Feeling Lonely

lindalee0315
lindalee0315 Posts: 527 Member
edited September 24 in Introduce Yourself
I am feeling so alone right now, and that's not really fair. I think it's because my son is turning three, and I'm thinking about how my dad will miss him growing up. (I posted about my dad in a blog, "The Tale of the Three Red Birds." ) My dad died on May 13. When does it stop hurting quite so much?

Replies

  • MsFitnFabulous
    MsFitnFabulous Posts: 432 Member
    :flowerforyou: I feel your pain but in a different way. My dad died when I was just 15, a high school freshman. There are a lot of things that my dad won't get to see in the physical body. I just know that he's in heaven watching over me. I'm sure he's cried a river of tears of my pitfalls and success. It's ok to miss him, and you can tell your son all about him so he'll know what a great man raised you.
  • Goal_Seeker_1988
    Goal_Seeker_1988 Posts: 1,619 Member
    Sorry for your loss. I am sure that your pain that you are having never goes away. I wish I could say more to help.
  • ♥Faerie♥
    ♥Faerie♥ Posts: 14,053 Member
    It doesn't, but it does get better, and over time when you remember him you will do it with a smile for the times you had and not a frown for the loss.....
    Be strong♥
  • kms1981
    kms1981 Posts: 207 Member
    My mom passed 08/08/10. I have no idea when the pain and hurt goes away. It is so hard to not only miss them for yourself but for your children. Not having a Nana around to watch them grow up and teach them things is such a hard thing to come to terms with. I feel your pain and know that you are not alone in this process!
  • Rubie81
    Rubie81 Posts: 720 Member
    Awe, honey. Sending you a cyber hug.
  • soccermom004
    soccermom004 Posts: 444 Member
    You can see your Dad in your son. I know it's hard and you'll never stop missing him but he is always with you. Enjoy your time with your son.
  • ColeyCannoli
    ColeyCannoli Posts: 147
    I understand a little of how you are feeling. My dad died when I was 19 and, like the girl above said, I realize that he is now my angel. All I can say is to let yourself feel the pain: cry, scream, etc. and one day you will wake up and it will feel a little lighter. It took me a year or more to really be able to stop thinking about it all the time. Just give yourself that time to grieve and don't be hard on yourself for feeling bad. Many prayers <3
  • emlov81
    emlov81 Posts: 128
    It doesn't, but it does get better, and over time when you remember him you will do it with a smile for the times you had and not a frown for the loss.....
    Be strong♥

    Tried to think of something comforting to say, think this says it nicely :cry:
  • hkittymommy
    hkittymommy Posts: 5 Member
    I am truly sorry for your loss. My brother died in June 2010 and it is still very hard; I vacillate between disbelief and utter shock that he is gone. I think about him a lot when I'm working out (running on the treadmill or outside). I am sorry that my words are not quite consoling; just wanted to say (sadly) that you are not alone, there are others of us on here who are dearly missing departed loved ones. Sending you (virtually) a big hug.
  • Ashley_Panda
    Ashley_Panda Posts: 1,404 Member
    My father is alive but chooses not to be in our life. My son is 15 months old. However my brother died when I was 17, right before the start of my senior year of high school. I know that my brother would adore my son. Just as he did our nephew from our oldest brother. Your dad is there. He's not missing a thing, baby. Just like my brother isn't. And he is damn proud of you.
  • mowrynation
    mowrynation Posts: 91
    I am sorry to hear of your loss. It isn't easy, but when you surround yourself with positive people it can help. I lost my Mom just over 8 years ago. It still is hard sometimes, but I know that she is smiling down on me and has her hand in my life from what she taught me. I find myself remembering things that she did throughout my day. You have your son which is so joyous!!! Be there for him the way that your Dad was for you.. and in a way he will be there too. I didn't read your blog yet, but will.
  • joshiesdad
    joshiesdad Posts: 80
    I know exactly how you feel. My dad passed when I was 13. So my dad missed more of my life than he got to be a part of. He will miss every part of my son's life. I miss him every day. The pain will eventually fade. There will always be a space in your heart that feels empty. you just have to Share all of the memories that you have with your son. The pain will fade but the memories will last a life time. My father passing when he was just 34 is the reason I am on here. I want to be here for all of the little things my father missed.
  • fitnesspirateninja
    fitnesspirateninja Posts: 667 Member
    Milestones and holidays are hard because you really notice that the person isn't there. I remember feeling really sad that my grandpa wouldn't be at my wedding, and wouldn't be there to dance with me. I carried a small picture of him in a locket on my bouquet.

    I know that it's not the same kind of situation, but is there something you can do to remember your dad on your son's birthday, like light a candle next to a photo of your dad?
  • Dtho5159
    Dtho5159 Posts: 1,054 Member
    Its hard!! I won't lie to you.. Some people handle it better than others. My mom lost her dad in 2000 and I lost mine in 2001. My grandfather had cancer for just over 2 years and my dad died very suddenly. They passed 1 week short of a year apart. My mom had handled it very well. Me, not so much. I was 17 when my dad passed and it was the worst day of my life. This September will be a full decade and I can't even look at a picture of him without breaking down. It may be easier for some, but for me, it still hurts as much today as it did then.
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