Strange and stupid weight loss ideas

Puggled
Puggled Posts: 26
edited September 25 in Chit-Chat
I always get nagged when at work to think out of the box. That got me thinking about thinking about out of the box ideas for weight loss (it beats thinking about food). What are the most extreme absurd and silly ideas anyone's ever heard for loosing weight? The two that were suggested me a few years ago were:

Prison - A nutritionalist I know used to work for the Prison authorities and she said that prisoners lost weight quite dramatically because it's a stressful environment and there's not much to do but exercise or manual labour. I'm kind of thinking that I'll stick to counting calories instead of counting days off my sentence. On the plus side it's a silver lining to a cloud not that it's much comfort to prisoners.

H plan diet (AKA heroin) - Another friend suggested this one saying that junkies usually weigh next to nothing. I'll not even begin to go near what's wrong with that. It'll be easier to cover what's right about it... nothing.

Smoking - See the previous mentioned H plan diet for my views on smoking :smokin:

Do you have any extreme, stupid, absurd and down right scarey ideas for loosing weight? I'd love to hear them.
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Replies

  • Aintplayin
    Aintplayin Posts: 102
    LOL.. excellent.

    You know, I've been hearing really great things about that cabbage soup diet. :wink:
  • Michelle_J
    Michelle_J Posts: 362 Member
    laxatives-enough said....
  • TheNewStacie
    TheNewStacie Posts: 187 Member
    Pregnancy or should I say more along the lines of morning sickness.....you know little calories in, tons of it back out :-) There's an absurd one for you :bigsmile:
  • iDreamNEON
    iDreamNEON Posts: 112
    LOL Michelle beat me to it but yeah laxatives everyday cannot be healthy.
  • Puggled
    Puggled Posts: 26
    I've heard about cabbage soup diets. Surely you must end up with horrific flatulence or is that part of plan? Fill yourself with hot air so your lighter on the scales :laugh:
  • poustotah
    poustotah Posts: 1,121 Member
    I remember when speed was a popular way to lose weight.

    Someone recently suggested meth as a means to lose weight.

    I personally think the 'evolution' of the Atkins diet is fairly silly - ya know, the one where you eat cheeseburgers with no bun. I read Dr. Atkins diet plan - he doesn't talk about eating cheeseburgers with no bun.
  • Martha_VH
    Martha_VH Posts: 386 Member
    This one is absurd in retrospect...

    Remember back 10-15 years ago... When all fat was the enemy...
    We were told to eat everything that is low fat, and cut out all high fat foods including the healthy unsaturated fats...
    And so we would eat food that instead were high in processed sugar, sodium and carbs.
  • Nomomush
    Nomomush Posts: 582 Member
    I heard a couple of girls at the gym talking about eating strictly baby food. I almost tripped on the treadmill cause it made me turn and look so quickly. :noway:
  • ShellyMacchi
    ShellyMacchi Posts: 975 Member
    here's one for you...

    how about ingesting a derivative of urine collected from pregnant women with the expectation that it will help you lose weight, and.. why not just eat 500 calories a day while doing so?

    oooooooops *chuckles* sorry... couldn't help myself

    (sorry HCG fans *S*)
  • dlaplume2
    dlaplume2 Posts: 1,658 Member
    Grapefruit diet.

    On the heroin diet; at least you might be able to keep it off when you're in jail. :bigsmile: Still thinking I'll avoid that though.
  • Puggled
    Puggled Posts: 26
    Not that I want to try this, it's purely curiosity. How do you collect pee from pregnant women. Surely Ebay draws the line at fecal matter and urine.
    here's one for you...

    how about ingesting a derivative of urine collected from pregnant women with the expectation that it will help you lose weight, and.. why not just eat 500 calories a day while doing so?

