Weird Injuries...

All. The. Time. In middle school I taught myself to shave WITHOUT lotion or shaving cream, and now 5 years later my knees are dappled in purple shaving scars. So lovely. I have two random cuts on the back of my left thumb, and an assortment of scratches on my knuckles from making the bed.

Domestic activities leave the worst scars, I've found...

The best ones are the mystery injuries--where you just wake up with a bruise or a scrape and have no idea how you got it. ( No alcohol involved either. )

I dislocated a rib from walking too much....never thought that was possible.

I grew up on a go-kart track and in the morning when I was opening up the track, I had to start all the go-karts and bring them for a lap and then park them... Well, I started the go-kart, as I sprang to get in the kart, I kicked the steel frame and split my pinkie toe right under the nailbed.. It was awful!

In 8th grade, I was in industrial tech and we were printing our own paper... I had long hair and I leaned over the machine to see the paper coming out and my hair got sucked in and wound around the gears of the machine. Thankfully, I had the teacher wind the machine back and I was able to pull most of my hair out... I did get a concussion and lost quite a bit of hair!

One other time I split the skin right between my 4th toe and pinkie toe because I somehow got it caught under the leg of the kitchen chair I was sitting on... It all happend so fast.. not sure how I did that one!

I once had to take 3 days off work because I tripped over a shoe.

I broke my toe rather than kick the dog. It was in the midst of the pre-Hurricane Ike chaos and I was trying to get around the her. She was panicked and wouldn't get out of my way. When I tried to dodge her, I stubbed my toe on the kitchen table. Actually had to have surgery on it. :ohwell:

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !!!!!!!!!! Cervical lol!

I'm still coming back from my weird injury. In early November, I tore my medial meniscus (knee cartilage), got it surgically repaired, feeling great! The day after surgery, I was walking thru the bathroom, and slipped (I did not fall!!) in my wife's hairspray slick on the floor and burst three discs in my lower back. After three weeks of increasingly aggressive therapies, I had it surgically repaired in late February. I still have some significant nerve damage to my lower leg and foot. Freaky!
Ted

After hitting the ball playing while playing softball, I tripped over my own two feet coming out of the box and basically face planted.... we call it getting hit by a sniper... It happens often...lol Also I once had food poisioning (unknowingly),I was outside cleaning up after a hurricane that had come through at work, felt ill and went inside. Dizzy, I stumbled into the mens room and to reach to open the stall door and fainted and wound up splitting head open on the stall divider... luckily it was just a few stitches. I think my pride was hurt more than anything else, telling my all male coworkers what happened was the worst part. And finally, I slipped and fell out of a treestand while hunting a few years back... it had just finsihed raining and everything was wet... There were piles of leaves all around and my big behind had to find the biggest root around to fall on. Had a giant bruise from my butt to my hip for about two months, every shade of black and blue and purple you can imagine was there.

i was thrown from a lawn mower trailor, being pulled by a lawn mower, and when i landed my collar bone found the only random brick in the yard to land on, and it broke my collar bone...

last summer i insisted on taking my dog out without shoes on. my mother warned me... but i'm 25 and i "don't need my mommy any more." yeah... two steps onto the cement patio and i some how managed to get my toes bent underneath my right foot, putting all my weight onto 2 toes and scraping the hell out of them. i almost passed out from the pain. 2 broken toes later and i'm not ashamed to say i need my mommy.

I teach third grade, so whenever there's a holiday, I usually end up with several small gifts, whether it's candy or Bath and Body Works stuff, etc. It was no big deal when one of my kids brought me one of those over-sized Hershey's kisses last year for Valentine's Day, but about a week later, I ended up in the ER getting stitches. Here's what happened:

I got home from a long day of school and decide I'm going to have some chocolate. (By the way, if you know the appropriate way to eat these, please let me know. I'm tempted to write the Hershey's company to find out. ) Well, Oprah or Ellen or something interesting was on TV, so I decide in my infinite wisdom that I'm just going to take my chocolate in a plastic bowl, and a very sharp knife to the living room to eat. (Bad decision number one.) I sit next to the arm of the couch with my legs up on the couch and put my Kiss and bowl on the arm. Not having much luck with trimming off the edges, I decide to insert the knife from the top of the Kiss and cut straight down. This worked out fine for a few minutes. Then, for some reason, I moved the bowl onto my leg and continue to chop off my chocolate. I apparently got to a really thick part that wouldn't cut off as easily as the other, had been, so here I go, pushing almost as hard as I can (forgetting that the bowl is on my leg). Yep, stabbed myself right in the thigh.

The part my husband and friends enjoy the most: I stabbed through the Kiss, through the plastic bowl, through a blanket that was on my lap, through my pants, and into my leg. I wasn't really thinking of the "never pull the knife out" rule, so I did not go to the hospital with everything still "attached".

That was Valentine's Day, 2010, so now I have a little scar about an inch long, and my teaching partner still calls me "Slash".