"obsessed with weight loss?!"

ANewton401
ANewton401 Posts: 118 Member
edited September 25 in Motivation and Support
My wonderfully supportive boyfriend and my family initially supported me when I decided to drop the extra pounds I had put on over the past couple years. But today my grandmother tells me that I am becoming 'obsessed'. My boyfriend seems concerned with the fact that I will log my food in before I have even prepared it, label my meals for the week with the oz's, and weigh everything. He is concerned that this new lifestyle is consuming me. I have thought about it too but not enough to be truly concerned. I work out 6 times a week fr an hour a day, sometimes 7 (twice in one day), I eat healthy and never go hungry. Today for a snack I had M&Ms and a peice of cake (co-workers bday). In my opinion, someone 'obsessed with weight loss' wouldnt eat cake and M&Ms...right? Either way, now im depressed and eating...a lot...another thing someone obsessed wouldn't do. I am 5'9" and 162 pounds. I want to be in the middle of the healthy weight loss BMI which according to MFP is 147. Until then I want to continue doing what I am diong. When I reach that goal it will be maintenece from there.

Does anyone in your life not get it? I'm i obsessed?

Replies

  • arfdemob5
    arfdemob5 Posts: 109 Member
    I would hardly call that obsessed...it sounds like motivated and dedicated to me. Sometimes the hardest thing to overcome with weightloss is our family! Tell them nicely what your goal is and how you plan to reach it and ask for them to respect your dedication and motivation! Or, just tell them to suck it! LOL
  • TiDinzeo
    TiDinzeo Posts: 309
    I don't think you count as obsessed by any means. You're just doing what you have to do to be who you want to be. I don't think anyone is obsessed with weight loss until they're trying to lose weight below what's healthy. The BMI scale goes down to underweight for a reason.
  • magpie8402
    magpie8402 Posts: 121 Member
    I do a lot of similar stuff, such as logging meals before I eat them. I wouldn't say that we're obsessed, just trying our hardest to make sure this becomes a lifestyle, not just a crash diet. I say keep up the good work!
  • MeredithLee11
    MeredithLee11 Posts: 192 Member
    I don't think you're obsessed. Some people (like everyone here) need to keep track of their food in order to lose weight, rather than just "eating healthy and exercising". I kinda got the same reaction from some friends my first go at calorie-counting to lose weight, and I just learned to not talk about it unless people asked 'cause clearly some people weren't going to be supportive. I think some people get so freaked out by the thought of eating disorders that they assume anyone who tracks their food must have one. That's just my two cents

    Keep up the hard work!
  • emaybe
    emaybe Posts: 187 Member
    My dad does this to me all the time (I work with him and see him several times weekly). I've had an up and down weight loss battle for the last several years. He lacks a little tact, and will talk to me about personal trainers and eating healthy when I'm heavy, and then when I start to drop weight he'll ask if I'm eating enough and if something is wrong. It's really irritating, but I've gotten used to it. He'll figure it out eventually, and if not, I'm doing this for myself, not him. Also, I find "obsessing" over things like serving sizes and nutrients to be a nice mental game to distract me from wanting to eat crap... I don't think that's unhealthy at all. ;)
  • spicegeek
    spicegeek Posts: 325 Member
    I don`t think you are obsessed - some people are blessed with in built good eating habits and / or the metabolism of a freight train some of us have to be careful and if measuring and setting up our food plan in advance is what we need to do - that is what we need to do.

