What is wrong with me??

I know this isn't what you want to hear, but you have to find the motivation within yourself that pushes you to change. We all have our own breaking point. Mine was the breakup of a relationship - I sat back and realized I was NOT the person I wanted to be, in so many ways. If you want it, REALLY want it, you'll make it happen and do what you need to do. Edited to add: there's nothing anyone can do to help you hit that breaking point. Some people have to hit rock bottom, others just wake up and can change. It's up to you to decide how far/low you'll go.

Regarding your husband - if he doesn't like what you cook, he should have to cook his own meals. There's no reason for you to be making two dinners. He's a grownup and can take care of himself if he doesn't like what you offer him.

I have a lot of battles within myself about what to eat and what not to eat. If its support you are looking for, I am looking for support as well. I have a very strong sweet tooth and I have found a way to satisfy it. Maybe we can motivate each other.

Stick to it. Try something new. What you've done in the past isn't working. The best thing that I've learned from this sight is that you have to adjust your ways in order to find what works for you. For me, I eat the calories I'd need to lose 1.5 pounds/week (1360) on Monday-Friday and then on Saturday and Sunday I allow myself to eat my maintenance calories (2100). This allows me the freedom to enjoy food and cook the yummy things I want, and if I work out, I get even more! It's a lifestyle change and it's tough. Focus on the health benefits, it'll help you stick longer. And tell your man that you're not a d@mn short order cook so he can eat what you make or make his own! :flowerforyou: we're here for you

I found it very helpful to join the Y and go to their classes. The same people usually were at all the 7am classes and I loved going. If I missed a day they'd be like - where were you?! I don't have enough motivation to work out on my own every day, but if i feel like I have a deadline and somewhere to be by a certain time (ie the gym to class before it starts) I do it. I also liked an instructor telling me what i could do so I could just zone out and follow her. It was actually rather relaxing and energizing at the same time! I also got into such a routine that I fell odd mornings I did not get up to go to the gym (ie weekends). I never once slept in instead of going to the gym, and if I woke up tired I would think " you will never go to the gym and then say, man I wish I hadn't come!, but you will regret sleeping in and not going to the gym." It got me up every M/T/W/R morning. Plus, I knew I had to be there at a certain time so no, "just 10 more minutes" which turns into another hour! :laugh:

PS - I still eat junk food. I like it too much. Ice cream? Oh yeah. But on workout days I would have so many calories to play with, so I never felt deprived or like i had to cut it all out. I was totally fine with the idea of slow and steady vs cut it all out and be miserable but reach my goal in 2 months.

I agree on the hubby too. He can feed himself if he doesn't like what's on the table. You need to tell him what impression he is setting for your kids too. You say they are young enough to eat what you give them - age should not be an issue. Do not let them grow out of this.

And on the sweets, you will find other things you love too and really break out of the sweets and junk food routine (not completely, ie, see ice cream mention above!). I had kix with strawberries in it yesterday and said to my husband - this is sooo good! It's like candy! He goes "you don't have a lot of candy do you?" I thought, nope, I really don't... but I honestly would rather this bowl of fruit and cereal over a candy bar any day! It is SOOO good!

... I sat back and realized I was NOT the person I wanted to be, in so many ways. If you want it, REALLY want it, you'll make it happen and do what you need to do. Edited to add: there's nothing anyone can do to help you hit that breaking point. Some people have to hit rock bottom, others just wake up and can change. It's up to you to decide how far/low you'll go.

this = me
*nods lots*

look as a stay at home mom then i am sure there are thing you re going to have to do like it or not one of them is cooking dinner and if he is working then cooking for him is probly one of the things. that said you have to find the time and way to do what you need to do as well.. maybe that is cook your meals all in one day and save them kinda like a tv dinner. or eat welll and save the cal for dinner so you can eat what he eats. what works for me is i eat 200 cal of bad food around 1pm so i have time to burn it off.

i belive you can find a way to make it work if you want to.

i am not trying to be " it the womens job" but i belive it is not always as easy as

"Regarding your husband - if he doesn't like what you cook, he should have to cook his own meals. There's no reason for you to be making two dinners. He's a grownup and can take care of himself if he doesn't like what you offer him."

feel free to friend me if you like.