    oooooooops *chuckles* sorry... couldn't help myself

    (sorry HCG fans *S*)
  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
    The Jenny Crank Diet. Meth is great, it speeds up your metabolism,you lose weight, lose interest in nutrition, you get plenty of exercise running from the cops and other meth heads, AND for maintenance, your teeth rot and fall out, preventing you from eating anything really solid, mostly Doritos and Mt. Dew. It's a lose, lose proposition.
  • MrsWendyQ
    MrsWendyQ Posts: 125 Member
    I know a girl who yo-yo's something terrible...her "secret"...smoking non-stop and pretty much eating nothing but lettuce and ranch dressing....um NO THANK YOU!!! Disgusting!
  • bmontgomery87
    bmontgomery87 Posts: 1,260 Member
    sugar free jello all day.


    using tobacco to curb appetite. it works, but not exactly a safe idea.
  • koosdel
    koosdel Posts: 3,317 Member
    TAPE WORM!!!!
  • klininger
    klininger Posts: 44
    I saw someone on MFP yesterday suggest to a fellow MFP'er to eat and purge.
  • Sonofabiscuit2
    Sonofabiscuit2 Posts: 323 Member
    USMC basic training guaranteed to get you to their standard, though you may have to go off to war.

    I'm a vet, so I'm not insulting service just saying it's a crazy way to lose weight especially since you sign a 4 year contact and can ber obligated for a total of 8 years despite what your contract says.
  • ladyhawk00
    ladyhawk00 Posts: 2,457 Member
    The Lemon Detox Diet. Stupidity in a glass, IMO.
  • Puggled
    Puggled Posts: 26
    I've just heard this one - frost bite

    I think I might consider heroin before hacking limbs off in one of the most painful ways possible.
  • TheNewStacie
    TheNewStacie Posts: 187 Member
    TAPE WORM!!!!

    I was just about to say that! :-)
  • RGPargy
    RGPargy Posts: 285 Member
    My friend never used to put sugar in her tea. She used to put SPEED in her tea instead!! :noway:
  • thumper44
    thumper44 Posts: 1,464 Member
    Pills that contain huge amounts of caffeine. Let's get your heart going in super super mode. :noway:
  • KrisPage
    KrisPage Posts: 539 Member
    TAPE WORM!!!!

    I was just about to say that! :-)
    ME TOO
  • xerinx2011
    xerinx2011 Posts: 222
    The maple syrup diet- I mean really who wants to drink a glass of water with maple syrup and chilli powder in!!

    The baby food diet my mate tried needless to say that lasted 3 days!!

    Cutting out major food groups!

    When i was 17 i went on a soup diet 2 tins of soup a day and nothing else and running every morning and night!! That lasted all of a week!

    Spending all my money on booze when i was younger happened for 6 months... i lived off super noodles everyother day (was much more interested in going out and having fun than eating) i lost quite a bit of weight... then i grew up and started eating and piled the weight on!!
  • daloverlyme
    daloverlyme Posts: 583 Member
    Syrup of Ipecac! Oh and the horrid fat burner pill...with oil. The one where you had to bring extra cloths with you because of "accidents". http://angryaussie.wordpress.com/2007/06/20/miracle-diet-pill-with-teeny-tiny-side-effect/ WARNING VERY STRONG LANGUAGE.
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
    Beverly Hills Cocaine Diet -- Very popular in the late 70's and early 80's. Worked.
  • IamOnMywayNow
    IamOnMywayNow Posts: 470 Member
    The Jenny Crank Diet. Meth is great, it speeds up your metabolism,you lose weight, lose interest in nutrition, you get plenty of exercise running from the cops and other meth heads, AND for maintenance, your teeth rot and fall out, preventing you from eating anything really solid, mostly Doritos and Mt. Dew. It's a lose, lose proposition.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Adelphia
    Adelphia Posts: 176
    Cocaine's a hell of a drug. :smokin:

    Or my typical diet at fifteen: nothing but Rockstars and toppingless frozen yogurt. Yaaaaay. :laugh:
  • Omicron
    Omicron Posts: 48 Member
    Man I was gonna say tapeworm. Dysentery would be a close second though.
  • CorydonCutie
    CorydonCutie Posts: 185 Member
    Sudafed...the kind they now keep behind the counter and drink a caffinated diet soda. It's supposed to speed up your heart and metabolism. Never tried it. I like the method I'm using now...diet and exercise. :)
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