    I make foods in advance and I certainly plan my meals in advance if I`m working rather than at home where I can wing it a little easier.
  • tandroes
    tandroes Posts: 163 Member
    My co-workers jokingly told me they need to have an intervention with me... that made me start thinking about how much i think and talk about food/exercise/losing weight... and they are all disgusted because I don't have much weight to lose. I talked to my husband and mom about it and started thinking of ways i could keep it from becoming an obsession or a problem. I'm not going to stress out if i go over my calorie goal once a month, i'm going to try to stop talking about it so much etc. I'm sure what starts out as dedication can easily turn into obsession... but hey... at least its a healthy obsession!
  • I've gotten a little addicted to measuring, planning, and logging as well. But at the same time, this website has made us all hyper aware of what we are eating. I think its normal to be a little obsessed...besides, its kind of fun! I think it may seem a little abnormal to those who dont use a website like this (like your family members) so although you should continue doing what you are doing, just try and talk about it a little less and maybe they will leave you alone!
  • ChelseaRW
    ChelseaRW Posts: 366 Member
    If you are spending more time on weight loss than relationships...call it obsessed...otherwise call it careful planning. If you beat yourself up for eating a little over your goal or for missing a workout...you may be obsessed. It's perfectly okay to plan unless it consumes you. For those on the outside looking in..a change in habits can appear to be "an obsession" especially when its a behavior that is not the "norm" for them. Kudo's to you for sharing and great job monitoring your intake to a good level. I
  • sassyg
    sassyg Posts: 393
    I guess the way to tell if it is an issue or not is to think about how you would react if something was suddenly out of your control? e. g if someone else prepared a meal, or you couldn't get an exact serving size... Would it be awful, something to stress about, or would you be able to just say, OK I'll do my best, this once won't hurt, and not spend the next week worrying about it?
  • Jhenry20
    Jhenry20 Posts: 7 Member
    I think it's good that you plan and measure your meals; it's something I wish I would do. Mostly for organization though and not having to think during the day "what am I going to eat?" Working our 6/7 days a week probably isn't necessary, but if you enjoy it, and it makes you feel good, there's nothing wrong with it. And if it's just an hour, it's certainly not obsessive. It sounds more like you're trying to live a healthy lifestyle than just lose weight. Some people tend to talk about everything, like food/exercise a lot when they are trying to lose weight or live healthy, and so it may make it seem like that's the only thing on your mind. I don't think you should change what you're doing or worry about it, but make sure you are conscious of how much you talk about it.
  • QueenofCups
    QueenofCups Posts: 365 Member
    Its often hard for those around us to get a handle on our new lifestyles. My friends scoff at me when I say I have more weight to lose, or that I don't consider myself "skinny" like they do. But I know that by comparison, I am skinny. I was obese, now I am not, so by sheer fact of that they think I don't need to lose anymore. But I know that when they see that I am happier b/c I am healthier and I feel good in my own skin, they will get it.
    Don't let others get you down.

    I have the opposite problem with my husband. Since I am eating healthier and losing weight but still have more I want to lose, if I snack on anything "unhealthy" my husband likes to comment about it like "maybe if you didn't eat that, you would have an easier time losing the weight." Well, I know he means to be supportive, but it still hurts. So I have to learn to tune him out. Same with those in my family and friends who want to encourage me to "splurge" AKA "binge on crap" once in a while.

    Most people don't understand that this isn't a diet for a lot of us, its a lifestyle change. I will never go back to sitting on my butt all day. I will never go back to eating McDonalds 4x a week. I am just not that person anymore. Eventually they will see that.
  • Dawntodusk
    Dawntodusk Posts: 262 Member
    I think that you're the only one who can answer that. It's an attitude. There might be people who do everything you're doing, but they're not obsessed, whereas someone else might be. I guess it depends on how much you stress out if - for example - you can't weigh something or you miss a workout. That might tell you if you have an obsession or not.
  • shreddingit
    shreddingit Posts: 1,133 Member
    nah your not they just dont get it I guess
    if you were you would not eat a thing and weigh every single minute of your life..now thats obsessed..
  • I would express to them that you appreciate their concern & then give them examples of how they can really help. If it makes them feel better, explain to them what an "obsessed" person would truly be doing and tell them if they ever see THOSE things, then they can come to you IN LOVE and express their concerns.

    It's rough. They love you. They want the best for you. They've seen you, you're entire life, living one way. Now, they see you changing and it's strange and they don't understand. The same we have to adjust and create a new lifestyle, the people around us have to adjust to seeing us in the lifestyle we choose to lead now.

    I pray they'll come around and all will be well.

