Something I do not like about MFP

elizabethl27
elizabethl27 Posts: 52 Member
edited September 23 in Health and Weight Loss
Everything about this site is great...there is just one complaint I have and it has to do with unrealistic weight goals.

When I see a girl on MFP who is 5'6" and her goal weight is 100 pounds, that freaks me out a little bit. Now, I understand that BMI is not entirely accurate, but it can be used a general guideline for health. I also understand that everybody's body is different, and we all look different with different weights. I am 5'2" and my goal weight is 115. According to my BMI, girls at my height can weigh anyway from 100 pounds to 136 pounds (give or take) in order to be considered in the healthy range. So, somebody at my height can weigh 100 pounds and look perfectly healthy, or 125 and still be considered in the healthy weight range. Considering this, a person who is 5'6" and wants to weigh 100 pounds just seems very unhealthy to me!

I know what your thinking. It is none of my business and I should not be judging others goals. That is true to an extent, but most of these goals are exposed openly on here. It is hard not to miss them.

I believe this site is about establishing healthy boundaries. Most people on this site do have these healthy boundaries. I often see many of you write, "In the end, it doesn't matter what the number on the scale says as long as I am healthy and feel good about myself." That is great! I love when I read that. Being overweight is unhealthy, but we should also emphasize how being underweight is unhealthy, too. An article on Web Md says:

"Those who are extremely lean tend to have weaker immune systems, making them prone to infections, surgical complications, and slower recovery times for illness. They tend to have low muscle mass, and less than ideal hair, teeth, and skin composition. They may have disruptions in the ability to regulate hormones and protect bone health, and women could become unable to menstruate."

I worry about girls on here (and even boys too) and unrealistic beauty standards in society. Even I fall into these traps and I believe that when one chooses an unhealthy goal weight on here, maybe the site should say "Would you like to reevaluate your goals? This seems to be an unhealthy goal."

So, I am just venting and I do not know if I am crazy or any of this makes sense. I strongly support everybody's mission on here to get healthy, but we should not forget that you can be too thin and that being too thin can be unhealthy! This is my first time posting here...
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Replies

  • scagneti
    scagneti Posts: 707 Member
    I completely understand and I agree with you. It makes me so sad to know that these girls have these completely unrealistic goals that they will likely never be able to achieve. My hope is that they learn from MFP that those goals are unrealistic and that with toning exercises and good healthy eating habits that will be with them forever, they'll be happy as a healthy 120 lber instead of a starving and miserable 100lber.
  • yanicka
    yanicka Posts: 1,004 Member
    totally agree.
  • Amandac6772
    Amandac6772 Posts: 1,311 Member
    **AGREE**
  • elizabethl27
    elizabethl27 Posts: 52 Member
    Thank you ladies. Lately I have I have just been seeing so many unrealistic goals, and it has just been bugging me! I had to write something. haha.
  • Just_Dot
    Just_Dot Posts: 2,283 Member
    Well said!
  • mommyskis
    mommyskis Posts: 277 Member
    Great post - agreed.
  • amycal
    amycal Posts: 646 Member
    YIKES I haven't seen that yet but that is scary and very unrealistic. My 16 yo dd is 5'6" and 117 which I think is too skinny - I keep telling her she better NOT get any thinner. Fortunately she is very fit and has beautiful muscles but her abdomen is soooo tiny. She is also strong. If she loses more she could blow away!
  • katbass
    katbass Posts: 351 Member
    Totally agree! I also notice the signatures that have "Mini goals" of losing 20 lbs in one month. I know some people have significant (100+) weight to lose, but setting a goal of losing 20 lbs a month for the next 4 or 5 months is just not healthy or realistic. I hate to see people set themselves up for failure or disappointment. Of course, Id looove to see them attain that goal, but I also know the side effects of losing too fast....so its hard to cheer on that goal whole-heartedly.

    Thanks for posting this and letting me know Im not alone! haha
  • Jessicat9
    Jessicat9 Posts: 9 Member
    Agree, if you're going to loose weight it should be so that you become more healthy, once you slip the otherside of your target BMI you're no longer loosing weight to become healthy. Your just loosing your health.
    Definitely think that MFP should prevent you putting in dangerous goals!
  • marniehodges
    marniehodges Posts: 264
    I agree!!! When I was in high school I weighed 115-120, and I'm 5'8"! I never had to diet (I ate like a fiend) but I was really active and played a lot of sports. Looking back at picture of myself then I'm apalled...I looked like a bony stick! Yuk! Even though it wasn't on purpose back then, I would never want to be that thin again. I'm a woman and I want to keep some of my curves :bigsmile: ! Good post...now I just hope some of the right people read it! :drinker:
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    Totally agree. And I hope seeing the success stories, they'll see what healthy, beautiful women really weigh.

    I blame the media... Playboy Playmates, for instance. They rarely admit to weighing over 110 pounds. Somehow, though, their super tall frames have full and soft curves, yet at 5'5 and 110 pounds, I was a stick figure.
  • neelia
    neelia Posts: 750 Member
    Well said and I totally agree. =)
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
    im 5'6 and going for 140 it seems to be a nice inbetween number for where i shoulkd be.
  • That_Girl
    That_Girl Posts: 1,324 Member
    I am 5'6" and was once 100 pounds (many years ago).

