are we sometimes congratulating people for undereating? Loo

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Replies

  • velvetkat
    velvetkat Posts: 454 Member
    I am under my calorie goal everyday and I eat a well balanced day of food. I do not feel like I am starving. Now I may only bee 100 or less under the 1200 cal but my main concern is the exercise calories. If I eat the exercise calories I might as well go back to the way I used to eat. I burn around 1500-1800 calories a day in exercise. That comes out to 2700-3000 calories a day. I cant eat that unless I eat unhealthy foods and that seems counterproductive. No one seems to have the answer on whether we eat those calories or not. Some people eat them and lose others don't and also lose.
    I congratulate people for when the are logged in for a certain amount of days because that means they are still committed to their weight loss. If I had given up I certainly wouldn't be on here. I'd be back on facebook or playing games instead.
    I do comment on peoples diaries and questions I have about certain foods etc. Logging in for me is half the battle. Makes me accountable for what I eat. Sometimes I think the people that don't have their diaries public is because the default is private and they don't know how to do it. I know I saw others when I first got here that said...:view diary" and mine didn't so I went hunting to see how to change it.
    I like when people comment as it makes me feel like people really care about what I am doing. Not necessarily what I am eating.
    my 2 cents!
    Kat
  • LUV2CRUZ
    LUV2CRUZ Posts: 356 Member
    Man, people really jump to conclusions! You should all know that she was talking about ridiculously low numbers of calories and not the 1200 to 1500 calorie range. Most of us also do the up and down thing with our calories but if you are exercising and trying to eat 700 or 800 calories a day....THAT COMMENT WAS INTENDED FOR YOU....out of concern and caring......:huh:
  • velvetkat
    velvetkat Posts: 454 Member
    Man, people really jump to conclusions! You should all know that she was talking about ridiculously low numbers of calories and not the 1200 to 1500 calorie range. Most of us also do the up and down thing with our calories but if you are exercising and trying to eat 700 or 800 calories a day....THAT COMMENT WAS INTENDED FOR YOU....out of concern and caring......:huh:

    I don't think anyone said that it wasn't out of concern or caring. This, I thought was a discussion and everyone is entitled to their opinion.
  • Black_Swan
    Black_Swan Posts: 770 Member
    If I notice someone is undereating and exercising like crazy, I usually simply de-friend them. I cant make myself give some advice and tell someone how they should live, its their thing only...specially if its a total stranger... but it makes me uncomfortable and thats why I am not friends with them.
  • GA_Gyrl
    GA_Gyrl Posts: 25 Member
    True! However if someone MEETS their caloric intake but then workout that's the difference. If you meet your caloric intake, workout THEN take BACK in what you burned....wouldnt that defeat the purpose!?
  • allimac09
    allimac09 Posts: 33
    How do you see what someone ate? Sorry, I'm new to this... I go to people's pages and I can't find that. I do agree. Although I have been under for most of this week and I'm just not hungry or I don't have much time while I work. Today is my day off, with lots of healthy stuff though!
  • rockabillydarlin
    rockabillydarlin Posts: 240 Member
    There's an option in your food and exercise diary for notes -- it's at the bottom of the page. Maybe you can log those things there if you want? That way when people look they'll see it too.

    I just really wanted to say that I really liked your signature. I love the idea that you set yourself little mini-goals and reward yourself! I will definitely have to do that to help keep myself motivated! Thanks for the great idea! :)

    Thanks! I actually got the idea from another MFP member. There are things I always want to buy and sometimes I feel guilty (I'm planning a wedding so money is kind of an issue as of late lol). But if I space out my rewards and buy things I really want when I reach a goal, I feel better about it and it gives me an incentive to keep up my tracking and exercise. :)
  • rockabillydarlin
    rockabillydarlin Posts: 240 Member
    How do you see what someone ate? Sorry, I'm new to this... I go to people's pages and I can't find that. I do agree. Although I have been under for most of this week and I'm just not hungry or I don't have much time while I work. Today is my day off, with lots of healthy stuff though!

