I'm Of Control-I Just Purged My Dinner Up From Guilt

I can't give you the answers, but I do have experience in this area. For at least 15 years of my life i consistantly purged the food I ate. I wasn't a binger as much as a purger. Now I am paying the price. I have worn out the enamel on the back of my top and bottom teeth, I am having throat problems as well. It was not easy to stop, but I can say that I haven't purged in about a year. I am forty, I know better, but the control is the hardest part to overcome. No matter how much better you feel afterwards (and I know), it is not worth what you will do to your body.

Just know that we are not perfect. We will have off days. Stay strong today, for a better self tomorrow. I'll be thinking about you.

Oh my gosh.. this worried me. Please don't make purging a habit. That will send you on a path that can be severely damaging. Major health problems. Tooth decay from all the acid. Count today as an "oops" day, and move on. I have only been doing this for about 1 1/2 weeks, and being OCD, I also panic when I don't have the nutritional information to put in. Every day can't be perfect. Just do your best. Make up for it tomorrow. Remind your husband that even though you go on vacation, you still want to stick to your healthy eating. When you go to a restaurant, ask for a nutrition guide. Most places have them. If you know ahead of time where you might be eating, try to pull the info up online, and make plans. Try to plan meals ahead so that there is no panic. If there is no info available, just try to order sensibly. Don't deprive yourself.. if there is something you really want, have it. Just have a small portion. If I deprive myself of something, it just makes me want it more, then I eat too much of it. I wish you the best of luck!

I've always heard that the salads when you eat out may be even more calories than an actual dinner plate. I'm ALWAYS starving an hour after eating a salad anyways. Seems like you need to choose foods that help you feel satisfied. I usually do the high fiber foods...just google and you can pick ones you'd like. If you know you're going out to eat def. make sure you fit in a great workout so you know that whatever you eat after won't effect you as much. For the vaca you and your hubby can go on walks together everyday morning/night. It would be romantic. Even if you don't get your heart rate up, you're moving...or even swim some laps in a pool...great workout!

As far as the bulimia, I would stop now before you make it a habit. It's not good for your body. All the acidic juices in your stomach are being expelled into your esophagus eating at it. You'll end up with ulcers and even worse complications to your health...just google it and do a little research, I bet you'll never do it again. It's not worth your health. Hope this helped and please take care of yourself! :flowerforyou:

I don't think you need to be ashamed, but I do think it's important to get help. A forum can offer you support, but we can't help you resolve these issues. I'm sorry that you're going through a difficult time right now, and I hope you are able to find a good therapist or someone else who can help you work through this.

my thought is, don't beat yourself up over eating out. it sounded like you had a pretty good meal, and a nice treat, which you still made sure to choose no sugar and low fat. when eating out, you can always ask about ingredients, and ask them to leave certain things out, or in the case of sauces, have them on the side. this way you can control how much of it you use. there is nothing that says you need to eat everything on your plate either.

your vacation next week, are you going away? so that you will be eating out for every meal? you can always plan breakfasts in your hotel room, as most hotel rooms have at least a mini bar. keep a box of cereal, some fruit and soymilk. there are ways to make it easier on yourself also keep veggies in it, and each day take a baggie of them with you as you go out and do your vacationy things, then when you do go to eat meals, you won't be as hungry.

it sounds like you just need to take a few deep breaths, and think about why you are trying to eat healthy. remind yourself that all the good stuff you are doing for your body right now would mean nothing if you started purging. no amount of weight lose is worth what that can do to your body. true, overindulging when going out can throw your plan right out the window, but with how worried you are about it, i think you will do fine. also, make more informed choices on where you go to eat out. if your husband wants to go somewhere where you know it will be hard for you to find something that will fit into your plan, well, give him a little poke! those skinny men who can eat whatever they want never understand, but if you tell him about your fears, i am sure he will be more than happy to stick with places that will have many more choices for you.

eating out is not the enemy, really it isn't. it sure isn't as easy for those of use watching what we eat, but it is doable. with just a little planning, you should be able to not only eat fine on your vacation, but enjoy yourself as well, otherwise what's the point of a vacation right? lol

heya, saw a friend of mine posted on this, and I would say don't worry about being exact if you eat out and they don't have the exact thing. The database is amazing, I looked up couscous after reading your post and there is a couscous salad listed. I eat out and have not found anything I have eaten out that is not in the database already. or close enough, tonight I ate a thin crust little caesars pizza, had ham and pinepple on it, well found a ham and cheese little caesars thin crust in the database. put that in know I am a few calories over due t the pinaeapple, but gives me an idea of what I have eaten. But what I wanted to remind you is there are Droid and Iphone apps for this. and if you don't have either of those but have a webbrowser on your phone can access the site directly, Whip outyour phone and calculate what you ate. and I don't know you or your husband, but seems to me if a husband was embarressed by how you look he would not take you out in the first place *S*. but no more puking mkay?

if you feel overwhelmed and are not sure how to actually get over this constant cycle of fear or binge/purging i recommend reading a book by Kathryn Hansen called "Brain over Binge"... it gave me a totally different perspective on my disorderly eating.. best wishes!