Fear of Dying

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  • jlwhelan1
    jlwhelan1 Posts: 664
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    I love this book, Growing Old is not for Sissies. Here are some great pictures.
    http://ettaclarkphotography.com/
  • AJCM
    AJCM Posts: 2,169 Member
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    Interesting...

    My fear of death has nothing to do with the act of dying itself, but of ceasing to exist...
    :ohwell:

    Cease to exist? Not me!

    In this current state and situation...
    :flowerforyou:
  • jlwhelan1
    jlwhelan1 Posts: 664
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    30 was, by far, the most difficult birthday of my life. I realized that there were some things physically, that I could never do as well again. My funk lasted a few years. But it passed, and life got better. When I turned 40 it was no big thing. In fact, I started my own business at 46. That same year I became a father for the 3rd time. 50 was a piece of cake. So was 60. 62 was a little rough as I was given a month to a year to live. I'm 66 now and plan on confounding the doctors for years to come. My baby girl graduates from college next may and I'll be there. She just got engaged and will be married in two more years. I'll be there to walk her down the aisle. Stay healthy with proper diet and execise; smile often; love deeply; and always have a dream. You've got a great life to look forward to and it's just about to begin!

    What a beautiful message to Ellelit and all of us!
    :flowerforyou:

    Very special, indeed. Thank you.
  • blueenvy
    blueenvy Posts: 31 Member
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    I freaked out when I saw a picture of me blowing out a birthday sundae for my 32 B-Day. That's when I started realizing that a huge part my life is over. I think we are kinda programmed to think that way. lol Actually this is the happiest I've been in a long A** time. I'm working out three times a week I've lost several pounds (before I joined this site) and I intend on losing the rest with MFP if not by my 33rd B-day then at least by my 34. Life is never over unless you give up on it.

    90571.png
    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Diet Journal
  • greysweatshirt
    greysweatshirt Posts: 411
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    My birthday is a couple weeks from now too (the 22nd!) and I'll be turning 29..I'm sad it's my last birthday in my 20's! I feel over the hill already!! Ugh!
  • OomarianneoO
    OomarianneoO Posts: 689 Member
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    My birthday is a couple weeks from now too (the 22nd!) and I'll be turning 29..I'm sad it's my last birthday in my 20's! I feel over the hill already!! Ugh!

    Watch it there, mister! If you're over the hill, then I'm rolling down in some kind of somersault and I can't stop. shocked001.jpg1100.gif
  • lessertess
    lessertess Posts: 855 Member
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    First of all, focusing on death is no way to live.

    Secondly, 30 is just a number. I turned 46 in May and am now closer to 50 than I am 40. But thanks to my lifestyle change I'm in better shape, healthier, have more energy and happier than I was in my 20's. In fact there are lots of 20 year olds that aren't as "young" as I am today. My yoga instructor is in her early 50's and she has the body of a healthy 20 year old.

    I started this lifestyle change becasue I was worried, not about dying but about being old and helpless and a slave to an unhealthy body. They way I was going, it was a reality that I wasn't going to escape. Compared to that, death is nothing to fear.

    I don't want to live forever. But, I very much want to be healthy and independent until I die. Pictures of me confined to a wheelchair in an elderly care facility are much scarier than those of me dying while hiking over a mountain.

    Live Strong!
  • TNTPete
    TNTPete Posts: 701 Member
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    You will continue to grow and change -- if your fear becomes less probably depends on what your faith/value/belief system is. I think as you get older you also gain wisdom and insight hence, the decrease in dying fears.

    Live for today, plan for tomorrow and laugh. Don't take people for granted and do what ever you can to make the world a better place. Focusing on the life itself is not important -- focus on the impact you can make with your life. Make sense?

    Oh and I am much better now at 33 then I was at 23!! I am stronger physically, mentally and emotionally. Wouldn't have my 20's back for the world -- looking forward to what tomorrow brings!!

    BTW -- you are on your way to losing, don't let an arbitrary number set you back!!
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
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    I can't wait to turn 55 in November because I found out I can get a discount at the gym. Also I can move into a 55 plus community. :bigsmile:
  • jlwhelan1
    jlwhelan1 Posts: 664
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    I can't wait to turn 55 in November because I found out I can get a discount at the gym. Also I can move into a 55 plus community. :bigsmile:

    My dad got carded at 55:laugh:
    I think the store clerk didn't look up before he asked because my although my father looks good, he had grey hair. But the clerk held firm and demanded to see his ID.:laugh:

    I wish I'd witnessed that.
  • Katy009
    Katy009 Posts: 579 Member
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    I went through a period like that, too, where I thought constantly about dying because I smoked so much. Everytime I lit a cigarette I would start to imagine dying of lung cancer and how I would suffer and how miserable I would be. My eventual goal was to quit at age 30. Well, I didn't do it. But I also didn't give up. I finally managed to quit six years later. Not only did I imagine myself dying of lung cancer, but my daughter having to watch it. I turned 37 YESTERDAY and I have been smoke-free for a little over a year. Thoughts about dying still cross my mind because now I'm afraid of leaving my daughter without a mother......