I have no idea what is wrong with me. I want to lose weight. I have all the tools at my fingertips. I have a Wii, I have Turbo Jam, Turbo Fit, ChaLean Extreme, I have a biggest loser Wii game. I know what to eat, I know how to cook it. I KNOW what to do. But I keep choosing to eat the wrong stuff. I keep choosing to not work out. I feel bad a lot of the time, and I know it's because I choose the wrong things. My problem is that I enjoy the bad food. I **love chocolate**. I love all those bad foods. Why do I keep doing this to myself? I started last year at almost 230 lbs. I got all the way down to 204, and I felt awesome. Like, super duper awesome. Then something happened and I kept putting things off. Oh, I'll workout tomorrow. Oh, I'll eat better tomorrow. Oh, today is my cheat day. Soon every day became my cheat day. I'm now back up to 213, and I hate it. My husband is not very supportive...he has no interest in losing weight even though he needs to as well. He's very picky about what he will and won't eat, so I feel like most nights I either have to make at least two different meals, or deal with him whining and complaining about how he's always so hungry. My kids are still pretty young, so they'll at least eat what I put on the table. Usually. I just don't know how to keep it going. I've tried finding online workout buddies, but no one ever sticks. They have the same issues that I do. I guess I just need someone to tell me what to do. Growing up, my mom made me do things, be active, eat well. Mostly because I didn't have a choice. Maybe now that I have the choice, I choose to do what I want as opposed to what I should do. I need help!

First off who said you have to give up chocolate??? I havent I have a chocolate biscotti or lindor truffle when ever I want it! the key is to eat it in moderations and the right kind. The biscotti is 110 calories each. the truffles are about 73 calories per ball. I think the problem here is you try hard to keep the food you love away from you when you should learn to play with it and make it work for you! I work full time the only food I make that hubby and kids eat is dinner. I make the same stuff i was making when I was "thicker" However I have worked to incorporate breakfast when I didnt eat it before and lots of water to drink this has slowed down my goody binge tremendously and I have learned to make a meal that wont eat up my calories for lunch. Play with your numbers, experiment with food instead of cutting them completely off and making yourself hate it and fall off the wagon.

You have to want it.....that's all there is to it. You have want it for you and you can do it. Make smaller goals to get started, like you will log all your calories for a week, and so on.

I eat my daily calories (1200) and my exercise calories (300-500). I have one day that I don't work out, I rest. On that day I eat my calorie level to maintain (2100)

As far as your husband goes...I have a house full of guys ..... I make a regular meal, I have a smaller portion (on a smaller plate) and a salad. They get WHAT I MAKE --- if they don't like it, they can make something themselves and sometimes they do.

Read some posts on here -- find people that inspire you and motivate you and ask them to be your buddy, explain to them why you want them to be your buddy.

You can do it! One little step at a time.

I can sooo relate.
It is hard to stick with a program when you still have the cravings for the foods you shouldn't eat. We give into the temptation because it is the path of least resistance.
I lost 66 lbs last year by making a few changes:

1) Plan your meals & snacks the night before. This one is most important
2) No substituting low calorie versions of the foods you shouldn't be eating. ex; chocolate, ice cream or no sugar syrup. Because when you substitute, the cravings remain.
3) Exercise daily - but start off slow, don't exhaust yourself.
4) Watch motivating shows such as "Heavy" on A&E.
5) Don't let yourself get hungry, That is what the snacks are for. Just make sure they are included in your calorie count.
6) Log into myfitnesspal daily

I could not control my husbands eating at all. But I did request from him not to buy any foods that would tempt me. He would buy chocolate chip ice cream, and I would be fine with it and not eat that because that is one flavor I do not like.

You might mess up by eating a few things you shouldn't though don't let it blow your next meal.
I was doing so good until my mom died, and I allowed myself to cheat here and there, a bad mistake.
I am back to eating right and exercising now, so no excuses. My mom would have wanted me to reach my goal weight.

Trust me, once you get rid of the cravings it really works.

Hi –
I don’t want to be rude to you but I deal with people that have the same issue as you do on most days. I’m a registered Holistic Nutritionist and as soon as I hear this I know deep down in my heart that my client is JUST NOT READY to start his (her) journey. You need to set your mind that this journey is for a LIFETIME. WE ALL can loose the weight, but the big thing is we just don’t try to keep it off AFTER WE REACHED OUR GOAL. We go back to our old routine and boom the weight comes on AGAIN.

