Some Guys Are Just Not Nice

neverbeenskinny
neverbeenskinny Posts: 446 Member
edited September 19 in Health and Weight Loss
So I've been single for a while, about 3 years. I've tried dating some, but not much. I have a confidence issue when it comes to men, but in general I am a very confident person. I have lost 60 pounds and thought after 3 years of being single that I am ready to see what's out there.

My friends talked me into going on line as I don't like to meet men at bars. I met someone on line and we sent e-mails back and forth about 5 or 6 times and he asked to meet me for a drink. I met him last night, and he said to me "you look different from your pictures on line". So I asked him like how different as the oldest one is 6 to 8 months old. He said I look much older and in person I look like I need to hit the gym!!! :cry:


Now I don't want to do this dating thing anymore.:cry:

Replies

  • neverbeenskinny
    neverbeenskinny Posts: 446 Member
    So I've been single for a while, about 3 years. I've tried dating some, but not much. I have a confidence issue when it comes to men, but in general I am a very confident person. I have lost 60 pounds and thought after 3 years of being single that I am ready to see what's out there.

    My friends talked me into going on line as I don't like to meet men at bars. I met someone on line and we sent e-mails back and forth about 5 or 6 times and he asked to meet me for a drink. I met him last night, and he said to me "you look different from your pictures on line". So I asked him like how different as the oldest one is 6 to 8 months old. He said I look much older and in person I look like I need to hit the gym!!! :cry:


    Now I don't want to do this dating thing anymore.:cry:
  • ChubbyBunny
    ChubbyBunny Posts: 3,523 Member
    As a single parent....who took 5 years to finally end up with the right one...It's tough. Especially if you have weight/confidence issues (which are usually related). Obviously he was not the right one. There are a lot of people out there that aren't nice, BUT there are a lot of people who are nice. If you give up the first time out of the gates you are only hindering yourself.

    You can do this. Go slow. No one says you have to meet right off. Heck, I wasn't even gonna give my fiance the time of day when we first met. Stuff happens. Keep your chin up.

    :flowerforyou:
  • Widdy1961
    Widdy1961 Posts: 100 Member
    Do not give up on us guys, as we are not all as uncouth as this idiot.

    Just think yourself lucky that you found out what a sorry person this guy is sooner rather than later.

    Maybe you need to look for one of us English Gentlemen but I am sure there are many Gentlemen out there, I for one would be proud to have you on my arm, unfortunately my wife would probably not be too impressed.

    Don't give up.

    Widdy
  • FitJoani
    FitJoani Posts: 2,173 Member
    So I've been single for a while, about 3 years. I've tried dating some, but not much. I have a confidence issue when it comes to men, but in general I am a very confident person. I have lost 60 pounds and thought after 3 years of being single that I am ready to see what's out there.

    My friends talked me into going on line as I don't like to meet men at bars. I met someone on line and we sent e-mails back and forth about 5 or 6 times and he asked to meet me for a drink. I met him last night, and he said to me "you look different from your pictures on line". So I asked him like how different as the oldest one is 6 to 8 months old. He said I look much older and in person I look like I need to hit the gym!!! :cry:


    Now I don't want to do this dating thing anymore.:cry:
    DO NOT GET DISCOURAGED. He's the @#$HOLE!!!! We have all had our share of losers and this guy seems to take tyhe cake. Especially when you are honest about yourself. He is a superficial moron qwho wants barbie. Barbie isnt real and if she were shed need help bad. You are better than him WAY better than him. Next time tell the loser "Yeah I may need to hit a gym but your a jerk(or an obsenity is more fun), but I can lose wt. and walk out. You will meet someone who loves you for who you aqre and if he makes you feel less than beautiful(which is NOT the case) then give him walking papers you are a beautiful healthy girl and deserve to find a great guy!!!!!
  • tookieb
    tookieb Posts: 89
    Some men can just be *kitten*'s!! But I wouldn't stop trying just 'cause one was rude. I haven't heard many good things about meeting men online. I am currently married but if I were single I think I would still do it the old fashioned way...in person. Keep your chin up. You look great in your profile picture, and I'm sure you look even better in person (camera adds 10 pounds right).
  • jojo52610
    jojo52610 Posts: 692 Member
    OMG what an idiot!!!!!!!!!! ignore him jerk :angry:
  • andnothinghurt
    andnothinghurt Posts: 22
    yea really....thats horrible. im sorry you had to deal with that.
    but dont let one rotten apple spoil the bunch. heh heh.
    keep your head up and im sure you'll meet someone who treats you like the lovely person you are :flowerforyou:
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
    I'm so sorry! What an insensitive clod!!! :angry: I'll bet he doesn't get many repeat dates. The loser!!!
  • lunglady
    lunglady Posts: 526 Member
    Please DO NOT let some idiot ruin dating for you. Obviously, he is not the right guy. At least he showed what an *kitten* he was on the first date, so you didn't waste a lot of your time.

    There are definitely good men out there. I know, because I married one. Don't give up........:heart:
  • Lavendersunday
    Lavendersunday Posts: 458 Member
    I am sorry he hurt you and yet happy you can see how shallow he is!

    Do not doubt your worth, beauty, or whether you are deserving of a loving companion. You were shown this situation for a reason. Learn from it.

    How impowering would it have been after he said this if you simply asked the waiter for the check? Being cool, calm, and collected while seeing the stunned look on his face.

    Thank goodness for men of character. They do exist...do not sette for less!