    My only trick is to really.....REALLY.....focus on what you have going for you NOW. I think that eventually it will lessen once you refocus on something else. But right now you are really trying to change your life and of course, death is going to be floating around in your mind, too.

    As far as turning 30....I wouldn't go back to my 20s for anything. Life always brings new challenges and each year only gets better! Once you turn 31, those thoughts will be completely vanished!

    :heart: Katy
  • pecksun8
    pecksun8 Posts: 570
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    30 for me wasn't a big deal, which I guess was a little surprising. But for some reason 33 was a little bit harder and I don't know why but it hit me pretty hard. And well I don't have a fear of dying, it's how I die that can worry me sometimes. I really don't want to be brutally murdered or shot by some punk kid, mainly because I don't want that punk kid to live a life like that, and sheer brutality is a reaction to not being able to fit your square life in a round peg hole, and trying your whole life to fit into it, then what do we expect to happen. It's so senseless.

    I don't have a fear of dying because I have a small partial inclination of what it's like, and I have to tell you, it was the most peaceful, quiet, fearless, and serene sense that I have ever felt in my life.
    I don't know what it's like to have a real disease like cancer, or kidney failure or anything else like that where people want to fight and live. I have a mental illness, which seems like such a cop-out, such a joke of a problem, because it's all in my head. It's something that I have to deal with on a daily basis and there are some days where I still feel the pull downward and think to myself why bother? And I have to tell you, a lot of the time I can't come up with a very good reason. But for some reason I am still here and I don't know why.
  • calatibo
    calatibo Posts: 289 Member
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    My friends fear me dying more than i do, they know i have them all listed to do karaoke songs at my funeral.

    :laugh:

    meh, i'm 29 in November, not achieved a great deal in life (yet) but to be honest i really could not care much about how old i am. The only issues i have with age is losing my facilties, and i doubt that will happen (more) before i "pop myclogs" in a freak sport related accident.
  • heartshapdworld
    heartshapdworld Posts: 323 Member
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    I can't wait to turn 55 in November because I found out I can get a discount at the gym. Also I can move into a 55 plus community. :bigsmile:

    That reminds me of my mom and uncle-they were hella exicted to receive their Senior Discounts! Have you ever noticed that more mature people begin to start things with, "I am 85 years old..." My grandma loves telling people her age-she an active person. She will only date younger men-she tells me no old men for her! :laugh:

    I want that spunk at 85!
  • johnD
    johnD Posts: 14
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    I had tripple bypass surgery the week before i turned 40. I thought I was scared, and then 1 month after the surgery, one of the graphs failed and I had a small heart attack, THEN i got scared, and depressed. Everytime a felt any pain at all, I thought I was going to fall over dead. 14 cardiac caths, 9 angioplasties, and 5 stints later do I still think about dieing? Sometimes, but not as much as you might think.

    You learn to focus on the good parts of life. How happy your are about things you used to take for granted. You care more about how you live every day and less about when you might die.

    We will all die, there's no question of that. The question is how many of us will really live!?
    Getting and staying healthy is a good place to start.
  • kleimola
    kleimola Posts: 210 Member
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    30 was my best birthday ever. I had just had my first child one month previously, I have a nice home, a loving husband and a good job. I couldn't ask for anything more! Yes I am overweight but that was okay, I just had a baby and now I am working on that. The only time I was truley afraid to die was two months after my daughter was born i had surgery and I was afraid I wouldn't wake up and ever see my daughter again. Other than that 30 was great. You will be just fine, know that you are doing good for yourself now and that is what is important.
  • kleimola
    kleimola Posts: 210 Member
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    I can't wait to turn 55 in November because I found out I can get a discount at the gym. Also I can move into a 55 plus community. :bigsmile:

    My dad got carded at 55:laugh:
    I think the store clerk didn't look up before he asked because my although my father looks good, he had grey hair. But the clerk held firm and demanded to see his ID.:laugh:

    I wish I'd witnessed that.

    Hey I was born with grey hair (that is my birthmark) and I am 31 and I still get carded.

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