    *hugs*

    Jean
  • ANewton401
    ANewton401 Posts: 118 Member
    I would express to them that you appreciate their concern & then give them examples of how they can really help. If it makes them feel better, explain to them what an "obsessed" person would truly be doing and tell them if they ever see THOSE things, then they can come to you IN LOVE and express their concerns.

    It's rough. They love you. They want the best for you. They've seen you, you're entire life, living one way. Now, they see you changing and it's strange and they don't understand. The same we have to adjust and create a new lifestyle, the people around us have to adjust to seeing us in the lifestyle we choose to lead now.

    I pray they'll come around and all will be well.

    *hugs*

    That is a wonderful idea,; giving examples of obsession and asking they come to me "in love" if they have a concern. Thank you!

    Jean
  • ANewton401
    ANewton401 Posts: 118 Member
    I guess the way to tell if it is an issue or not is to think about how you would react if something was suddenly out of your control? e. g if someone else prepared a meal, or you couldn't get an exact serving size... Would it be awful, something to stress about, or would you be able to just say, OK I'll do my best, this once won't hurt, and not spend the next week worrying about it?
    That is an interesting persepctive. I would say that when presented with that situation I tell myself I will do my best. Thank you!
  • nkswans
    nkswans Posts: 469 Member
    Today I logged on to MFP during a class break and a friend saw and seemed almost disgusted that I was counting and logging calories. I told him it works for me, and I actually enjoy doing it. I am a very organized person and a food journal helps me with my weight loss. I didn't enjoy the criticism from him. Perhaps one day I won't have to log every calorie because I will be better with portion size and so on but until then I'm sticking with it.
  • A,

    In today's high carb, high fat, over processed , and fast food society; there is nothing wrong about being aware of what you are putting into your body. The truth about weight loss for anyone is what they think of themselves in the mirror. If you look in the mirror and do not like what you see; this can have a tremdous effect on your self-esteem, attitude, and how you allow others to treat you. I am a 6'0 foot tall male and I weigh as of today, 184 pounds. Some people may say that is an o:K weight, but I still do not like what I see in the mirror. My goal is 170 and I have a long way to go and will I be happy at 170? or will I feel the same way...only time can tell?. Obesity is a modern epidemic and it is rampid in our culture. The hardests thing to do is to find a balance between good health and obession with weight loss. This is a question that will plague our culture for many years. What is good health? Only you can answer that? What is obsession? That can only be answered by the person who ponders it? I myself share the same feelings as you, and I have not answered the question yet myself. Perhaps, we can find the answer together.

    Regards,
    David
  • EmpressOfJudgment
    EmpressOfJudgment Posts: 1,162 Member
    Sweetpea, you are not obsessed. You are just determined. It's been proven over decades that people who log their food are more successful at weight loss. And I remember when I went to Weight Watchers in the past there was this cheesy quote, "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail." It's hokey, but it's true! And that's what you are doing. Pre-logging your food isn't obsession. It's organization and planning. In other aspects of our lives people would say that's the key to success. Why not here?

    I do understand what you are going through, for sure. My bf is the same way. He thinks all I have to do is eat healthy and exercise and the weight will fall off. Yet, he and I have been together for almost a year and a half and he's seen me eating healthy and exercising the whole time, yet gaining and losing the same 7 or 8 pounds. He also thinks calorie counting is obsessive. The thing is, he doesn't get it because he's one of those people who starts to get a little soft, so he goes to the pool and swims a few laps a couple times a week and he's fine. He doesn't get that just because walnuts and olive oil are "good" for you, you can't eat as much as you want. It seems absurd to him.

    Like others have said, unless this journey is causing your relationships to suffer, I doubt you are obsessed. It's just one of those things. Some people just don't understand because they have different experiences. Do what I've had to do with my bf (multiple times). Explain to the people that are concerned that this is what you need to do to meet your goals and you'd appreciate their support. And if they don't get it, you can move here to Chicago with me and we'll start a commune with others who don't get the support they need at home. We can grow fruits and veggies up on my roof and sell homemade goods to buy things we can't grow ourselves. ;)
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