How do you make it a lifestyle change?

Sounds like everything you outlined in your first paragraph, particularly the kiddos, should be reason enough. My motivation is so my kid doesn't have an out of shape douche for a dad.

Also, the beauty of running is that the roads are free and you don't need to pay entries to run 3.1 miles. Rather than running a bunch of 5Ks, why not pick one that is for a cause that hits close to home like... diabetes? Make your goals revolve around your likes and values, whether it be foods, workouts, kids, etc.

It sounds like you are pretty active, so it may be that diet is your biggest challenge. Food is the hardest for me too. It is becoming a lifestyle for me more and more, maybe some of the things that worked for me can help you. My biggest issue is binge eating. One thing that helps me is with that is pre-portioning meals (for example, overnight oats weighed out and put in a jar the night before, prepping meals for the entire week and storing them in tupperware, weighing out servings of nuts/other snacks into small containers and eating out of that instead of the big bag). Portion control is key. If you don't have a food scale, get one. It is the best investment in weight loss I have ever made. When you are out and don't have a food scale available, use visual tricks to try and gauge a portion size. (Here's an image of what I mean: http://33.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lsw43aZ1rn1qgh9aoo1_500.jpg but its helpful to weigh it out yourself; the more you do so, the better you will get at estimating portions when you're eating out) Another lifestyle change for me was changing rules about what I eat on a daily basis. I do not buy foods that I will overeat so that they aren't in the house. Even if someone at work brings in a treat or buys lunch, if it isn't what I planned to eat that day or within my personal rules, I don't eat it. The key to making it a true change rather than a diet is removing the decision-making from it. If you have to debate with yourself over whether or not to eat that cookie, it takes a lot of willpower, and eventually you'll be tired or grumpy and willpower will buckle. Make it a habit. You just never eat cookies unless you pre-log it, or it's homemade, or a special occasion, etc. Create your own workable rules to live by. Find tricks that help you, and make them habits too (like always drink a glass of water before a meal, start meals with a salad and broth based soup (low calories, high volume, to fill you up before your main dish), pack up the leftovers before you sit down to eat your single portion).

In terms of exercise, find goals to work towards that are free. Do push ups every morning when you wake up, and track how many you can do, aiming to add 10 to your max. Try holding a plank or wall sit, aim to increase how long you can do it for. Find a place to hike (or just a big hill) and time how long it takes you to climb it, then do it each week and keep trying to break your record. Have you checked meetup.com to see if there are any active groups in your area?

It takes time, but eventually it does become second nature! Keep at it!

make it a lifestyle change by setting reasonable goals you can attain. by eating foods you love. (you dont HAVE to eat diet food, i dont, but i do know what to avoid and what a serving size is) and doing exersizes you like. track even when you dont want to until it is second nature. get involved and make friends on here if you dont already have them, they will make you want to be better and help keep you focused. by experimenting and not being afraid to adjust your plan until you find one that suits you. by giving yourself a break without letting yourself fall off track.

remember that doing something off plan is not a failure unless you say "oh well, i failed, its over"

just say well, its done, and start again.

allow yourself treats and even days where you care a little less about your intake

always know what your TDEE is and if you go over at least try not to go over that.

fall in love with the feeling of health.

find out what it is that made you gain weight in the first place, and love yourself enough to work on it. it isnt about anyone else, it is about you taking care of you. and that is not only ok, but it is the only way you can take care of anyone else.


i want to add, i tried many times but it wasnt until i changed my thinking that i got to this point, and i know that i will succeed this time. because i stopped thinking i was on a diet, and that it was a chore. i decided just to be better and make it something i could live with and not be constantly feeling like i was compromising. nobody elses plan will make you happy. you just have to adjust yours until it suits you.

Making it a habit, and finding something I really enjoyed doing good luck!

So, please help!! Tell me how you managed and give me any tips you have.

one day at a time. seriously. i have one goal to meet each day... stay on plan. that means eating my macros, getting to the gym and doing my workout for that day (whatever it happens to be), drinking my water. that's my goal for today, and it'll be my goal for tomorrow too.

making goals simple and daily (albeit repetitive) means that i'm only focusing on the now. i'm not trying to lose 30lbs by christmas, or fit into a specific outfit for a specific day. it's just about focusing on what i'm doing right this second.

if i don't meet that goal for whatever reason, then it's ok. it means i try twice as hard to meet my goal for tomorrow. but the nice thing is that by concentrating on what i'm doing today, i'm not overwhelmed by trying to stick to something FOR. EV. ER. after a while, i can look back and realize that i've been sticking to my goal for a month, or two, or 6.

