Lack of support

i can totally relate to u on this one. I been trying to loose weight as well but its so difficult to do so when the father of my children doesnt take me seriously. instead of him being supportive it seems as though he tries to ruin my efforts and tempts me into eating bad food....sometime si wish he could jump on board and do this with me but he has no motivation!! what i've come to learn is to not let it influence you and just worry about u...in the long run you will feel happier

I was going to post something like this myself, only I was going to call it "couch potatoe quarterback". My hubby sits on the couch and tells me I should do my push ups this way and my sit ups that way, etc. He keeps stopping at fast food places when I am hungry. I just try to make the best choices I can. NO french fries! Take off the bun, salad, etc. I hope it works. Good luck to you!!

Its a hard thing to do, but you're going to have to figure out strategies that don't involve "doing it together" with your boyfriend. In a perfect world, you and your boyfriend would be eating the same food, working out together, and be logging on to MFP together. And maybe in time, the two of you will meet in the middle somewhere. But right now, you've decided to make a change...he hasn't. The worst thing you can is to nag him about his choices...that just creates resistance...and, isn't really being fair to him either. You didn't change until you were ready...he won't change until he is.

When I first started making healthier choices, I tried, as much as I could, to keep the "diet talk" to myself. Log into MFP when you want to talk about calories and portion sizes and nutrition and high fructose corn syrup. Because, the truth is, we *are* a little boring and obnoxious when we talk about these things obsessively! That's why we're here, so come here and obsess! Use home as practice for real life. I knew what I was suppose to eat, what I wasn't, and I didn't need to say boo about it. If you brought home brownies, I wasn't going to yell at you, or cry, or make you responsible for whether I ate them or not. You could offer them to me, and I could say, "oh, no thank you." No drama...just, no thank you. Hint: If you say no consistently enough, they will eventually stop offering. That's true at home, at the office, at your mother-in-law's...pretty much anyplace. The only reason why they keep offering is because, right now, you consistently say yes.

As another poster suggested, practice getting healthier options when you all go out to eat. I admit, its harder then it would be if you had a "weight loss buddy" as a boyfriend. But if people who have to feed small children milk and cookies can do it, so can you...its harder, but not impossible.

Make positive rather than negative suggestions. Suggest new restaurants to try, where there might be tastier, healthier options for you, as well as for him. Suggest some new activities that maybe don't include food. You'll both be having fun, doing something new, and it won't be about "your diet" but about the two of you trying new things.

But yes...its hard. All suggestions aside...its hard. But you can do it. I know you can.

I had the same problem. I struggled and struggled with getting my boyfriend to get on track with me, but it just ended up blowing up in my face. I kept telling myself that since he wouldn't change I would have to do it myself.

It's a hard thing not being able to eat with your loved one because for a lot of couples, that's the only time you have the time in this busy world to be together - during meal times.

BUT, if you really want to get to your goal then you have to separate yourself from what he eats. It sucks, but it's worth it. My boyfriend hates that we can't eat together (and so do I), but he's very proud of me for sticking with my plan.

It's tough. When my husband doesn't like his weight, he just eats one meal per day. His meal is a whole frozen pizza. It makes me ill that he can lose weight eating that much food. When I started dieting, he was always wanting ice cream and stuff. He likes me to be small and healthy but it's almost like he rubs it in my face that he doesn't have a weight problem. I do it on my own and I refuse to eat anything I haven't planned for. We do go out to eat every now and then but we've cut it down dramatically.

My husband ate 2600-3000 calories for almost 2 weeks and lost 3 lbs. I could have cried! I have been watching what I am eating for a while and he goes out and eats everything. Since we have been together I have gained over 30 lbs. So now I fix dinner and if he does not like what I fix he fixes himself something else.