falling of the wagon ......the guilt ............

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luanwarren37
luanwarren37 Posts: 34
in Health and Weight Loss
Hi all i have been dieting for 20 yrs and have noticed a pattern that many can relate too ,,i comfort eat ,,emotional eat ,eat when im stressed etc etc ,,i have found that i go a few days totally focused and driven then something happens where i fall off the wagon and have that bit extra that i shouldnt i then feel guilty and then i eat more which makes me more depressed and upset i have my blowout go thru the emotion and then start the cycle again back on the wagon then fall off ,,any tips thoughts ??

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  • mom22nteaching
    mom22nteaching Posts: 32 Member
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    I can relate to that cycle. I have no tips because I haven't figured it out yet. But ....I heard something the other day that made a lot of sense. Instead of thinking about what you can take away think about what you can add in.
    For example add in a salad 2x a day. Hopefully this will fill you and push out carbs or sugar.
    I am going to try to rethink my eating as adding foods.
    I have been dieting for too long and it has not worked.
    A large part is that I am unwilling to 'give up" anything for
    an extended period of time.
    My new diet is an add it.
    Jen
  • sheshe32
    sheshe32 Posts: 195 Member
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    Dont diet. Stop seeing life as a diet. Use MFP, Exercise, eat "normal". Treat yourself, but remember food is to give you nutrients. Once your mind stops seeing life as a diet, things will change. Until then, we stay on the rollercoaster.
  • shoppie
    shoppie Posts: 618 Member
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    I have a tendency to slip a bit eg eat a doughnut, the think 'oh I might as well eat another'. I think a key thing is if you slip not to beat yourself up too much but offset it with exercise or cut back for the rest of the week. beating yourself up only makes you eat morem i'm sure.
  • sparklesammy
    sparklesammy Posts: 465 Member
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    Sont let a bad day turn into a bad week, month, or 20lbs....

    Be honest with yourself. Log everything.

    The guilt makes things worse, try to atone for it!(or some of it) If you have gone over your cals try to excercise till your back in the green.

    (I get trapped in this cycle too! I still turn to food to handle my emotions sometimes. It never really helps, even though i might think so at the time. But the treat food tastes sooooo much better when its enjoyed as an earned reward than as a way of coping with a bad feeling! )
  • Rachel_Leigh84
    Rachel_Leigh84 Posts: 120
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    This could be me talking...i am EXACTLY the same. Its only this morning I have been on about this with my MFP buddies. I fell off the wagon this week and ive been really beating myself up about it. I get sick of that feeling of failure when I slip up. Back on it today though and im going to stay focused.....blah blah blah same old same old ha!!
  • ANeWcRe8N
    ANeWcRe8N Posts: 1,180 Member
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    You have to change the way you think... it isnt a diet.. its a lifestyle change. There are going to be bad days but dont let it ruin the next day or the whole week. You just gotta pick yourself up and keep on. Also you have to change your mind set that food is for fuel not for pleasure.. I know its easier said than done but it'll take some time. I also sometimes have my bad days but Im determined and with prayer things have been going well :) You can do it!!!
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
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    Find something else to turn to when stressed or upset,buy a punching bag and beat the crap out of it.I always found that way more satisfying than food.and more theraputic
  • Goal_Seeker_1988
    Goal_Seeker_1988 Posts: 1,619 Member
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    Your mistake: "DIET" It's not about dieting it's about lifestyle changes. Diets are only tempary which is where alot of people make the mistake and end up gainin back the weight that they have lost. For example: I can't stick to a clean eating diet. I become overwhelmed and fall of the wagon and binge eat.

    You need to understand food. What you put into your body and how you use the food that you are takin in. If you workout @ the gym then you need to look @ what your body needs for fuel.

    If you don't workout then you need to look @ what you should limit what you are eating. Personally for me after goin so long without sugars and sweets my body no longer crave them. If you love salty foods eat something like nuts with sea salt instead of chips.