    Some people have their food diaries set to private, so you won't be able to see them. When people on your friends list complete their daily diaries and they are open to view, there's usually a link next to "So-and-so completed their food diary for whatever date and they were under their goal" or whatever. You can click it and read. :)
  • RMinVA
    RMinVA Posts: 1,085 Member
    I read this the other day on a blog post by Tom Venuto, so maybe it will put a few things in perspective. The article was about "starvation mode" - which I think is a much overused term. And it doesn't actually exist...the correct term is "adaptive thermogenesis," but that's another post entirely. Anyway from Tom's post....

    "The big doozy is the (mythical) girl who (claims) she’s eating “only 300 calories a day and not losing weight.” Funny how you put her in a metabolic ward on 1000-1200 calories a day (measured and enforced) and she starts losing weight like crazy. That wasn’t starvation mode caused by a 300 calorie per day “slow metabolism.” The damaging admission you’ll never hear from our physics-defying girl is, “I suck at counting calories and I underreport how much I eat…. Oh yeah, I overestimate how many calories I burn too.” [end sarcasm]"

    The reality is people's journals are a classic example of "garbage in, garbage out." They are only as good as the entries they actually make. And even then, can still be very inaccurate.
  • lcarr417
    lcarr417 Posts: 16
    I had one of those bad days yesterday where I felt like I ate a good portion, especially a greasy lunch but when I logged everything in at 10 pm on my food/excercise diary, i still had 800 calories left. YIKES!
    i was curious if my status would read "under calorie goal" and it did, so i commented so everyone would know I was way under goal, and not to congratulate me.

    MFP should add criteria to their site that will change the status updates to mirror the same info you receive when you complete your calorie goal. "laurie completed her diary and was very low in calories to a point of being unhealthy" and similiar for over goal. only time it should be okay is a small percentage above/below your personal goal.

    thats my 2 cents...now off to lunch!
  • sophjakesmom
    sophjakesmom Posts: 904 Member
    I don't always have to have my Starbucks!

    Now that is just crazy talk!
  • lloydrt
    lloydrt Posts: 1,121 Member
    if Im under for the day, its because I probably went over a few days before and am kind of trying to cut back a bit for that day.............geez, :( Im sad now, because I always , always like it when people congratuted me on a good job for that day.........

    Now Im sad..... :(
  • AngieMMc
    AngieMMc Posts: 152 Member
    I like that you just came out and said what everyone appeared to already be thinking. I have had the same thought and ALWAYS look at someone's diary before commenting on whether it was good or not. If someone is several hundred calories under thier goal, I just don't say anything but that's prob not the right thing to do either bc when I first started using MFP I wish someone had told me I wasn't eating enough. I like your honesty a lot and thank you for throwing that out there. We are here to help one another and telling each other what we think the other wants to hear isn't helpful. Don't get me wrong, I don't want a lecture but if someone sees my sodium way too high, I think they should be honest and make suggestions on helping me lower it for example.

    Thanks again!!!
  • perrytyra
    perrytyra Posts: 357 Member
    I didn't read any of the replies, but I sort of agree with you. Some of us need the 'good job' for logging in everyday. It takes commitment to keep it up. When someone doesn't log in for a week, we say, 'hey we miss you, come back'.

    I do congratulate people for coming in under goal, but I also congratulate them for just posting their diary for the day. I have noticed that no one congratulates me when I go over. But, whatever.

    I have a couple of friends on here who seem like that don't eat enough most days. I don't really congratulate that. I have a friend who has a hard time eating breakfast. So when she doesn't eat it, I give her a friendly reminder, and when she does, I say good job!

    Different forms of motivation work for everyone, so I just try to be encouraging any way I can.
  • runlorirun
    runlorirun Posts: 389
    When I respond to someone's food tracker post, I am telling them good job for tracking, not for being under. I have been under on all mine, but when someone tells me 'good job' I take it as good job for tracking, not good job for being under.

