Why is there so many people that try to sabotage your journe

ChantalD75
ChantalD75 Posts: 680 Member
edited September 24 in Motivation and Support
Have a work meeting tomorrow and it was understood that we are ordering in from this healthy place and now find out that they want to order in lasagna... (this from a friend that knows the hard work I am doing and she HATES it.... )... I don't want to be a party pooper but I know she is doing this because she isn't on the weight loss journey and I branched out on my own .... and she is jealous of my progress... she does this to me all the time.... I tell her I can't go out for lunch and she tells me I don't have a choice and that she will make sure that I eat well and she ends up bringing me to the grease pit in town... so I have a side salad and side dressing... and come out of there starving... and she looks at me surprised that I don't order the same as her... because that is what I used to do in the past. UUUUUURRRRGGGHHHH so tired of dealing with this... wish I can just go in a bubble and not have to deal with this!

:mad:
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Replies

  • sm26davis
    sm26davis Posts: 52
    I would just bring my lunch with me to the resturant!
  • cheangela
    cheangela Posts: 173
    If you have a bunch of crabs in an uncovered bucket, any one of them that tries to escape will be drug down by the claws of another... She's a total crab...
  • OneLostSock
    OneLostSock Posts: 82
    It's jealousy - stick at it! :smile:
  • cmel6334
    cmel6334 Posts: 41 Member
    It's ok to have some crappy food......in moderation!!
  • Ahendon824
    Ahendon824 Posts: 22 Member
    Good for you for sticking to your guns and ordering what you know is good for you! People who have not tried to lose weight or think they have tried and gave up before they even had a chance have an even harder time understanding what we are going through! It's easier for them to be jealous than to use words of encouragement! Continue to stand up for yourself! You deserve to be happy and healthy! Good luck on your journey!
  • MelissaL582
    MelissaL582 Posts: 1,422 Member
    Not much a friend if she's doing this on purpose and has no respect for what you're doing. Good for you for ordering healthy.
  • Mindful_Trent
    Mindful_Trent Posts: 3,954 Member
    For tomorrow, why don't you just bring your own lunch, since the food is being ordered in? Why should you have to eat the lasagna?

    Regarding your friend and going out to lunch, it sounds like you might have to put your foot down. If you don't want to go out to lunch, KNOWING that she'll take you somewhere unhealthy, then either gracefully refuse and stick to your guns, or request that you pick the location. If your friend is really a friend she should understand - if she gets upset, have an honest talk with her and let her know that you have to do what is right for your health and that you're not saying no because you don't like HER - it's just her food choices that aren't right for you. Remember - you are in control of yourself, and if you don't want to go out to lunch with someone, you don't have to. You shouldn't give in because of social pressure.
  • carynmiko
    carynmiko Posts: 3 Member
    Honestly, if she was really a friend, then she would support you no matter what. If she understands hwo important this is to you and still acts this way, then in my opinion there is only one way to solve this problem! Time to find a new friend! Life is too short to have to deal with negative influences in your life! Be happy and proud that you have decided to take this journey! Surround yourself with people who encourage and support you! This is not only a physical battle, it is a mental battle. We need all the positive we can get!! If she cant understand this, then invite her to join in on this journey with you, or let her off at the next stop and she can take her own path! You can do this! Good luck!
  • skinnylizzard
    skinnylizzard Posts: 460 Member
    Stay true to the course! If you give into her at all, she will keep doing it, but if you stay the course she will eventually get it. See, she thinks you are on the verge of caving into her. Let her know who is boss of your own destiny....NOT HER!!!!
  • savanahspring
    savanahspring Posts: 27
    How exactly does she MAKE you go to lunch?
  • KellieR56
    KellieR56 Posts: 135 Member
    she obviously isn't a true friend. you're doing the right thing! bring in your own lunches.
  • CynthiaCollin
    CynthiaCollin Posts: 406 Member
    Maybe it is time to either tell her how you feel or just not be friends with her. A good friend is supportive and brings positive energy to your life. A friend will eat a salad with you even though they want a burger....just to show their support....A friend is someone who is proud of the hard work you are doing even though you are not on the same journey. Think about it....perhaps it is time for a change or at lest a conversation....or just say no to her when she wants to bring you to those crappy restaurants where no healthy food is available.

    It's just an opinion...you sound really nice and you deserve better:)
  • amandabrady
    amandabrady Posts: 203 Member
    My mom tries to feed me all kinds of junk I used to love and cook me all of my 'unhealthy' favorites. It is easier for others to try and make you fail than for them to step up and have their own success. Push through it, your hard work and determination will pay off!
  • TeenaMarina
    TeenaMarina Posts: 420 Member
    Maybe she's not the person you need to be hanging out with right now.
  • Silky815
    Silky815 Posts: 367 Member
    I say that she is totally jealous of how strong you are, and how much better you are than her. Totally jealous of you. Tell her where to go..in a nice way, and do what you need to do, to stay on the road you are on..to make yourself better. You will make it though this tough time, and look back and see what an A** she was. Don't let her mess you up. Keep your chin up.
  • Fabnover40Kat
    Fabnover40Kat Posts: 300 Member
    We have luncheons all the time and none of my girls are dieting so I just eat my lunch with them! If anyone one asks why you brought your lunch just say your trying to be good! If they dont like it then so what...they will praise(or be extremely jealous) you later when you are slimmer!
  • KaleighL
    KaleighL Posts: 159
    Order an apetizer. The portions are smaller than meals and you can still enjoy and not feel guilty about the food you eat.
  • shreddingit
    shreddingit Posts: 1,133 Member
    thats y i dont have friends...:laugh:
    this is just peer pressure you need to stand your guard...:noway:
  • ChantalD75
    ChantalD75 Posts: 680 Member
    Thank you all for the support!! I know she isn't a true friend I have been told this by many different people... she isn't really liked here at work either maybe I feel sorry for her in a way... I don't know... I also have a hard time saying no to people... another one of my downfalls.... I am going to bring a lunch just in case... I have worked too hard in this short amount of time to have it destroyed....
  • Patriciajane
    Patriciajane Posts: 3
    Some people have a hard time seeing their friends change. You have changed but she hasn't. Time to add to your friend list.
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