So, please help!! Tell me how you managed and give me any tips you have.

one day at a time. seriously. i have one goal to meet each day... stay on plan. that means eating my macros, getting to the gym and doing my workout for that day (whatever it happens to be), drinking my water. that's my goal for today, and it'll be my goal for tomorrow too.

making goals simple and daily (albeit repetitive) means that i'm only focusing on the now. i'm not trying to lose 30lbs by christmas, or fit into a specific outfit for a specific day. it's just about focusing on what i'm doing right this second.

^^This, although I did have an ambitious weight loss target even though it wasn't time-limited. After a while a habit becomes so ingrained that you forget what you did before and then it's a lifestyle change, but I think it still needs eternal vigilance.

Oh and don't kick yourself for past might-have-beens, or what-I-did-last-years. Remember you're only human. Focus on today, it's a lot easier to manage.

How do you make it a lifestyle change?

One bad habit at a time...

It is unrealistic and unreasonable to assume wholesale change overnight...but this is what most people try to do. Most people also seem to forget the "life" part of "lifestyle"...betterment of one's self is a life long endeavor...you're really never done. This is why, in my estimation, you have to get out of the mindset of "starting over" or whatever when you fall...you just continue on your path..no need to start over.

You have to understand that your path is going to have many twists and turns and ups and downs and bumps and pitfalls..you have to get out of the mindset that you're going to be 100% perfect all of the time...you're not...you're going to have good days and bad days and good weeks and bad weeks...hell, I have whole months that go into the ****ter because life happens. But you get yourself back up and continue on.

I would also suggest sitting down and doing some real research on proper nutrition as well. So many people seem to think that to be "healthy" food can't taste good...I'm a foodie...all of my food tastes good and most of it is pretty healthy. Also, contrary to popular belief you don't have to live on salads and celery sticks...when it comes to matters of nutrition, context and dosage are very important. There is no reason that you can't, for example, have some pizza or a burger or whatever within the context of a well balanced and varied diet. Your food doesn't have to taste like cardboard.

Baby steps. Start with one thing... the next day (or even two or three later) do something else. Don't let the excuses get to you. Be intentional until it because natural and intuitive.

work out a schedule... you have al sorts of commitments.. mostly to your children... BUT you need to make some commitments to yourself... you take time to eat.. time to watch TV??? THEN YOU should not have a problem making time to commit to an exercise plan for yourself.. the BIGGEST change you need to make... is to begin thinking of food as fuel...and paying strict attention to your macros... I was recently (within the last 2 weeks) diagnosed with type II Diabetes... BOTH my parents developed type II... and at the moment I am suffering through some major loss of eyesight... a month ago I could see perfectly fine... NOW I am wearing 2.5 x magnifying reading glasses just to see my computer monitor... on 2 pills... and have eliminated as much sugar from my diet as I possibly can... THIS even after deciding to make lifestyle changes myself more than 2 years ago... of course you never think that a soda pop once in a while isn't going to hurt... or that you'll have time to make up for the exercise you're not doing today... tomorrow...

and now my biggest challenge is trying to convince my teenage daughter that she should start making the changes I should have made the day she was born... because she now thinks the odd soda pop isn't going to hurt either... AM I too late to set an example for her??? I Hope not...

You make it a habit so it feels natural. That goes for food choices, activity level, getting used to feeling satisfied but not totally full after eating, etc...

My diet and routines all feel very natural to me. I eat foods I enjoy that are also healthy and stay active and exercise because that also makes me feel good about myself. When I do eat out or overdo it, I'm back to my regular diet and routine the next day, so it's no big deal.

The only time I do feel a little strange is when I go grocery shopping and it seems that 90% or more of what most people have in their carts is stuff I simply don't buy or eat. I buy a lot of fresh produce, naturally raised meats, cage free eggs, and very basic food stapless, and although it seems like that would cost more, my total is always a fraction of what the people in front of me end up paying with a cart full of soft drinks, cereal, snacks, and convenience foods.