When you hit rock bottom (as sad as it sounds) you will be ready to do something about it and STICK TO IT!!!

Remember Eating healthy and being active is a LIFETIME COMMITMENT.

To your health.

RHN

I'm kinda the same with my parents making me do things. It's taken years and lots of hard lessons for me to learn that discipline and self-control are requirements for me to be successful. I'm drowning in debt, too, but slowly working my way out. We naturally want to be selfish and impulsive. Buy this, eat that. The mature thing is to say no to yourself because you're a grown up and you can handle it. Babies demand their way, adults act wisely instead. I'm not giving up on this, so if you need a tough love friend, I can be that for you. You decide if you're ready to be grown up or not.

I don't know if it will help, but nothing is wrong with you. nothing. You are learning from your life, asking questions, and trying to make things better. Sounds like a great plance to be.
I just read a book that explains this feeling about thinking one thign and doing another is everywhere - the book is called "Switch". It's talking about making changes, and I thougth I was reading it for business, I've been able to apply it to myself in some marvously helpful ways that make me less likely to fight with myself (about things like eating a yummy or starting a workout as well as many many other day-to-day decisions)

Basically, having a plan is important (a diet/excercise plan), but so is setting up your life so that you don't have to fight every second to make the plan happen. - that is just emotionally exausting and no one can keep it up forever. So if you can also find the ways to setup your life/ household/ support system to make executing your plan more easy & less will-power intensive then you can make your life easier.
For example: My diet/excercise worked best when I was running every night right after I put my kid to bed (while my husband is home), then come home to a nice wark tub soak. While my kid puts on jammies- I put on my running clothes/ and as soon bedtime routine is done - before I allow myself to do anything else- I go out the frount door. That's the whole plan - I used to be how much I run but now however long I run is fine. I find that every once in awhile I run just a block and go back home. Mostly I run my 1 or 2 mile loop, and occasionally I run 3-4 miles. The plan was to excercise every day. The hard part was finding the time to run and starting the run; and so I made the hard part is part of the bedtime routine that I KNOW I will be doing; thus the starting the run becomes easier for me. It's even to the point now when my kid is encouraging me by just asking why I'm not putting my gear on when she's got jammies. AMAZING how much just that little bit of encouragment helps really keep me on track. AND I have an agreement with myself - no run, no tub soak. Encouragment to start, and a reward at the end -- it's lovely.

OR just accept that some weeks you are in a emotional/psycological place that diet/exercise is going to go well because you have the midset to make it work. And sometimes the best you are going to be able to accomplish is a slow weight gain as your mind is focused on something that's not diet/excercise.
When you don't like what's going on, then find something else to try. Try differnet routines, times, enlist help if you can - even if just for a day or two. It may take awhile, but only if you keep working at it will you find what REALLY works for you. And the only thing that will defeat you - is if you give up all together. So just keep trying. If what you were doing isn't working anymore, accept that and try something else.

People here keep pointing out that you are on this forum and thinking about your health. I hope you know that IS the right track - not the fastest track perhaps, but something that does have the potential to be helping you achieve your goal.

I have been gaining and loosing weight for 10 years. Lately it's been gain 10 loose 9, gain 5 loose 5, gain 10 loose 8, etc. Someone recently pointed out to me that was actually a pretty healthy place to be. They pointed out that weight is constantly fluxuating. Making a goal to hit a healthy weight is just that - a goal that can be hit but then it will change. YOU WILL CHANGE WEIGHT. Having the knowledge that you CAN change your weight and knowing how is the important part. So you lost some weight and felt GREAT at that time - YES & yay for you!! And now you gained some and don't feel as well, Ok that's what having a human body is like. AND So what do you want to do tonight and tomorrow??

So when you find something that works so you can stick to a diet/excercise routine then awesome! -- even if you can only do it for a day or two at a time. Then find something else that works - -- and something else that works -- and before you know it you will have a bunch of these "tools" in your toolbox. Some easier to stick to (but not as effective) and some very effective (but that can't last forever) AND you'll get to understanding which one is right for your current life situation.

Keep trying, and don't stop looking for things and finding new ways to get what you want untill you are living the life you love && that is how you make things happen. Slowly, deliberatly, continually.