Spiraling...

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PhotographerOfNature
PhotographerOfNature Posts: 452 Member
in Motivation and Support
I started last Wednesday on the HCG diet again and was doing so good. Even made it through Friday night and all day Saturday without screwing up. Then Sunday came and it was cold and windy and dreary and I just couldn't fight it anymore and ate a ton of stuff, one right after another. I wasn't hungry any of the time, just wanted to eat. I have so many things that I have taken on that people have asked me to do and I didn't say no when I knew I should. Now I'm overwhelmed and when I'm overwhelmed all I want to do is stuff my face. I feel like I'm riding on the side of a tornado thats spining in a downward circle and I can't stop it or get off.

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  • jipper44
    jipper44 Posts: 111
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    Cheer up! What you did yesterday is done. Start over today and smile! Next time you get the feeling that you're not hungry and all you want to do is eat...decide on something you enjoy doing and when you get that feeling, do that activity instead! It's not foolproof but it's a start. I hope that helps!
  • MochaMixAZ
    MochaMixAZ Posts: 844 Member
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    STOP.

    BREATHE.

    STOP AGAIN (because you probably didn't the 1st time).

    BREATHE AGAIN.

    You're not alone. It's very easy to get overwhelmed. You had a bad day Sunday, sounds like you made some poor choices. Okay. Today is a new day. BREATHE AGAIN.

    You're starting the process right by putting your feelings out there. Sift through them. You mentioned you've got a lot on your plate - time to reprioritize. Gently tell some of them, "I'm very sorry, but I just can't do this right now. I'd like to help in the future, but I've got too much on my plate right now. I appreciate your understanding." It's hard, but you can do it. You'll be better for it - and can put your energy where it needs to go.

    The tornado can devour. Don't let it. It's hard to say "no" to people, but it sounds like you need to. It will help you refocus on YOU. That's not selfish - by focusing on you, you will be able to give more of yourself. The extra stress makes it that much harder to stay on track with your eating... so you've got a great opportunity to take back the control.

    You CAN do this.
  • bmw2488
    bmw2488 Posts: 2
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    I totally get what you're saying. You KNOW what you should do, but there's a part of you that deliberately sabotages whatever good you've managed to accomplish. I am struggling with that right now. I had band surgery in 2007 and had lost about 85 lbs. I had a lot of issues and 2 revision surgeries, and last fall had to have some fluid taken out of the band because I was vomiting 4-5 times a day. Well, when that fluid came out, it was like a free-for-all. I suddenly had the freedom and, lets face it...the luxury of eating whatever I wanted without throwing up! I was in heaven. But, in the span of 5 months, I gained back about 34 pounds. So, now I am losing the same weight AGAIN, none of my clothes fit, and I am generally pissed at myself. But it seems like if it's there, I will eat it. No matter what. Like there's a devil on my shoulder just waiting to throw me off the path. Ugh. This site has ben a godsend, because at least I can see what I'm doing to myself instead of just blindly eating. This is definitely a life-long project, and even with my band, I am still having problems. I am disturbed by my lack of willpower and the ability to just say no to bad foods....it's just like I physically CAN'T. I am just taking it one day at a time....and trying not to get discouraged.

    Keep your chin up!
  • PhotographerOfNature
    PhotographerOfNature Posts: 452 Member
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    Thanks guys! I'm just so down in the snout right now. I looked back at when I started with this site in 2008. I was 193.?. So basically in 3 years, i have lost a total of 12 pounds. Not much for 3 years worth of work. But, i have gained and lost so much in that time. I got down to 169, back up to 186, down to 171, back up to 186, down to 181 and I feel like i'm just conquered. I want to say, fine, I quit! Fat, you win! But, at the same time, I don't, because I hate being fat and feeling like crap in clothes and huffing when I walk. I hate it! I don't know what i am going to do. I'm so done with it all.
  • Cathy92
    Cathy92 Posts: 312 Member
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    I did the same thing you did last night. And, feel awful and annoyed at myself for it. Today, I'm dressed in 'tights' and heading to the gym (full of skinny people). Here I go again. I'll never give up! Don't you either. I have to think it's not a race, but a slow progression to reach my goal.
  • hroderick
    hroderick Posts: 756 Member
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    I had some success with fen-phen then gained it all back and more. Over the years I've observed obese friends and family yo-yo on the popular diet du jour. I had been researching lap band but was scared of it due to some certainty that stapling had contributed to my mother's early demise. So, like when I quit smoking for the last time, I've changed me.

    No diets anymore, just a shift to make honestly counting calories a commitment and exercising an hour every day top priorities. Now after 7 weeks I'm down 18 lb and after 70 weeks I will be down to high school weight. When I'm there I will maintain because I haven't used any temporary tricks. I've only become aware of the calorie in & out and taken responsibility for managing it.

    Some non-temporary things that are helping are
    > a supportive spouse
    > a balance beam scale
    > this web site
    > www.recipe.com
    > a heart rate monitor
    > a kitchen scale
    > a vision of some things I plan after losing the weight (sky dive, scuba dive, hiking, horse riding)

    It's the only real way because I was unlucky in the genetic department.

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