    ~Namaste :flowerforyou:
  • diannholland1965
    diannholland1965 Posts: 782 Member
    BEEN THERE DONE THAT!!!
    I could tell you stories of my dating life that run along these lines. But my dearest it is a numbers game.
    You have to get through the toads of wich this one is still in the omeba stage. (Sorry for spelling.)
    Before you get to the prince. BUT HE IS OUT THERE. If I can find one then my dearest YOU can find one.
    DO NOT GIVE UP! The Powers that be use these examples for us to look back on and LAUGH at when we are happy with MR Perfectly wonderful!
    Trust me I had my doubts as well.
    But look at this dude this way.
    1.) You are not the ONLY one that he was nasty to I would lay good money on it.
    2) Nasty men are nasty as a power play.
    3) Feel VERY sorry for the POOR girl that you will NEVER meet that DOES get to keep this loser. For her days will be filled with cutdowns and she will NEVER be able to measure up to his non existant standards.
    You are SO lucky to figure out his MASSIVE FLAW up front. instead of months down the road.
    So THANK HIM for being an idiot and PROVING it so fast and MOVE to the next Mr Maybe.
    You will find him dear I PROMISE!!!!
    --Diann...
  • zoepane
    zoepane Posts: 209
    oh my, try again, I met my husband online..You have to be totally honest, and yes most guys are not nice...make sure the next guy knows you are losing weight, sometimes guys just expect all girls to be thin.....
    try talking on line for a few weeks, and than on phone a few times before meeting...Zoe:drinker:
  • diannholland1965
    diannholland1965 Posts: 782 Member
    BTW. I meet MY Mr Wonderful on line. But it took 9 different losers before I got to him. Michael was on line date #10
    --Diann...
  • peej76
    peej76 Posts: 1,250 Member
    He's just an idiot, you'll meet the right one. My aunt set me up once with a friend of her's son. When he picked me up at my parents house my mom and brothers and sister were home but my dad was at work. Once we were driving around for awhile he says " Your dad must be a big guy because your mom's small and the rest of you are big" SAY WHAT????? He dropped me off and said he'd be talking to me soon, but I ignored all his calls and made my sister lie and tell him I wasn't home. The very last time he called he said to my sis "Tell Penny if she doesn't want to miss out on a great guy to give me a call sometime" Needless to say I never called.....Then I married a great guy lol!!
  • Ezzie
    Ezzie Posts: 665 Member
    Jamerz and I met online.....he's got some tales about some of the women he met......OH MY:grumble: :angry: :explode:

    I think there are some signs to watch for with the guys...

    His picture is in front of his car or truck....and he tells you in detail about said vehicle

    He makes a big deal about the size of his......401K

    He complains about the other women he's found online, on the first go round.

    ( I know there are others........)

    Both Jamerz and I swore up and down that we ONLY wanted to have fun...none of that serious stuff....HA! God, Life and the Internet had other plans....:blushing:
  • elliott062907
    elliott062907 Posts: 1,508 Member
    So I've been single for a while, about 3 years. I've tried dating some, but not much. I have a confidence issue when it comes to men, but in general I am a very confident person. I have lost 60 pounds and thought after 3 years of being single that I am ready to see what's out there.

    My friends talked me into going on line as I don't like to meet men at bars. I met someone on line and we sent e-mails back and forth about 5 or 6 times and he asked to meet me for a drink. I met him last night, and he said to me "you look different from your pictures on line". So I asked him like how different as the oldest one is 6 to 8 months old. He said I look much older and in person I look like I need to hit the gym!!! :cry:


    Now I don't want to do this dating thing anymore.:cry:


    shame on him, his loss, you could consider his excuse that he is hiding his inner gayness and he is really jealous that you are prettier then him!!!!!!
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    PEOPLE can be idiots. Just because you met one idiot, doesnt mean there isnt someone out there for you.

    How about a club, or meet up that has something to do with your interests? Dancing, singing, books, school, church, temple....My friend met her BF at a coffee shop, listening to acoustic guitar.

    I feel so bad for you. :mad:
  • auntkaren
    auntkaren Posts: 1,490 Member
    Don't let one Jerk ruin it for you to find the nice guys......just know he is a looser and you were lucky he showed his true colors right away.:wink: Keep looking he is there.
  • dothompson
    dothompson Posts: 1,184 Member
    There are lots of nice guys out there. Just get back on the horse.

    It was your first date, you can't expect to find someone wonderful until you date several guys. Be grateful that you didn't waste months or years on this guy before realizing what a clod he was.
  • may_marie
    may_marie Posts: 667 Member
    i meet my guy online too !!

    i flew all the way from canada to scotland just to meet him ... thats nuts !!!!!!!!!
    if someone was to tell me that they we flying to an other continent to meet and online i would say they are totaly off their heads .....

    dont give up .. i was talking to my boyfriends for years online before i meet him.. take your time.. you'll know when its right ..

    the right person is out there !!!!!!!!!!
    may
  • neverbeenskinny
    neverbeenskinny Posts: 446 Member
    Thanks everyone, I really appreciate the support and the suggestions. I won't give up, I believe there are good guys out there, I just have to find one that's interested in me. I've tried being set up by my friends, joining a few clubs, going to activities with Meetup and Meetin, and doing volunteer work, and I have yet to find someone remotely interesting to me or interested in me. I am just a major DORK when I'm around guys. They love to have me as a "friend" or a buddy, but never romantically interested. The only ones that are ever interested at all are about 25 years older than me.

    I have no doubt I'll eventually find someone, but meanwhile it makes me less and less confident in this arena.
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