read somewhere that I should not eat less than my RMR. So I used an online calculator, and my RMR was 1,747. So I raised my calorie goal to 1,930 (targeting 1/2 lb./week weight loss again). That was less than 1 week ago, and I've lost 5.9 lbs. since (so I'm 0.8 lbs. less than 3 weeks ago). I don't expect to continue to see 6 lbs./week loss, but I'm now convinced that there is a real thing as "starvation mode" based on that experience.

Something to keep in mind as well - your body is complex. It can "hold onto" weight even with your best efforts, and then all of a sudden drop a bunch all at once - this is not starvation mode, but something that some people's bodies do as a reaction to weight loss. I experience this at times. One explanation is that the fat cells release some fat stores, but hold water in its place and then all of a sudden release it (again metabolism is complex). I DO NOT believe in starvation mode (unless you are dealing with long term severe anorexia in which the body is trying to survive extreme low calorie intake for long periods of time), but I do believe that you can affect your metabolism positively and negatively to some small degree and that everyone has a calorie "sweet spot" for weight loss - energy and steady loss both maintained. I also believe eating a range of calories based on your hunger and exercise level.

Yes, I've had that happen several times where I have a plateau and then finally see a large loss. I've read some research, probably the same that you have read that discusses fat cells taking on water and then finally dropping it all. That would explain a plateau. I didn't have a plateau... I had a significant gain after cutting calories.

I always thought that "starvation mode" was complete BS until it happened. Here is what happened to me: I decreased my calorie targets from 0.5 lbs. to 1 lb. per week loss. This gave me a target of 1,680 calories. Within a week, I noticed I was gaining weight. This continued for the next 3 weeks... I ended up gaining 5.1 lbs. in total, with a calorie deficit! So I read somewhere that I should not eat less than my RMR. So I used an online calculator, and my RMR was 1,747. So I raised my calorie goal to 1,930 (targeting 1/2 lb./week weight loss again). That was less than 1 week ago, and I've lost 5.9 lbs. since (so I'm 0.8 lbs. less than 3 weeks ago). I don't expect to continue to see 6 lbs./week loss, but I'm now convinced that there is a real thing as "starvation mode" based on that experience.

Something to keep in mind as well - your body is complex. It can "hold onto" weight even with your best efforts, and then all of a sudden drop a bunch all at once - this is not starvation mode, but something that some people's bodies do as a reaction to weight loss. I experience this at times. One explanation is that the fat cells release some fat stores, but hold water in its place and then all of a sudden release it (again metabolism is complex). I DO NOT believe in starvation mode (unless you are dealing with long term severe anorexia in which the body is trying to survive extreme low calorie intake for long periods of time), but I do believe that you can affect your metabolism positively and negatively to some small degree and that everyone has a calorie "sweet spot" for weight loss - energy and steady loss both maintained. I also believe eating a range of calories based on your hunger and exercise level.

Yes, I've had that happen several times where I have a plateau and then finally see a large loss. I've read some research, probably the same that you have read that discusses fat cells taking on water and then finally dropping it all. That would explain a plateau. I didn't have a plateau... I had a significant gain after cutting calories.

Probably because you were eating more than you even realize. Easy to do if you are hungry. I would bet that if you were in a controlled environment with only access to food was what and when others gave it to you, you would not have "gained" on fewer calories. It simply isn't possible. If your body requires 1500 calories to live and maintain your weight, there is no way you can gain if you only consume 1200. There have been tons of studies to prove this. And "starvation mode" doesn't mean gaining Weight when eating less calories, it means losing less weight than might be expected when consuming x amount of calories. Your body gets better at using less energy to process the calories, so you are actually requiring less calories- which is why it appears that you are losing less than you should because the changes in metabolic requirements aren't being evaluated by the individual.

Sure, take the easy way out and tell me I didn't measure or record properly. Continue on and tell me that I recorded properly for several weeks, and then I lowered my calories goals and magically stopped recording everything I ate. Then, continue on and tell me that once I raised my calorie goals again, I started recording accurately and losing again... because I wasn't as hungry. Does that make sense?! Of course not! Nice try, though... if you don't have an explanation you like, just tell me I'm not recording properly during that specific time frame that I gained weight. Never mind that I was even more hungry than normal and yes, I fought hard to not give in to food cravings, but I didn't eat without recording everything I ate and at the quantities I ate.