Here's a tip that will only work for someone as OCD as I am: Get over-organized. With your hectic schedule, it might make things easier in the long run.

I plan 7 days of meals (breakfast, lunch, and dinner, including planned fast food type stuff) on Saturday morning, buy my groceries that afternoon, and just cross out the planned meal after I fix it. I also have a workout calendar. I downloaded one of those free Microsoft calendars to print each month, and I plan what I'll do on what day. It's typed on the calendar in INK; I have no choice whether to work out or not. Some days, I'm so busy with kids' stuff that I don't end up working out until 9:00 pm. Sometimes, I have to make up a workout on a planned day off, but... It's on the calendar, so it has to be done. Did I mention I was OCD?

Fast food tips, because sometimes you've got to eat on the run: Little Caesar's makes the best wings (560 or 580 calories for plain wings; less than 600, anyway) of all the pizza places, for only $6. McDonald's makes awesome grilled chicken salads (Bacon Ranch with Low Fat Italian) for about 300 calories. I'm not sure about the calorie count for Chik-fil-a's grilled chicken salads, but I'm sure it's pretty similar. Fresco tacos at Taco Bell are all in the 150 calorie range. Just explore the online menu of your favorite places, so you've got a plan in place for those nights you've got to grab something on the run.

I agree with everything that @chadya07 said about attitude. I have also found that it is a LOT easier this time as I am also doing a few things that help me to be more successful.

1. Find an activity you love, your "exercise" should be based primarily around things you like to do as an incentive to doing them. For me this is hiking on mountain trails. All my strength training, HIIT training, etc. are mere appendages to my hikes and are completed with the goal of allowing me to hike further in less time.
2. Break bad habits with good ones. For example, perhaps you have a habit of grabbing a donut at work for breakfast because for some reason your office provides them every day. Some good habits that would overcome this challenge would be to prepare your breakfast the night before, have easy to prepare breakfast items ready to grab, waking up 20 minutes early to give more time for breakfast before arriving at work. All of the habits have the same overall goal of allowing you to arrive at work satiated instead of starving.
3. To make good habits start with small changes. For example, instead of trying to cut out soda all at once you could try cutting down from a 6 pack of soda to 5 cans of soda per day. Once you have only drunk 5 cans a day for a couple of weeks then drop down to 4 cans, etc.
4. Log accurately and often. Preferably log a meal or snack before you eat it.
5. Life is like a game. Think of each success as leveling up and each setback as temporary.

we have been in your shoes. The kids should be your inspiration. You can get moving by walking, running, aroebics, yogo whatever. Keep looking for that workout buddy. But just remember -- it's up to you. You are a special person and can accomplish anything you set your mind to.

I agree with everything that @chadya07 said about attitude. I have also found that it is a LOT easier this time as I am also doing a few things that help me to be more successful.

1. Find an activity you love, your "exercise" should be based primarily around things you like to do as an incentive to doing them. For me this is hiking on mountain trails. All my strength training, HIIT training, etc. are mere appendages to my hikes and are completed with the goal of allowing me to hike further in less time.
2. Break bad habits with good ones. For example, perhaps you have a habit of grabbing a donut at work for breakfast because for some reason your office provides them every day. Some good habits that would overcome this challenge would be to prepare your breakfast the night before, have easy to prepare breakfast items ready to grab, waking up 20 minutes early to give more time for breakfast before arriving at work. All of the habits have the same overall goal of allowing you to arrive at work satiated instead of starving.
3. To make good habits start with small changes. For example, instead of trying to cut out soda all at once you could try cutting down from a 6 pack of soda to 5 cans of soda per day. Once you have only drunk 5 cans a day for a couple of weeks then drop down to 4 cans, etc.
4. Log accurately and often. Preferably log a meal or snack before you eat it.
5. Life is like a game. Think of each success as leveling up and each setback as temporary.

THIS! Everything about this.

Double cosign the pre-prepared food stuff. It really helps me escape the trap of the breakfast pastry. #3 incremental changes are where its at. Plus it gives you little victories to feel good about when you're plateauing.


Also:

The best advice I ever heard was "forgive yourself." You said in your OP something to the tune of "I'm unsuccessful at keeping up diets." You know what? Its okay when you fall off of the wagon! Forgive yourself, move on, get back on the wagon! Everyday you eat well is another day you got healthier.

Well said