    I didn't get there in a healthy way.

    I don't really think about others' goals though. They know right from wrong.
  • Kalee34
    Kalee34 Posts: 674 Member
    RIGHT ON!!!!
  • parakeet
    parakeet Posts: 28 Member
    I understand and agree!
  • rockabyesarojane
    rockabyesarojane Posts: 471
    bump! so agree!
  • elizabethl27
    elizabethl27 Posts: 52 Member
    i'm glad i'm not alone!
  • JillyBean819
    JillyBean819 Posts: 313 Member
    It's crazy that this site even allows someone to set a goal so low. Very scary.
  • ukredhead19
    ukredhead19 Posts: 176
    I agree. I felt the same way the other day when I saw a ticker that the goal weight was to be 96lbs (not lose 96...actually weigh 96)!!!! It's obsessive behavior, and I've been around people who suffer from eating disorders and it is a miserable existence...because even at 96lbs they won't be happy. The focus should be on healthy lifestyles (NOT CRASH DIETING!).
  • elizabethl27
    elizabethl27 Posts: 52 Member
    Yes definitely! To me it is the beginning of an eating disorder in many cases.
  • ItsMissMuffy
    ItsMissMuffy Posts: 27 Member
    Bump!

    I agree, I have seen a feel girls on here who are already WAY below what they should be to be healthy and STILL trying to loose weight.
    However at the same time I can't judge there goals, if it makes them feel good and be happy then so be it, but sometimes I wish I could step in or some one would.

    <3Muffin
  • ItsMissMuffy
    ItsMissMuffy Posts: 27 Member
    Bump!

    I agree, I have seen a feel girls on here who are already WAY below what they should be to be healthy and STILL trying to loose weight.
    However at the same time I can't judge there goals, if it makes them feel good and be happy then so be it, but sometimes I wish I could step in or some one would.

    <3Muffin
  • ItsMissMuffy
    ItsMissMuffy Posts: 27 Member
    Bump!

    I agree, I have seen a feel girls on here who are already WAY below what they should be to be healthy and STILL trying to loose weight.
    However at the same time I can't judge there goals, if it makes them feel good and be happy then so be it, but sometimes I wish I could step in or some one would.

    <3Muffin
  • ItsMissMuffy
    ItsMissMuffy Posts: 27 Member
    Bump!

    I agree, I have seen a feel girls on here who are already WAY below what they should be to be healthy and STILL trying to loose weight.
    However at the same time I can't judge there goals, if it makes them feel good and be happy then so be it, but sometimes I wish I could step in or some one would.

    <3Muffin
  • ItsMissMuffy
    ItsMissMuffy Posts: 27 Member
    Bump!

    I agree, I have seen a feel girls on here who are already WAY below what they should be to be healthy and STILL trying to loose weight.
    However at the same time I can't judge there goals, if it makes them feel good and be happy then so be it, but sometimes I wish I could step in or some one would.

    <3Muffin
  • ItsMissMuffy
    ItsMissMuffy Posts: 27 Member
    WOAH! Sorry about that, I don't know what happened there!

    :-((
  • mariasheehan
    mariasheehan Posts: 335
    *agree*
  • Ding724
    Ding724 Posts: 791 Member
    I definitely agree with you...as much as I LOVE MFP, some people's goal weights have made me question my own at times.

    I am a tall girl [a bit over 5'9] and my original goal was 170 with a healthy BMI, but then I felt like that number was too big compared to other MFP ladies...so I changed my goal to a BMI of 23 & weight of 155. I am very athletic and know that my body won't look great any lower than that, but I've actually had other tall girls tell me that I could "lose alot more" or that I'd look "super hot" if I weighed 130! It's hard sometimes to stick to what I know about my body and not just want to be skinnnnnny. Thanks for posting this. It makes me feel a bit more secure in my goals :flowerforyou:
  • kaylamae90
    kaylamae90 Posts: 26
    I definitely agree with you...as much as I LOVE MFP, some people's goal weights have made me question my own at times.

    I am a tall girl [a bit over 5'9] and my original goal was 170 with a healthy BMI, but then I felt like that number was too big compared to other MFP ladies...so I changed my goal to a BMI of 23 & weight of 155. I am very athletic and know that my body won't look great any lower than that, but I've actually had other tall girls tell me that I could "lose alot more" or that I'd look "super hot" if I weighed 130! It's hard sometimes to stick to what I know about my body and not just want to be skinnnnnny. Thanks for posting this. It makes me feel a bit more secure in my goals :flowerforyou:

    I am 5'6" and I am aiming at 150... I am built pretty ahletically too so I understand what you mean when people don't think that you should "settle" for that goal. My low end of the BMI chart said I could go to 120something and that is completely unrealistic. As long as you feel good with what you look like thats all that matters! I know with my body build if I want to keep some of the lady lumps and not look like a boy will have to stay at the upper end of the range. I'm ok with that. Plus if you are athletic you know muscle weighs more than fat and you'll be able to whoop any of the ones shooting for ridiculous low goals in any sport! lol :)
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