    Dont' deprieve yourself either. It takes a really long time to be able to eat right. It's easier said then done. If you start out tryin to eat all the right foods and avoid all the bad foods you are gonna set yourself up for failure. The way to break that is to allow yourself your favorite "junk food" once a day until you have the willpower to break away from it.
  • sparklesammy
    sparklesammy Posts: 465 Member
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    Find something else to turn to when stressed or upset,buy a punching bag and beat the crap out of it.I always found that way more satisfying than food.and more theraputic

    This appeals to me...I do a class (body combat) which is non contact obv...but i like to imagine myself winning the fight : )
  • cenafan
    cenafan Posts: 398 Member
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    for me, it's removing the terms "treat" and "reward" from describing food.

    Food isn't either of those things. I am trying to reteach myself on this idea too. I've thought about the vicious circle that is involved in it.

    eat well and feel great
    have a bad day
    use food as a treat to cheer myself up
    consider the day ruined because of the one treat and throw any healthy eating out the window
    feel bad for "undoing" all my hard work
    eat junk food to comfort myself from feeling bad
    remind myself one day doesn't ruin all the hard work

    repeat...LOL

    and the idea of using food as a reward for doing well with eating/exercising is so strange when you think it through.

    so....take the power away from food. control it, not the other way around. :)
  • indycello
    indycello Posts: 147 Member
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    You have described me! Some days I wake up and look in the mirror and still see that fat person and it depresses me... I go and eat...I am aware I shouldn't hVe ate but I did I make a promise to eat betterlater and I don't then I feel guilty... Then later I have a small binge... :(
  • squeaktones
    squeaktones Posts: 195 Member
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    it's okay to slip. don't beat yourself up. if you have things that you are binging with try to find low fat,low calorie substitutions for them. if possible try not to even bring your favorite things into the house, then when you crave them go out and get just one serving of what you want but make yourself earn it first. take an extra walk or do an extra half hour of exercise, i slipped alot this week too. my boyfriend threw my own words back in face when i complained about how hard it is. he told me. it took you this long to get where you are honey. it is going to take time to get to where you want to be. just don't give up.
    luan you are doing great. just keep trying,
  • Elle408
    Elle408 Posts: 500 Member
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    I'm like this during TOM.... of which i'm trying to battle through now. Two bad binge days in a week where i've eaten nothing but cake.... even as i'm eating it I feel guilty... it doesn't stop me though does it? I'm trying to give myself a break and just realise that one or two bad days in a month won't kill me and I won't get fat from it.

    This might be ridiculous psychology, but I'm trying to give my binges less significance. The more time I spend worrying about them, analysing them and fretting over it happening again, the more time and energy i'm wasting focusing on a negative eating habit when I could be spending that energy thinking about my next gym session and how i'm going to improve my form and build muscle and plan a new healthy eating menu for the next day. So far, it's working! An hour ago I was teetering on the edge of a major binge, literally planning on what I could eat without people noticing and heading out to KFC for dinner, now i'm quite happily planning tonights gym session and what's for tomorrows dinner! I've built my resolve back through positive thinking!
  • luanwarren37
    luanwarren37 Posts: 34
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    wow and look how well u done ,,thanx for the message
  • luanwarren37
    luanwarren37 Posts: 34
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    thankyou so much really appreciate it x
  • isabelk
    isabelk Posts: 153 Member
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    Keep logging. Always be very honest with your logging. And if you're having a stressful time, maintain for a week or two. I'm maintaining right now. I mean at some point in the future it will be maintainance plus tune ups, so I'm not going to beat myself up for taking a couple of weeks off of weight loss. I'm not giving up.

    I hope logging and changing your perspective work for you.
  • PrairieRoseNE
    PrairieRoseNE Posts: 265 Member
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    Isn't it ironic that on those days when a person slips up or goes over their calorie limit that they always feel guilty and they beat themselves up for it. Stress about the damage and sometimes even make their situation worse with more emotional eating.

    BUT on the days when we do something terrific - like pass on the glazed donut at coffee break and instead eat the carrot sticks we brought to work - do we ever praise ourselves?? Or go thru the day with a smile on our face and brag about how well we did??

    Why are we like this??

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