    Sometimes there are unknown reasons why someone is under. Yesterday my night was hectic, I didn't eat dinner until close to 9 pm and I was not going to hit all my calories. I was under by 150, but the day before I was only off by 62, I was full at the end of the day and just didn't feel the need to eat more to fill the 62 cals that were left.

    For me I am learning to listen to my body and if I am done eating for the day then I am done. I do try to come as close as possible though.
  • hypergrl
    hypergrl Posts: 188 Member
    I don't really look at what others are eating or their whether they have made their goals for the day. I do think you have to be careful about not getting all your calories in...a lot of people don't realize that it's not going to help make you lose weight any faster...it actually makes you keep weight on.

    I'm not a real big eater...so I have to MAKE myself eat enough to get all my calories in...but I'm sure most peeps are just saying good job on keeping track of it and maybe we should put out the occassional hey you aren't getting enough calories becareful you're going to go into starvation mode.
  • anna_b1
    anna_b1 Posts: 588 Member
    I've really struggled over this myself.

    There is one of MFP friend who always eats well under her calorie limits. I've made a few comments (as have a few others) with something like, "Are you intending to eat something else?" or "Lots of cals left. Eat something yummy" only to be met with a reply along the lines of, "I'm stuffed" or "Couldn't eat another thing" or nothing at all. Lately, I just don't comment on this particular friend and I notice no one else does either. I suspect we won't be friends for long.

    In another instance, someone who I thought was a good friend on here was chronically undereating. This was in my early days here at MFP where I hesitated to say anything critical since I myself was learning how to fit this lifestyle in. Well, one day this friend asked why she wasn't losing after polishing off almost a whole bottle of champagne/wine. Remember, she asked for feedback. As it turns out, she was still woefully under her calorie goals. Well, a number of us on her friendship list responded honestly expressing concern about her food choices and how she habitually under her calorie limit. Her response was to ceremoniously un-friend us and leave me a nasty note as to why I was in no position to tell her what to do. In that instance, I was happy to "lose" her. I've since learned a number of others have met with the same fate.

    It's a slippery slope, but if we're going to buy into what this website is selling, we do have to be mindful about our cheerleading efforts.
  • StevLL
    StevLL Posts: 921 Member
    I agree with you to a point. For those that are morbidly obese (I'm one) Any attempt to excercise and making the effort to log are important when first starting out. The morbidly obese actually can get away with eating less of their excercise calories in the begining, but have to work to increase those as time goes by and their bodies become more efficient. I have friends that are 9 cals below their goal and that includes eating their excercise calories and thats a win in my book. I only eat about half of my calories back mostly in the form of protein to recover from the heavy workouts. I routinely come under my daily cals, but not on my off workout days and am still losing about 2.8 lbs a week steadily. If an MFP friend doesn't have a public diary, but is making steady losses and steady effort I will give them Kudos for sure. I will also ask as nicely, but clearly as possible if they ask for it or are stuck, "What are you eating, Are you drinking enough water, are your calories clean or junk and whats your sodium intake? So far nobody has been offended, but if that happens they'll get over it as I know I will have the moment I press enter. So defintely your points are good, just please try not to judge just by the numbers, but by their stat progress and their place of health as well. As a former powerlifter and gym rat in another life my weight came because I contiued to eat like I was 25 and lifting when in fact I've been sedentry for the last 20 or so years. Baby steps will get these folks where they need to be and solid engouragement and kind but effective feedback will lead them to the right conclusions. Please be patient and caring. A Heart centered is the key. If anybody wants to friend me I can always use a good butt kickin' :bigsmile:
  • darrcn5
    darrcn5 Posts: 495 Member
    Well, in all fairness, someone could have their settings set to lose one pound a week but really be striving to lose 1.5-2 pounds a week, so of course they will be under some days. I don't see anything wrong with this. They might have it set to one pound a week because they think they can definitely hit that target. I know one of my friends does this.

    Also, I know I am purposefully under by 200-300 some days because I KNOW I am going to be having a splurge day or meal where I am definitely doing to be over. I look at my net weekly calories too, not just the day to day stuff.
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