Unsupportive Hubby!

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futbolista10
futbolista10 Posts: 33
in Motivation and Support
Ughhh!!! I don't know if its just my spouse, but he KNOWS I'm trying to lose weight yet he continues to bring home fast food and other FAT foods!!! Its soooo hard to stay on this diet when hes eating a burger in front of my face, yet he wonders why I get mad and go to the room? Tried sitting down and talking to him about it but he just blows it off. Any suggestions on how to get through to him or what to do?

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  • crystaln05
    crystaln05 Posts: 8
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    Sounds like he needs to realize how important this is to you. My fiance and I cook together and workout together. I find it very helpful but if he doesn't want to join you then he needs to at least support you. I'd talk to him. Support is a huge thing especially when your fighting a hard battle like losing weight. Good luck hun!
  • mandamama
    mandamama Posts: 250
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    I feel like no matter where we go there are going to be temptaions, no matter who it is. Jut as you are choosing to change your eating, is choosing to eat a burger. Just a matter of will power and wanting better for yourself. Unfortunately I have figured out, the world doesn't change just because I change. And that's okay. I had a burger the other day and it was great, I am of the mind set that once in a while isn't awful. If I am having a burger once a month as opposed to once a week I feel like I am going to be okay!
  • mandamama
    mandamama Posts: 250
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    Oh yeah and I have found that having a snack I love helps. Oli have a new found addiction to hummus Mmmm so I don't feel like I am being punished I feel like I am just choosing something I like better :)
  • liscar
    liscar Posts: 311 Member
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    sometimes the spouse sabotages because of their own insecurities.....if you get all hot, fit, and sexy.....maybe you want them anymore

    Try getting him to join with you, to work out together, have fitness goals or challenges. Try taking the "we need to eat healthy" instead of "I'm on a diet".

    Maybe challenge each other to an inches lost total or sign up for an upcoming 5k to do together.
  • WarmFuzzy
    WarmFuzzy Posts: 8 Member
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    Have you tried finding ways to make what he wants to eat, in a way that's also healthy? Many times our husbands hear 'diet' & think 'rabbit food'.

    You can make steak, veggies & potatoes while still staying healthy, low-fat & within your calorie goals. Try talking to him about meal-planning, instead of asking him to stop eating what he likes.

    At the times he does come home with food you don't want to eat & are tempted by, make sure you have snacks for yourself that are IRRESISTABLE!

    And, check out the fast food places online to see what you can order that won't impede your progress... then, when he says he's going to Qdoba or Burger King, you can say "great, can you get me XXX?"

    Basically, try making him part of your success, instead of making him feel like an obstacle that needs to change his habits just because you are trying something different. In time, he might come around, but if he doesn't, you need to make it work for the long-term. Best of luck!!
  • lauriallen
    lauriallen Posts: 39
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    I am so sorry that you don't have the support that you so deserve in this new endeavour that your seeking. Did you not take vows, in sickness and health through good times and bad....well this is your health that your trying to make better and he really needs to be supportive. If he chooses to eat those foods that's fine, but don't bring them home eat them before you come home if it's what he really needs. But I liked the comment prior, learn to cook together.
    I know that my hubby tries to be as supportive as he can, but I was a rollercoaster dieter (until now) so he was just waiting for me to say "nope not doing this". But I'm going on week 3 and the thought of not doing this hasn't even crossed my mind. He is happy for me and I've got him involved with helping me burn calories and picking out healthy snacks and meals.
    If you need support pls feel free to add me, I'll help you as best I can.
    Don't give up on him, keep talking to him about how important it is to you. You deserve support.
  • JeepOnRock
    JeepOnRock Posts: 28
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    I guess I can't complain... after I started, my wife decided to join MFP and lose a couple of pounds, too. But, I still have to deal with friends and others that aren't as supportive. I just blow it off.

    I know that it can be tough sometimes. At least you have a community of us here that will listen and be supportive.

    Best of luck.
  • futbolista10
    futbolista10 Posts: 33
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    Great feedback! I do 100% agree with the "we eat healthy" instead of "im on a diet" I'm defintely going to try that. However, he is one of those skinny people who can eat whaaateverrrr they want and not gain a single pound!! I do envy that, lol.
  • mufiey
    mufiey Posts: 38
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    sounds like sabotage to me .my husband use to do it to me. i would start losing weight and he would start bringing my favorite candy car home. then one night he ask me if i was going to leave him when i lost all the weight. . . and just because your guy is skinny doesn't mean he's not insecure
  • futbolista10
    futbolista10 Posts: 33
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    sounds like sabotage to me .my husband use to do it to me. i would start losing weight and he would start bringing my favorite candy car home. then one night he ask me if i was going to leave him when i lost all the weight. . . and just because your guy is skinny doesn't mean he's not insecure

    It so funny you say that! because last night he said "Screw it I"m gonna eat what I want and eat it right in front of you!" Ugh I was so pissed and when he went through the drive through I didn't say a single word! Then after he ate he asked if I was going to start going out every weekend with my friends once I Lost my weight

    -____-

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